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BTS One-Shots

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A/N: Trigger warnings ahead. Mentions of suicide and depression.

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Last words

Dearest Taehyung,


You have been my best friend, my lover, and the light in my life since we first met over a year ago now. I have loved you with my whole heart. I couldn’t imagine ever loving someone such as you, until you came along.


You provided me with hope for the future. Hope for love. And best of all, allowed me to experience what love actually feels like.
I haven’t had or felt so strongly in such a long time, Taehyung. We have been through it all – love, hate, violence, turbulence, and anger. You made me complete Kim Taehyung and I couldn’t have asked for a more beautiful person in my life than you.


By now you know that I have issues - I mean who doesn’t right? But you have been understanding and patient with me, coaxing me through my panic and anxiety, and all of the times that I kept you awake crying because of my depression.


You have stuck with me through thick and thin. No matter what I had problems with, you were there with me, whether you were by my side or not. I could call you at any time of the day or night and you would be patient with me, not caring that I was encroaching on your personal time. I know your friends chastised you over it, but you didn’t care, taking it in stride, just as long as I was alright.


If I ever had a problem I knew who to go to, I knew who I could call by pressing that one number on the phone pad. I waited with baited breath until you picked up the phone and could soothe my frayed nerves or calm me down from whatever emotions that are coursing through my blood at the moment.


I loved being able to see your face on Skype or on Facetime whenever it was an option, which you always penciled in time during the day. It didn’t matter if you were tired, you still made time for me and let me know that I was loved. That you were thinking of me.


Which only made me fall more in love with you every moment that you did something sweet for me. Like when you were across the globe, but didn’t forget to have flowers sent to our house, or when you would come home from tour one day earlier just to surprise me. I loved every minute that we spent together and would never exchange it for anything in the world.


But unfortunately, things must come to an end. Please know that this decision didn’t have anything to do with you at all Tae. I love you more than I have loved anyone or could ever love anyone. I want you to move on from me Tae. Move on and find a nice girl who will give you a family. A nice girl who isn’t anything like me, and would make the world proud that she is your girlfriend.


Taehyung, I don’t believe that you know what was running through my mind on the day that we met. I was such a wreck and you were so nice and kind that I never wanted our interaction to come to an end.


Perhaps if I told you about my internal struggles more in depth we wouldn’t be standing on the edge of the precipice that we are right now. Perhaps if I found it within my heart to trust you more, to not worry and obsess that you might leave me for acting a certain way then I could have lived my whole life at your side.


But that isn’t the way that my mind works. I couldn’t just let you in to see the darkest side of me that I held deep within my body. I couldn’t trust you not to break my heart, even though you had proven time and time again that you weren’t giving up on me, no matter how difficult I acted to test your limits.


I didn’t tell you about the swirling mass of insecurities that raged inside my soul. I didn’t tell you about how much I wanted to jump off of a bridge every time we crossed one. I didn’t tell you my fantasies with the razor blade that I kept taped underneath my desk for emergencies if I ever needed it.


You noticed on several occasions my fixation on something particularly fatal, and you would mention it in passing, becoming more confused when I became panicked. I couldn’t have you know how much death was a friend of mine. Nor could I have you know that I was frequently suicidal.


I didn’t want you to look at me any different than you have – not with pity or fear shimmering behind those chocolate brown orbs that I loved so much. I didn’t want you to watch me like a hawk, making sure that I wasn’t alone for an insurmountable amount of time. But most of all I didn’t want you to lock me into a mental institution where I would sit and rot until it became time for me to be released. And when that time came, I might find out that you had moved on with the supermodel babe with whom you have two and a half children, a white picket fence, and a family dog.


Therefore, I was too scared to confide in you my struggles of everyday living. My struggles with wanting to be alive to make it to the next day. You helped me tremendously with your way of loving me, letting me know that everything was alright. That everyone had problems as well and I wasn’t a lesser person because of it. But I didn’t want to believe that, and I still do not believe that.


That’s why I have written this note, Tae. Because when you come home I’m not going to be here. Not here as in this house, but here as in existence. I will cease to exist from this point onward, once I have finished saying what I need to.


I love you more than the entire universe times the milky way Tae. I always have and I always will. I even made a journal for the future – what our lives would be like over the course of the next few years because I had hope for me and you. I had hope for us. And I had hope in having a future.


But I realized that I cannot have a future like this anymore. I cannot go through the motions making everyone believe that I am alright. That I am truly fine and that everything will be okay. That I love the way that the words future flow off my tongue and that one day all of my fears will dissipate, and my hopes and dreams will flourish. I believed in that for so long Taehyung, but now I am simply exhausted.


I am exhausted at not being strong enough to go my own way. I am exhausted at having to disappoint everyone by having constant anxiety and panic attacks. I am exhausted at having to call you, and for you to calm me down, even though you have your own life. I am exhausted making the trek from the bed to the bathroom because my body still wants to survive. My body is still living, but my mind is not.


I don’t want you to blame yourself over my shortcomings Tae. This is all my fault and none of the consequences are your own.


I want you to continue to live your life Tae. Live your life for not only yourself, but for your future. Don’t do what I have done and end it short because there is nothing left for you here. You have an amazing family, great friends, a brilliant career, and lots of fans, ARMY, who support you no matter what you do in life.


I do love you so much – or as Jimin would say, to the moon and back. I love you so much that I can’t even bear the thought of what your face will look like when you get home in several hours. I love you and all of the guys, because they have been there for me as well.
Don’t waste your time on me Tae. I’m not worth the tears or the pain that will follow. Get over me, find a nice girl to settle down with. Have children and continue to be a model. Your fans need you Tae. I love you.

Love,
Stella

Taehyung crushed the paper in his palm while he stood over the gravestone. She wanted to be buried in America, even though she loved South Korea. His tears blurred his vision and he found it hard to see the engraving on the stone. Every year he came back to this place twice. Once on her birthday, the next time on their anniversary. Bang PD-nim knew and left his schedule open for four days. Sometimes one or more of the guys would come.


The letter was so worn from the many times he had read it, but that was okay. Taehyung knew the letters by heart, they were inked into the back of his eyes. He didn’t need the harsh black contrasting with the innocent white to remind him of the words that broke his heart. To remind him of how they found you when they came home a day later from tour.


He always wondered what if they would have gotten off early, what if they would have prevented this. He could have gotten you help and you would have still been alive. The guilt and pain ate at him for months, until Suga shook him awake. His second eldest hyung took him out, let him get his pain and agony out, and brought him back to the dorm where he was able to rest a little easier. It was still hard to function, day by day, without you by his side, but he did it. Some days were harder than others, but Kim Taehyung was nothing if not bound by the words you left. Bound by his everlasting love for you.


“I love you, Stella.” He whispered before he turned away.

Chapter Text

A/N: Nothing angsty or triggering in this work. I do not own Humble and Kind. I just used it for this work. Enjoy!

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Youtube Song Text Prank on J-Hope!

 

I was a famous YouTuber, who went to VidCon every year. I actually attended a fansign which is how I met the guys of BTS. I guess J-Hope was getting teased by his bandmates because he watched my videos over and over again, but I was no better. I would watch the interviews, just for J-Hope! It is safe to say that the both of us got together after that.

“Hello earthlings! This is Sapphira here with a new video! Whoo hoo! Everyone get up and dance! Come on, dance!” I started my signature video beginnings. “Whoo! After that, I need a breather!” I stopped dancing and sat down in the chair in front of my desk.

“Gosh that was exhilarating!” I breathed out. “Anyway! I’ve gotten a lot of requests for this, so here we go. J-Hope is out at the studio right now, and I chose a song that I know he has no idea the lyrics to. Here we go!”

 

J-Hope, babe are you busy?

“Well now we just have to wait. Like I said he’s at the studio, so I don’t know when he’ll contact back.”

I sat there and waited bored. I finally cut the camera and began to scroll through my favorite sites. 45 minutes later and he dinged. I turned back on the camera.

“Okay, so I just came back, 45 minutes later! He finally decided to reply! It’s a go!”

~No, we’re wrapping up the session. It is almost 10. U need anything?

“Alright, so here it goes.” I whispered into the camera before texting and then showing them the text.

~ You know there’s a light that glows by the front door

I had to wait only a few minutes before I got a reply. I giggled at it.

~Thanks babe. U in bed?

“He thinks I’m in bed. Oh this is too good!” I whispered again before texting the next line. “Wait why am I whispering?”

 

~Don’t forget the keys under the mat.

 

~I didn’t 4get my keys, did I?

“Hahahaha! I like this. I’m totally pranking the other guys too!” I giggled madly before doing the next line.

~Childhood stars shine.

 

~Is this ur way of having me take u out? U just have to ask sweetheart!

“He thinks I’m trying to hint that I want him to take me out! This is rich guys,” I chortled into the microphone before continuing onwards with the prank.

~Always stay humble and kind

~Ira what are u talking about?

I giggled as the prank was starting to take shape now. “Now this is what I’m talking about,” I giggled into the camera as I continued on the streak.

~Go to church ‘cause your momma says to

It took longer for J-Hope to respond this time. I could see the little dots indicating that he was typing on his iPhone, but then they would still. Then commence.

“Guys I think he’s getting worried about my sanity now,” I giggled and waited for the new text to come through.

~Sweetheart r u drunk? I’ll be home in a bit.

“Next line,” I laughed.

~Visit grandpa every chance that you can

“Well guys, the line went dead for a few moments. Let’s see what his next move is!” I laughed and nearly fell off my chair.

~It won’t be a waste of time

~Did u take something? R u okay? Sweetheart what’s going on? I’m going to be home shortly!!!!!!!

I started to laugh at this one. . . It was so funny. “I’m glad that you all asked me to do this prank. Okay here goes.”

~Hold the door, say please, say thank you

The wait wasn’t for long as the bubbles started to move at the end of the screen. I laughed into the screen as he continued to type.

~Ira, wats going on? Do u think that I’ve been rude?

“Oh my god,” I giggled madly.

~Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie

~Um, sweetheart I don’t!

“Wow, he still hasn’t learnt anything from dating me yet!” I laughed at him and his cluelessness.

~I know you got mountains to climb but Always stay humble and kind

~Thanks I think? Where r u? Do I need to come pick u up?

“Apparently J-Hope thinks I’m drunk right now. Um, I’m not, by the way, and I have rarely been drunk,” I winked at the camera. “So I’m going to skip some of these lines, because I’m sure that by now he’s suspecting something is up.”

~Don’t expect a free ride from no one

Don’t hold a grudge or a chip and here’s why

Bitterness keeps you from flying

“Now we wait for his response,” I cackled madly as I waited for him to respond.

~Really, sweetheart, where r u? I’m going to get Yoongi to come get u.

~Know the difference between sleeping with someone

And sleeping with someone you love

I love you ain’t no pick up line so

~What r u going on about?

~I’m so confused.

~Do u think I’m cheating on u?

~Sweetheart I do love u.

~Ira, baby, just call me.

“Okay, people, so here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to send him a picture of the artist who sings this song, he’s probably not going to get it, but, I have one more chunk to send him. Then I’ll surprise him with this prank.” I smiled at the camera.

~When it’s hot, eat a root beer popsicle

Shut off the AC and roll the windows down

Let that summer sun shine

Don’t take for granted the love this life gives you

When you get where you’re going

Don’t forget, turn back around

Help the next one in line

It took several moments before I received a phone call. I panicked and threw my arms into the air, jarring the camera.

“Oh no! What do I do?” I asked the camera, looking at the phone in my hand. “I guess I’ll just answer it. Here it goes!”

“Hey J-Hope!” I answered cheerily, putting him on speaker phone so everyone could hear the conversation.

“Where the fuck are you?” He asked angrily. I tried to keep the giggles inside of my body, but it didn’t seem like that was going to work.

“Um, at home. I’ve been in the shower for the past thirty minutes, why?” I asked him, going the innocent route.

“You’ve been in the shower?” J-Hope asked, disbelief lacing his voice. “Namjoon are we almost home?”

“Why is Namjoon taking you home?” I asked, now the confusion was real.

“Because I was worried sick about you Ira!” He snapped. “I’ve been getting some weird texts - ”

I couldn’t help myself. I started to laugh so hard that I fell off the edge of my bed onto the ground with a loud thump. I let out a moan of pain before the laughing commenced.

“What the fuck?”

“Don’t fucking swear!” Jin screeched in the background, which only made me laugh harder.

“Oh my God J-Hope!” I chortled between laughter.

“WHAT?” J-Hope was not sounding happy.

“And that, my dear subscribers is how to effectively pull off the song text prank with your significant other! Say hi to YouTube J-Hope!” I said and then I heard Namjoon, Jungkook, V, and Jimin start to laugh.

“You did well with this one!” V offered. I grinned.

“Thank you. I’ve earned the seal of approval from Kim Taehyung everyone! Well it’s time for me to go, do something that isn’t sitting in front of the computer and scrolling sites. I love you guys. Stay strong. Stay proud. Stay humble. Stay kind. Stay funny. Believe in yourself. Believe that you’re beautiful, because you are! G’night mates!”

“Ugh, that was awful!” I heard before I turned off the camera.

“Oh shut up!” I yelled back.

“I’m almost home, Ira.” J-Hope spoke up.

“Sorry?” I offered.

“Oh you are going to be.”

“Gross, hyung!” Jungkook groaned.

“See you soon! Thanks guys!”

 

 

 

Chapter Text

A/N: Here's another one shot I found floating around on my hard-drive. Triggering with anxiety, panic attacks, and low self esteem.

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Perfection

Jimin and I had been together for a little over seven months. I had moved into his apartment and we had furnished it together. I met with the entire Park family and BTS, but Jimin had never met my family. And I prayed that he never would.

Once I was old enough to leave the house, I did so and moved across several continents to South Korea where I worked my butt off so that I had money for my rent and to pay for tuition to college. Of course, this meant that I could only take like one or two classes a semester, but it was better than nothing.

It was at my job that I had met the 5’9” blonde guy that had girls begging for his attention. But I had never met him before, nor was I up to date on the celebrity gossip, so therefore, Park Jimin was just another guy in the crowd that day.

He ordered a coffee, I remember thinking that he was attractive and since I was serving his coffee, I should totally do that cliché message on the cup thing, but I didn’t. I just handed him the coffee and told him the total. He handed me a ten thousand Won note, and told me to keep the change with a wink. Then he sauntered out of the store and went about his life.

This became a daily routine. Every day at 10:10 exactly, Park Jimin would come in, ask for the same drink – a chocolate mocha – and then hand me ten thousand Won before leaving.

Finally, about two months after this routine started Jimin came in with a guy that had blue hair. Jimin seemed nervous as he came up to me to request his mocha and the other guy with him ordered a regular coffee with one sugar and milk. I was quick to oblige and handed them their coffees.

“Here,” Jimin handed me a twenty. I went to give him the change but he just smirked at me. “Keep the change.”

“Jimin has something he wants to say to you,” the other guy blurted out and Jimin looked nervous.

“Okay?” I was nervous as well. What could he possibly want to say to me? It turns out that he wanted to take me out on a date. After that, you could say the rest was history.

 

When I moved in with Jimin he found out that I was working full time as well as trying to go to college. Jimin supported my dreams, and also told me that I didn’t need to kill myself for the tuition. He paid for my college tuition, even though I didn’t ask him to do so.

In order to make it up to Jimin, I made sure that the apartment was always clean, I did the laundry, folded the clothes, cleaned the apartment, made dinner, and also made sure that my grades were excellent.

I learned this from living in the house with my father. Everything had to be perfect – not a speck of dirt, not a wrinkle in his clothing, and nothing less than an A on an assignment or my report card.

But it was a double-edged sword with my father as well. If I did too well, he was mad and it seemed like he was almost jealous of my success. But if I didn’t do well then my father would scream and break anything in his path, reducing me to tears and cowering the corner. Then I’d be told to clean up the mess and he would shout ‘Look what you made me do!’

Therefore, this type of response was conditioned inside my body. I learned that in order to keep the peace, I needed to be exact. To be perfect. Everything needed to be perfect. That way my father would love me. Jimin would love me.

 

Then came the day seven months into our relationship. I had been enrolled in College Algebra. It was over my head and I couldn’t comprehend it. I didn’t ask Jimin for help, even though he was a whiz at math because he would be disappointed in me. He would laugh at my stupidity and realize that he was wasting his time on me. Therefore, I struggled on my own, trying to make sense of the numbers. I just memorized the formulas so that I could apply them to the test, but it seems like I got them all mixed up.

I had expected a B on the test, which wasn’t acceptable, but not a C-, staring me in the face. I could feel the anxiety building up inside my body as I got inside of my small car and made my way to the apartment. There was no way that Jimin wouldn’t flip out. No way that I could salvage this nice phase in our relationship.

I was quiet as I walked up the stairs to the apartment. With shaking hands, I fished for my keys and unlocked the door. I could hear the television going and the sounds of the guys in the living room, so I knew that everyone was here.

“Belle?” I heard Jimin yell as I set the keys in the bowl by the front door. I shut the door and locked it before sighing.

“Yes?” I asked back, my voice quiet and devoid of emotion.

“How was your day?” I moved to stand inside of the living room and looked over at Jimin who was genuinely curious.

“Fine,” I whispered and looked down at my scuffed tennis shoes.

“Doesn’t sound fine,” Jimin’s voice held a bit of concern in it. I just shook my head.

“Hey, didn’t you have a big test today?” Namjoon asked and my heart stopped.

“Yeah,” I muttered.

“How’d it go?” Taehyung asked me, curious about what I had received on the test.

“Come off it Tae!” Yoongi rolled his eyes. “Nothing less than perfect like always, right, Belle?”

“Not exactly,” I fought back the tears at the inevitable rage that was to come.

“It couldn’t be that bad,” Jungkook was the first to break the silence.

“Yeah, babe. Let’s see it,” Jimin stood up and held out his hand. I slowly retrieved the test and handed it to him, not meeting his eyes.

“Belle,” Namjoon came over and looked at the grade as well.

“I’m sorry!” I whispered, on the verge of a panic attack. “I’ll do better next time, I promise!”

“Belle!” Jimin sounded concerned. I met his concerned eyes for a split second before I dropped my gaze onto the floor.

“I’m stupid, I know that. I should have studied more. I’m so sorry. I know that you probably hate me for this, but Jimin I promise I will do better!” I cried, tears rolling down my cheeks as I fought against the panic in my body.

“Jimin?” Yoongi sounded confused and concerned as he and the rest of the guys also stood up. “What’s going on here?”

“Dude, I’m just as confused as you are.” Jimin shot back before turning back to me. “Belle what’s going on?”

“I’m so sorry. I know that you’ve spent money on my tuition and I repay you by failing. I’m really sorry!” I burst out, and then my breathing was screwed. I was struggling for breath and Namjoon put a hand on my back. I flinched away from him and he held up his hands in a surrender motion.

“Belle, calm the fuck down,” Yoongi said in his blunt and gruff way. He grabbed my shoulders, not caring about the way I flinched away from him. “Look at me. Breathe, in and out. In and out. With me.”

I looked up into my best friend’s eyes and tried to mimic his breathing. As I started to get the hang of it, he kept encouraging me. Once my breathing evened, Yoongi set me down on the couch. Jin appeared with a mug of tea in hand, which I took with shaky hands.

“What’s going on?” Hobi asked. “Why were you so riled up over this grade?”

“Sorry, sorry, I’m really sorry!” I burst out. “Please Jimin, don’t throw me out. I can do better. I will do better!”

“What? Jagi, no,” Jimin dropped to his knees in front of me, taking the mug from my hands. “Jagi, it’s one bad grade. It won’t break us.”

“But it’s not perfect,” I stuttered out, voice hiccupping over the force of my sobs. He shushed me, rubbing circles into my thighs.

“You don’t need to be perfect,” Jimin promised. “Where’s this coming from?”

“If I’m perfect I’ll be loved,” I said, reiterating what was running through my mind. I heard some of the guys suck in a shocked breath, other’s swearing.

“Belle where did you get that idea?” Jin asked, sitting beside me on the couch.

“If I was less than perfect my dad would get mad,” I said, confused as to why they were reacting this way.

“Is this why you have everything spotless?” Taehyung asked, brow furrowed as he watched me. I nodded, hiccupping a little.

“Jagi, I don’t want you to be anything but yourself,” Jimin stated, turning my head to face him. “I love you for who you are. If that involves a C on a test, that’s fine. This isn’t healthy.”

“And Belle if you want to do well, come ask me or Jimin. You know Jimin is good at math,” Namjoon stated. “Anyone of us would be willing to help.”

“Yeah, Belle, if we love Jungkook who got a 4 on an English test, your 78% means nothing,” Yoongi said with a smirk on his catlike face. I snorted and Jungkook looked horror struck.

“Hyung we promised not to speak of it!” Jungkook was angry, but I giggled, needing this to settle my nerves.

 

Life didn’t miraculously become better after that. I suffered panic attacks and more if I felt that I had been less than perfect, and Jimin encouraged this. He would have me leave dishes in the sink after dinner while we watched movies. My mind would be on the dishes, and once we went to bed I slunk off to finish the chores.

The same with everything else. Jimin tried to get me to just chill with the chores, but I couldn’t. After so many years of being conditioned that I needed to have things perfect, it was difficult to break. I did allow Jimin and Namjoon to assist with my math homework. This often ended with me in tears and frustrated, but the guys were patient.

Yoongi put his foot down to the tactics Jimin was using to break me of my pattern, when they were around for dinner. I was dragged by the maknae line to watch a movie, and throughout the movie I took to digging my fingernails into my palm until blood welled. Yoongi had been keeping a close eye on me, and once the movie was paused since Hobi decided drinking three glasses of coke was a great idea, he saw the blood leaking from my clenched fist.

“Belle, what are you doing!” Yoongi demanded, prying my fists open. I whimpered as the other members saw the sight in front of them.

“Jesus,” Jin gasped, getting up to grab the first aid kit. He disinfected the cuts that I inflicted.

“I’m sorry. I’m trying not to think of the dishes,” I muttered, hanging my head, not wanting to meet the disappointed gaze of Jimin.

“Why didn’t you say something?” Jimin asked, voice concerned and still sweet. I shrugged.

“Why don’t we go do the dishes now,” Taehyung suggested. “That way Belle can relax and enjoy the movie.”

“But there is still the laundry to be done, the floors will need swept, popcorns on the floor,” I whimpered, ticking down my mental checklist.

“Alright,” Yoongi sighed, as Jin went into the kitchen with Jungkook to do the dishes. The grumpy member of the group took out his phone and made a call, leaving the room. When he came back Jimin had me wrapped into his arms, whispering sweet words into my ear.

“Tomorrow I’m taking you to your appointment,” Yoongi announced, dropping his cellphone onto the glass table littered with thousands of snacks and empty cups.

“What, hyung?” Jimin asked, raising his head from where it was sitting on top of my head.

“I made her an appointment with my therapist,” Yoongi stated, sitting down onto the chair. “She reminds me of what I went through, before.”

“OCD?” Namjoon asked, mental gears moving.

“Possibly,” Yoongi replied, yawning as Hobi joined us. He took in the tense atmosphere, and the lack of the eldest and youngest.

“What did I miss?”

“Nothing much. You guys almost done?” Namjoon asked.

“In a minute,” Jin called back. When they rejoined everyone turned back to the movie, but no one was watching it. They were all dwelling on what happened, and how I could get better, or in Hobi’s case wondering what he missed.

 

The next day I resisted going to a shrink. I didn’t need a shrink. I didn’t have anything wrong with me. It ended up being Yoongi yanking me down the stairs, Jimin protesting, while I was thrown around at his hyung’s whim. He threw me into the backseat, having activated the child locks so I couldn’t get out.

I pouted in the backseat and refused to talk to either of them. They were trying to force me into going to a crazy doctor. I wasn’t crazy, and I didn’t need to see this person. Jimin sighed after he attempted to coax me into conversation to be met with silence multiple times. Yoongi just said quietly to leave me be, and the rest of the trip was spent with the sound of music and their low tones talking in the front seat.

When we made it, Jimin kept a tight grip on me to make sure I wouldn’t bolt. At this point in time I was more resigned, and knew that they would make me speak with this person. After sitting for what felt like eternity I was called back. I looked back at Jimin and Yoongi biting my lip, wanting to call for one of them to come with me, but my anger was still too raw. I marched back with the nurse who led me to a room.

The woman inside was nice enough, I suppose. A kind smile, pictures of her family, and books on the wall. She looked up at me with a smile and invited me to sit down on the couch in front of her desk. I did as she asked, accepting the cup of corn tea she handed me.

“Belle, is it?”

“Hmm.”

“Yoongi called me to say you’ve been having bad anxiety and panic attacks. Is that true?”

I said nothing, just sipped the tea. She smiled instead of getting angry as I supposed she might.

“Alright. We don’t have to talk about that right now. I want you to know that anything that we say stays inside these walls. Nothing will be disclosed, unless of course I deem you a danger to yourself or others. Then I have to report that,” she shuffled papers. “Let’s start with what is your favorite candy.”

At this I picked my head up to look at her. Why did she want to know my favorite candy? I furrowed my brows and picked at my jean clad thighs. What if I chose the wrong type and I found myself in the middle of a mental institution?

“What’s going through your head right now Belle?” She asked after I didn’t answer. I shrugged. “Belle, there’s no right or wrong answer. I would just like to know what type of candy you enjoy.”

“I don’t know,” I whispered. “I would say Pepero.”

“I like Pepero as well. Which flavor?”

“Jimin always likes chocolate cookie,” I supplied.

“That’s nice, but Belle what flavor do you like?” She started to write something down. It made me nervous. Did I say the wrong thing?”

“Um, chocolate cookie.”

“Is that because it is something you always buy for Jimin and it’s in the house, or if given the choice would you choose that flavor for yourself?”

“I’ve always purchased Chocolate cookie. It’s – ”

“Jimin’s favorite, I know,” she said staring at me with such an intense gaze that I ducked my head. “Have you tried other flavors?”

“No,” I said, my voice a small whisper. “Jungkook and V like them, but I’ve never asked. They work so hard, they need every thing they can to relax and enjoy their snacks.”

“So is this because you don’t want to disturb them?”

“Yeah. I don’t want to bother them. I’m content with getting the kind that Jimin likes,” I stated. She nodded.

“I understand wanting to get the things that your partner likes, but why did you not purchase things that you like? Or want to try?” She pressed, her pen in hand.

“Because it’s Jimin’s money. He shouldn’t have to spend more on me than what he already does,” I stated, playing with my fingers.

“I see,” she hummed, but I didn’t think she did.

“I’m not crazy,” I insisted.

“No you aren’t. You’re just very – how to put this. I guess I could call it in loose terms submissive,” the psychologist stated. I flushed. “Not sexually, but you probably are in that regard as well. But you have a need to please other’s. This comes at a detriment to yourself at times. Like not purchasing items that you want since you don’t want to anger anyone or waste their money.”

“Jimin already pays my school tuition,” I stated.

“Have you talked with Jimin about this? I’m sure Jimin wouldn’t mind if you wanted to purchase a few things that you wanted.”

“I can’t!” I stated, panicked. “He spends so much money on me as it is! I can’t ask for more.”

“Belle, this isn’t being selfish. Every human being has needs and I bet there are foods that Jimin loves that you dislike,” she reasoned.

“No. I like everything that Jimin likes,” I said, shaking my head.

“And if Jimin’s favorite food is jjajangmyeon and tomorrow decides he hates it. What then? You like jjajangmyeon, but he doesn’t any longer. What is your outlook on this food?”

“If he doesn’t want it, then I shouldn’t buy it,” I said.

“Belle, this isn’t healthy. I’m sure that Jimin is caring towards you, but you are neglecting yourself,” a ding went off. She sighed since it was the end of our session. “I have some homework for you. Take this,” I was handed a journal. “Write down things that you do during the day and your thoughts. I also want to give you one more bit of homework. The next time that you go to the store, I want you to buy something that you want. It can be something as small as a lollipop or a packet of gum. I want you to write in your journal what it was, and how you felt.”

“Okay,” I whispered, clutching the sticky note with the homework instructions and the journal.

“Good. Give this to my secretary. She will make appointments for you at the same time every Monday and Thursday. And don’t worry, that’s why I am here this late. It’s discretion for idols.” She winked and showed me out of the door. I handed the note to the receptionist who made the appointments. Then I joined Jimin and Yoongi in the waiting room.

“Ready?” Jimin asked, smile on his face. I nodded and clutched the journal closer to my chest.

“She’s not scary,” Yoongi gave me a wry smile. I nodded and we left the office.

Over the course of the next two days I tried not to go to the store. I didn’t want to have to do what she stated, but when it came down to it, we needed food. My hands were shaking at the end of the trip and I had attempted to add multiple items that I wanted, only to put them back. This ranged from fruit, ramyeon, ice cream, snacks, and other items. I was standing in line when I grabbed a chocolate bar as the cashier was ringing out the items and handed it to him. I was in a hurry to pay so I didn’t chicken out and went to my car, where I loaded the groceries, placing the bag with my chocolate bar in the passenger’s seat.

I was filled with the desire to rush to the service desk to return the item, but instead put the key in the ignition. I started the car and drove home, anxiety and panic threatening to overwhelm me. When I rushed into the apartment Jimin and the guys were home.

“Hey Belle, how was shopping?” Jungkook asked. I asked him not to call me noona months prior, so he just called me by name.

“Fine,” my voice was stressed as I rushed into the kitchen. They came to help me put stuff away when Taehyung pulled out the chocolate bar from my bag.

“Belle you got a chocolate bar?” He pouted.

“Yuck!” Jimin wrinkled his nose. “Dark chocolate.”

“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “I forgot you didn’t like it. I won’t get it again.”

“Jagi, it’s okay. You wanted it right?” Jimin chuckled, kissing my cheek. “Enjoy your treat. You deserve it.”

“But you don’t like dark chocolate. I should have grabbed the milk chocolate,” I stressed, wringing my hands together.

“Belle, darling, you deserve to get things for yourself as well,” Jin said in his eomma voice, making tears well in my eyes. I shook my head.

“No I don’t. Jimin’s already doing so much for me,” I protested, making the rest of BTS stop and look at me incredulously.

“Jagi, are you saying that you never buy yourself anything that you want when you go to the store?” Jimin asked, hand frozen in the fridge.

“That’s exactly what she is saying,” Yoongi, ever so helpful, supplied.

“No, no, no!” Jimin shook his head.

“I’ve never seen her buy things that she wants,” Jin mused. He opened the cupboards. “Jimin isn’t this everything that you enjoy?”

“Fuck. I’ve never noticed that before. Jagi, no.” Jimin scolded. I stared at him, surprised at his reaction.

“But I don’t want to be ungrateful,” I whispered.

“You aren’t,” Jimin sounded close to tears. “All this time and I never noticed.” His laugh sounded bitter. “Don’t worry things will be different.”

 

And like that, things were different. I still attend weekly counseling sessions with the psychologist, but she’s deemed me better to only need one session per week. Jimin is happy to note that there is one cupboard denoted to my albeit sparse items that I enjoy, he’s just happy that I am buying things for myself. He also tries to do more of the chores around the house, while signing me up for activities.

 Like glass painting, drawing, tennis, dance, and book clubs. I laughed at him, but attended all of them. When I would come home, Jimin and I would talk about whether or not I enjoyed the classes and if I wanted to go back. We were communicating once more, and our relationship has become way more healthy.

Chapter Text

A/N: This has been modified from another site that I published this to. It was for another character, but I found that this matched Jungkook, so I modified it. Enjoy!

Jungkook

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C3q0h2HWEAAXIL8.jpg

Jungkook and I had been a couple for a while now, though we didn’t really want any of his fans to know about our relationship. We were both concerned about the hate that we would receive, and I did not want my life jeopardized over jealous fans. Jungkook agreed with this, more so because we had my little sister to think about – she was only three years old.

We did not want the fans to come up with some kind of assumption that Jungkook and I had a child out of wedlock or anything like that. Or that I had a child before I met Jungkook and thus was just using him for his money and fame.

My parents had passed away suddenly when I was only eighteen, leaving me with bills, a debt, and a six-month old sister! Low and behold I had to become responsible very quickly, even if it meant that I gave up my dream of college. I attended night classes, but could only take one at a time with working three jobs and raising a small child.

I remember when I met Jeon Jungkook. It had been a few months after my sister had become my responsibility. I was stressed and had stopped for a second at a Starbucks, which I don’t normally do, with my financial situation, but I really needed a coffee and I had a gift card that my boss had given me, so therefore I stopped before work.

That’s when I ended up running, quite literally into a guy with brown hair, bunny teeth, and wide eyes. I knocked his coffee out of his hands and it hit the ground with a splat. I could feel the tears starting to well up in my eyes, and I tried not to cry so much, but my day was already going so well. I couldn’t control myself and ended up crying and trying to apologize to him.

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s alright,” the guy looked at me wide-eyed for a moment before wrapping his arms around me in a hug. It might be selfish of me to gather comfort from a stranger, but it had been the first time in months that someone had hugged me, shown me some form of affection, so I wrapped my arms around him and cried harder. He was awkward as he patted my back and maneuvered me into sitting on a chair.

“I’m sorry,” I muttered once I had calmed down and wiped my cheeks. I hid my face behind my loose hair as it was burning red.

“Hey it’s no problem,” the guy said. He sounded nice and like he wanted to know why I was crying on a complete stranger over a spilt coffee. “What’s the matter?”

My eyes at that moment landed on a clock and I let out a curse, well a curse for me, but it only served to make the guy laugh. I thrust the gift card at him as an apology.

“I’m really sorry I have to go,” I muttered as I handed him the gift card.

“Wait what’s this for?” The guy yelled back at me as I was opening the door.

“To replace the coffee that I knocked out of your hands!” I replied and flew out of the door and got into the bus. I couldn’t afford to miss the transit as I would have to wait until 15 minutes for the next bus to take me into Hongdae I went to my first job as assistant librarian.

 

That was the first time that I had met Jeon Jungkook even though I didn’t know what his name was at that time. He later revealed to me that he waited at Starbucks every day at the same time for a month, hoping to find me, but eventually gave up after I didn’t show up. However, he found me, a month and a half after our initial encounter while I was working at this music store in the mall. He came in to get a few CDs and we ended up talking throughout my shift. That was when we exchanged names and phone numbers, just to be friends.

 

Six months later and Jungkook asked me out. He knew about my responsibilities and never asked me to compromise. Jungkook would take both Madeleine and I out on dates, knowing that I already felt guilty for leaving her with my best friends for so long.

One year ago, Jungkook moved into our apartment, helping me keep up the bills and even taking care of Mads. He loved her as if she was his own sister, helping her get ready for bed, getting her ready in the morning, taking her out. She didn’t spend as much time with my best friends after Jungkook moved in, which I was glad, and I could cut out my weekend job. I was able to take a couple of courses last semester.

 

Then today, Sunday Jungkook called me to ask if Mads and I would like to visit him while they were on vacation in Japan. Him and his groupmates had been working nonstop for their next comeback, but he wanted me to come see them. I laughed and immediately agreed. He chuckled and told me to text him the details, etc, so that he might be able to know when I was going to arrive. I had to call my employers and took my vacation for the first time in three years.

“Mads we are going to visit Jungkook at the studio!” I blew kisses at her and she squealed. I rolled my eyes at her as she made grabby motions towards me.

“UP!” She demanded. I just picked her up without reprimand because I was so happy that I was going to see Jungkook for the first time in like two months. I hadn’t even had an opportunity to visit BTS Vlive channel, besides I was forbidden by Jungkook at looking through the videos, something about wanting it to be a surprise.

The next day after work I made the arrangements. Mads and I would be taking a plane to Hokkaido and then staying with the guys for a week. I got us all packed and made arrangements for the pets. Tuesday night I had trouble sleeping as I was excited about seeing him while they were on vacation!!!!!

 

“Come on Mads,” I coaxed my little sister as we walked through airport security. She didn’t like the airplane, but it wasn’t too awful as I managed to put earbuds on her ears and she calmed down. Now we were gathering our luggage and getting into a cab. I had told Jungkook that our flight was the later flight, so that I could surprise him.

“Where to ma’am?” the cabby took my luggage and put it into the trunk of his cab.

“I need to stop at a grocery store then,” I gave him the address to where BTS were staying. He grinned at me a little and nodded. I took Mads and we purchased several flavors of ice cream bars because several members didn’t like certain flavors, like Jimin disliked Mango. Then the cabby took up to the lot where their rental house was located.

“Have fun!” the cabby called out after helping me with the luggage and after I had given him fare and a generous tip.

“Thanks! Have a great day!” I called back to him as we made our way through the crowded parking lot. I saw someone that I recognized as a manager and stopped him quickly. “Uh, sorry to stop you, but can you point me to where the rooms of BTS are? I’m here as Jungkook requested, Y/N and Madeleine.”

“No problem,” Jae-sun was very nice to me and even picked up my suitcases leaving me to handle Madeleine.

“Thank you very much,” we were joined by Sejin once the managers found out what was going on. Mads was very amused by Sejin who kept making funny faces at her. At one point she demanded that he picked her up, which he obliged the princess leaving me empty handed.

“Now I look like I’m just using you guys!” I laughed at them as we walked through the parking lot.

“No, you are giving us something to do,” Jae-sun reassured me. “Sejin has a soft spot for kids.”

“Well I’m glad. Now I know of someone I can call if I need a babysitter!” I laughed. Finally, we ended up by their room. “Thank you for helping me.”

“No problem,” Sejin said. “Give me your phone, let me know if you need anything okay?”

“Alright,” I grinned and then started to shake in anticipation. “Come on Mads. Let’s go see Gookie!” She giggled as I plucked her from Sejin’s arms and went over to the door. I knocked and Namjoon looked out the peephole at me. I motioned for him to open the door and he did so.

“Why are you here so early, Y/N?”

“Is Jungkook here?” I asked him. “I caught an earlier flight to surprise him. Surprise?”

“Oh! Yeah he’s here. We are all in the lounge right now, so,” I handed Madeleine to Namjoon before grabbing my suitcases and lugging them up onto the steps.

“Joonie who was at the door?” It sounded like Jin said that. We shut the door and then I took Mads from Namjoon, who went first.

“Uh someone wanting an autograph. I invited her in so everyone be nice!” Namjoon said before he sat down.

“Hello!” J-Hope and Jimin waved to me. Jungkook glanced up from his phone and his eyes widened.

“Y/N?”

“Hey Jungkook,” I gave my boyfriend a smile. He stood up and then grabbed us in a tight hug. Mads was clearly happy and grabbed a hold of his light brown colored hair.

“OW! Madeleine!” Jungkook yelped and broke away from us.

“This is why you didn’t want me to see your Vlive videos isn’t it?” I gently tugged on a lock of his hair after prying Madeleine’s hand out of his hair.

“Yeah,” he said sheepishly. “Do you like?” I looked at him for a moment before nodding.

“Yes. I guess this looks good on you,” I said flippantly. He laughed at me.

 “OH!” I grabbed the bag and offered them to everyone, which everyone took one.

“Thanks Y/N!” Jimin looked amazed that I had remembered his intolerance to Mango flavored ice creams.

“I’m not too fond of mango flavored so I found these variety pack! Plus, I know that everyone has been working very hard, so you all deserve a treat!” I stated before setting Madeleine down. I ripped open a bar and handed it to her. She started to devour the cold treat, getting chocolate all over her fingers and face.

“I’m glad that you are here,” Jungkook pressed a quick kiss to my lips as I left Madeleine in the lounge with the others. We were getting Mads bed set up; hers was in the corner of our room so that I could get to her in the middle of the night.

“Mmm,” I hummed before deepening the kiss.

“Kookie!” V yelled as he walked past the door. We broke apart, me blushing bright red. Jungkook smirked at me before we went out into the lounge.

“Y/N and I are going out for a bit,” Jungkook said before picking up Mads. I giggled as he wrapped an arm around my waist as we went around Hokkaido. We went to see a few shops and we stopped at a couple of merchant tables.

 

The next few days were spent much the same; the guys and us went out to tour the town as well as went to the beaches. My bags were bursting with things that we purchased during our vacation. I only had one more day until Mads and my flight and I knew that Jungkook was planning something.

“Y/N, the hyungs agreed to watch Madeleine tonight,” Jungkook tugged nervously on his bracelet.

“Okay?” I questioned him.

“Wear something nice, but casual,” Jungkook stated before kissing me. “Be ready by seven okay?” I nodded and he left me alone.

By the time seven o’clock came around I was dressed and ready. I was wearing a nice dress with nice flats and my hair and makeup done lightly, but nicely. I spritzed myself with my favorite perfume, Jungkook loved it, and went into the lounge area where Jungkook was waiting. He was on his phone, but stood up once he saw that I was ready.

“Ready?” He asked. I hummed in response before kneeling down to kiss Madeleine on the forehead.

“Be good! No throwing parties! Catching the room on fire! No biting!” I called out to her as Jungkook literally drug me outside of the hotel. We stood in the cooler air of the evening.

“Where are we going?” I asked Jungkook as we started to walk.

“Oh I made plans for us,” he smirked before we hailed a cap. We went into the city and got a bite to eat at a local restaurant before Jungkook and I walked down to this beautiful pier. “Y/N you know how much I love you right?”

“Yes,” I was starting to get nervous. Was he going to say that he had cheated on me? Why was he saying this? Then it all made sense when he knelt down.

“I love you and Madeleine so much. I want to come home to you guys there always. I want to have kids of our own one-day Y/N,” Jungkook expressed, taking in a deep breath before pulling out a small box. He snapped open the lid and I saw a beautiful blooming rose engagement ring. I gasped. “Y/N will you please say yes? That you will marry me? That I can adopt Mads and officially be in her life?”

“You want to adopt Mads?” I gasped at my boyfriend who grinned. He nodded. I felt tears running down my cheeks as this became too overwhelming. I turned away for a moment, never seeing his grin falter. “Jungkook, I don’t know what to say.” I finally choked out, wiping at my face before turning around to see him.

“Say yes,” he implored me. Finally, I nodded and he brought me into a searing kiss. He slipped the ring onto my finger as we kissed.

“Oh my god. I’m going to be Mrs. Jeon!” I laughed a little hysterically as I realized that we were going to be married.

“I love you, Y/N,” Jungkook said hugging me to him. “I love you so much!”

“I love you too Jungkook. And yes you can adopt Mads after we’re married,” I grinned at him as he grinned crazily back. That was just start of our wonderful lives.

Chapter Text

A/N: I took this from my fanfic account. it was originally an HP oneshot, but thought that I could revamp it for BTS. I think it worked out lovely.

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/c6/67/57/c66757d6907fc91d7b3e7f0bf3ad9618--glasses-kim-namjoon.jpg

We know full well there’s just time

So is it wrong to toss this line?

If your heart was full of love,

Would you give it up?

It’s not about

Not about angels,

Angels.

My brother was especially concerned when I began to sleep a lot. We had left our families abusive household over eight years ago. The both of us had begun our new lives, he was the CEO of a large business and I had trained to become a nurse.

Lately though, I didn’t have the energy to do anything. My boss gave me two weeks off of work, for he said I looked a little peaky. Jin was concerned when I slept for the majority of my impromptu vacation. The final straw was when I woke up sweating and had a fever of 104 degrees. Jin booked no argument and took me to Seoul Hospital.

“How may I help you sir?” The receptionist asked pleasantly as Jin appeared holding me in his arms.

“I need a doctor to look at my sister. Aria seems like she has a infection.” She nodded and immediately had us placed into a room.

“Jin I’m fine!” I stressed to my older brother. “It’s just a little cold. I’ve been rundown for a while. I don’t even need to be here!”

“Well Aria, we are here now, so just lay down and let the Doctor do his job. If it is just a little cold then he’ll be able to get you the right potions.” Jin said in his no nonsense voice. I rolled my eyes and relaxed back onto the exam table.

“Fine. But they won’t find anything!” I shot back at my older brother, who just smirked. Then the door opened and the Doctor walked in.

“Miss Kim. What brings you in today?” The Doctor asked as he walked towards me.

“I haven’t felt so well.” I said in a soft voice. “Today I woke up sweating and with a fever.”

“She has been feeling tired for the past week and a half, sir,” my brother interjected. “Her boss at the clinic put her on leave for two weeks, and she has been sleeping the whole of her impromptu vacation.”

“Ok.” The Doctor said before he waved his hand. “I’m going to need to run some tests, one of which will involve me taking several tubes of blood. We’ll be able to figure out what this is soon enough.”

Two hours later, I had prodded and subjected to several long tests, when the Doctor finally came back with a folder full of papers. He was flicking through them, before he stopped on one of the tests. He hummed.

“Well Miss Kim, I’m afraid to say that it appears as though you have leukemia.” I felt my heart stop. I shared a look with my brother. His face was frozen in a look of shock. “I’m going to have to immediately schedule you for treatment. This is a serious disease, but one in which vigorous as well as aggressive treatment can usually put into remission.”

“Ok.” I said, my voice sounding as hollow as I felt. Jin squeezed my hand.

“We will immediately begin the treatments. Let me schedule you for Monday at two o’clock. Would that be alright?” I nodded. “I ask that every patient who comes in for their first few treatments bring a family member. I’d prefer it for all the treatments, though I do understand this isn’t possible. Do you have someone who can bring you?”

“I will.” Jin spoke up.

“Jin you have to work.” I protested. “Let me just ask Taehyung or even Jungkook would be willing - ”

“No. It should be me. I’ll speak with the COO. He should let me have the afternoon off.” Jin said with finality in his voice. “My sister will need a detailed Doctor’s prognosis to take to her boss. Can you have someone write one for her?”

“Yes, Mr. Kim. That shouldn’t be a problem.” The Doctor said before he wrote a note to inform one of the receptionists what he would need. “Now, Miss Kim, when you come in on Monday, go to floor six.”

“There is no floor six.” Jin said, leaning forward. My mind was still whirling so I was grateful that my brother had decided to take charge of this situation.
“Mr. Kim, let me assure you that there is indeed a level six here at Seoul Hospital. It usually isn’t for the general public, as it deals with terminal illnesses and cancers.” The Doctor turned back to me. “Go to floor six. The receptionist there will provide you with a room and the Doctor will be with you to begin the treatment. Alright?”

I nodded, my ears feeling like they were quite numb. The Doctor led us out of the examination room and to the receptionist desk where she handed me a thick book of papers. I took them from her and walked with my brother to the parking lot. We drove home in silence.

“Cancer?” Taehyung exclaimed over dinner. I nodded, poking at the mashed potatoes on my plate. “Oh my poor darling!”

“It’s fine, Tae.” I said, not looking up to see the pitying looks on our friends’ faces. “I’m done. I’m going to go to the garden. I need to clear my head.” With that I left the table and made my way to the beautiful spot by the lake where the flowers grew thick and bountiful.

“Aria.” Jimin’s voice came from behind me. I turned and ran into his open arms. “Oh, love, it’ll be ok.”

He stroked my hair as I cried my displeasure into the front of his t-shirt. He never looked on me pityingly, he loved to make me laugh. Jimin though, he had once asked me out on a date, never pushed to be more than he was in my life – a confidante, a best friend, a brother.

“Jimin!” I sobbed, feeling my heart break into little pieces. “I don’t want to have this!”

“Shhh. Aria, it’s ok.” He pulled me back from his shirt and began to gently wipe the tears away with this thumb. “As beautiful as ever.” I smiled a little. “C’mon, little sister. Everyone’s worried about you.”

With that he began to steer me towards the house. Along the way he told me encouraging things and even promised to take off a few days to come sit with me during my treatments. He just made me promise that I would alert him to when the times and dates were so that he would be able to ask for them off.

Monday dawned, bright and clear. I had a hard time sleeping that night, tossing and turning, before I finally got out of my warm bed and went downstairs to sit in the study where I read for a few hours until Jin woke up. He had to go to the office for a few hours, but he would meet me at the hospital at a quarter to two. This way he would be sure not to miss my appointment.

“Have a good day, Jin.” I smiled at my big brother. He dropped a kiss onto the top of my head.

“I’ll see you later, alright Aria?” I nodded, pushing the eggs around my plate. “Keep out of trouble. Your boss will receive these papers today. I’ll deliver them myself.”

“Thank you Jin.” I said as he left. I was left alone in the house with no one but my brother’s sugar gliders to talk to.

I was an emergency room nurse, and with my crazy schedule didn’t have many friends. I had work acquaintances and that was all. I didn’t have the time to go out all the time.

One-fifty hit and I was standing in the entrance to Seoul Hospital in a state of anxious. I was wringing my hands and pacing back and forth. Finally my brother came in at a fast pace.

“Sorry I’m late, sis. I had to excuse myself from a meeting.” I nodded before I clutched his hand in mine. “Come on. Let’s not be late, love.”

“You must be Miss Kim. You have a two o’clock appointment?” The receptionist asked as we stepped out of the elevator onto the sixth floor. I nodded and she gave me a smile before stepping out from behind the desk and waving me back a corridor.

“This way please.” She said. I followed her nervous. “Your brother is going to accompany you?” I nodded.

“For as long as he is able. I also have other family members who will be willing to come and sit with me, whenever Jin isn’t able.” I said as we stepped into a disinfected white room.

“Mr. Kim, will you please wait outside, until your sister has put on her gown?” Jin nodded, and I walked in and put on the vomit green gown. I shivered as I walked across the floor and opened it. The receptionist gave me a smile and motioned Jin into the room.

“Miss Kim, the Doctor will be in shortly to see you.” I nodded and sat down on the exam table. My brother sat in one of the plastic chairs and tapped nervously on the arms of the chair. He noticed my violent shivers and muttered a warming charm. I instantly felt warmer.

“Thanks Jin.” He waved it off.

“It’s nothing.” Just then the door opened to reveal the Doctor. I gasped as the Doctor’s face came into view. It was Kim Namjoon.

“Hello, Miss Kim.” He said in a pleasant, professional tone. Jin looked up at his voice.

“Namjoon?” He was incredulous.

“Ah, Mr. Kim. Yes, I am Namjoon as you so eloquently put it.” Namjoon said. I felt my hands begin to sweat as I remember the crush I had on Namjoon for several years. Hoseok and even Jungkook had teased me for ages about my taste in men. Then I had dated Oh Sehun after the war, which ended in disaster. Jin had gotten involved in that relationship.

“Miss Kim you are here today to begin your treatments for Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia, am I correct?” He asked. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. “Don’t worry, darling. It’ll be alright.”

“I’m going to have to insert an intravenous line into your chest cavity. This will be where all the treatments are done. You cannot, I repeat, cannot take this out.” Namjoon gave me a serious look. I nodded, twisting my hands. “This will be a permanent fixture. I have others that like to call it a pick line.”

“How permanent?” Jin asked, leaning forward. Namjoon turned towards him.

“Only until the treatments have ceased.” Namjoon said. He brought out a box, and began to gather the equipment he needed. I gulped and looked at Jin horrified.

“Is it alright if I stand beside her?” Jin asked, noticing my horrified expression. “She dislikes needles.”

“That’s fine.” Namjoon said, before emerging from the corner with the needle. I gulped. “Lay back for me, Miss Kim.” I complied and held onto Jin’s hand. I looked at the white wall and tried not to focus on Namjoon’s warm hand probing along my chest. “I’m just trying to find the vein. I won’t be too long.”

“Ow!” I yelped as I felt the sting and then felt the cold adhesive taping the line down. Finally the whole procedure was over and Namjoon helped me sit up.

“Now for the really unpleasant part.” Namjoon muttered before he put the IV line into the pick.

I jumped as I felt the medicine begin to flow. He sent me a sympathetic look before he sat down on the chair in the corner. I was confused and I know Jin was as well.

“I like to stay for the first treatment to ensure that my patient’s will react positively to the treatment.” Namjoon said with a faint smile. I nodded, and sat there while the medicine creeped into my veins.

An hour later and I was done. Namjoon unhooked the IV line from the port and placed a plastic cover over the entire port. He hummed as he threw away the IV bag.

“Come in right away if the port becomes infected. You already have a compromised immune system and this could prove to be life threatening if you do not seek immediate medical treatment.” Namjoon said. “Here’s my card. If you have any problems at all, I want a call. I don’t care if it’s in the middle of the night, during my day’s off, I still want to have a call.”

Jin nodded. “What can I expect?” Namjoon looked at me thoughtfully.

“Nausea, vomiting, lack of appetite. The worrying thing to be concerned about is if she has a nosebleed. I need notified immediately.” Namjoon said. “I’ll see you Wednesday, same time, alright Miss Kim?”

“Alright,” I said, suppressing a yawn. “Call me Aria, Doctor.”

“Very well Aria. I will see you in two days.” Namjoon left the room.

“You alright?” Jin asked me. I nodded, feeling a little shaky.

“Yeah.” I nodded. “I think so.” He got up.

“Let me go. I’ll be out in the hallway, get dressed.” Jin left and I was sitting on the table. It took me a few moments to gather my strength and get up to put my clothes on. Finally I was done, and opened the door. Jin helped me down the hallway where we spoke to the receptionist who wrote down the next appointment date.

 

Three weeks later and the treatments were getting worse. Namjoon made sure that he left a bucket for me. I sicked up often now throughout the whole treatment. He was nice to me and Jin, always making sure that I was fine. He would check in more times than was necessary.

“JIN!” I screamed, one morning as I ran a brush through my hair. He clambered up the flight of stairs in our house and stood panting in my doorway. I brandished the object that caused my horror.

“Aria, Doctor Namjoon said that this was normal.” Jin said, gently as he took the clump of hair from my hand. I was pale, with dark rings underneath my eyes. I had lost at least four kilos since the beginning of treatments and was always cold. “It’s alright.”

“I hate this!” I yelled. He jumped. “I hate this! Haven’t the both of us paid for enough in our lives! Can’t I just be normal?”

“Shh.” Jin grabbed me and pulled me into his chest. “It’s alright, love.”

 

Seven months later and my brother had to call Namjoon on more than one occasion, but this time was the worst. He found me lying beside my bed, blood pouring out of my nose. They admitted me to the hospital that night. I have been there for over a week, not getting any better.

“I think we have to start more aggressive treatment.” Namjoon said as he stood in my room.

“No.” I said softly. “I won’t – can’t do anymore.” I said weakly. It was hard for me to even get out of bed at this time. All of my hair had fallen out by now.

“Aria!” Jin snarled. “You can’t!”

“I can. Jin this is my decision. I wouldn’t be able to go through any more treatments.” I said calmly. Jin’s eyes filled with tears.

“You can’t leave me.” Jin said softly, grabbing hold of my hand.

“Jin, you have Jungkook and everyone else. It’s time for me.” I said, softly. “I should have died that day eight years ago.”

“I have to go.” Jin said abruptly, and he took off out of the room. I looked up at Namjoon. Namjoon’s eyes were shining with tears as well.

“Aria, please reconsider.” He begged me. “I think you would do well. A few more treatments. A bone marrow transplant. There are other options.” I shook my head.

“Joonie I’m tired. I’m tired and cold. I am done.” I said with a tear trailing down my cheek. He stepped next to my bed and wiped it off my cheek with tender fingers.

“I need you.” Joonie said with a sad smile. “I need you to continue. I want to take you out to our first date, kiss you, propose to you, marry you, and be the father to our children. Please Aria.” I closed my eyes. I took a deep breath before I nodded.

“Fine. But if I get worse . . .” I let it hang. Namjoon nodded at me.

“I need to go inform your brother.” Namjoon said, before leaving the room. I sighed and sank back onto my bed.

 

“A bone marrow transplant.” The Head Doctor walked into the room. “Aria Kim?” I nodded. “We have found a match. We will schedule the transplant in a week’s time. Namjoon, monitor her closely. She needs to be healthy.”

Namjoon nodded and sat down by my bed. I had to remain in the hospital for the next week until I received the bone marrow transplant and then for a few weeks at the very least to ensure that the transplant had taken. That my body wouldn’t reject the transplant.

Jin and Joon stayed with me for the entire duration of the procedure. They saw me as soon as I came out of the surgery, though they had wear a protective shield in order to not infect me, and then they visited every single day.

One day I woke up and felt hot. My whole body felt like it was going to boil over, so I quickly called a Doctor. She came into my room and took my temperature before alerting the Doctor who had performed the transplant. I was quickly moved to another room, where I had to fight for my life.

I remember feeling disassociated from my own body. I hated the way that I felt, but I remember feeling a cool flannel brushing across my forehead as well as the comforting voices of Joonie and Jin. Once I think I heard Jimin as well.

“Water?” I croaked when I cracked open my eyelids. A hand quickly pushed a cup by my lips. I took a drink, and enjoyed the feeling of the cool water caressing my throat.

“How are you feeling?” Joonie asked, after the cup of water had been pulled away.

“Tired.” I muttered, feeling exhausted. I felt like I had just run a marathon, and then climbed Mount Everest.

“Oh, love.” Jin said, sitting beside me on the bed. I smiled up at my brother.

“Did it work?” I asked, wanting the transplant to have worked. Jin nodded.

“So far. You’ve only had a mild infection, which they quickly took care of.” He carded his fingers through my hair.

“When can I come home?” I asked, anxious to return home.

“They say in a week’s time if you stay alert that we can take you home,” Joon said, gripping my hand with his own.

“Thank God.” I breathed. I felt a tremendous amount of pressure lifted from my whole body. He laughed, before rubbing circles on the back of my hand.

“I cannot wait for you to start feeling better.” Jin smirked at me. “Jungkook has missed you. He constantly reminds me of this fact. In fact, tomorrow I will bring you some of the brownies Jungkook has fondly made for you.” Jin rolled his eyes. I shook my head at him.

“Just because the maknae likes me better, doesn’t mean anything!” I snapped playfully at my big brother. He smirked.

 

A week later and I was finally being released. The doctor took my blood tests for the past few days and made sure that my white blood cells and red blood cells were fine. They took out the port and let me go home.

“Welcome home!” All of my brother’s friends cheered when Jin and Joon brought me into the house. I grinned as I looked at all the people surrounding me.

“I brought some of my friends as well.” Joonie said into my ear as he wrapped the blanket a little more securely around my legs. He pushed the wheelchair into the parlor, where I was quickly surrounded by the members of our extended family.

“I’m glad that you are finally home.” Jimin said to me, handing me a cup of punch. I smiled at my future brother-in-law. I had no doubt that Jin would propose to him in the future. They both loved one another very much, but he had a commitment right now to a dance team.

“Me too, Chim. Me too.” I said, sipping on the too sweet liquid.

“Hey, love!” Taehyung knelt down in front of me.

“Is this a proposal this time Taehyung?” I asked teasingly, squeezing Joon’s hand.

“Ha!” He laughed heartily. “We all know that you would never consider it. Welcome home!” Tae pecked me on the cheek before getting up and walking over to talk with Jin.

“Hey, Aria.” Startled I looked up to see the familiar face of Min Yoongi.

“Yoongi-ssi.” I said cautiously.

“Joon invited me. Is that alright?” He asked. “If it’s not I can leave.” He turned to go when I didn’t say anything, but I grabbed a hold of his hand.

“No. Don’t go.” I said. He turned back around and gave me an incredulous look.

“Why?”

“Because we all deserve another chance.” I said to him. “Plus you were exonerated of all crimes due to the testimony both my brother and I gave. You are more than welcome here.”

“Thank you, Aria.” Yoongi said. “So how are you doing? Namjoon said it was a long and hard battle.”

“I’m doing better, thanks for asking.” I said with a slight smile. “If it wasn’t for Joonie and Jin, I would have given up long before.”

“I’m glad you didn’t give up Aria.” Yoongi said before he pulled out a thin package out of his bag. “Here.”

I opened it to reveal a beautiful scarf. I had taken to wearing one wrapped around my head in an effort to hide the fact that I had lost my hair. It didn’t really matter as I lost all the hair on my body, including my eyebrows but it was the thought really.

“Thank you Yoongi.” I said, running my hand over the beautiful, soft silk. It was a beautiful blue, with little diamonds and crystals sewn into the fabric in the shape of butterflies. “It’s beautiful.”

“Hey, all I did was pick it up.” Yoongi smirked at me, stuffing his hands into his pockets. I laughed.

“Well you did an excellent job.” I said, before Jin approached us.

“Min.” He said, his posture tense. I rolled my eyes at his theatrics. I knew he had forgiven Min when he gave the testimony.

“Jin. Be nice.” I admonished my elder brother. He gave me a soft smile before turning back to look at Yoongi.

“It is nice of you to come.” Jin finally said. He stuck his hand out for Yoongi to shake. Yoongi took it, though hesitantly. I watched proudly, it was a nice start to their tolerance of each other. “Aria, are you hungry?”

“Not really.” I replied, missing my brother and boyfriend’s concerned glances. “I’m actually kind of tired.” Joonie wheeled me to the couch, where he helped me sit on the cushions.

Jin brought over a couple of thick blankets. He wrapped one around my torso and then tucked the other blanket around my legs. Jungkook appeared with a bowl of soup and a cup of hot chocolate. He took the glass of punch from me and disappeared.

“Smells delicious,” Joonie said, setting the bowl on a tray and placing it onto my lap. I smiled at him weakly.

“Yeah,” I echoed hollowly, not really feeling hungry. But I would try to eat the soup for I knew it was time for me to eat. I managed a few spoon-fuls of the beef soup. I handed the tray to Joonie who took it and drank a few sips of my hot chocolate before I fell asleep on the sofa.

 

For the next two months I was more or less confined to the mansion. Jooniedore and Jin would try to stay with me as much as they were able. Some days Yoongi would come and sit with me. He would sometimes read me a chapter out of a book. His favorite was poetry, and his voice would lull me to sleep.

I know Jin would never say it but he was grateful for Yoongi coming and keeping me company. He hated leaving me alone, but I refused to let him take any more time off of work, especially when I was getting better. The doctor’s appointment would be in another month, which would let us know whether or not the transplant actually worked.

I was still tired, nauseated, pale, and much too cold. My hair was beginning to grow again, I had fuzz on the top of my head. Yoongi would laugh at me and say that I looked like a dark peach.

I always scowled at him, and refused to listen to him until he apologized for his words. He always did, but with a slight bump on my nose as he did it. Joonie always tried to reassure me that he couldn’t care less that my hair was slowly growing.

Joonie had made me several romantic dinners; my brother would go out with Jimin or stay in his room. It was surprisingly nice, to be able to have a sense of normalcy. I wasn’t allowed out in the general population for a while, yet, but Joonie tried to make our ‘dates’ happen.

Taehyung and Hoseok would also come over and spend time with me. Tae would regale me with tales about the fashion industry and Hoseok would tell me some of the stories about the things him and Jimin got up to on their dance teams. I loved that they could take some time out of their day to keep my spirits up.

I also had a serious talk with Jimin about his relationship with my brother. I told him that I was pleased that the two of them were so serious. I also told him that I would be supportive if they decided to get married. Jimin cried, before telling me that I would be there – and not to talk as if I were dying.

For you see, even though everyone else thought that the bone marrow transplant had worked, my being knew something still wasn’t right. I knew that the transplant hadn’t worked and that by the time they figured that out, the cancer would have progressed too far for the Doctors to counteract it.

I wrote out my will during the times that I was alone, and contacted my lawyer so he could finalize it. In my nightstand there was a stack of letters sealed, waiting for the individuals to find them and read them after I was gone. I also sent a detailed list of instructions to the lawyer, for my funeral. I was satisfied with my preparations and knew that I needed to do nothing else for the time being.

A week before my appointment with the Doctor, I was walking down the stairs to join the rest of the family for dinner, when my nose began to bleed profusely. I cried out and the whole family ran as fast as they could. Joonie was there, pressing a handkerchief to my nose, tipping my head back and guiding me down the stairs.

“Seoul Hospital.” Jin said, his voice like steel. I winced as I was steered towards the garage.

“I love you all.” I said with a smile, knowing that this was the last time I would see them all.

“Love you too,” Hoseok said. “We’ll see you when you get out of the hospital, ok?” I nodded, though I knew that wouldn’t happen. I was resigned to my fate and made peace with it two months ago.

 

“What do you mean there’s nothing you can do?” Jin yelled. I winced from the bed I was lying on, the machines beeping around me.

“Mr. Kim, please, calm down.” The Doctor said in a soothing voice.

“CALM DOWN? Don’t tell me to bloody calm down!” Jin shouted. I knew his temper would be difficult for him to accept the reality. “You need to do something! My sister is dying!”

“Mr. Kim, the cancer has spread too rapidly. We did warn that the bone marrow transplant wasn’t foolproof.” The Doctor tried again.

“Jin, come on.” Joonie said, making me grin. He would be able to keep my brother calm. In a few moments the both of the men in my life came through the door to my room. “Aria. How are you?”

“Fine.” I said, struggling to sit upright.

“How can you be fine? Did you hear?” Jin interrupted.

“Yes, Jin. I know. I’m going to die.” I said, keeping eye contact with him. His eye’s sharpened with clarity.

“You knew, didn’t you?” Jin asked. I nodded. “You didn’t even go to the doctor once did you?”

“No.” I said, blinking tiredly. “Of course I didn’t go to the doctor, due to the fact that I knew that it would be too late. They can’t give me chemo for a few more weeks anyway, once they are sure that the bone marrow transplant didn’t take. By then it would be too late. Apparently it already is.”

“The Doctors have given you two weeks.” Joonie said, running a hand through his dyed blue hair.

“It’s alright.” I said. “I’ve come to terms with this already.”

 

Two weeks later and I was breathing through a tube. I was tired, my whole body ached, and I wanted to go. I was saddened that I would have to wait for Joonie, but I was calm.

“Joonie.” I breathed out. I was so cold now. Jin had brought me back home, so that I could rest at home. The nurses came six times a day to check up on me.

“Aria.” He put down the book he was reading. He didn’t want to leave me for a moment, so he would sleep in the armchair, and stay with me twenty-four seven.

“I want you to promise me.” I wheezed out.

“Promise you what?”

“Promise me . . . that you will . . move on.” I said, my chest hurting as I got my sentence out. I saw one silvery tear make its way down his cheek.

“Aria,” He shook his head wordlessly.

“Joonie. Promise me!” I burst out. He nodded, another tear making its way down his face.

“Aria, I love you. I’ve loved you since fifth year, when I was too busy being angry at your brother.” He pressed a soft kiss to my lips, before lowering his head onto the bed. Hot tears soaked into the blankets as I lifted my thin hand and ran it through his chocolate brown hair.

My eyelids were closing, and I knew it was time as I felt his silky smooth blue hair between my fingers. I saw my mom with her red hair and green eyes. My dad with his unkempt black hair, so alike Jin’s. They all held their hand’s out to me and with a last breath I took it.

 

Joonie felt her hand still on his head. He pulled his head up and wiped at his face. His chest clenched when he saw her blue tinged lips, her peaceful expression, and her chest not moving with her respirations. The tears fell rapidly as he gathered his girlfriend into his arms and crushed her to his chest.

A low keening sound filled the room, filtered down the hall, and down the stairs. Kim Seokjin stood up and raced up the stairs. He fell to his knees at the sight he saw – Kim Namjoon holding his too still, too pale sister. The sister who was taken from him too soon.

 

Four days later and the friends and family, as well as the press were gathered in the park. Jin erected a headstone for his sister, and threw some of her ashes onto the grave. He then offered the urn to Joonie who spread the rest of them, tears flowing and mixing with the grey ash.

Here lies

Aria Lily Kim

1981-2002

“It might be that to surrender to

happiness was to accept defeat,

but it was a defeat better

than many victories.”

~ Aria Kim and W. Somerset Maugham

 

 

 

Chapter Text

A/N: A crossover between Supernatural, Sherlock Holmes, and BTS, but not needed to watch Supernatural. Not really a crossover either. Please read and enjoy.

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I was born to parents Mary and John Winchester. I was born a year and three months after my big brother Dean. Then a little over two years later we welcomed the youngest Winchester to the family – Sam.

Six months later Mom was killed in a tragic nursery fire. It would be another eight years before I would learn the truth. The truth behind Mom's death and our father's frequent, unexplained absences. Dean became more of a father to Sam and I, as he was constantly around.

Dad trained us from the time we turned five years of age. We were pushed to build our strength from exercises like running, push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups, and fighting techniques. When I turned ten, Dad allowed me to learn how to properly shoot a gun.

I accompanied Dad and Dean on several cases when I turned fifteen, much to the displeasure of my younger brother Sam. Sam left for college when I was twenty years old, about to turn twenty-one. Dad and Sam had a huge fight, in which ended with Sammy walking out the door promising never to come back again.

It would be another four years before Dean and I would be reunited with our brother, who was attempting to achieve his dream of finishing his law degree. Dean and I broke into his apartment where he was staying with his girlfriend named Jessica. We dragged him off to find Dad, taking down a lady in white.

When we got back and dropped Sam back off, Dean and I immediately noticed something was wrong and went back to collect Sam. The demon that killed Mom had struck again, this time going after Sam's girlfriend. We couldn't find a trail so we left.

I trailed around after my brothers for three years. Then Dean made a deal with a crossroads demon to get Sam back. Dean's time was up a year later. Sam and I split up, him going his own way with Ruby and I went to Bobby's initially.

"Lia!" Bobby yelled at me one morning when I awoke, hungover. I startled and a bottle crashed close to my feet.

"What is it Bobby?" I blinked, trying to block the sun with my hands. He snorted.

"I have a case for you." Bobby replied.

"I'm not doing anymore." I frowned up at him, squinting. He just shook his head.

"This isn't what Dean would want for you." Bobby said. I had to blink against the sudden tears. That had been a low blow, even for Bobby to use against me. "Anyway, Garth called. Told me about a friend of his in Korea who thinks that he might be dealing with some demonic possessions. I told Gar that I could find someone."

"Good. Go find someone." I said, returning my head to the desk.

"I have. Get up." Bobby walked around the table and heaved me to my feet. "Go get a shower. I've got your things packed. Plane leaves in six hours." With that Bobby left me on my own directly in front of the stairs.

By the time that I had a shower, brushed my hair, and teeth I was mostly sober. I thundered down the stairs and met Bobby in the kitchen where he placed a plate of eggs and bacon in front of me. I ate and then left for the airport.

I made my way through security. Which was amazing. I would have thought that my face would have made the watch list, but I suppose not. Sitting in my seat I looked down at my passport and saw that I was now Rose deYoung. I had to snort. Good old Bobby keeping my brother's tradition continuing.

I made my way out of Incheon International and found a cabby. I contacted Garth who got me situated in a motel in a sleazy part of town. At least I was used to it by now, though clearly out of my area. At least the one good thing about being a Winchester, you knew how to talk your way into and out of situations. I set up the police scanner and listened all night for any sign of a new murder, but I ended up falling asleep at about six in the morning.

I awoke to my phone ringing. Annoyed, I snatched it quickly from the nightstand and answered it. A thick Asian accent filled my ear.

" 'Ello luv."

"Who the hell is this?" I rolled out of bed, still fully clothed. I quickly slipped on my boots.

"I'm Garth's friend. Ya know, the one that need the 'elp?"

"Ok?" I slid my jacket on and slipped my gun into the back of my jeans.

"I'm Minho luv," he sounded so cheerful; so unlike the other hunters I've encountered.

"Don't call me luv!" I snapped back at him, annoyed that my sleep was disturbed. He merely chuckled.

"Meet me at Minji's café." He gave me directions and I showed up to meet him half an hour later. I stood in the door, just waiting and looking for a guy to match his voice. Unfortunately, the guy I had picked out wasn't the guy. Wasn't even close.

"Helia?" A young kid at the back of the shop waved to me. I made my way over and stared at the hunter in front of me.

This hunter was about sixteen with bad acne and a baby face. I appraised him. Obviously this kid hadn't been in this field of work for long as he was still way too cheerful. An amateur. And obviously an innocent.

"You're Minho?" I asked incredulously as I took a seat. He nodded a bit, still a little too enthusiastically for my liking.

"Yeah. And you are Helia Winchester right?" A waitress came over and handed me a menu.

"Yeah." I looked the menu over before I chose a cup of coffee, black and a side of rice. The waitress came back over and took my order.

"I didn't expect to get someone this good." Minho said staring at me in adoration.

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

"Well I've heard how good the Winchesters are. When I contacted Garth I expected him or one of his friends." Minho made my family out to be heroes.

"Minho, I'm not a hero. Neither are any of my family."

"No. You're a legend." I almost choked on my coffee.

"A legend?"

"Yeah. A legend."

"What can you tell me about this case?" I quickly changed the subject.

"Here." He slid me a folder. Absently eating, I began to look through the contents. Obviously a murder, which resulted in the death of a young woman.

Her body had been ripped to shreds. Blood was everywhere with a symbol clearly drawn on the floor. A Z. I remembered Sam, Dean, and I had a case similar. I looked through the newspaper clippings as well as the rest of the file.

"Alright. Where's the body being kept?"

We made it to Seoul Hospital where I strode through the hallways coming into contact with a young male mortician.

"Ma'am you cannot be back here." He hurried after me.

"Actually I can Mr. - "

"Park. Park Jimin." I pushed through the morgue's doors.

"Agent deYoung, Mr. Park." I twirled to face him, flashing my badge. "I'm sure you'll find that I'm very qualified to be here."

"Apologies." Mr. Park appeared flustered. "What did you need?"

"I would like to exam and see the body of Miss Martin." I said turning and striding inside the room. I met the eyes of three men. One was tall, dark, and clearly arrogant. The other two were older looking in their late thirties or early forties.

"Who are you?" One of the older gentlemen asked as Molly motioned to the table. I took a pair of gloves and snapped them on.

"Agent deYoung." I repeated before I turned to focus on my task at hand. Looking at the body laid out on the table.

"Agent deYoung?" The man who spoke prior repeated raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah. Is that a problem?" I raised an eyebrow in response.

"Can I see your identification?" I rolled my eyes at this brainless request.

"If I get it out of my pocket I'll have contaminated my gloves." I shot back. "Minho." Minho came to my side and looked at me expectantly. "Get my ID out of my jacket pocket." He reached into my leather jacket and withdrew the badge to show to the demanding man.

I looked at the body. She was young, about twenty-four years old. This young girl had clearly been dismembered, and quite violently. Looking her over I stopped when I reached her chest. Very carefully, I put a finger in each side of the hole and peered in. Empty.

I stood back and pulled my gloves off. Turning away I walked a few paces, trying desperately to think. The lunar cycle wasn't right so clearly it wasn't a werewolf. I really hoped it wasn't what I thought it was.

"I'm Detective Kim Seokjin." The demanding man interrupted my train of thought. I turned and shook his hand. "So . . . . uh, what brings you to Seoul?"

"This case." I gave him a smile. "My supervisor, Willis, informed me of the situation. We think this case could be connected to another string of serial murders that occurred in Chicago a few years back."

"Really?" Seokjin asked. "So you never caught the killer?"

"No." I tightened my jaw.

"Interesting agent." The tall, dark, and curly haired man stated. He had a deep voice.

"Well I'm a field agent." I gave him a tight-lipped smile. I was wearing a pair of tight black jeans, a cropped ACDC t-shirt, black heeled boots, my leather jacket, and of course my arsenal.

"Hello. I'm Dr. Kim Taehyung." The other shorter man introduced himself. "This is my colleague, Jeon Jungkook." I shook Dr. Kim's hand.

"Pleasure." My phone began to ring – Another Brick in the Wall. "Hello?" It was Sam.

"How's Seoul?" I could hear the smile in his voice. I just scowled.

"Oh shut up." He laughed heartily. "Yeah so do you remember our Chicago case three years ago?"

"Of course I do. Why?" Sam sounded concerned.

"Because that's what I'm facing in Seoul." I was being mindful of the others in the room. "Anyway you taking care of The Baby?"

"You know I am." Sam caught on. "Look I'll call Bobby. Get any information for you I can."

"Thanks. Text you later." I snapped the phone shut. "Anyway. Mr. Park!" He scuttled to my side.

"Y-y-yes." He stuttered.

"I need the autopsy report as well as any information you may have for Miss Martin." I took off the gloves and threw them into a garbage can. "Same for you Detective. I'll stop by the National Crime Investigation headquarters later to pick up the file."

Detective Kim nodded at me. I held out my hand expectantly. He handed me back my badge. I tucked it into my pocket before leaving the morgue. Jimin gave me a file. I nodded at her and left, Minho following in my wake.

We went to an American restaurant where I ordered fries, and a bacon chicken ranch sandwich. When it came I pulled the bun off and began to eat. Minho sat there drinking his tea and eating his fish.

"So Minho, want to tell me why you got into this lifestyle?" I asked the teenager.

"Uh, well, my Mum and Da both died when I was thirteen. I was sent to live with my uncle up in Ireland. He was a hunter. Started teaching me when I was sixteen." I narrowed my eyes at him.

"So you're a novice?" I asked, sitting back. He nodded.

"Yes'm. I'm nineteen. My uncle died last year." I had sympathy as Daddy died three years back and Dean just barely a month and a half ago. But I couldn't tolerate his idiocy.

"Minho why are you in this line of work?" I asked again, staring at him. It was clear he wasn't happy or content to do this work. He looked confused at my line of questioning until my next sentence. "This isn't obviously something you enjoy."

"Well my uncle wanted me to take it up." Minho admitted playing with his fingers.

"Well don't." I snapped at him. "Go to university or college or whatever it is they call it here. Go get a degree in something you want. This job scars you Minho. Don't do it." Minho was startled at my blunt honesty. "Trust me. Get out now." I gave him a quick kiss on the forehead and headed back to my motel.

"Hello?" I gave my brother some credit. He was good when it came to research.

"Yeah. I think it's a Daeava. As you said - "

"The same thing we faced in Chicago." I finished for Sam.

"Yeah." Sam agreed. "This is a dangerous gig."

"I'll be fine." I disagreed with him, as usual. Always being the stubborn one, even though I knew it was dangerous as well. I just didn't want Sammy to worry about me and do something stupid on his job. He sighed.

"At least you have what's-his-name with you." Silence was definitely deafening. "What happened Helia?"

"Well he's about twelve and inexperienced." I defended my actions. "I just gave him some advice. He's an innocent Sam."

"Oh God." Sam moaned. I looked at the time. 2:34 P.M.

"Oh, gotta go Sammy. Talk to you later kk?" I hung up on my adorable yet idiotic little brother. I went to Kim's office and looked through the file. Now all I have to do is try to find the one who could summon something as powerful and ancient as a Daeava. Finally I had to contact Seokjin who gave me a phone number to a guy about the request I had.

I called and made an appointment for tomorrow morning at 11. I fell into a sleep and woke up at about four-thirty after having a bad nightmare. I grabbed Dean's shorts, Sam's hoody, tennis shoes and my iPod and began my run of the day. I got back in at eight and took a shower.

I pulled on a pair of leather pants, my boots, a Metallica cropped tank and threw on Dean's brown leather jacket. Then I watched television for a couple of hours before I had to leave.

I made it to the building which was huge and built of white rock, it appeared. Waltzing in I walked up to the receptionist who told me to take a seat. I did so, tapping my fingers in an ACDC rhythm until I was called.

"Sir?" A large wooden door was pushed open by the tall guy who escorted me down the hall. I looked at the man in the nice three-piece suit, blue tie, slim figure, and scowl prominent on his face. He didn't even look up.

"Thank you Namjoon." The receptionist closed the door and left me standing there. "Please have a seat." He still didn't look up at me, which I found to be a little disconcerting. I took the plush leather seat he had indicated and kicked my leg restlessly.

"How may I help you?" He finally raised his head, exposing his severe features and icy eyes. This was a man I never would see myself having a relationship with; his life was ordered and stable, whilst mine was chaotic and could fall down around me at any point in time.

"Detective Seokjin Kim sent me your way sir." I replied, being as respectful to him as I would have been with my father. "I need your assistance with some street cameras."

"Continue." This man leaned forward interested and clasped his hands. Four hours later and equipped with a couple of copies, I had found what I was looking for.

Locating the man in the cameras was easy. All I had to do now, was locate the altar and destroy it. Therefore ending the Daeava's hold over this man and hopefully preventing more needless murders for the foreseeable future.

I tailed the man to find out the location of the altar. A run-down warehouse just off the Han River. I waited until he had vacated the building and then I broke in. Everything was as I expected. Zoroastrian symbols were everywhere.

I won't even begin to describe the disturbing features that were being used to bind and control the Daeava. I just knew I had to get out of there and quickly without drawing the Daeava's attention to me, which would prove fatal.

The man who was or rather through he was in control of the Daeava came back in. He took one look at me before sputtering with ill-concealed rage.

"Mr. Oh, please calm down!" I begged him. He rushed at me, sending me flying backwards. I flew into the altar, effectively smashing it, but also ruining my clothes.

I groaned feeling a little disoriented when the two guys from the morgue – Dr. Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook – came in. They did a double take seeing me on the floor, but trained their guns and sights on Sehun.

"Sehun, look I'm just trying to help you." I ground out, sitting up and concealing my pain, by gritting my teeth.

"How can you help me?" He cried looking at me.

"By stopping you while you're ahead!" I retorted standing up off the hard ground, but feeling the bruises begin to form.

"I'm fine!" He snapped. "In fact I'm more powerful than all of you!"

"You mean more stupid?" I raised an eyebrow at the imbecile in front of me.

"You don't know anything!" He yelled at me. I stepped closer to Sehun, making Jungkook and Taehyung be more vigilant.

"I know how dangerous this game is that you're playing." I said softly, keeping my hands spread out at my side.

"What do you mean?" He sounded confused. "It does my bidding!"

"And it's like a prehistoric pitbull!" I retorted. "It will bite that hand that feeds it, so to speak. Or rather any part of you that it can sink its teeth and claws into. These are dangerous, very dangerous, creatures to mess around with Seamus." I tried to look around, see if I could locate the demon, but it conceals itself cleverly in the shadows.

"It's mine!" Sehun roared at me. "It does what I want!"

"Sehun listen to me and don't be delusional. A Daeava isn't something a regular person, like you and I, can control." I tried to be calm about this whole situation.

"A Daeava?" Jungkook asked, slightly lowering his weapon.

"I'll explain later." I told him. "Sehun, listen to me – really hear me out. This creature is several millennia years old."

Sehun glared at me. Then he began to chant. I felt my stomach twist into an uneasy knot. I knew what he was doing. Summoning the Daeava.

"Sehun, these are highly volatile and ancient creatures!" I warned him. Because I knew that the creature would come for him. The altar was destroyed and Seamus was standing in the middle of the summoning circle he used.

"We need to leave! Now!" I pushed Taehyung and Jungkook backwards towards the door. We made it out just as Sehun began screaming. Looking back I saw the Daeava was devouring Sehun. I saw Taehyung and Jungkook look behind them as well before we all took off running.

Thankfully we weren't followed by the Daeava, so I went with the guys to Cheongdong Street. There we all sat down, the men with tea and I with my coffee. I patiently waited for the questions to begin.

"What in the bloody hell was that?" Taehyung demanded, sipping his tea. I got up from the couch and perched on the edge of the table, so I might be nearer to them both.

"That was a Daeava." I told Taehyung. Jungkook narrowed his light brown eyes at me.

"I gathered that much!" Taehyung snapped. I paid him no mind, after all he had every right to be freaking out. He had just discovered and experienced a supernatural experience, with a world he thought didn't even exist.

"A Daeava is a demon of Darkness." I calmly said.

"A demon?" Jungkook was giving me an intense stare now. I nodded at him. "Demon's aren't real!" Jungkook shouted. I calmly waited out his tantrum.

"Obviously they are. You all saw what happened to Sehun." I stated, giving him my piercing gaze. I took to telling them about my past, my father, my brothers, and all the creatures we had successfully hunted in the past twenty-five years.

"That had to have been a trick of some sort." Jungkook shook his head after I had finished all of that. He took in my history without so much of a blink, but was still hung up over the Daeava. He would never cease to amaze me.

"Jungkook what do you think killed Sehun then?" I asked calmly, sipping on my coffee, which had long since grown cold. I grimaced at the taste, but didn't want to fall asleep tonight, so I continued to drink it, I needed the caffeine.

"I don't know!" He almost yelled. I recoiled a little; yelling had preceded an important aspect of my childhood, so I suppose it was conditioned behavior now. Taehyung gave me a sympathetic glance, which I ignored. I didn't want to be pitied.

"Jungkook!" Taehyung admonished. They shared a look, which I took to be their way of communicating. Faintly, I wondered if they were a couple. I didn't want to bring it up in case I managed to embarrass them or else they weren't a couple. I just say upright and set my empty cup down.

"Well I must get going." I said to them both, rising from my seat.

"Wait!" Jungkook called out in that deep voice of his. "I didn't mean to discredit you or make you feel uncomfortable."

Jungkook was the one whom was clearly uncomfortable. I just laughed and patted him on the arm. He really had no idea about human nature that much was obvious.

"Really Jungkook, I'm fine. I just had a long day so I'm going back to my motel." I answered him. He scoffed at my answer.

"You aren't returning there to sleep." He stated. Taehyung just gaped at his roommate, or rather flatmate. I don't know why, Jungkook had obviously done this to people before.

"Jungkook, don't go analyzing her!" Taehyung sounded scandalized. Though probably not because he was analyzing me, but more because he had just reprimanded him making me feel uncomfortable. I merely chuckled. What was that adage again? Can't teach an old dog new tricks? Yeah, I think that fit Jeon Jungkook, nicely.

"Why could you say that?" Of course Jungkook was correct, I just wanted to know how he had arrived at his deduction. If I was that easy to read, or if it was something little only he would notice.

"A person planning to sleep the night would not have just guzzled down their coffee in the manner in which you did." He looked at me with those cold eyes. "You even went so far as to drink your coffee cold, which is obviously disgusting, even if I hadn't noticed your facial expression as you drank it. You also have dark circles underneath your eyes which didn't appear from just one night of lack of sleep. Therefore you must be haunted by nightmares or memories of past hunts and of your past."

"Brilliant!" I remarked. "How did you know?" I was curious, I knew he was a good detective, but that was eerie and a little disconcerting.

"Because one can't see everything you do and not be affected in some way. Plus I can see a prescription bottle hanging out of your jacket pocket." Jungkook nodded towards my pocket. "Do I think they are for another condition? Maybe, but insomnia seems to be the likely and more probable answer." Jungkook seemed like he was proud of his deduction. I was just flabbergasted and sat down on the little coffee table in front of the sofa.

"Now you broke her!" Taehyung gently admonished his flatmate, while observing me. I waved him off.

"I'm fine, doctor," I stressed the doctor part. I wasn't just some case for Jungkook to solve, nor a random patient for Taehyung to fix. "Actually you were perfect with your assumptions. I wasn't planning on sleeping when I went back to my motel room. I cannot sleep. I haven't been able to sleep the night through for three years."

"Three years?" Taehyung asked confused.

"Since the day my father died Taehyung." I hissed at him, angry at the emotions that hit me full force whenever I thought of my father. "I can sleep with the help of an aid, usually in the form of a pill or alcohol."

"That's not very healthy." Taehyung frowned at my self-medicating methods.

"Neither is not sleeping!" I snapped back. Jungkook chuckled at our stubbornness, before he turned back to the window. We all heard the front door bang.

"Yoongi-hyung." Jungkook hummed, turning to look out the window. I watched him, bemused as he seemed most disinterested in this Yoongi person, yet again he seemed interested in a way. I would say maybe the anticipation of a case, but you never know with Jungkook. He was hard to read.

As I heard the footsteps ascending the stairs, I turned to look at Taehyung. He looked highly amused as he looked on from his seat on a wooden chair. I was curious as to see whom exactly this Yoongi character is. Finally the man himself walked into the room.

Looking up I saw the government official from before. Only now he was carrying an umbrella like a cane. His eyes locked on me and my breath caught, locked in his predatory stare. He smiled coldly at me, which made me shiver.

"Ah, Agent DeYoung, correct?" I nodded my heart sputtering frantically. "Nice to see you again."

"You've met?" Jungkook turned from the window to look at us both. Yoongi nodded.

"Yes, we did." My throat was still frozen, and I couldn't get any sound out of it. "Rose isn't it?" I nodded, feeling a lot like I was underneath a predator's perceiving eyes. "Funnily enough, I ran through the list of agents that are abroad, and there was no match for you."

"Maybe, they mixed me up with someone else. You know, us Americans, not as efficient." I gave a nervous forced chuckle.

"Yes, that thought crossed my mind as well. However, nor your name or your picture results in a match in the database. So Miss DeYoung would you like to explain to me or the National Crime Investigation Unit of Korea your reasoning for impersonating a federal agent and illegally entering South Korea? Not to mention as well as forgery, and illegally entering a crime scene without proper authorization." Yoongi hissed at me. My eyes were wide and I looked at Jungkook in a blind panic. For all my bravery and courage, I had no idea how to handle this situation.

Dean had always been the talker. He could manipulate his way out of a paper bag or convince government official they had sent him there, and therefore he had the right to be at that crime scene. God, did I miss Dean, my older brother, my protector. I lightly touched Dean's amulet before looking at Yoongi again.

"Here, why don't you call my superior officer, Agent Willis?" I tried to sweet talk him, but he wasn't budging. Finally Jungkook intervened.

"Yoongi-hyung, lay off." Jungkook finally stated, lounging on his leather chair.

"What? Brother mine, do you know her?" My eyes widened comically at this revelation. Yoongi and Jungkook were brothers?

"Yes, I do, as a matter of fact." I stifled my laughter. Yes he knew of some of the important parts of my past, but he didn't know me. But I suppose having your eyes opened to the supernatural world, really forms bonds. I had to grin at Taehyung who as well appeared amused. Yoongi just further deepened his scowl.

"Jungkook and I are besties!" I burst out, causing Jungkook to send a similar scowl, like that of his brothers, in my direction.

"No we are not." I pouted and sat down again on the edge of their coffee table.

"What has you rattled, brother mine?" Yoongi took Taehyung's empty chair. I rolled my eyes and picked up a newspaper, which was lying beside me on the table.

On the third page I found an article that I was searching for. 'Man Commits Suicide: Three Gunshot Wounds to the Head.' Eager to return to hunting, especially now that I had solved a case, I pulled out my cell phone and made a phone call.

"Bobby? Hey it's me. I think I found another case. Seoul Times. Man commits suicide. No, Bobby, I'm sure it's our sort of weird. Pull it up! Three gunshot wounds to the head?" I grinned at his reply. "No, but I'm going shopping. Yup! Need some equipment." With that I hung up on one of the few remaining family members I had left.

"Another case?" Taehyung raised an eyebrow at me, from his perch on the wooden chair. "Do you think that's wise?"

"Equipment?" Jungkook questioned raising an eyebrow.

"May I use your bathroom?" Jungkook waved me off, after looking at me for a few moments, and Taehyung gave me directions on where it was located in their flat. I grabbed my beat-up satchel and went into the bathroom. Luckily for me I always keep a set of bar clothes. As well as a make-up kit in that satchel and shoes.

I walked out into the living room once I was finished. Yoongi noticed me first – his eyes went wide and he visibly swallowed hard. Taehyung noticed Yoongi's expression and turned to look from where he had planted himself while I was gone – the couch. Finally Jungkook noticed the attention they were giving me and looked up as well. The usually stoic detective's eyes went wide as well.

I was wearing a pair of short white leather shorts. I paired it with a teal corset-like top and a pair of white stilettos. The shorts showed off my tan and the shirt revealed my stomach as well as my tattoos. I had put on a shimmery pink lip gloss, white eye shadow, mascara, and shimmer on my cheeks. My hair, I just fluffed quite quickly.

"Uh, you going out?" Taehyung asked. I rolled my eyes at this rather obvious information.

"Yes, I need to go out, get some money." I gave them all an unimpressed look.

"Oh?" Taehyung gave me a weird look. I couldn't figure out what his problem was, when I suddenly realized what he thought I was going to do for money.

"Oh God no, Taehyung!" I fairly screeched. "I don't sell my body for money!"

"That's a relief then." Taehyung leaned back into the couch.

"You do sell your body for money." Jungkook intoned blandly, causing Taehyung to stare at me. "Just not in the way Taehyung is thinking."

"What?" I was incredulous and trying not to stare at Taehyung, whose eyes were burning holes in my body.

"Yes, it is quite evident from the provocativeness of your outfit. It is basically screaming to earn the attention of the opposite sex." Jungkook looked and sounded bored. I could still feel Yoongi's eyes on me, which if I were being honest with myself, weren't exactly unwelcome. Yoongi was attractive, commandeered power, and acted like a gentlemen. The only reason I could not see anything progressing between us was his life was organized and mine was in chaos. The Government and the Hunter? Polar opposites, as well as different walks of life.

"What are you going to be doing?" Taehyung asked me, his eyes narrowed in suspicion.

"God!" I flung myself on the arm of the chair Yoongi was currently occupying. "I'm going to a bar, going to play some pool, drink, win some money, and then probably go back to my motel room ALONE!" I stressed the last word and my southern accent was becoming more prominent. Taehyung smiled, satisfied before he leant forward again.

"What are you going to be doing, in order to win some money?" He again, narrowed his eyes at me. I sighed annoyed at all this questioning. Even with as protective as Dean had been, Taehyung was being even more protective.

"Taehyung, I'm going to be fine." I stressed to him. "God you are going to be even more overbearing than Dean ever was."

"I'm just - "

"Concerned for my well-being. Yeah I know." I finished the sentence for the concerned soldier. "Again, trying to become an overprotective third sibling." I snapped, getting up from my perch beside Yoongi. I walked to the door, before I turned on my heel and looked at Taehyung. "Besides, my father was a marine, Taehyung. I know how to handle myself."

Then I left the apartment building and walked to the skeevy, rundown bar I had asked Jungkook about when Taehyung had excused himself. I played my part well enough and left with a little over a thousand pounds. I returned to my motel room, elated and slightly inebriated. Finally I was able to sleep – with minimal nightmares.

The next morning I was awoken by the message alert of my phone. I blindly grabbed it off the old, stained nightstand. A new message was displayed from phone number +44 7544680989. Frowning I opened the message and viewed it.

~Come to 221B Cheongdong Street. With haste – JJK.

I didn't even have to wonder how he had gotten my cell phone number. With his brother being Yoongi, a top government official, if not the government, Jungkook obviously had information at his disposal. A dangerous thing I thought, as I rolled my eyes, found a semi-clean pair of tight jeans, a white ribbed tank, my black boots, and then to complete the outfit, slipped on Dean's brown leather jacket.

I quickly brushed my teeth, hair, and then took a moment to look at my face in the mirror. I wasn't vain, just wanted to see how bad I looked. What peered back at me was awful. I had dark circles that extended to the tops of my cheekbones. My face was paler than normal, making me look strange, especially since I had a dark tan. Popping a couple of aspirin for the hangover, I left the motel. I walked the ten blocks to Cheongdong Street, all the while receiving texts to tell me to hurry up.

~Haste makes waste – JJK.

~This is decidedly urgent – JJK.

The list of texts continued to grow. In the half hour it took me to reach the apartment I must have received about fifty texts if not one hundred.

By the time I reached Cheongdong Street I was shaking with rage. I slammed the outside door and ran up the stairs two at a time, meaning to give Jungkook a piece of my mind. When I reached his open apartment door, I was fully prepared to yell at him. But I shut my mouth when I saw Jungkook tied to one of his table chairs, in the middle of the sitting room, with a man standing beside him.

"Who are you?" I demanded as I walked inside his apartment. Jungkook's eye's flickered over to me as he assessed me. His eyes were cold as ice, not allowing his emotions to betray him.

"Ah, my lovely Winchester." The man standing there, addressed me. My body tensed at my real name, and my face became frozen beneath my own mask.

"Who are you?" I demanded again, my fury quite known to all in the room by my voice. I put my hand on the small of my back, only to come to the realization that I had not slipped my gun into the waistband of my jeans. My heart sank, but thankfully Jungkook's kitchen was equipped with salt, and I had my rosary wrapped around my wrist.

"Oh, someone forgot their weapon." The man smirked at me. I swallowed hard as he laughed. Jungkook briefly closed his eyes.

"Who are you?" I demanded again.

"Little Winchester doesn't remember me!" He smirked. I really wanted to knock that smug look off his face, so I clenched my jaw. "Let me let you remember."

"Dean!" I yelled as the doorknob turned. Dean was thirteen, so he was coming home a little later than I did, with Sammy having to stay at school tonight. I thought maybe he was coming to check on me, as I was the only one left at this motel. Dad was off on a hunt, a few towns over so as not to risk our safety. I was excited to have Dean there as it meant I was no longer stuck by myself.

However, I was in for a shock when the door opened. The large man, the same one who had Jungkook tied up, was standing in the doorway. I screamed and ran as the man followed me. He picked me up and walked over the salt line I must have broken when I came home. I received a hard blow to the head and promptly blacked out.

As my memory came back, I rubbed the faint scar left on my right arm, as the result of our encounter. The man grinned as he could see that I remembered him. Or at least, remembered what torture he had put me through.

"You." I gasped. He gave me a smile and nodded his head. "How did you find me? I thought my father had put you back where you belonged."

"My sweet little Helia Winchester." The man walked past Jungkook, confident he wasn't going to break his bonds, in order to stand in front of me. He lifted his left hand to rest on my cheek and began to stroke the smooth skin. "How could I forget so captivating a girl?"

"Don't touch me." I whispered to him. My voice betrayed me, carrying no real bite with it. It revealed the terror I was feeling at the moment. His grin grew wider.

"I think I'm affecting you." I just shook my head, trying to free myself from his hypnotic gaze. "Don't be like that. We can rule if you'll just join me."

"Leave her alone." Yoongi's voice said from behind us. I closed my eyes feeling hopeless in this situation.

"Who's this? A boyfriend Helia?" He dug his fingernails into my cheeks. I cried out as I felt the fingernails slice into my delicate skin. Blood was trickling down my cheeks.

"Let her be!" Yoongi demanded again. The man raised his blood streaked right hand and sent Yoongi careening into the wall. He hit hard, I could hear the solid thud, and had to hope that he was alive. Though it didn't sound like he would live. He grinned at me, as another tear fell down my face, leaving a trail through the blood.

"What say you to becoming mine?" He lifted his other hand from my right cheek and stroked his thumb over my abused left cheek.

"I say no." I told him, firmly my eyes burned with hatred for this man. He threw back his head and laughed for several moments. Yoongi groaned behind me, so he was thankfully still alive.

"That's the spirit I love. You would never bore me Helia Winchester." He stopped for a moment to contemplate me. "I'll ask you one more time. And then I'll break every one of your fingers before continuing on to the rest of your body. Will you be mine?"

"No. But I will say Cristo." I watched as his face morphed with anger, and his eyes turned black, exposing his true nature. A demon. He hissed at me before grabbing my small hands in his and proceeding to break both of my thumbs. I screamed. "Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus - " He broke my right pointer finger, extracting another scream. "Omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursion infernalis - "

"You really shouldn't play with fire, Helia." The demon in front of me smirked. "Dean's having a lot of fun in Hell. Maybe you could go visit him."

"Adversarii, omnis legio, et secta diabolica - " With a feral grin he snapped my left wrist, causing me to let out a long, loud, ear-piercing scream.

"Just breaking your fingers was boring and monotonous." He admitted.

"Ergo Draco maledicte et section - " Finally the exorcism was having an effect on him. He was shaking and holding his head. "Ergo, Draco maledicte et lego secta diabolica, Ut Ecclesiam tuam secura tibi facias servire - " I let out another scream as he dug his fingernails into my left wrist, the one he had just broken. I could feel the bones grinding together.

"As I said, don't mess with me Helia." He hissed.

"Libertate,, te rogamus," I stopped as he fell onto the floor and began to writhe in pain.

"You forget?" He growled. "I'm going to - "

"Audi nos." With a scream of black smoke, the demon was exorcised and the man's limp body hit the floor. I suspected the poor man was dead, but I couldn't be sure. My knees gave out as the pain coursing through my body, started to make it known. In a matter of minutes, Yoongi was up off the floor. He said something to me, which I couldn't hear, before Jungkook fell to his knees before me looking quite frantic.

I couldn't hear anything through the buzz in my ears. After what felt like years, Detective Kim, Jung Hoseok, and several other police officers filed inside the little apartment. The paramedics followed shortly thereafter, rushing to my side.

I was taken to a nearby hospital via ambulance, never really comprehending the words they were saying to me. Once I reached the ER I was given x-rays and my cheeks were attended. They had to splint three of my fingers and wrap my wrist in a cast.

Afterwards the medical personnel gave me the all clear to return to my home. Jungkook, who had waited in the hallway, escorted me out of the hospital. We stopped beside a black jaguar.

"Helia," Jungkook nudged me gently with his arm. I looked at him and could see his mouth moving, but couldn't focus on anything he was saying. I was still in a great deal of pain. He helped me into the backseat, probably deducing I wasn't all there mentally to comprehend what he was saying. Everything was a blur, though I do remember smelling a lovely, mint scent as my body floated through the air.

When I woke up, I was lying in an unfamiliar bed. One in which I could easily see wasn't the hotel bed, as it was too comfortable. The room was decorated in greens and creams. There were two huge windows and the sun was streaming through in a pleasant manner. Sitting up I noted something was wrong with my hands. Something wasn't right, something was weighing my hands down.

Looking down I saw the cast on my left wrist, the two broken fingers on my right hand and the other broken finger on my left hand. My pain was excruciating and my head was pounding. I could feel an uncomfortable throbbing in my cheeks.

I got up out of bed, and noticed a glass of water along with a pill bottle. Reading the label, I quickly found out they were for pain, so I fished two out of the bottle and swallowed with the water. Looking down, I was still dressed in my jeans and my tank, though my boots and jacket were missing. After having a glance around the room, I found them, my jacket on the chair and the boots sitting directly beside the chair on the floor. Shuffling along the room, I found a mirror overtop of the fireplace.

There were bandages on my cheeks, my eyes were puffy and bloodshot, and my tiredness was evident and clearly read on my face. Short memories of what had occurred the night before, I hoped, resurfaced in my mind, but I just shook it off. I realized that I needed to use a restroom, so I ran my eyes along the room to find a cream painted door with a crystal knob. I walked through this door, to find what I had been looking for, a bathroom.

After I had used the bathroom, I splashed cool water on my aching face, mainly on my forehead as I was trying to avoid getting my cheeks wet. I knew from experience that you did not get stitches wet. Then I gripped the white porcelain of the sink, and just stood there, all the while I let my knuckles turn white. I took a few deep breaths, and collected myself. After I had calmed myself, I exited the bathroom and forwent my boots, choosing to explore this house barefoot, exited the bedroom.

I looked around as I exited the bedroom, when I noticed that I was being kept in a nice house. The hall was well lit with natural light, as well as torches lining the wall for evening. I found many doors as I looked up and down the hallway. I shrugged, and started to walk down the hallway, towards the window where the plush red carpet dipped down to begin the stairs.

I started the middle aged woman who was coming up the stairs with an armful of towels. She gave a little shriek, her free left hand pressing towards her chest. I gave her a small smile.

"Oh dear!" She finally gasped out, in a pleasant voice. Giving her the once over, she was dressed in a typical white and black maids outfit. Her hair had been pulled back into a bun, she had on no make-up and her feet were covered in plain black oxfords. "You're awake!"

"Yes," I stated. She flushed a little underneath my gaze.

"He wants me to ring him as soon as you are awake." She walked over to two large double doors, made of wood and pushed them open. I followed her and peered inside to see a large king-sized bed covered with a black and blue duvet. There was an impressive oak desk, a bookcase, two nightstands, and two adjoining doors into this bedroom.

The maid reappeared from a door to the left, devoid of towels. Must be the bathroom, I thought before following her down the stairs. She led me to a room where I found a laptop sitting in front of the fireplace. Obviously this was the library as books lined the walls. I sank into a chair near the laptop, and I spied a note attached to the glossy black machine.

"I'll arrange for a tray to be brought to you. He will be home as soon as he is able." With that the maid left. I had to roll my eyes at her obscurity, and peeled the note off the computer.

~Please feel free to utilize this computer.

Hopefully it can occupy your time until I am

Free to return home.

The maid came back in about half an hour later, depositing a tray beside. She assured me it was all gluten free. I picked at the plate, and sipped the soup absentmindedly. I was sucked into the world of online gaming by this point.

"What do you mean times up?" I yelled out angrily as the screen taunted me with the game over flashing across my game.

"You have managed to get a better score than the majority of others, my dear." My head snapped up to meet the amused face of none other than Min Yoongi.

"I should have guessed." I said with a frown, as I shut the lid with a snap. I then deposited the new computer on the table directly in front of me, beside the lunch tray.

"Miss Winchester." Yoongi sat in the chair beside my own, but as I was sprayed across the arms of the large, leather recliner, he was almost across from me.

"Please call me Helia, or Lia." I told him, still scowling at this man. He merely nodded, before he began to drum his fingers on his own legs.

"Alright then Helia. You are wanted in connection with a brutal assault and two murders in Saint Louis, Missouri." Yoongi raised his eyebrows at me. "Apparently you aided your two brother's."

"It wasn't Dean!" I vehemently protested these ridiculous claims against my dead brother. "It was a shape-shifter!"

"A shape-shifter?" He raised an eyebrow, obviously skeptical at these claims.

"Yes, you saw what happened in Jungkook's flat! That was a demon." I informed him, trying to protest my innocence. I knew he was practically the British government. He could have me extricated and sent to the FBI, if he so chose. "The supernatural is real! You have even seen it!"

"Alright!" Yoongi finally snapped at me. "I will have you cleared of all suspicions." I snapped my head back up to look at him.

"Really?" I asked him, shocked at this turn of events. I had no idea why he was being so nice to me. I mean I was practically a stranger, someone he couldn't even be sure that he trusted. I lied about my occupation in order to get into South Korea, and he found out that I am wanted in connection with two murders.

"Yes. I cannot have a suspected accomplice to a murder, a criminal, resting and living underneath my roof." Yoongi said haughtily. I snorted at the logic behind his answer. Yoongi merely rolled his eyes at me before standing up as the clock struck seven.

"Come." He indicated to me. He even helped me to stand, as my hands weren't really a help anymore. "Dinner is done and waiting to be served." I took his hand, in order to get up from the seat with limited difficulty and followed Yoongi to a huge dining room.

There were two places set at the table, one at the head and the other to the right of the head. We sat down, Yoongi pulled my chair out for me, before taking his seat at the head of the table. Immediately after the both of us were seated, a man came out with the first course. We were served a soup first, then steak, potatoes, and asparagus. For dessert, we were subjected to brownies and ice cream. I declined the brownies, but I did accept the ice cream, and was brought a large array of toppings.

"Yoongi?" I uttered the first word of the meal that wasn't just polite dinner talk about the meal.

"Yes, Helia?" He turned his face towards me. He actually had a slight smile on his face.

"Am I staying here for several more days?" He nodded an affirmative. "I'm going to need my bag brought here then."

"I know. I took the liberty of having my driver take me to your hotel to retrieve them earlier." Yoongi frowned at the memory. "And you will not be returning to any of those low-rate hotels while you continue your stay in Seoul."

"What?" I asked, shocked and outraged. How dare this man take the liberty of telling me what I was going to do and what I was not allowed to do. Even my father hadn't told me what I wasn't allowed to do, as I got older. Yoongi had another thing coming if he thought for one moment I was going to allow him to tell me what to do.

"I encountered all sorts of unsavory beings while obtaining your personal items." Yoongi gave me a tight-lipped smile, as if to indicate his annoyance at having to deal with people who were above him. I opened my mouth to give him a retort, but we were interrupted by his cell phone ringing. "I have already had Eva, the housekeeper, remove your belongings to your room. The house is for you to explore, save my study at the end of this hallway and my personal quarters." With that Yoongi hurried out of the room, already having accepted the call, and talking on the phone in a foreign language.

I ended up staying at Min Yoongi's house for longer than I had originally anticipated. My casts came off after six months, which ended up being August. I had anticipated more of a warmer summer, but the warmest it was had been in July with temperatures reaching approximately 70 degrees. Once I had my casts removed, and my hands were free again, I bullied Eva into fetching me a bottle of soju. I started to drink it as I watched the television, the 1993 rendition of the Three Musketeers.

"Helia!" Yoongi's cross voice sliced through the blissful blackness that I had surrendered myself to three hours prior. I had done well, nearly drinking the entire bottle, before I succumbed to the drunken, dreamless sleep, which I had been attempting to reach.

"Yoo-i!" I stumbled over his name, not completely sober yet.

"Oh god, how much have you had to drink?" He walked over to me, laying on his hardwood living room floor. The soju bottle was lying beside me, not enough in the bottle to spill onto the floor. I merely blinked up at him from my spot.

"I fink I've had tree bottlesh." I told him feeling very dizzy. My stomach was swirling, circling, lifting, quite violently as well. Yoongi must have noticed my expression for he helped me to the bathroom, where all the liquor and food in my stomach met it's end, in the toilet, quite violently I'm afraid.

Yoongi held my hair back as my heaving continued. Finally, finished with vomiting, Yoongi drew me onto his lap. I pressed my face into his suit coat and began to sob. I inhaled his minty scent, as my sobs shook my frame.

"Helia, it's alright now, poppet. It's alright." I fell back asleep, welcoming the oblivion.

My head was splitting. That was the conclusion I came to when I opened my green eyes. It appeared to be morning now, though a small lamp had been left on. I spied two white pills and a glass of water on the bed-side table. I took the pilled and gulped the cool water. It took about ten minutes before the thumping in my head, lessened slight, just becoming a duller cacophony. Getting up I slipped on a dressing gown I had stolen from Yoongi before going to the dining room in an effort to slip into the kitchen and gain some food.

"Ah, how are you?" Yoongi's voice boomed through the empty room, causing me to wince and he to hide a smirk behind his newspaper. There were multiple files abandoned in front of him on the table.

"Like someone is beating my brain to death." I remarked dryly. He gave a light chuckle as I sat down at the table.

"Oh, my dear, I highly doubt that." I rolled my eyes at his apparent mirth. I ate my breakfast, slowly, though I felt quite hungry. Yoongi stood up before I was done, snapping his newspaper closed, and quickly draining the last of his coffee. "I'll be home at six. My assistant will stop by at around two with an outfit for you to wear. Please ensure you are presentable by 6:30." Yoongi bent and pressed his lips to mine quickly. "See you tonight."

As he exited the room I raised a trembling hand to my tingling lips. What had just happened? Had Min Yoongi just kissed me? I couldn't believe it. The man who ran Korea himself, had asked me on a date, I think, and then given me a kiss as if we had been together for years. I raised an eyebrow in disbelief before a text startled me out of my musings.

~ And my dear, I believe tonight is what one refers to as a date. – MYG.

I began to laugh at the absurdity of Yoongi's dating expertise. Obviously this would end up being an interesting relationship with Min Yoongi. Lord only knows, that I am not the type of girl who would stand for being ordered about and controlled. Even by the government. He ought to understand that about me, but I couldn't deny my feelings for Min Yoongi.

The hunter and the politician. The rule-breaker and the enforcer. The lamb and the lion. That is our stance in life, in a nutshell. Though I don't like to think of myself as a lamb, the saying fit with our relationship. One that is unlikely, though hopefully it will prosper.

I continued my laughter as I made my way to my bathroom for a long bath. I soaked in an amber and vanilla bath for longer than normal before I got out and tied a robe around my body. By the time two o'clock had come, my hair was semi-dry, no longer dripping at the ends, but not exactly purely dry either.

Yoongi's assistant was very handsome. He was glued to her phone though, every few seconds firing a text off. It couldn't be Yoongi, since he preferred to talk on the phone, only texting on certain occasions, or when he had a dentist's appointment as Jungkook informed me. She handed me a large garment box and several other smaller ones before she disappeared out the door.

Eva came to collect me for a late lunch, which consisted of soup and salad. The chef made a delicious miso soup, and a chicken salad, which didn't survive very long. I gave my compliments to Eva who made sure that she gave to the chef.

Then I went to my room and began to look through the boxes. The large garment bag held a stunning silver dress, with a sheer panel for the stomach. The other three smaller bags, held a pair of silver heels, and then a diamond necklace, earrings, and a matching bracelet. I worked on drying my hair, and then curling it.

I even put on a spray which Eva assured me would bring out the red and gold highlights in my hair. Then I put on my make-up, smoothing my complexion with a mousse foundation, and added some shimmery luminescent. I put on my silver eye shadow, and added a glitter overcoat, in order to make my eyes pop more. Then I added some mascara and a little light eyeliner.

For the final touch, I added a silver pink lip gloss which matched my entire ensemble for the night. Adding some of my little hairclips, Yoongi had so generously provided, I put my hair back in a little woven net of hair.

Then glancing at the clock which displayed 5:58, I began to get ready. I slid on the silver dress which looked like fluid swirling around my body, after I had it completely fastened. Adding the heels, added to my height, which didn't make me look so short, when compared to Yoongi who stood at 5 foot 10 inches. I was only 5 foot 3 inches, so he was over half a foot taller than me. I clasped the necklace, slid the earrings into my ears, and then fastened the bracelet and was ready to depart.

As I was walking out the door, I turned and hurried back to my desk, where my perfume was waiting patiently. I gently spritzed some on before walking out of my room, flipping off the light, and making my descent down the stairs like some kind of movie star. All I know is that South Korea better look out – for if the two of were able to concrete our relationship, we would be a force to be reckoned with. I met Yoongi at the bottom of the stairs and threaded my arm through his. We were going to be a power couple.

 

Chapter Text

A/N: Again this is my own original work, though I have adapted several stories from prior one-shots I had posted on other fanfic sites. Trigger warning.

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Warning Trigger warning!
You always struggled with depression, self-harm, and had an eating disorder. Thankfully Seokjin had been your rock, stood by your side whenever you felt down, and never asked for anything in return. Unfortunately though, with him gone on tours and the hate that you had been receiving from fans, you had resorted back to previous methods of coping.

The razor blade that you had hidden inside of the well-worn book was still shiny and new when you pulled it out. The shiny silver metal was literally just begging you to take it and slice right through the delicate skin on your forearms. You heard Jin's voice in your head begging you to just pick up the phone and call him, but you decided not to bother him with your issues.

The blade sliced through the thin skin, exposing the soft flesh underneath as well as the blood that ran through your veins. You grin as the feeling of being out of control goes away for just a few moments, until the hate for yourself simmers underneath the skin again, demanding to be let out. Again. And again. And again, until you can hardly recognize the bloody mess of skin that used to be your healing arm.

Three weeks later the guys were coming home. You were panicking as you had lost weight, had dark circles underneath your eyes, and your body had become your canvas. Trying not to let any of this show, you dressed in a nice outfit, but with long sleeves to conceal the hate.

"Hey jagi!" Jin rushed to hug you as they arrived in the airport. Guiltily you hugged him back. He gently tipped your head up to look into your eyes. His eyes narrowed as he caught sight of the hate that you so wanted to conceal from him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" You rush to say. He looks like he doesn't believe you but the other guys come up and gather you into a tight hug. You squeal and hug them all back.

"Y/N tell me what's wrong," Jin commands as you were both driving back to the dorm. Your mother wasn't thrilled about the two of you living together without being married or even engaged but she did acknowledge that it would help keep you safe from yourself.

"Nothing," you deny anything, the guilt eating away at your heart a little more. You didn't want to lie to Jin, but knew if he knew what you were doing he would be disappointed. And that was an emotion that you couldn't deal with anymore. People being disappointed in you.

"Y/N just tell me!" Jin shouted, causing you to jump. "I'm not an idiot! I know something's bloody off about you!"

"Everything is fine Jin!" Honestly why couldn't he just let this go!

"Y/N I promised your mother that I would keep you safe!" Jin stated, his face serious and showing his disappointment. "And you've obviously lost weight and those are dark circles underneath your eyes! You are too pale as well!"

"Just leave it Jin!" You shout. Doing something that you haven't done since being a teenager, you bail out of the car. Seokjin shouts and tries to grab a hold of you, but you throw yourself out of the car. You hit the ground hard, before you are up and running away from JIn who had gotten out of the car. He made no attempt to run after you, just looking at you sadly.

Three hours later your teeth were chattering as you walked in circles around the wooded area. It was getting late and your phone had been left in the car, so you couldn't even call anyone for help. Giving up, deciding it would be best to just die and not disappoint anyone else, you lay down on the ground. And close your eyes.

"Jinnie?" You utter as you open your eyes, finding a white ceiling and hearing the sounds of machines beeping. His brown eyes lock onto yours and he starts crying in relief.

"Oh my god Y/N, I thought I lost you," he says tears forming in his eyes. "I love you too much! Don't ever do that again!"

"I won't," you promise. He smiles before it turns grim.

"Y/N we have to talk," Jin says his tone serious.

"What?" you ask, already dreading the conversation. It’s clear he knows what you've been doing, you’re in a bloody hospital.

"They are going to admit you," Jin admits after you refuse to answer him. You gasp.

"What? Jin, jagiya, please don't let them! I can't - " you start sobbing, but he just shakes his head.

"I can't Y/N," he says. "You are a harm to yourself. I'm sorry. It's going to be only for a few months. The boys and I will come by and visit. Hopefully this will help you. It’s obvious this is out of my hands."

"Jin, please, I'm sorry," you sob. He nods in understanding.

"I know, love. I know," he wraps you in a hug.

"I don't want to go! I mean you're only back for a few months. I'll never see you!" You whine as he gets up to leave.

"Sweetheart I understand, I really do, but obviously you need some help from professionals. I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to visit you for the first two weeks you are in hospital," Jin said tears in his eyes as he gives you a gentle kiss before leaving as the nurse appeared at the door.

"Seokjin please!"

Once you were situated in the hospital, thankfully a private room, you started to unpack the suitcase. Inside on top of all your clothes was a huge bundle of letters, each one with a date on it or a weight from every member. Then there was a bag filled with little gifts - Yoongi had provided three notebooks, Jimin had provided a packet of your favorite pens in every color, Taehyung had gotten you a new shirts, Jungkook had put in a few snacks as rewards, Hoseok a stuffed animal, Namjoon a few books, and Jin had put in a box with a beautiful microphone necklace.

Three months later and you were discharged from the hospital. The guys were off on tour, which was disappointing, but Jin's mother Eun-hee came to pick you up. She was understanding the whole time you were in treatment, not once judging you.

"How are you feeling?" She asked as you pulled into the crazy traffic that dominated Seoul.

"Better now. I have a healthier understanding of food as well as my own body," you said with a smile. She nodded.

"I'm proud of you. So are all the guys. We know that this is a difficult thing to actually recover from, but never forget we'll be with you every step of the way," Eun-hee said as we pulled into our driveway. She hugged you before you got out and went into the home that you hadn't seen in a quarter of the year. It was perfect, even though Jin wasn’t here to share your victory with you. It was enough to be healthy and happy once again.

Chapter Text

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After Hoseok came home from tour you both spent as much time together as you could. He was only going to be home for a couple of months, so you wanted as much time with one another as possible. However, Hoseok began to notice that you were feeling off - something that could be potentially life threatening.

It all began after he had been home for a few weeks. You couldn't deny that something in your body just didn't feel right - something was wrong. You kept having to use the bathroom, you were hungry, yet your clothes were falling off your body, you were more thirsty, and so tired, even if you did nothing but cuddle with Hoseok all day.

That day you had both been invited to a pool party held at one of the exercise clubs that Jungkook frequented. You were excited as you got into your bikini and pulled on a dress to hide the exposed skin until you were at the pool.

"You excited babe?" Hoseok teased as you were nearly bouncing in your seat. You grinned and nodded at your famous and drooled after boyfriend.

"Of course!"

"It's not like we haven't seen the guys multiple times over the past couple of weeks," Hoseok drawled. You wondered if he were possibly jealous.

"Hobi!" You protested playfully. He laughed and continued the drive to the club. You were greeted by the guys as Hoseok and you went out onto the back patio that the staff informed you about.

"Y/N!" Jimin squealed and wrapped you in a tight hug. He frowned at you as he backed away, making you wrap your arms protectively around your body. "Are you okay?" He asked in a low voice, trying not to be too loud for the others to hear.

"Chim I'm fine. Just tired and more thirsty than usual, but I'm okay," you reassured your friend. She gave you a wane smile before letting it go. Tae was next, and gave you a huge hug but noticed nothing different.

Once everyone had all caught up on each other's news it was time to have a mock party, with just us present. Jungkook, Jin, Hobi, and Joon were the first to strip and jump into the pool. Then they began taunting us until the rest of us until we had acquiesced and started to strip. Chim and Tae were the fastest and jumped into the pool. You were careful while you removed your clothing and folded it so that it wouldn't get wrinkles. Then you finished stripping off of your street clothes and stood at the edge of the pool.

"Oh my God!" You heard Jin exclaim, which brought a frown to your face as you wrapped your arms around your torso protectively.

"Y/N," you heard Hoseok say. "Babe." He got out of the water, which was loud since everyone had stopped talking and chatting to see what the commotion was about. "Is it the hate?"

"What are you talking about Hobi?" You asked confused. You poked your stomach a little. "I've been feeling so tired lately that I haven't been running or exercising. Do I really look that bad?"

"Y/N, we can get you help," Namjoon said in his careful and slow tone before getting out of the water to stand beside Hoseok.

"Help for what?" You were confused.

"Your eating disorder," Jimin spoke up, having the most experience in this area. "Are you purging?"

"What? NO!" You insisted. "I've been eating tons of sweets; I thought the commotion was about weight gain." You laughed uncomfortably. Jimin looked at you thoughtfully.

"Honey you said you were tired right?" You nodded at his question. "What other symptoms have you been having?" She asked as Hoseok wound an arm around your waist. His thumb stroked the smooth, taunt skin of your side.

"Uh, eating tons of sweets, thirstiness, and I keep peeing a lot," you said after thinking for a moment. Jimin got out of the pool and dried off before grabbing his phone and keying in the symptoms.

"Hobi-hyung smell her breath," he commanded. Hoseok looked taken aback at this demand.

"Uh why?" Hoseok questioned. Taehyung chuckled a little.

"Yeah hyung that's a bit strange," Taehyung stated.

"Not a bit, a fucking lot," Yoongi retorted, snorting a little.

"Just do it Jung Hoseok!" Jimin exclaimed without using honorifics. Hobi shrugged after sending her a glare at the full use of his name before leaning towards you. He sniffed your breath and then looked at you oddly.

"Babe did you drink alcohol recently?" He asked. You thought for a moment then shook your head.

"No. I haven’t drank since you guys left for tour. I ate candy at home before we left, but I brushed my teeth before we got here," you said. Namjoon looked at you a bit oddly.

"She needs to go to hospital Hyung," Jimin said.

"What?" Hobi said, looking a bit panicked. I wasn't much better, just able to hide it more effectively than Hoseok.

"I think she has diabetes. All of her symptoms point to diabetes," Jimin said and Namjoon nodded his head. You went over to your clothes and put them on before letting Hoseok pull you out of the patio.

"Text us!"

"Call!"

"Do you need one of us to go with?"

"Feel better!"

Finally the both of you were out of the club and into the car. The drive to hospital was a bit long and boring, but nothing needed to be said. Once you were at hospital the both of you got out of the car. You gripped Hobi's hand a little too tightly, but he said naught about it.

"How may I help you today?" One of the receptionists asked.

"My friends think that my girlfriend may have diabetes," Hoseok said to her. "Can we get her tested?"

"Sure. Let me have you fill out the paperwork, as much as you can, and we will take your girlfriend back for the doctor to look at and then give her the appropriate tests," the receptionist said. You didn't want to go with her, but Hoseok whispered that he would be back as soon as he was able.

They made you take an hourly glucose test. After several hours the diagnosis was positive for Type 1 diabetes. They administered insulin and kept you in the hospital for several days until you were able to administer your own insulin, plus your blood sugar was very high, so they wanted to monitor you and bring the levels down. 

Hoseok stayed with you as often as he could and the other’s visited; some nights he even slept in the room with you. It was a comfort to have him near, plus he needed to learn how to administer the insulin as well, in case something happened. Hobi and you were both happy that your friends had noticed something was wrong.

Chapter Text

A/N: No I didn't steal this one either. . . I had it on another site. . . . For another person. . . Quotev I believe. . .

Jung Hoseok aka Hobi/J-Hope

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It had been a long journey for you, to end up here in Seoul with BTS on the phone texting you continuously, asking where you were. You sighed and answered Namjoon back that you were getting refreshments before locking the screen and not answering another text for the time being. You sighed as the angry buzzing of your phone alerted you to the new texts that the members of BTS were sending.

You weren’t a child – perhaps still a teenager, but you knew the dangers of a large city. You appreciated that they were looking out for you, but really they didn’t need to. You had been looking out for yourself for most of your life and knew that you would continue to do so throughout the rest of your life. It wasn’t that your family wasn’t supportive, they were, you were just a very independent person.

After visiting a convenience store and gathering up enough drinks for the members of Bangtan Sonyeondan, you caught a taxi and nearly an hour later, pulled up in front of the dorm. You got out of the cab, handed him the fare, and gathered up your suitcases and bags to take into the dorm.

You heart was hammering as you waited in the elevator – all of the members of BTS would be in the dorm to greet you. Even Min Yoongi was going to be there, which made your hands shake, not because you had a crush on him, but because you would be the center of attention. The elevator dinged to inform you that your destination had been reached, so you gathered up the bags, ignoring the sharp pain in your torso, and began looking for the dorm number.

“Here goes nothing,” you thought to yourself as you knocked several times upon the unadorned white door. The cracking of your knuckles against the door created a sharp sound which reverberated throughout the hallway and into the apartment. After a few seconds of silence, you heard a loud screeching sound and what sounded like a herd of elephants making their way towards the door. You stepped back anxiously, as the door swung open and three faces were suddenly in front of you.

“Um, hello?” You said nervously, as Namjoon’s face appeared behind the other two, which were of Jimin and Taehyung. Hobi’s head bobbed somewhere behind them, but you couldn’t really tell since you were suddenly pulled into a bruising hug. You yelped and they let you go with some questioning glances but you shrugged it off.

“It’s nothing guys. I got kicked by my horse two days before coming here,” you said nervously, which was true. The imprint of the hoof was on the middle of the back, black and blue with lines extending from the brunt of the impact. You were just lucky that your horse hadn’t broken any of your bones, as it was wont to do before or even bitten you.

“Ouch,” Namjoon was able to sympathize having ridden a horse before. You nodded and they let you in, only to be attacked once more by Jin, Jimin, Namjoon, and V. Hobi had held back, but once the way was clear he gently hugged you, careful with your injuries.

“Thanks Hobi,” you smiled at the tall, sunshiney guy who took your suitcases from you and was treating you very gently. He blushed a little and mumbled something before taking the luggage and going to the room that you assumed you would be spending the next two weeks sleeping in. Or maybe not, knowing the guys and their crazy ways as seen from their interviews and Vlive videos.

 

It was nice living with the guys for a while. It gave you a break from working with your horses and also a chance to get to know the individuals that you would be collaborating with, as Namjoon told you that they wanted you to be on their album. That made you excited and happy, so you called your parents to tell them the news.

They were happy for you to receive this opportunity, and so were you but it only meant more work on top of your already busy schedule of training/breaking horses, taking college courses (you had gotten your GED at age fifteen, so even though you were only sixteen, were able to take some courses), making videos, and now added on top of that practicing with BTS and going on tour in a few months. It was enough to make your head swirl!

The day before you had to leave you made sure that you spent time with every member of BTS. It was hard to leave them all, but you all knew that in a few months you would be back together for practice and going on tour! Whooo!

 

 

During those few months away from the gang, you noticed that you spent more time texting and skyping Hobi than the other members of BTS. You also were a guest on a couple of his Vlive vids, and there was a whole fandom of your shipname. It made you blush, but not because you were embarrassed; you wished that this fandom was actually true.

“You like Hobi!” Jimin teased you one day as you guys skyped. Jimin was probably your best friend out of everyone – he would listen to you talk for hours or text you to ask you how your day was. You blushed though at his direct approach and covered your face with your hands.

“No!” You protested, laughing because you knew it was true.

“V!” Jimin yelled at the top of his lungs, causing his best friend to come into the room and smack him in the back of the head.

“Hey Y/N, what’s up?” V greeted you with a grin.

“Y/N has a crush on Hobi!” Jimin sang out and V started to laugh.

“Everyone knows that except for Hobi and Y/N!” V replied making you groan and try to hide in your covers. “But I think that you should tell him. It’ll be too awkward for you both on tour for a few months. In the same dorm, hotel? Y/N just tell him.”

“I can’t!” You moaned. “What if it ruins our friendship? I don’t want him to hate me or think that I’m a lovestruck fan. I don’t want him to be awkward around me!”

“Y/N what if I told you that Hobi likes you as well?” Jimin said, looking quite serious. V scoffed and rolled his eyes at his omission.

“What?” You gasped before feeling hurt. “Jimin! Don’t tease me like that!” He was going to say something else but your father poked his head through the door.

“Y/N I need help in the barn,” you nodded your head and told them bye before ending the Skype session without further ado.

The reason why your father needed help in the barn was that several of the mares had gone into labor. The next few days were crucial as you ran around getting warm buckets of water, mucking out stalls, making sure that you rubbed oils all over their bodies, and even sleeping in the barn so that you might be near when they gave birth.

“Hey Y/N!” You answered your phone and allowed it to go to video as you were breaking up a flake of sweet hay. It was Hobi who was calling to see why you had been so elusive for the past few days. Jimin and V had tried calling as well; you should say every member of BTS had called, but you didn’t have time to answer all the calls.

“Hey Hobi,” your tiredness showed. Your face showed the exhaustion, drooping eyes, large bags underneath, and it looked like you had two black eyes from how prominent the dark circles were.

“Holy shit Y/N! Have you been sleeping?” Hobi yelped looking at your face with concern.

“I’m fine Hobi. It’s birthing season. Ten of the mares went into labor and the other five can go at any time. I’m out here in the barn so that I might be able to call my dad or the vet if anything happens.” You pulled your hoody closer to your body as you took the phone and a bucket of warm bran back to your favorite mare, Misty of the Mountains. She nickered as you put the bucket into her stall. She snorted and got to her feet. “Hobi meet Misty. Misty, Hobi.” You stroked her sweat streaked, bay neck.

“She’s so big,” Hobi was in awe as her head came to rest by your shoulder. You grinned with pride.

“Yup. She’s my baby,” you pressed a kiss to her velvety nose. She snorted again and started to pace. “Misty?” You walked over to her and being careful felt her stomach. It was moving, contracting. You were excited as you felt that. “Hobi, I hate to cut this short, but Misty is going to give birth any hour now. I’ll call you back later okay? I’ll show you the foal!”

“Alright Y/N!” Hobi gave you a grin. He didn’t have the heart to scold you for not sleeping when he saw the excitement on your face. You ended the call between them and got ready to help her if need be when she gave birth.

 

Five hours later and you were helping the baby get out of the amniotic sac. You watched as the foal tried to get to his feet as Misty licked the foal all over. You got out your phone and FaceTimed Hobi who answered immediately.

“Is everything okay Y/N?” Hobi asked. You grinned widely and turned the phone so that he could see the foal struggling to their feet.

“Say hello to the new addition to the family Hobi! I thought about naming the foal, but as I don’t know the sex yet, it’s hard,” I admitted. He awed as you both watched the foal finally get to their long, lanky feet. You were able to get a look at the underneath and saw that it was a male. “This never gets old, Hobi. And it’s a male. Do you have any names?” You asked Hobi who looked shocked for a minute.

“What’s the mother’s name?”

“It’s call dam, Hobi and her name is Misty of the Mountains.” You replied to him. He was silent for a moment before humming.

“Well I was thinking something with one of our songs. Like Bullet Proof Mountains, or Spring Day of the Mountains, or Misty’s Spring Day.” Hobi admitted. You squealed with the last one.

“Misty’s Spring Day it is then!” You smiled widely at Hobi and whispered the name to Misty who flicked her ear at you. You watched the scene before you as the foal started to nurse and Misty gently nosed it.

“Thank you, Oppa!” You said with a smile. His heart warmed to see you so happy. He wanted to make you happy like that all the time.

“It’s not a problem Y/N. But when do you get to sleep?” Hobi asked, concerned over your health.

“Oh, there are only four more mares now that need to give birth. I have to get back to them, make my rounds, but I’ll get back to you. Maybe you can name some more!” You said with a smile. He nodded.

“I’d love to Y/N,” J-Hope waved crazily at you sending finger hearts. You giggled and went to visit the other mares. That night two others gave birth, two fillies.

Hobi named the one Teardrops and Rose Petals, after the mother whose name was Rose in Bloom, and the other was named Trespassing Thru Secrets after Monsta X. He had fun naming them and you were upset that they were all female. He didn’t mind though and you promised to get some sleep once the other two had given birth.

Lucky gave birth that night to a male, a colt which you named Hobi’s Mama’s Boi after Hobi. Lucky didn’t take well to her foal, and it was up to you to rear it. It made you sad when she rejected it and your posts to Twitter and Naver weren’t positive that night, but you made sure to make up bottles and feed Mama’s Boi. It was difficult especially when you were still waiting on Dancing in Meadows to give birth. Finally, she did, the next day in the afternoon, and you called the colt, Genius Min which made Yoongi tweet to you numerous times as well as all his fans.

Three weeks later and the members of BTS flew from Seoul out to your farm to visit, and Yoongi was stoked at having a horse named after him. You were tired, and knew now what your mother had gone through after giving birth as you were essentially Mama’s boi mother now.

“Hey Y/N your friends are here!” Your father called into the barn as you were in the process of feeding Mama’s boi.

“Send them in!” You yelled back. Mama’s Boi was finished with his bottle when they walked in and proceeded to flop down, right on top of you! “Mama’s Boi!” You giggled with laughter as your horse went to sleep, though you were able to move the foal off of you. He put his head in your lap as you ran your hands over his baby fur.

“Is this him?” JImin cooed coming to sit beside you, not caring about the hay. You nodded and he started to lightly stroke the coat of your horse.

“This is Hobi’s Mama’s Boi,” you grinned up at your friends. “Unfortunately Lucky rejected her foal, so I am now Mama’s Boi’s surrogate mother.” Jin awed and came over to pet him as well. You beamed down at your foal as he fell asleep on your lap.

“You guys want to see the other’s huh?” You motioned to them and lightly pulled his head off your lap. He didn’t notice and continued to sleep, though this time on the hay. You led them around to see the other horses. Yoongi loved the horse that you named after him, his cold exterior cracking. You laughed as you watched them all coo and goo over these foals.

“Y/N can I talk to you for a minute?” Hobi seemed nervous. You nodded and led him away, to Mama’s Boi’s stall, so that you could see if he needed you. “Y/N I - ” He nervously rubbed the back of his neck and sighed.

“Hobi what is it?” You were concerned seeing the normally confident guy acting really nervous.

“I uh, fuck it!” He suddenly said before leaning down and kissing you. You were shocked for a moment before snaking your hands around his neck and kissing back. He pulled away after a few moments. “So does that mean you like me too?”

“Of course Hobi!” You grinned happily and kissed him again. This time it became a little more passionate and Hobi had you pinned to the stall door. You were broken up by the sound of whistling.

“Yoongi! Hobi’s cheating on you with Y/N!” Jungkook yelled running back towards the others.

“NO! Sope!” Yoongi bemoaned. You just laughed and looked up at Hobi.

“So will you be my girlfriend?”

“Hmm. I dunno. I’ve already named a horse after you. I suppose so,” you teased Hobi who rolled his eyes.

“Good because I wouldn’t have let you go otherwise,” Hobi smirked before pecking you nose.

 

 

Chapter Text

Min Yoongi

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(Because who doesn’t like seeing Yoongi in leather?)

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Some days I have good days and other days I have bad days just like other people – like other normal people. However, my good days and my bad days are intensified way worse than that of normal people. For example, the last time that I was in a good mood, I didn’t sleep for a two weeks and bought a whole room makeover because I thought that a faerie room was awesome.

Needless to say that the Tumblr picture of this extraordinary faerie room didn’t turn out to look halfway like my own room.

That is what the room was supposed to look like. Only my lights got tangled as did the netting and once I came down off my good days I cried. Yoongi came home from tour to find me crying and the room completely wrecked from my stupidity.

“Oh baby,” Yoongi dropped his bags at the door and came over to gather me into a hug. I hiccupped from my violent crying and attempted to explain to him what had happened.

“It *hic* wasn’t *hic* s-s-s-sup-p*hic*posed to look *hic hic* like this!” I wailed as he rocked me back and forth. He shushed me and planted kisses all over my head.

“It’s okay now,” he soothed. We stayed like that for hours, him comforting me and me crying pitifully on his lap. I felt bad when I awoke that I hadn’t greeted him properly. I got out of bed and padded downstairs once I had visited the bathroom to you know, do stuff, and then splash water onto my swollen and reddened face.

“Oh good you’re awake,” Yoongi greeted me in the kitchen. He was making soup and had sandwiches already made. I grinned at my loveable boyfriend and gave him a kiss. He grinned and deepened it, after shutting the soup off. “Now that is welcome I can get used to.” He turned back to the stove, never seeing my face drop at the reminder of the welcome that I had greeted him to.

“Sorry about earlier,” I nervously played with the strings of Yoongi’s hoody that I was wearing.

“What?” Yoongi spun around, fixing me with an unreadable expression.

“I just mean that I wasn’t able to greet you properly,” I said sheepishly. I heard the click of the stove before Yoongi walked over to me.

“Hey, I don’t care,” Yoongi replied softly. “I just care that you are safe. You welcomed me home, no matter when it was.”

“I love you Suga,” I muttered before wrapping my arms around my loveable boyfriend and resting my head on his chest. He hummed and pet my hair.

“I love you too,” he murmured before pushing me gently away. “So let’s eat!” I laughed, that was so typical of Yoongi to say. He was addicted to food, literally the same way that I was addicted to writing and listening to music.

 

That night my depression came back. If you hadn’t already guessed I am a bipolar, which mean that I have extreme mood swings. One day I’m happy and ready to conquer the world, the next I’m a sobbing mess and want to sleep, or commit suicide over a dumb occurrence or trigger. Yoongi was fully aware of this fact and always helped me the best that he could, whether it be accompanying me to the store when I was manic or holding me close when I was depressive.

I cried for the majority of the night over nothing. I just felt like I couldn’t do anything right in the world and that everything was my fault. I cried for people who were homeless, cried for sick humans, cried for sick animals, cried for lost pets, cried for the Tumblr disaster, cried for the past disasters. Basically I wept a sea of tears for anyone. Yoongi slept soundly; he would be pissed in the morning when he awoke, but I didn’t want to wake him. He barely got any sleep while on tour with BTS, and he needed his sleep – the dark circles underneath his eyes attested to that.

“Hey baby,” Yoongi whispered into my ear the next morning. I just let out a groan and curled up into the fetal position to avoid waking up. “Y/N c’mon.” He shook me a little, before trying to pull the blankets off of my body. I fought it though and kept them clutched around my miserable frame.

“Suga I don’t want to get up,” I muttered drowsily. He hummed and pressing a kiss to my fabric covered forehead left the room, and left me to a peaceful sleep.

“Y/N come on,” Yoongi was back. It was night time and I still hadn’t moved from the bed. I didn’t get up to use the bathroom and my bladder was really starting to kill me. “Y/N, at least get up and eat something.”

“Not hungry,” I grumbled and rolled over, my back now to my boyfriend. Yoongi sighed and ran his hand down my side.

“Okay. But there’s pizza if you change your mind,” he said quietly before leaving the room and going into the kitchen. I slowly got out of bed and went into the bathroom. Once I was finished I looked at my face in the mirror, hating what I saw. I wanted to claw at my skin, get rid of my face.

“I hate you,” I muttered at the pale, swollen face in front of me. “I HATE YOU!” I suddenly shrieked, putting my fist into the center of the silver, reflective surface. The mirror splintered, pieces lodged into my fists as I hit it over and over again.

“Y/N STOP!” Yoongi screamed and wrapped his arms around my frame. I noticed another person in the doorway, it looked like Hoseok but I couldn’t be sure.

“Hyung is she okay?” Yup. It was Hoseok. Hoseok who didn’t know about my problems, Hoseok who had now seen me in the midst of a freakout fit.

“Yeah. Just get me the bottle of pills in the drawer by the bed, please,” Yoongi said as he rocked me in his arms. “What’s wrong?” Yoongi ran a hand down my cheek, his eyes betraying his pain.

“I couldn’t take it anymore. I hate me.” I muttered childishly into his hoody as I buried my face, away from his eyes.

“Don’t say that,” Yoongi sighed as Hoseok came back with the bottle of pills. Yoongi took them from Hoseok.

“Don’t want them,” I stated.

“Y/N have you even been taking any of them?” Yoongi sounded sad as he looked at the contents. It was still as full as the day in which he left.

“I don’t like the way that they make me feel,” I hugged him tighter.

“Well I don’t like the way that you act without them. And you need to take them,” Yoongi informed me, shaking out a couple into his palm. He filled up a glass with water and handed it to me along with the pills.

“Don’t want to,” I pouted at him refusing the pills.

“Don’t make me force you to take them,” Yoongi threatened me, sounding quite serious about it. “I’ll call Jin-hyung.” I blanched and took them hurriedly along with the glass of water. “Thank you.”

“I wanna go back to sleep,” I felt tears welling in my eyes once more.

“Shh,” Yoongi rocked me back and forth as I cried. Once I had calmed down again, Yoongi set to work on fixing my hands after lifting me onto the sink. He was so gentle as he pulled out the slivers of glass and then wrapped them in gauze. “Don’t do this again, okay? Please for me?” I nodded, feeling numb as the medication coursed through the red blood pumping in my veins.

That was why I didn’t like to take the medication. Not to mention the side effects but I felt sluggish and numb while my body adjusted to the chemical changes that the medication did. It also made me feel cold, gave me nosebleeds, lack of concentration, decreased appetite, and at times stopped my heart. Thankfully the latter was only when I had first started the medication and since hadn’t stopped my heart. Amidst a whole other battalion of horrendous side effects.

“Let’s get you to bed,” Yoongi hummed as he took me into the guest room. I was too tired to even question this and fell into a deep sleep once Yoongi tucked me into bed.

It took me a few days before I began to act more like myself and less like a zombie. It usually took about two weeks for the medication to take full effect, and only about a week before the worst of the side effects wore off.

“Hey looky!” Hoseok looked up from the video game he was playing to see me, fully dressed, with makeup on and a smile on my face. “Welcome back to the land of the living girly.”

“Hey Hoseok,” I smiled widely at him. “Yoongi making pancakes?”

“Yup,” Hoseok laughed at my eagerness. “Glad you’re feeling better cupcake.”

“Hey!” Yoongi suddenly yelled from the kitchen. “Don’t call my girlfriend pet names.”

“Fine!” Hoseok shouted back. “I’ll start calling her troll!”

“Suga!” I protested and went into the kitchen where Yoongi was cooking, wearing a customary beanie, a t-shirt, and a pair of skinny jeans. “I love you.” I kissed his neck and he shuddered.

“Don’t do that,” Yoongi scolded me. “But I love you too.”

I set the table as Yoongi continued to cook. It was a comfortable silence, one in which neither of us needed to say anything. Yoongi knew that I was grateful to him for taking care of me, and I knew that Yoongi loved me.

“Hoseok! Breakfast!” Yoongi yelled and Hoseok came flying into the kitchen.

“Uh not to be rude, but why are you here?” I asked the energetic guy as we ate breakfast.

“I came here to visit my besties!” Hoseok flashed me a smile as he crammed more pancakes into his mouth.

“But you literally just got off tour with him,” I pointed at my boyfriend.

“But I didn’t get to go on tour with you!” Hoseok laughed. I rolled my eyes and commenced eating, though not too much as I still had a decreased appetite.

“We have a surprise for you!” Yoongi sang out after we had finished breakfast.

“What?” I asked eagerly, rinsing off the plates and putting them into the dishwasher.

“Come find out!” Hoseok and Yoongi grabbed my hands and propelled me to the bedroom. I was apprehensive as they told me to close my eyes. I did as they wished and when they told me to open them, lo and behold was the faerie room that I had attempted to create.

“Guy,” I turned to them in awe of the room. “You didn’t have to.”

“We didn’t have to but we wanted to,” Yoongi announced. Hoseok left shortly afterwards, muttering something about needing to beat his high score and Jungkook. I pulled Yoongi into a kiss.

“Thank you,” I whispered breathlessly as we pulled apart. “I think it looks better than the one on Tumblr.” With that Yoongi and I took a selfie of ourselves in the room and posted it to Twitter. I put in the #bestboyfriendever tag as well.

 

Chapter Text

Kim Namjoon

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“Why can’t you leave it alone?” I shouted at my boyfriend who looked angry. He had every right to be angry with me, I just didn’t want to admit it. Hell I was angry at myself.

“Because you know that this isn’t right!” Namjoon shouted right back. I was actually surprised that the neighbors hadn’t alerted the authorities after all the yelling and screaming. We had been fighting for well over three hours now.

“And I didn’t ask for your opinion!” I yelled back before grabbing a glass figurine and throwing it into the opposite wall. It exploded in a beautiful display of shattered glass that caught the rays of the light. It would have been a beautiful sight if the entire scene was precipitated by the angry aura that emanated from the two of us, nor the anger that the display generated from.

“Stop!” Namjoon shouted, his anger more pronounced as I grabbed another trinket and threw it into the wall. He stepped forward and grabbed ahold of my wrists in his hands. I screeched and tried to get him off of me. “ENOUGH Y/N!”

“NO! NO! NO!” I shouted and felt the tears begin to blur my vision. Namjoon began to pull me closer to him, pulling me into his strong figure, before releasing my wrists and wrapping his arms around my frame.

“Everything’s going to be alright,” Joon murmured to me while I continued to sob hysterically into his shirt. I curled my hands into fists and began to pound on his chest, but he never flinched, only continued to soothe me.

“I don’t,” I said to him, the fight leaving me exhausted and with no strength left to protest.

“It’s alright Y/N,” Namjoon soothed, pulling me with him towards the couch where he wrapped me into a blanket. He knelt in front of me, putting his hands on my knees. “It will only be for a few months. Jagi, when you come back things will be normal once again.”

“But I don’t want to go Joonie!” I cried. He raised a hand from my knee to caress my face, which only meant that I turned my head to nuzzle into, breathing in his spicy scent. “I don’t need to go!”

“Y/N we have tried to work on this together for a while now. It isn’t working. The professionals there will be better suited to giving you the care that you need,” Joonie soothed. I knew all of this. I knew everything, and knew that he was right, but I didn’t want to be separated from Namjoon for the next few months. I didn’t want people to find out and call me names. Yet now it was too late and in an hour he had to have me in the car and deliver me into the arms of those who wished to experiment upon me.

 

“Y/N you need to talk,” my psychologist stated during my twelfth session with her. I rolled my eyes and stayed silent, picking at the white sleeve of the uniform we were all mandated to wear. “If you don’t begin to talk you won’t get out of here within the time frame promised. How much longer do you want to be separated from Namjoon-ssi?”

I continued to ignore her. She had no idea about me or Namjoon. How could she even begin to talk about him, to hang that promise over my head. She continued to talk to me.

“Y/N Namjoon-ssi calls me after every session. As you know due to the laws that bind us as client and doctor I cannot discuss our conversations to outside parties, but he is concerned about you. He wants you to get better, and I know you do too,” Dr. Ahn said to me. She always told me this and let me make my own decisions. To get more control over my life. “Y/N, our time is done here, but I have one last request. If you feel uncomfortable talking to me, I want you to take this. Perhaps it will do you more good than these sessions.”

She handed me a leather bound book. It was quite thick with lined pages that were blank. It was perfect and I ran my hand over the cover and binding, reverently.

 

That night I couldn’t sleep as I kept thinking about that book that lie upon the small desk in the corner of my room. I sighed and got up, flicking on the light switch and sat down before the desk. I grabbed a pen and began to think back.

 

Dear Joonie,

I wanted to talk to you face to face, but I guess that I don’t have the guts to do so. I wanted to tell you everything from the time that we first met, but kept chickening out. Therefore, things got to be too much for me to handle and I ended up losing control until it all spiraled out of hand. I never wanted this to separate us, for this to put a strain on our relationship.

I remember when we met – at the mall in Seoul. You looked like you were going to fall over you were so exhausted and I remember looking over at you feeling sympathy for the guy who was strained so much.

I never noticed the way that your eyes followed me around the mall as I visited my favorite shops nor the way that you were conveniently in my way for the most part. I do remember tripping over a top that had fallen off the hanger and you were there, catching me before I injured myself.

I was nervous as I felt the warmth from your hands seep into the tank top that covered my skin. Never before had I had such a response from any individual before, especially not from a stranger I had just met. You chuckled a little before removing your hands once you were sure that I was stable on my feet. I was shy and didn’t know what to do until your hand cut into my vision.

“Kim Namjoon.”

“Hi. I’m Y/N Y/L/N. Thank you for making sure that I didn’t fall,” I can hear myself say as a small smile played on my lips. You shook my hand but before releasing it you kissed my knuckles. I remember thinking to myself that you were a gentleman, old fashioned perhaps, but so very different from other people.

“Hey it’s no problem,” I remember thinking that your accented was a bit odd yet endearing. “You can make it up to me by coming with me and getting something to eat at the food court.”

Just those two words made my whole body break out into a sweat. I didn’t want to eat, especially not in front of a stranger, but I remember nodding my head, feeling captivated by your warm brown eyes. I remember you laughing as you grabbed a hold of my hand, entwining our fingers and pulling me through the store and mall to the food court.

“What do you want to eat?” I heard you say and felt my heart catch in my throat. I was feeling the panic overwhelm me at this point and pulled away from you to wipe my sweaty hands on the fabric of my tight jeans. You had no idea why I was feeling nervous at the time, but as my habits became more apparent you seemed to understand my relationship with food.

I quickly scanned the food establishments, calculating in my head the one that had an item with the least number of calories. I finally ended up picking Subway and you just nodded your head, never once complaining though I was supposed to be doing this to repay you.

I ordered half a veggie sub, while you ordered a whole sub full of meat. I could appreciate your hunger and didn’t mind when you ordered such a meal. You urged me to get something else on it, but I told you that I was fine, a vegetarian. You nodded, not quite believing me, but you didn’t say anything else.

We sat down and ate, our first date if you will, even though I insisted that I pay for your meal, which you had protested vehemently. You told me that you were a gentleman and you would pay while I insisted that I was paying you back.

You were talkative, and I loved that about you. We talked for what was hours, until the sun went down and I panicked because I needed to be home. You walked me outside the mall and to my car, even though I insisted that you need not do such a thing. You gave me your phone number and told me to call or text you anytime to hang out more.

I debated for a couple of times before finally growing a backbone and texted you nearly four days after we had lunch. You asked me to accompany you to the park where we sat on the benches and played for hours. After that we texted back and forth and went out on numerous dates. You took me to meet your parents, who were lovely and welcoming. I immediately felt like I was part of your family and then a week later you gave me a key to your house.

We finally made the decision official after about a month of my using your house, and we moved in together. It was then that everything went downhill. It was then that my terrifying secret was found out once you connected the dots and realized that I never ate in front of you.

I remember you confronting me in the living room one night after I had come home from university. You were hurt and didn’t understand but after talking about it we agreed that we would do it together. I honestly tried, Joonie I did. It was hard for me to gain a healthy relationship with food, but for you I tried. I tried not to cry as I forced a bite of sandwich down my throat and you smiled and encouraged me with every bite.

But then I started to pretend that I had eaten and fell back into the same patterns. You were angry at me and chose to check me into a rehab facility that dealt with individuals suffering from eating disorders. I was so scared that day when you told me, and I reacted with anger. I never wanted you to see that part of me, never once. But I wanted to remain with you, not be locked up in an institution where people could accuse me of being insane.

Now though I want to thank you for caring for me so much. For caring enough to get me help. For caring so much about me that you put a stop to my destructive methods. I want you to know that I love you more than everything in the world, and I will never stop loving you. You mean the world to me, the galaxy to me. I could never have asked for anyone better Kim Namjoon and hope that this remains between us until we are happy and old, watching our grandchildren, and great-grandchildren run around with that childlike innocence they will exude.

I love you Kim Namjoon. And I always will. Forever and always.

With that I put my pen down and shut the book. It was my last day of being in the institute and I was going to see Joonie for the first time in nearly four months. My therapist was happy about the progress that I made and promised me to keep writing, no matter what. I promised her and asked for a ribbon to tie around the book she had gifted me. I wanted to give it to Jordan. She handed me a bit of beautiful silk white ribbon and gave me a schedule.

Then I was off, down the hallway towards the door where my handsome boyfriend, Kim Namjoon was stood, smiling with his dimples on display at me. I laughed and flung myself at him. He was happy as he pressed kisses all over my face until he captured my lips in his and gave me a passionate kiss.

“Let’s go home okay?” Namjoon smiled at me, entwining our fingers together. I nodded enthusiastically and let him lead me outside of the institution. I was happy as we drove home, listening to music and laughing about what we had done. Before we got out of the car I handed him my journal.

“What’s this?”

“Please don’t read it until later, and preferably when I’m not home okay Joonie?” I requested. He nodded, but looked concerned for a bit. I smiled and kissed him once more. “It’s nothing bad, I just don’t want to see you when you read it, okay?”

“That’s fine, jagi.” Namjoon was sweet and granted my request, reading it one day when I was at school. When I came home, no words needed to be said, he just pulled me onto his lap and cuddled with me for the rest of the day, promising to always be there with me. Forever and always. And he was.

Chapter Text

“Mama!” My little girl was screaming while I was inside the car on the way over to the Weekly Idol shooting with BTS. I tried to soothe her to the best of my abilities, but her having an earache was difficult on the small 2-year-old girl.

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“Can’t you shut her up?” My producer grumbled and I glared up at her.

“No, I cannot,” I snapped back, cradling my daughter in my arms.

“She’s not even supposed to be here!” Inhye snapped back.

“I can’t just leave her by herself while she is screaming in pain because of an ear infection!” I sighed and looked out the window of the car. “The fans should accept it.”

“Accept it? You were a bloody teenaged mum!” Inhye pointed out.

“My fiancé died in the line of duty. So, they will have to get used to it,” I said, feeling so tired. My daughter was quieting down a little bit, but that was only because she was getting sleepy. I stroked her soft brown hair as she fell into a light slumber and put her thumb into her mouth.

“No, no, no,” I muttered and pulled it out, slipping a pacifier inside of her mouth before she could fuss too much.

“We are here,” the driver announced and I unbuckled my seat belt.

“She stays here,” Irina ground out.

“No. I’m not leaving my child behind any longer. Especially when she’s sick,” I challenged her and got out of the car to the screams of my fans. I waved and smiled, adjusting Madison on my hip. They all cooed at her.

“Time to shine,” my assistant Macy said with a proud smile at me for sticking up for Madison and me. I nodded my head and walked behind her to the doors of the studio.

Loud exclaimations erupted and caused Madison to jerk out of her doze and start to cry. I bounced her up and down while I smiled at them all. Macy motioned to them all to calm down as I walked over towards where BTS were standing in front of Doni and Heechul.

“Well look at you!” Doni came over to hug me and Heechul followed behind.

“This looks beautiful!” Heechul complimented the black and brown loose fitting dress I was wearing. It had a black belt around the waist. http://www.polyvore.com/interview/set?id=216368962  “Who is this cutie?”

“This is my daughter Madison,” I grinned at Heechul. Everyone had become deathly silent. “She is two years old, and right now has an ear infection so she cannot leave her Mama.”

“Aw,” Heechul cooed and Madison stopped her wailing.

“Do you like Heechul, sugar?” I asked her with a soft smile as I handed her over to Heechul.

“Mama,” she said behind the pacifier and I took her back from Heechul and Doni.

“Sorry Heechul, she’s a little fussy. She’s not feeling too well,” I apologized. Heechul shook his head and motioned for me to have a seat on one of the chairs. I nodded to the guys in appreciation before taking the seat between Park Jimin and Jung Hoseok.

Madison buried her face into the fabric of my dress whining the entire time. I shushed her quietly, petting down her back as the two hosts smiled at us.

“Well guys this is Sophia Cross everyone!” The guys cheered, though more subdued now that they knew that Madison was there.

“Thank you for having me,” I said into Jimin’s microphone as I didn’t have one of my own just yet.

“Good to have you here with us. Now before we continue, introduce us to this one.” Doni motioned towards my extremely pale daughter who was curled up on my lap.

“This is Madison guys. She just turned two a few months ago,” I smiled for her as she whined in a pitiful manner.

“You are twenty correct?” Angus asked. I blushed and nodded my head. “So, that would have made you 17 when you were pregnant?”

My cheeks reddened at the enquiry and Hoseok put a hand on my arm while Jimin placed a warm hand on my back. I smiled at them and motioned for them to calm down.

“I didn’t mean it like that!” Doni was quick to say.

“But you were so young,” Kim Heechul stated.

“Well her father was in the Marine’s,” I said taking in a deep breath. “He went away for basic training and when he came back for a couple of days Madison happened. He did propose to me before he had to leave for his tour of duty. Jimmy never knew that I was pregnant – he died in an explosion just four weeks later.”

“Oh my god,” Kim Heechul covered his mouth while Doni looked shocked. I shrugged and played with a ring I had on my hand.

“It’s okay,” I said to them. “Perhaps I do regret becoming a parent at such a young age – especially when I am touring the world so much, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world.”

“I think someone has a question,” I could feel Jimin’s hand on the back of my neck. I shivered and I could see him smirk out of the corner of my eye.

I had met the guys several times in the past – but they like everyone else had no idea that I had a daughter. I didn’t flaunt my body, nor my personal life around so I had no reason to talk to them about her. I couldn’t deny that I had always been attracted to Park Jimin, but also attracted to Jung Hoseok. I needed to have a relationship that was stable, neither of the idols could provide that, someone willing to be there for both Madison and me.

“Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” Namjoon asked.

“My producer and manager didn’t like the idea of me ‘promoting’ teenage pregnancy,” I made air quotes. “Plus, I would have liked if she had a normalish life.”

“Normalish?” Jin teased me and I frowned at him.

“Shut up,” I replied just as playfully. “Respect your elders!”

“Are you two together?” Heechul asked and my cheeks turned a brilliant red color – probably as red as Jimin’s hair before.

“Oh no,” I shook my head and made a disgusted face.  “This guy? And me? Yeah that is totally not happening.”

“Hey!” Jungkook cried out. “What’s wrong with me?”

I wanted to shout, you aren’t Jimin or Hoseok, but I just kept that bit of information hidden for now. I rolled my eyes at him and then started to name off reasons why I wouldn’t date him.

“Your last name is Jeon. You are too strong. You sweat too much. That aloof thing – eh, so not my type.” Jungkook got out of his seat to put his hand in front of my mouth muffling what next I had to say. I licked his hand.

“EW!” He yanked it away and started to scrub the palm of his hand on his pants. Namjoon leaned over to high five me and started to laugh.

“Mama,” Madison whined, burying herself into my dress. I cooed and rested my head-on top of hers.

“It’s alright, sugar,” I hummed to her softly as the guys answered the questions that were aimed towards them. Then I was told that I needed to be the judge of their dancing. I grinned as they all started to chatter amongst each other.

 “Alright Sophia, which one is the best?” I laughed as I saw their attempts at girl dancing.

“Madison?” I questioned her and she hummed lifting her fever glossed eyes up at the MC’s. She stared at them for a moment before smacking at Jimin while Heechul chose Rapmonster.  

“Hey no fair!” V called out and I rolled my eyes at him. “Which one is your favorite?”

“My favorite is whichever one Madison chooses – she chose Jimin’s.” I informed the brunette boy at the very front of all his members, who rolled his eyeballs.

I sat back down and Hoseok stole Madison from me. I was shocked when she nestled into his embrace – resting her flushed cheeks on his sweatshirt.

I had to realize then that Madison liked him as well. Probably as much as I did – just in a different, completely platonic way. He was so good with her, as I could see throughout the rest of the interview he took care of her.

Maybe I should just bite the bullet and let myself go out on a date with Jung Hoseok. But how would I go about it? And what about my feelings for Park Jimin Just ask him out? I mean what if he doesn’t feel the same –

“You okay?” Jimin asked me grabbing my wrist as I went back to continue my nervous picking.

“Fine,” I ground out as the variety show came to an end. Jimin didn’t look convinced but we all stood up to say our good-byes and hug each other. I finally pried Madison from Hoseok.

“See you all in the studio, okay?” I said with a bright smile and a wave before I left. I got into the car and sat there breathing heavily as we went back to the apartment that was rented for Madison and I during our stay in Seoul.

 

The next morning I got up and found that Madison was feeling a lot better. Being on antibiotics for the past three days had helped and her pain was minimal. She still wanted to come to the studio with me, but I had her stay at home with Macy because I didn’t know how long we would be.

Macy and I compromised with Madison telling her if she was good then she would be allowed to come to lunch with me. That got her to let me go without tears, screaming, and the usual grumbling. I managed to get out of the apartment.

“You are going in that?” Inhye wrinkled her nose at me as I sat in the back of the car.

“Yeah, something wrong?” I asked her and she shook her head. I was wearing a pair of black leather pants, my black tank, a leather jacket and black leather combat boots. It worked.

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“Nothing,” she hissed, but I knew that she didn’t approve. I was supposed to be a sweetheart – not some punk chick. I didn’t care though, it was my life and my choices.

We finally pulled up in front of the studio and I quickly exited the car. I went into the building, escaping the whispered commands of Inhye as she trailed along behind me shouting things that I needed to remember.

“Sophia! You cannot just ignore me!” She screeched as I walked into the room where BTS was congregated. “You have to listen to me!”

“I don’t have to listen to you!” I snapped, losing my patience. But my patience had been wearing thin for a while – I mean she had been bossing me around for over a year and a half. It was bound to happen sometime.

“Your contract states - ” I rolled my eyes and turned back to the guys as she continued to yell and screech at me.

“You look nice,” Jimin winked and I ignored him as Inhye became worse and worse.

“I didn’t say anything but that stunt you pulled yesterday nearly cost you your whole career!” She continued. “All for a brat!”

“Do not call my daughter a brat,” I spun around so fast I thought I had whiplash. “She isn’t a brat. She is a toddler.”

“She is still a brat!”

“She is a toddler. Something that I would have thought that you had grown out of by now Inhye?” I questioned her innocently, the BTS guys snickering behind me.

“How dare you!” She practically screamed. I winced – the sound akin to nails grating on a chalkboard.

“Inhye please just leave,” I sighed not wanting to fight today.

“If I leave I take your dreams with me,” she threatened getting closer to me.

“Actually, did you forget that we are here? We will talk with your people and she can finish out her contract with us,”Namjoon said standing up and putting an arm around my shoulders.

“We’ll just see,” Inhye thrust her nose up in the air as she left the room. I sagged in relief.

“Thanks guys,” I sighed and turned around as she left. Namjoon and the rest all started to laugh.

“That was fantastic!” Hoseok grinned. “You look fantastic too.” I blushed at his compliment though the seven guys all nodded their head vehemently.

“It was a bit of a step for me if we are being honest! On both accounts,” I laughed as I sat down. The leather was quite comfortable – not at all as constricting as some pairs of jeans that I had worn in the past.

We all got to work on writing songs together. It was fun – though some of the proposed lyrics were mildly inappropriate to say the least. Around 12:30 Macy called me to tell me Madi and her were on their way. I told the guys and we waited for them to arrive before going out for lunch.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Jimin helped Madison with her food and cutting it up for her. It was so nice to watch him just be around her. I couldn’t picture a better scene.

“You’re staring,” Yoongi muttered after nudging me in the ribs. I started and stared at him.

“Huh?”

“You are too obvious,” Yoongi sighed eating another bite of jjajangmyeon. I just raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean?”

“You like Jimin and Hoseok, don’t you?”

“Uh, kind of,” I admitted, ducking my head.

 “They both like you too. I’ve never seen them try so hard,” Yoongi sighed. “Look just be you. Don’t change for either of them. That’s quite honestly the worst thing that women do. Change who they are. Guys like you because you are who you are. Not because you change to meet their expectations.”

“Thanks Yoongi,” I grinned and gave him a one-armed hug. He rolled his eyes before Jungkook stuffed some food into my mouth. I sputtered indignantly as I chewed, gathering the attention of the whole table. Yoongi and Jungkook were smirking, so I did as well.

“What?”

“You are going to get it,” I said before grabbing an ice cube from my glass and shoving it down Jungkook’s back. He yelped and wiggled around as everyone else laughed at him.

“I hate you already,” Jungkook muttered as we all settled back in to wait for the check. Hoseok wiped off Madison’s face of all the cheese that she had managed to smear across her cheeks. I grinned at the sight – my heart doing a strange flip-flop in my chest.

“Look at Appa Hoseok,” V teased his brother who rolled his eyes before lifting her out of the booth.

“Oof!” Hoseok teased tickling her tummy as he set her down on his hip. “You are getting heavier and heavier every day.”

“And you are hogging my daughter!” I interjected stealing her from his arms. “I barely get to see her as it is!”

“Well sorry, Princess,” Hoseok grinned before smacking my butt. I gasped and whipped around.

“You did not!” I cried out, my cheeks turning red. Yoongi, Namjoon, and Jin turned around to see what the commotion was all about as Jimin grinned.

“What are you going to do about it?” Hoseok taunted before walking past me. I grumbled and followed along behind him.

“What did you/he do?” Yoongi and V both asked each of us at the same time.

“Slapped her ass,” Hoseok grinned, throwing me a wink over his shoulder while I blushed. Yoongi whistled lowly.

“He like’s you,” Jin said from between his teeth. I shook my head, automatically.

“He can’t like me. Neither of them can like me,” I whispered tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. Madison snuggled into my neck.

“Why not?” Yoongi and Jin both asked, a frown marring their features as we left the restaurant. Macy came and took Madison from me as I kissed her multiple times.

“Bye Mama! Bye Ji’in, H’sook!” She called out as she disappeared inside of the black vehicle. I fought back my tears as I realized that I couldn’t let then get any closer than what we already had.

Madison was already getting too attached and I needed to nip this in the bud right now. Hoseok and Jimin were both known for being a flirt and I couldn’t have her being hurt by either of them if anything was to happen.

“Because this can’t happen,” I motioned with my hands as the other guys stood off about twenty feet away waiting for their car.

“Why not?” Yoongi and Jin both asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Because! I’m a single mother. If anything happens it’s not only me that gets hurt. It’s Madison too! You of all people know that they both are huge flirts,” I snapped and ran my fingers through my hair.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Jin soothed, putting a hand on my shoulder. I stopped dead in my tracks before looking up at him.

“No Jin it really isn’t!” I retorted. “I don’t think I can do this.”

“Sophia,” Jin warned before I backed away from him, looking much like a wild animal. I attracted the attention of the other members of BTS as I continued to back away.

“No, I can’t – it’s too much!” I said before turning and sprinting away.

“SOPHIA!” Yoongi called but I didn’t slow down, nor did I acknowledge any of their calls.

Three days later and I hadn’t left my apartment at all for any time of the day. Macy was exasperated with my depressed state as all I did all day long was play with Madi, eat ice cream, and wallow in my misery whenever Madi wasn’t around.

“You didn’t even break up with any of them!” Macy yelled as the third day dawned bright and early. I groaned as I curled up into a ball on the couch, the credits of a movie playing.

“Come on Sophia, you need to get out there,” Macy tried to yank the covers off of me. I whimpered and shook my head, clutching onto the blanket. After several attempts, Macy shook her head and left me alone.

I started to cry again, not knowing what else to do. It physically hurt to go back to the studio. It hurt to get dressed and get a shower. I was done, and wanted to just sit there. I had enough money in my savings to do so.

I would miss my life as an artist – but if this was the pain that my daughter went through every time that I went on tour, I didn’t want to do it any longer. I got up from the couch and grabbed a container of chocolate ice cream and heard Macy and Madi giggling down the hall. I sighed and went back to my nest burrowing into the pillows and blankets before stuffing myself with ice cream.

“Sophia?” The door creaked open and the seven handsome members of Korea’s K-Pop band BTS intruded in my house. My neck snapped over and my eyes widened as I met the shocked and surprised eyes of BTS.

My hair was greasy – hadn’t been washed in four days, I had a spoon hanging out of my mouth, and my face was pale with tear tracks running down. I had never looked as much out of sorts, at least that they were witness to.

“Sophia honey,” Jin was the first to come over and let me soak up his warmth and hugs.

“I’m so sorry,” I started to sob violently and he shushed me, patting my back.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Jin was quick to pull me onto his lap, resting my head underneath his chin. He started to hum to me, like I was a child. In a way, I suppose I was.

I had never gotten the chance to grieve properly with the death of Jimmy, which was followed close thereafter by the death of his mother. My father wasn’t in the picture any longer, since I had received a phone call about three months after Jimmy’s mother’s funeral that my father had perished. Therefore, I only had Madison and myself.

I couldn’t grieve, when I had bills to pay and work to attend. I forced myself to put a smile on my face every step of the way – even when I had been fired. Then I went to bars and pubs, playing small gigs for money. That is how I was found out two months after I had given birth to Madison.

They offered me a record deal which I took. I became the next Madonna – though with more punk rock attitude. I was still rising to the top as America’s sweetheart with my light southern accent and my ability to play guitar. I wore flowy dresses and skirts, but I still had a more rock edge to my music than other artists.

I was allowed to headline for BTS about three months after my first EP and album had been released. That is how we all met and became friends in the first place. I know that at first, they hated me – due to my looks, not very hip hop I will admit, but we eventually came together as friends.

“Sophia,” Hoseok knelt down in front of Jin and looked up at me. I blushed and looked down. “Hey, don’t cry baby.”

Hoseok reached up and scooped me away from Jin who let Hoseok comfort me. Soon after Jimin joined and sat beside Hoseok, running his hands down my back. I nuzzled into his scent and closed my eyes, hiccupping every now and again.

“Oh, thank God,” Macy came into the room. “Can you get her out of here? Some fresh air, a shower, and some actual food might do her good.”

“Got it, captain,” V winked at Macy who blushed and turned away.

“I’m taking Madi out to the zoo,” Macy sighed and I just nodded my head, feeling more awful than ever. It should be me who takes my kid places, not my personal assistant. When they left we were all left in awkward silence.

“What is going on?” Namjoon asked, breaking the silence after several moments.

“Nothing!” I whispered into Hobi’s neck. He shivered a little before standing up – my person still cradled in his arms. He took a seat on the recliner, me still on his lap, Jimin perched beside us like some sort of knight.

“Cut the shit,” Yoongi stated. I pouted.

“Rude. But am I horrible mother?” I whimpered, staring at my black yoga pant clad legs. I didn’t want to see the judgement in their eyes when they said that I was indeed an awful mother.

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“Why would you think that?” Jimin breathed, resting his cheek on the top of my head.

“Sophia that little girl adores you!” Namjoon interjected. I looked up through glossy eyes and saw that they all looked confused rather than judgmental.

“But she is always with Macy. I’m not even taking her to the zoo!” I cried out and Hoseok started to rub circles on my back.

“Everyone has their off days, Sophia,” Yoongi interjected. “I can remember my own Mum having days in which she didn’t do anything. It’s normal.”

“Yeah, totally,” Jungkook nodded his head. “She loves you, you love her. You said it yourself you didn’t regret having her.”

“But I regret that I won’t be able to give her a normal life,” I breathed and Hoseok sighed.

“Hey, you aren’t a bad parent at all,” Hoseok squeezed me a little tighter. I just shrugged.

“I feel like it,” I mumbled. “You don’t even know what I’ve done.”

“What?” Jimin and Hoseok were the only one who heard me. I just shrugged and pretended like I hadn’t said anything.

“Alright, well Sophia you go get in the shower,” Namjoon pointed to the bathroom. “We will clean up the living room and then we are taking you out to eat somewhere.”

I nodded and got off of Hoseok’s lap who groaned about it the whole time. Finally, I went into my bedroom, grabbed a change of clothes and got a well-needed shower.

I made sure that I shaved meticulously after the past three days of having not left my couch. I washed my hair at least four times, getting all the grease out of it. Then I lathered my body in my favorite Vanilla Bean Noel body wash (I horded bottles in my cabinet).

I pulled on a pair of relaxed fit jean – they were loose with patches all over the front of them. Then I paired that with a tank top that read – Cute But Psycho – a jean jacket, and my favorite pair of high tops. 

All I had to do was add a little bit of chap stick and pull my hair back into a loose pony before I went to open my door, only to find both Hoseok and Jimin on the other side.

“Can we talk to you?” They were fidgety, and I nodded letting them inside.

“What do you need?”

“Why did you run away that day?” Hoseok asked, not sitting down. I stared up into his light brown eyes.

“What do you mean?”

“Yoongi told us that we should question you about it. Why would he say that?” Jimin and Hoseok came closer to me. I was leaning against the wall and just watched the two stalk closer. Finally, they was close to me – our breathes mingling and smelling like mint, though theirs had a hint of coffee lingering. Hoseok’s hands were on either side of my head while Jimin had a hand on my waist.

“Um,” I couldn’t think while they was so close. Hoseok smirked, knowing what he was doing to me. I groaned as his lips almost touched mine.

“What were you talking about?”

“You,” I breathed. “How I was afraid to let you in. How I didn’t want anything to happen to either of us.”

“See,” Jimin grinned. “That was easy.” Then he bent down and captured my lips with his own. I gasped and he took advantage of that.

 

“But we wouldn’t hurt either of you. Madison nor you. You both mean so fucking much to us,” Hoseok stated.

“Language,” I muttered absently and the two laughed.

“Way to kill the moment Sophia.” He rolled his eyes fondly before dipping down to capture his own kiss. “Come on. The guys are waiting.”

“Wait,” I stopped dead and so did they. “What does that make us?”

“It makes us – waiting to go out on our first date. I’ll pick you up tomorrow at six.” Hoseok winked.

“He mean’s we’ll pick you up tomorrow,” Jimin sighed.

“It’s Macy’s day off!” I scrambled after them as they left our room, following them down the stairs. “We need to coordinate!”

“Sophia, just get Namjoon or the maknae to watch Madison,” Hoseok said as we stepped into the living room.

“HEY!” Jungkook cried indignant.

 “Why do we have to watch Madison?” Namjoon asked.

“And why wasn’t I mentioned?” V and Jin both cried out.

“I’m taking Sophia out tomorrow night. I’d take Madison but it is our first date.” Hoseok was laying it on thick.

“He means it’s our first date,” Jimin motioned.

“No problem hyung,” Both the maknae and Namjoon nodded their heads.

“But I’m not good with small children.”

“Of course, that’s no problem,” I soothed. “Hobi was just volunteering you since you are the youngest.”

 “It’s about damn time,” Namjoon sighed as Jin groaned.

“Huh?”

“We bet on when you guys would get together after our first tour together,” Namjoon explained. “Jin owes me 100,000 won.”

We all laughed as Jin fished out the money from his black skinny jeans. Hoseok just pulled me in front of him, wrapping his arms around my torso and Jimin clutched my hand. I was honestly excited for tomorrow.

 

Chapter Text

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Moving to South Korea was hard enough but it followed the death of our older brother. I had to step up to the plate – go to night school, keep up the house, and take care of my little brother all the while holding down a job. Then when I received a job offer that payed way better and could support the both of us better, I jumped on the opportunity. We left the town that we had lived in for years, with tears shed at the realization that we would be leaving behind our parents and our brother, but I assured Samuel that we would come back to visit their graves.

Then we moved to Seoul, South Korea. I found a house outside of the city – nice because Samuel could have space to be a typical preteen/teenager and we could have some privacy. The neighbors were nice – Min Ae Sun and Junmyeon. Ae Sun would watch over Samuel whenever I worked late – saying that she missed having children of her own to watch over.

We talked and had great times the four of us. Ae Sun and Junmyeon became our surrogate parents and Jun Ki and Changgi, two of their sons became our brothers. We would sit in the backyard on chilly nights and Ae Sun would hand me a guitar. I could play a little bit, nothing fancy, just normal chords and carry on a tune, though the Min’s always told me that I had a talent.

This year was going to be the first Christmas we would have in South Korea. Ae Sun invited Sam and I over to their house – her son was home, I never did catch what he did, and they were going to have a party with some extended members of the family.

“Do I have to wear formal?” I asked her while fixing breakfast about four days before Christmas, three days before the party.

“Yeah,” Ae Sun sighed. “It’ll be a fight to get my son to actually dress in good clothes, but I’ll manage. Nothing too fancy, but a nice holiday dress with heels, make-up should do the trick.”

“Got it,” I laughed. “And for Sam?”

“Jeans and a nice shirt should work,” Ae Sun said. I nodded, but then realized that she couldn’t see me.

“Okay. I’ll make sure that I go shopping. SAM! Your breakfast is getting cold!” I yelled as I plated the food. “Sorry Eomma.”

“No problem honey. You’ve got your hands full. A teen and a full-time job,” Ae Sun laughed. I did the same as Sam came flying into the kitchen. He reached for the plate to take it god knows where when I stopped him.

“Where do you think, you are going?” I narrowed my eyes at him and he stopped in his tracks.

“Come on sis! I have one more level!” He pleaded with me. I shook my head and pointed to the seat.

“Samuel, this is one of the only times during the day that I get to see you. Sit down,” I motioned and he did as I said before grumbling to himself. I rolled my eyes and wiped the counter off before starting to rinse the dishes.

“Alright I’m going to let you go. My oldest seems like he wants to kill my youngest right now,” Ae Sun chuckled and I could hear shouts echoing through the phone.

“Alright. See you in a couple of days. I’ll bring something.”

“You don’t have to,” Ae Sun protested.

“Don’t worry. It’ll be fun!” I grinned and then we ended the call.

“How is everything?” I asked Sam as I sat down with my bowl of oatmeal, a cup of fruit and a yogurt.

“Fine. School’s school. I’m glad we are done for the semester,” Samuel sighed. I nodded my head as well.

“Ae Sun invited us over for a Christmas party. She said you can wear a pair of nice jeans, nice shoes, and a nice shirt,” I told him. He nodded.

“Great,” I sighed as I thought about what I was going to wear. “I need to go shopping though. Come with me tomorrow?”

“Sure,” Samuel nodded his head. I was so grateful to have a kid like Samuel. He wasn’t perfect – moody like other teenagers, but at least he was willing to help me out. I could leave him a list of chores, and when I got home they would be done to the best of his ability and his homework would be completed.

“Alright buddy,” I kissed the top of his head as I got up from the table.

“I’m not a child,” Samuel grumbled, but I just ruffled his brown locks.

“I have to go to work. I left a couple of things to do – just please put your dishes in the dishwasher when you’re done? I left twenty dollars on the table for lunch. Have fun!” I yelled at him as I gathered my items for work. He yelled an affirmative as I left the house.

I juggled my bag as I fumbled to unlock the car door. I noticed a frowning guy over at Ae Sun’s; assuming it was the Idol son I waved. He did so back, but it was clearly hesitant. Six other people around him waved as well. I grinned and left for work, jamming out to the radio which was playing She’s Kinda Hot.

The next morning dawned bright and early and I hurried to get out of the house. I knew that I would have to beat the shoppers so I started on breakfast early in the morning and then woke up Sam.

“We have to go this early?” Sam complained. I rolled my eyes at the teenage boy.

“Yes, we do. It’s going to be a nightmare if we don’t beat the people there!” I exclaimed and he rolled his eyes.

“I wouldn’t have agreed if I knew you were going to wake me up at the ass crack of dawn,” Sam grumbled. I smacked him lightly in the back of the head.

“Language,” I warned him before eating my own breakfast. Then the two of us were off – the cold already seeping into our bones. I was having a difficult time feeling my feet.

We got to the mall and there were luckily parking spaces available. The two of us parked and then went inside. I went to a shop that I knew of and started looking through the racks of clothing.

Samuel was a saint; he sat down in the chairs and either shook his head yes or his head no whenever I would come out in a new dress. Finally, I put on a red dress. The left sleeve hung loose, the right was just a strap held up by a beautiful sparkly pin.

“Wow,” Samuel said with a smirk. “You’ll knock them dead.”

“You like it?” I asked him. He nodded his head and I went back into the dressing room to change. Then I perused the shoes, finding a pair of gold platform heels to wear with it.

“Do you need anything?” I asked him. Sam nodded his head.

“Santa to bring me everything in the world!” He chuckled as I lightly smacked him with my bag.

“Seriously now,” I asked again.

“No, Mom, I think I’m good,” Sam said sarcastically.

“Do you need a new shirt for Ae Sun’s party?”

“Well we can look,” Sam sighed, hating this part of clothes shopping – shopping for himself. We picked out a very nice black button up that looked really good on him as well as a new pair of black Vans.

“Thanks Sammy,” I wrapped him in a one-armed hug and he laughed for a few moments as we headed outside. Then we went home, where I hung up the dress and got ready for work.

I dressed in a pair of high waisted white jeans, a cropped white tank, a white blazer, my white heels, and pearls. Then I French braided my hair, pulling it to the side and into a bun at the ends.

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At lunch my phone rang and I picked it up to see Ae Sun was calling me.

“Hey Eomma,” I greeted her with a smile.

“Can you come over after work tonight?” She asked, sounding stressed. I immediately nodded my head.

“Sure, what’s wrong?” I asked sitting back.

“Nothing is wrong, I just need someone to put the casserole in the oven and take it out,” Ae Sun said. I nodded my head.

“Sure thing,” I answered. “Don’t worry about a thing Eomini.”

“Good. You can let yourself in. I should be home around 6:40.” Ae Sun said.

“Okay,” I said before I heard a knocking on my door.

“My son and his friends should be home, but don’t worry about them,” Ae Sun said.

“Gotcha. I’ve gotta go,” I said as the secretary peeked her head inside the door.

“Okay. Thanks a million.” With that my conversation was over. I spent the rest of the day helping them with the edits for the manuscripts that my boss wanted confirmations about by Tuesday.

“Have a good night,” the secretary told me as I walked out. I nodded and waved before getting into my car. I sent a quick text to Sam telling him that Ae Sun needed me to cook dinner for her tonight, so he could order Chinese for the both of us. I would be home shortly before 7.

Then I pulled up into the Min’s driveway, making sure that I wasn’t blocking anything or that I wouldn’t have any trouble getting out. I put the car in park, noticing the three beautiful black sports cars sitting in the driveway. I got out and locked the car before letting myself inside the house with the key Ae Sun gifted me.

I sighed and put my bag on the island that separated the kitchen from the dining room as well as my blazer before getting to work. The casserole was easy – Ae Sun had everything already made, so I didn’t have to worry about that. I just had to preheat the oven and pop it in. But I decided to make dessert since she wasn’t home to do so, and set about making my fancy pudding cups.

I plugged in my phone to the speakers and started to hum and dance all around as I whipped up the dessert – being sure not to get anything on my white clothes. I never noticed the audience that I was gathering and continued my moves all around as I set about making the perfect dessert.

Then came on a Big Bang song, which I started to dance along with. I heard some giggles and looked behind me to see both Jun Ki and Changgi laughing. I frowned at them and pouted before screaming. They both jumped while seven other people made themselves known at that point.

“Damn girl,” Jun Ki complimented me.

“Keep walking punk,” I rolled my eyes at him as I finished the dessert and put them in the fridge. Just then the timer went off for the casserole so I pulled it out of the oven. I set it down on a cooling rack in the middle of the table before pointing a spoon at Changgi.

“Set the table,” I glared at him and he immediately snapped to attention, saluting me.

“Ma’am, yes ma’am!” I rolled my eyes before pulling off my apron. “Your mom should be here in a bit.”

“What are you wearing!” Jun Ki cried out protectively.

“Clothes. What are you wearing?” I answered blandly folding up the apron and putting it back in the drawer.

“But,” Jun Ki sputtered while Changgi just shook his head.

“I did wear a blazer,” I raised my left eyebrow challenging him to say anything else.

“I’m home!” Ae Sun called out. I nodded to them all.

“My cue to go. I have an angsty teenager who is probably surrounded by Chinese takeout right now,” I grinned at them all. I hugged Jun Ki and Changgi and then Ae Sun when she came into the room. I nodded to the other seven before I grabbed my bag and blazer.

“Thanks love!” Ae Sun called out as I exited the house.

“See you at Christmas!”

 

The next two days flew past – luckily Christmas Eve fell on Saturday this year so I didn’t have to worry about anything. I spent my day humming Christmas carols and making baked goods to take over to Ae Sun’s Christmas party. Once I was finished with those tasks, I had to iron Sam’s clothing, get a bath, and then get ready.

“Sam, are you ready?” I yelled up the stairs as I hopped around on one foot trying to slip on my shoes. I finally got them onto my feet and waited for Sam to make his way down here.

“I’m here,” Sam giggled as he hopped down the stairs, like a child who has had way too much chocolate. I rolled my eyes affectionately at my little brother who was now taller than me as he escorted me to Ae Sun’s house.

“You are here!” Ae Sun opened the door and took the trays from my hands. I laughed and hugged her back.

“I brought treats!” I sang out and she herded me inside, took my platters and led me into the kitchen.

“For Heaven’s sake take off that leather jacket,” I looked around to see the seven guys from the couple of days before who were grinning at Liz and I. “This is my son, Yoongi, and his friends, Jungkook, Jimin, Taehyung, Jin, Namjoon, Hoseok, and Namjoon.”

“Pleasure to finally meet you all,” I grinned at them as I pulled off my leather jacket. Ae Sun smirked when she saw what I was wearing.

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“You look good honey!” She winked at me as Sam followed behind me.

“That’s what I told her. I’m going to have to beat guys off her with a club tonight,” Sam grumbled before grabbing a glass of champagne, which I quickly stole and handed him a glass of punch. “You are no fun.”

“It’s in my job description to not be fun,” I laughed at him sipping the champagne and curling my nose up at it.

“You don’t like it?” Ae Sun laughed and I rolled my eyes.

“Not particularly,” I stated dryly before handing it off to her.

“This one is actually good,” Ae Sun teased and I curled up my lip.

“I prefer my drinks to be a little – less drinks,” I laughed at her and she rolled her eyes.

“Because someone isn’t much fun,” I rolled my eyes.

“It’s in my job description,” I hummed and sat down on the counter grabbing a cookie.

“Ew,” Sam grumbled looking at the icing loaded onto the cookie.

“You’re just jealous,” I bit into the cookie and savored the thick icing that I spread over the cookies.

“No, that’s just plain disgusting,” Sam grumbled finding a semi-normal cookie.

“Nuh-uh,” I swallowed my cookie before ruffling his hair a little. He smacked my hands away.

“I spent hours on that!”

“It looks messy anyway,” I countered.

“Exactly! I spent hours making it look like that!”

“Teenagers,” I sighed to Liz. “I’ll never understand them.”

“You’re not that old yourself!” Sam shouted as he exited the room grumbling about older sisters and ruined hair.

“Is it just me or is he worse than a pubescent girl?” I questioned Ae Sun who just shook her head.

“Really, honestly?” I questioned. Then I turned to the other seven guys in the kitchen. “Am I missing something? Are they supposed to act like that?” I asked them, waving my hand wildly towards the teenager who left.

“Well Jungkook did,” Namjoon laughed drinking from his glass. Jungkook rolled his eyes and shoved his friend. “But seriously, there is probably a girl here that he fancies.”

“No,” I gasped. “My little boy can’t fancy a girl!” I looked at Ae Sun in horror.

“Honey, he’s going to grow up,” Ae Sun knew my reasoning behind why I didn’t want him to grow up.

“But,” I gaped at her not wanting this statement to be true. “He can’t grow up! What if he wants to be like Jimmy and - ”

“Honey, you are going to have to let him pursue his dreams,” Ae Sun frowned and set her glass down. “I didn’t want to let Yoongi go around the world as a musician, but I did. He’s happy, and that is what counts.”

“But your son isn’t in a career that could kill him!” I argued, feeling the familiar feeling of panic build up in my body.

Most of the guys laughed at my reasoning. The seven shared looks like they knew something that I didn’t know at the moment. I rolled my eyes and drank some more from my glass, my hands shaking as I thought about what I would do if Sam followed in Jimmy’s footsteps.

“I need some air,” I gasped, slipping off the counter and clutching my cookie and drink in hand. I made my way to the back door where I stood on the patio and just looked up at the stars.

“You okay?” A voice cut through the silence and I turned to face the individual who had followed me outside. It was Seokjin.

“Yeah,” I breathed, spinning around again wrapping my arms around my torso.

“Are you cold?” Seokjin asked, coming near to me. I shook my head in the negative before I felt something warm and soft wrap around my body. “Here.”

“But I wasn’t cold?” I questioned him and he only grinned at me. I rolled my eyes at the man standing in front of me before sighing. “Thank you.”

“Your mouth may say that you aren’t cold, but your body says differently,” Seokjin ran a hand through his pink hair. I nodded my head before we lapsed back into silence. “What’s going on?”

“What do you mean?” I tried to dodge the question.

“Your freak out in the kitchen?” Seokjin reminded me. I avoided his eyes, but he put a finger underneath my chin to turn my face towards him.

“Well, I’ve had to become like Sam’s mother in the past year,” I wrapped my arms around my waist. “Our older brother died over in Iraq so we have had to step up to the plate. He’s a great kid, I just worry that he’s going to join the army and never come back.”

“Aw I’m sorry to hear about that.” Seokjin looked genuinely sympathetic about what had happened. “I don’t know what to say.”

“That’s fine,” I said to him. “I’d rather you be at a loss for words rather than saying something artificial.”

“It must be hard though. You had to grow up and take care of a child when you yourself were barely a child.” Seokjin said before motioning towards a bench on the edge of the path. I gratefully took a seat, happy to get off my feet.

“It wasn’t that bad,” I smiled at him. He did that suave move guys do when they stretch their arm, casually, across the back of the bench. I wanted to roll my eyes at such a cliché move, but I didn’t dare.

“Well I can’t imagine it myself,” Seokjin said with a sigh. “I took care of my boys – I still do, but I can’t imagine being solely responsible for them.”

“I think you would do fine,” I said to him, patting his skinny jean clad knee. "It was difficult but I did it.”

“I can imagine. How old were you?”

“Nineteen. I’m twenty now and we’ve gotten into the swing of things. He helps with the chores, I bring home the money and food. He’s a great kid, I just dislike the whole growing up thing.” I sighed and leaned back, letting my head rest on Seokjin’s arm.

“I think most people do,” Seokjin agreed with me, before cautiously draping his hand over my shoulder. I didn’t protest so he added more weight onto the hand, which seemed to radiate heat through the leather jacket.

“So, Mr. Kim, what do you do?” I asked him, turning towards him.

“I am an Idol,” Seokjin shot me a sly grin.

“No, seriously,” I said, smacking his shoulder playfully.

“I’m not kidding,” Seokjin protested and shoved me gently. “Have you heard of the group BTS, Bangtan Sonyeondan?”

“Hmm,” I scrunched up my eyebrows thinking on it. “I think the name is familiar. Don’t you guys do that song, Blood Sweat and Tears?”

“Exactly,” Jin laughed, it was squeaky and sounded like a windshield wiper.

“So you are a boyband?”

“Well, we are all kind of in a group. Ours happens to be successful,” Seokjin smirked. I rolled my eyes.

“So what type of music are y’all into?” I asked, a little bit of my Southern accent slipping through.

“Y’all?” He grinned at me, playfully. My cheeks flushed.

“Southern raised,” I admitted, pressing my hands to my reddened cheeks. Seokjin chuckled.

“It’s cute, sugah,” he imitated the accent and endearment making me laugh. “Well we wanted to create a mix between pop and hiphop.”

“I feel ya,” I hummed in appreciation. “Epik High, Biggie, and all the other classics were your inspiration huh?”

“Exactly!” Seokjin seemed pumped that I actually knew some of the best bands out there. I learned more about him that night as we just stayed outside on the patio, with the party waging on inside the house.

I told him all about my life – he seemed saddened that I only had Sam left in my family. He was allergic to cats – I loved them but didn’t have time to actually adopt one. He had two sugar gliders named Eomuk and Odeng who he showed me photos of.

“Seokjin, hyung, where are you?” We both looked up to see a drunken Hoseok stagger out of the house. “Oh, get some hyung!” Hoseok said before vomiting on the back lawn. I winced and we both got up to help Hoseok inside and to Jin’s car.

“I’ve got to take him home,” Seokjin sighed, shutting the door on a sleeping Hoseok.

“No worries,” I laughed lightly. “I have to go round up Sam and get us both home. It’s getting late.”

“Here,” Hoseok held his hand out for my phone. I handed it to him – he laughed at the case. “Really?”

“Hey it’s appropriate!” I whined at him.

“Well I guess I’d rather have you be sarcastic than punching people,” Seokjin shook with laughter as he added in his information. “Call me tomorrow okay?”

“Wait!” I knocked on his window. He rolled it down with a raised eyebrow. “Don’t you want your jacket back?”

“Give it to me tomorrow,” he winked before blowing me a kiss goodbye. “See you tomorrow, princess.”

I grinned as I watched him pull out of the driveway, waving the whole time. Then I went inside to round up Sam who was indeed talking with a girl. I bid Ae Sun and Junmyeon a goodnight before we left.

“Goodnight Sam,” I said to him as we stood upstairs.

“Goodnight sis,” Sam yawned and went into his bedroom. I grinned as I thought about seeing Seokjin tomorrow before I realized that it was Christmas.

~ Seokjin you do realize tomorrow is Christmas, right?

~Dammit! I forgot that. I’ll be at Eomma’s tho 2morrow

~So will I. C u then?

~U’ve got it princess. Sweet dreams

~Goodnight Seokjin. Merry Christmas!

Chapter Text

A/N: I just wanted to say thanks to everyone for reading this fiction. I am also grateful to those who have caught the fact that I had published this on another website under my other name. I appreciate everyone's efforts in trying to stop the plagiarism, but alas, it is my own stories that I am modifying. But please if it is found anywhere else, please bring it to my attention. I appreciate the love! Enjoy. On another hand, I just realized all of my Taehyung stories are sad. Perhaps that is because he has been looking so sad lately? Anyway I will try to modify a few other's that are nicer for Tae.

 

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He was so sweet yet so childish at times. Like right now you two were arguing because of a bruise! Seriously? It was no big deal, you had just bumped into the kitchen counter apparently a little too hard. 

"I'm just saying Y/N!" Taehyung stressed. You just shook your head.

"It's just a bruise Tae!" You said back, your temper beginning to boil over. "It will heal!"

"Y/N I'm just worried about you!" Taehyung said, his caramel eyes looking worried. "You've been getting bruises more and more. Plus you're tired all the time and have lost your appetite. Please let me take you to a doctor?"

Sighing you feel your anger deflate. Taehyung was worried, but you weren't. Yes of course you were abnormally tired, spending more time in bed than up and about, your skin was paler than normal, night sweating, loss of appetite, and the unexplained bruising. Well it wasn't unexplained, but even if a part of your body came into contact with any kind of surface it would bruise, whether or not it was a hard hit. 

"The guys are concerned about you as well, Y/N," Taehyung tried to appeal to your senses. Finally you nodded your head.

"Fine. But if there's nothing wrong, then leave it alone?" You snap before walking back up the stairs. You were so tired and the bed was so welcoming right now. 

"Good night," Tae kissed your forehead as he slipped underneath the covers. You stirred and mumbled a love you before falling asleep once again. 

"Jagiya wake up," Taehyung pressed kisses to your face and neck. Startled you woke up and looked up at him. "I got you a doctor's appointment for eleven. Come on! Get dressed and try to eat something." 

Nodding you got out of bed and went into the bathroom where you got a shower, throwing the sweat soaked clothing into the hamper. Then you wrap a towel around your body and go into the bedroom in order to find some clothes. Giving up on wearing your jeans since they were too big now, you just decide to go with a pair of yoga pants, a sports bra, and one of Taehyungs Gucci shirts on. 

"Looking good Jagiya," Tae said with a smirk as you emerge from upstairs fifteen minutes later. 

"Shut up," you mumble, but have a small smile on your face. 

"I think that shirt looks way hotter on you than it ever did on me," Tae got up and gently cupped your face with his hands. He gave you a kiss and then guided you to a seat where a plate was waiting as well as a cup of orange juice. "Try to eat, okay?"

"Okay," you smile weakly at him and begin to pick at your food. Half an hour later you push the still nearly full plate away from you. Tae frowned but said nothing, instead collecting the plate and after scraping the food into the trash bin, putting it into the sink.

"We need to go to the doctors now," he said. You nod and get up to collect your sneakers or trainers, and purse before meeting Taehyung in the hallway. The ride to the doctor's office is mostly silent, filled with the soft sound of music playing. Tae had Yoongi’s mixtape in, but neither of you were really paying attention as you both were nervous and anxious about the things that the doctor might reveal.

Anyways, the doctor's visit was boring at first. The guy seemed like he didn't really even care that Taehyung was concerned for your health, until we told him about the bruising issue and the loss of appetite. He left the room quickly, which made you look at Tae in alarm.

"Don't worry Y/N," Taehyung said voice sounding weak. The doctor came back with several nurses who took blood samples. You hated the needles so clung to Tae's hand. Finally everything was done and the doctor told the both of you that he would call us tomorrow if anything showed up abnormal on the tests. You left and met the guys at the lamb skewers restaurant where they demanded answers which of course you couldn't offer. 

The next morning you were awoken by the sound of a phone ringing. Not paying it any mind, you snuggled back into the pillow as Taehyung ran to grab the phone. 

"When should we go?" Tae was saying. Blearily you rolled over to face your fiancé who had a stricken look on his face. "Alright. I'll let her know. Thank you Doctor."

"What's happening?" You asked, sitting upright.

"You're results came back. They want more conclusive testing done, Y/N." Tae said dropping the phone onto the bed. "Get dressed. We are going to hospital for the rest."

"Okay?" You didn't understand why he was looking so stressed. There had to be something that he wasn't telling you. But you didn't question it, just got ready and went along for the drive. 

They did more blood tests before shooing the both of you into the waiting room. About three hours later they called you into an office where nervously you tapped your fingers.

"Miss Y/L/N, Mr. Kim, it appears as if it is leukemia," the doctor said looking at you with pity. The world stopped and your heart did too. You were in a daze as Tae gripped your hand tightly. 

"What?" You finally managed after the doctor continued to talk for a while. He looked startled. 

"Y/N this is treatable. In fact many individuals who have leukemia go into remission - "

"There's been a mistake," you cry standing up. "No. Someone else's blood work got mixed up with mine. It's not possible!"

"Y/N!" Tae stood up and brought you into a hug. "It's okay. Baby I'm here. It's okay. Sh." He stroked your hair and soothed you as if you were an infant. At the moment that's what you felt like - like a child. "When do the treatments begin?"

"In two days. You'll be there with her right?" Taehyung nodded and the doctor handed him a chart with the times of the treatments, et cetera. 

We had to tell the boys about the prognosis. They were all stunned but promised that they would be with you every step of the way. Which was a lie - tour was resuming in about a month. But they promised. 

The first few treatments were very rough. You had to have a PICC line inserted into your chest cavity, so that the treatments would be able to reach the veins. Then you vomited nonstop as the toxins entered your veins and coursed through the intricate pathways all through your body. Tae, Jimin, and Jungkook were there for you at every treatment - holding your hair, reading a book, singing. Jin made sure that he made your favorite food whenever you got home, so that you could relax. Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hobi were total sweethearts and took to creating a nest for you in the living room, complete with movies and books. 

Jimin was the one that comforted you when your first clump of hair fell out. Taehyung and Jungkook had left to get some ice cream when you ran the brush through your hair and noticed a huge clump on the floor. You cried about the loss of your hair and Jimin rocked you back and forth. 

"It's okay, Y/N," Jimin crooned. "It's just hair. It'll grow back." Tae found you like that when he got home and rushed to comfort you. Finally you managed to choke out one sentence.

"Cut it." 

"What?" Tae said. You looked up at him with red rimmed eyes. 

"If you cut it, it will be shorter and perhaps not as noticeable. Please?" You begged. Tae finally nodded before motioning to Jin. Jin left to call the stylist noona. An hour later the blond/pink haired woman sauntered into the bedroom. 

"Everyone out!" She motioned. They left and she cut your hair stylishly short. You thanked her as she helped you wash it and gently brushed it out. She didn't mention the amount of hair that you lost as she brushed through the short locks. Finally when it was done and styled the boys came back in and smiled. 

"You look gorgeous," Tae said kissing you gently. You smiled tiredly before shutting your eyes and yawning. "Get some rest, yeah?"

You were dreading the end of the month as it meant that the boys would have to resume their tour. They talked to their managers who allowed you to come on tour with them! It was great, though you felt insecure as the majority of your hair was gone. The treatments continued in various hospitals, but you didn't care as it meant that they were near to you. 

Jimin lent you some of his headscarves so that you weren't so insecure about being out in the public. Tae thanked him as it meant that you weren't sequestered into the hotel rooms. Everything was fine until one night when you collapsed, blood dripping from your nose. The guys were at their concert so they didn't find you until nearly two hours after the collapse. 

The hospital staff reassured the guys that it was normal. Normal for people to be dying - normal for the cancer to ravage an individuals body like that - normal to collapse in a pool of blood gushing from your nose. Everything was normal - though they did give you a blood transfusion to replenish the blood lost. 

"How are you feeling?" Tae asked quietly while you were all sitting in the hotel room. 

"Fine Tae," you replied quietly. He nodded for a moment.

"I think it would be better if you went to stay with my mum," Tae spit out. You looked at him confused.

"Is it because of the collapse?" You asked, tears glistening in your eyes. He shook his head. "It won't happen again! I promise Tae! I'll be good!"

"Y/N!" Tae gathered you into a hug and rocked you back and forth. The other guys also brought you into a hug. "It's not about that. I just don't think that you are benefiting from this environment. My mum could watch you so that if something does happen again, you're found in time."

"Okay," you say sadly. That night he keeps you close to him in the bed. His tears feel hot against your bare scalp. The next day you board a plane and go to live with his Eomma and his step-father. 

"I want to go!" You begged. It had been two months since the guys had sent you to live with Eomma and it had been nearly a month since you had to stay at the hospital after getting a severe infection that nearly killed you. 

"You are still too weak," the doctor argued and shook his head. 

"Please?" You begged and the doctor hesitated for a moment before shaking his head. 

"I'm sorry but it's not possible. You are still too weak and your immune system couldn't handle being around that many people," he said sympathetically. "I really am sorry."

"Sorry honey," Eomma said to you patting your hand. "Do you want me or one of the girls to stay with you?"

"No. That's okay. I'll be fine. Just make sure that Tae and the guys know that I wanted to meet them at the airport okay?" You said. She nodded and left with Hyein and Saerin. They were all going to the dorms to welcome the boys and then they were all coming here to see you before going to their own families. 

"Come on sweetheart!" The nurse came in about an hour later for the chemo treatment. You let her wheel me down the hall and into the oncology ward where they began the treatment. When it was finished you felt really weak and sick, but didn't say anything as they wheeled you into your hospital room. 

"Jagiya!" Tae jumped up and carefully knelt to gather you into a gentle hug. You smiled and let your head rest on his shoulder, breathing in the unique scent of Tae. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," you say, bending the truth a little. "How was tour?" 

"Good," Jungkook chuckled moving to take your fiancé’s spot. Jin, Jimin, Namjoon, Hobi, and Yoongi were all next in line to give you a hug. 

"People asked about you," Jimin said with a grin. 

"When are you able to leave?" Jin asked frowning at the room. You laugh and let Tae help you out of the wheelchair. He was gentle with you and set you down on the white bed. Thankfully they let you keep on normal clothes, sweatpants and shirts so that no one else in the room got an eyeful. 

"I dunno Jin," you say as Tae sits behind you. He pulls you into his chest, his legs coming to rest on either side of your body. "The doctors say that my immune system is too wrecked. I'm too weak and fragile. The germs could kill me."

"Aw but I miss you!" Hobi said pouting. You smile.

"Miss you too Hobi." 

The guys were going to be staying for a few days before going to visit their families. You were happy and excited especially as they brought you different little souvenirs from across the globe. Jungkook being the cheeky lad that he was got you a shirt with his face on it which caused Tae to mock punch his band mate. Jin got you different boxes of chocolate which you appreciated, Hobi with different snacks. Jimin and Yoongi got you several different keychains and necklaces from each place, and Namjoon brought you a whole box of old books. 

"Are you okay baby?" Tae asked later that night. He was staying the night and the nurses didn't mind. You nod your head absently. "You've gotten so skinny and pale. I'm worried I might lose you."

"Don't say that Taehyung," you say. It was true. Your skin was stretched over your bones and your skin was abnormally pale and cold. The chemo was hell on your body - literally prolonging the agony of you dying. 

"I got you something too," Tae said, breathing into your ear. You shiver and turn to look at him in wonder. He hands you the object that he had been keeping in his pocket the whole time. 

"Tae," you breath looking at the object. It was an antique locket with a picture of you and Tae on one side and the guys and you inside. 

"I love you, Y/N," Taehyung said putting the locket around your neck. "Always and forever."

"I love you too," you kiss him hard, then feel the blood begin to pour from your nose. 

"NURSE!" Taehyung screamed cradling your head in his hands. You smile at him, the last smile for a long time.

"I love you Kim Taehyung. Don't forget me, but remember to let me go yeah?" You say with a smile as your head is filled with the memories of the times you spent together. 

"NO!" He cries out, clutching your hand tightly. "Y/N I can't let you go."

"It's time Tae. . . I just had to see you and the guys one last time. I've been dying since I got here. I love you, always and forever," You smile thinking of what heaven must feel like. "Let me go now. I can't go if you don't let me go."

"I love you. I'll see you up there, yeah?" Taehyung said tears sparkling in his beautiful caramel eyes. With one last breath you grin and wipe his tears away before your heart monitor flatlines with a loud BEEEEEPPPPPPP!

"Come on hyung," Jungkook said sadly to his best friend who after seven years still came to visit your grave. A beautiful black, highly polished rock. 

Here lies Y/N Y/L/N
Y/B/D to January 2th 2018
Daughter, Friend, Lover

They say nothing lasts forever,
We'll have to prove them wrong.

Always and Forever.

"Always and forever baby," Taehyung said before getting up and walking off with Jungkook. 

Chapter Text

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It was a big day for Jimin today, so you knew that you would have to conceal the fact that you were sick. If he knew that you were sick then your loving boyfriend would not go to the awards show and that wasn't acceptable. So you conceal the fact that you don't feel good.

"Y/N are you feeling alright?" Taehyung asks, noting the fact that you have been quiet for the majority of the day. You quickly nod, but feel the world start to spin. You have to grip the edge of the counter in order to not fall onto your head. Tae puts his hand onto your forehead and frowns. "You feel kind of hot. . ."

"TaeTae please don't tell Jiminie," you beg your boyfriends best friend. Tae and Jimin had went out for a guys' night and Tae was too drunk to go back to his own apartment so he stayed over at your shared flat.

"Boo," Tae started. You shook your head as your vision began to swim again.

"No! Tae I'll just take like five aspirin or Paracetamol," you beg. He sighs. "I'll take it easy tomorrow, please? I don't want Jimin to miss out on this awards show. You know he will if he knows!"

"Fine. But if you get worse I'm going to tell him," Tae warned. You nodded and then Chim spoke making you both jump.

"Tell him what?" Jimin croaked, hungover from the night before.

"What she's getting Jin for his birthday," Tae said lying to his best friend. You felt awful, but you also knew that there was going to be no way that Jimin would let you or even himself attend the show tonight.

"Oh," Jimin muttered before pressing a kiss to the back of your neck. You chuckled nervously and turned around.

"I'm going to go get a shower," you announce before walking carefully up the stairs and into your ensuite bathroom. While the water was warming you quickly take five Paracetamol tabs and get into the bath.

Throughout the day the other guys give you concerned looks as you were too quiet. You didn't want to talk much in order to give away the raspyness of your voice or the fact that your stomach was rolling with the fever that was overwhelming your body. You bundled up, warm leggings and one of Jimin's favorite hoodies, even though it was nearly 80 degrees outside.

"You alright?" Hobi asked you concerned when you told them that you were going to get ready for the awards show tonight.

"I'm fine Hobi," you say quietly but firmly. Tae presses his lips together but doesn't say anything. Hobi nods his head but doesn't look quite convinced and neither do the others barring Jimin. You get dressed in the outfit that the cordi-noonas had picked out for you a week ago and do your hair and makeup before quickly taking another five tablets.

"Whoo!" Jungkook whistles at you as you descend the stairs - with a death grip as you don't want to take a tumble down the stairs. Jimin gives you a soft smile and pulls you to his side when you finally reach the bottom.

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"You look beautiful Y/N," Jimin smiles at you. You blush, not fever induced, and kiss his cheek gently. You giggle as you leave a lipstick mark and quickly wipe it off.

"Let's go!" Tae and Hobi suddenly shout.

Later that night you were barely hanging on. Tae and Jin kept shooting you concerned looks but you kept brushing them off. You felt your stomach swirling as everyone ate dinner, then your dazed and confused mind couldn't focus on the awards ceremony. You heard cheering, but you couldn't focus on anything at the moment.

"Bangtan Sonyeondan!" You hear the host shout and the guys got up to accept their award. You smiled weakly and waved as the guys gave their acceptance speech. The crowd suddenly aww'd and Taemin, sitting behind you gave you a weak push.

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"What?" You murmur.

"Go up on stage!" Taemin hisses to you. Dizzily you get up and walk staggering to the stage. Sweat was building on the edge of your hairline and the lights were making you feel almost drunk. Tae and Jungkook help you onto the stage and brought you nearer to where the boys were standing. Jimin looked paler than normal and almost sick to his stomach.

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"Y/N I have never felt this way about anyone before. I love you with all of my heart and I want you to know this. I also wanted to ask you . . . if you would do me the honor of being my wife?" Jimin knelt down and pulled out a small jewelry box. You feel like the walls are spinning and you try to focus on Jimin but can't. You open your mouth several times to say yes, but everything feels kind of surreal.

Black spots begin to form in front of your eyes and the voices coming from the guys sound so far away. You look down at a stricken Jimin, who suddenly realizes that something isn't quite right as the spinning gets worse. Your eyes roll back into your head before you feel nothing at all. . . .

"Not to tell you!" Tae shouted as your consciousness came back. You blink slowly as you hear the beeping of machines in the same room as you. Hearing you moan they quiet down and you hear multiple pairs of feet come over to your bed.

"Princess how do you feel?" Jimin's face bends over your eyes so that you can look up at him. Blinking tiredly you smile up at your boyfriend.

"I'm tired," you complain. He laughs.

"You gave us quite a scare, Y/N," Namjoon scolds. You turn to look at your best friend. "Why didn't you just tell us you were sick?"

"Because I didn't want to ruin the night for you guys. Jimin would have refused to go and I wanted to go as well," you say, looking down at the white blankets.

"What do you remember from that night?" Yoongi asks, looking at you curiously. You know that something extravagant happened but you just can't remember what that was.

"Honestly not a whole lot," you whisper. "I remember Taemin whispering something to me, and Jimin on his knee . . ." You gasp as it begins to sink in. "Chim?"

"Yes Princess?" Jimin says, his brown eyes filled with his concern and nervousness.

"You proposed?" You ask, tears beginning to well in Y/E/C eyes. He nods.

"Though I've never seen quite a reaction like that before, love," Yoongi laughs. You shook him a glare, the cheeky little . . .

"I'm sorry I passed out on you," you say, feeling embarrassed. Jimin chuckles a little bit.

"No big deal," Jimin nervously rubs the back of his neck.

"It is a big deal Jimin! And my answer is yes," you say. Jimin turns to look at you before kissing you gently much to the displeasure of the rest of those assembled in the room.

"Good, because no wasn't really an option," Jimin growled in your ear before sliding the ring onto your finger.

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Chapter Text

A/N: In the midst of my almost developing bronchitis, after a year of no coughing, here is the latest one-shot. Enjoy!

 

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You groan as the alarm clock goes off at a godforsaken hour. A terrible urge to cough settles in your chest. You cough violently, your whole frame wracking with the force of the coughs that held your own lungs captive. 

"Just what I needed," you mutter before picking up your phone and calling your boss. She understands and bids you to get well. You throw the phone and it bounces on the queen sized bed. Laying back down you whimper as you try not to allow the coughs to escape. 

Falling into a light doze you wake up periodically to use the bathroom and then collapse back down onto the bed. You groan and flip on the television, wanting some sort of noise even if the TV doesn't capture your interest. 

"What do you wanna do, poke her with a stick? Dude! You're not gonna poke her with a stick!” You snort at the line and settle back into bed. About an hour later you open your eyes to see your phone buzzing. You attempt to ignore it, but after the phone stops ringing it starts again. 

52 missed calls. 

75 new messages.

Unlocking the phone you check and see who all has called you on this day. Five of those calls are your mother, seven are from Jin, three are from Yoongi, six are from Namjoon, eight are from Taehyung, ten are from Hobi, twelve are from Jimin and the rest are from Jungkook. 

Where are you? J x

Why aren't you picking up? J x

Those were only the beginning of the text messages that were flooding onto your phone. Groaning you cough, the sound wet and like a rattle sound from the deep caverns you call lungs, and call Jungkook.

"Kook-ah?" You try to sound like nothing is wrong but he picks up on it right away. Or perhaps it was the fact that he came home for a break from tour and you weren't there to greet him?

"I'm nearly home," Jungkook tells you in the calm voice of his. You sigh.

"Jungkook it's nothing to worry about," you try to placate him only to cough into the phone instead.

"You're sick?" 

"I'm fine, Jungkook. Don't worry about me," you soothe, knowing that you need some type of medicine, but also knowing that you don't keep any on hand. Although with the amount of bronchitis and upper respiratory infections that Kook's had you ought to buy stock in the cough syrup company. 

"You don't sound very fine, Y/N," Jungkook scolds before his voice become muffled. You know he is telling someone to do something but what is anyone's guess. "I'm going to be home soon, alright love?"

"Hmm," you hum and drop the phone from your hand. You don't realize that you haven't ended the call and end up coughing up your lungs before burying your face into the silk encased pillow of Jungkook's. You breathe in his scent and fall into a light doze. 

"She's out," you hear what sounds to be Jin say. You mutter and blearily look at the side of your bed where Jin, Jimin, Hobi, Yoongi, and Jungkook are all stood. 

"Hello lovely," Hobi says in a cheery voice. You blink and fall back onto the pillow.

"Don't feel good," you mutter and they all laugh at you. 

"I can't imagine that one," Yoongi says sarcastically. 

"Come on. Take this," Jungkook coaxes coming over towards you with a spoon. You back away knowing how horrid that stuff tastes and shake your head.

"No Kookie. Please don't make me," you beg your boyfriend who looks torn for a moment. 

"I'm sorry, love," Jungkook says before Jin grabs a hold of your body. 

"No!" You protest as Jin wraps his arms around your torso and Jungkook comes closer with the spoon. 

"Open up," Jungkook coos and you frown at him. 

"I'm not - " he sticks the spoon in as you crossly try to yell at your bunny boyfriend. Gagging you want to spit it out but know if you do Kookie will only give you another mouthful. 

"Good girl," Hobi coos patting your head like a dog. 

“Hobi!" You croak before coughing harshly. A pile of phlegm comes up and you frantically reach for a tissue before spitting out the yellow mucus. 

"Oh love," Jungkook says. "You've gotten bronchitis haven't you?"

"I suppose," you mutter before crawling back underneath the covers.

"Have you eaten?" Jin asks. 

"No. 'm not hungry," you grumble and let Jungkook tuck you into bed. He sighs.

"I'll be up with broth and crackers alright?"

For the next week Jungkook takes care of you, making sure that you take the medicine, doesn't make fun of your medicine induced high, and ensures that you eat. Overall he is being very helpful and nice. The other guys come over and keep you both company, but no one can compare to the way that Kookie takes care of you. You feel like a princess when he does that. 

Then two weeks later, when Jungkook comes down with the same infection you make sure that you wait on him hand and foot. He loves you all the more for it.

 

Chapter Text

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 It had been a long day at school. First and foremost your scores had come in – you had only achieved the status of being the fifth in your grade, which was heartbreaking as you had studied and studied in order to be the first! Then you had gotten hit in the face by a football, or soccer ball, on your way to the canteen for lunch after Yoongi had canceled due to unexpected practice, and then you split your pants up the back.

Groaning you set your backpack onto the floor and decided to walk up the stairs to go to your bedroom. Not noticing the rose petals strewn all over the floor as you were in your own thoughts, you paid no attention to the Daegu boy laying across the bed in your shared room. You went over to the closet and picked out your comfortable pants – the ones you only wore when you had a bad day and needed an entire box of chocolates to fix it.

“Bad day?” You jumped as you were sliding the pants up your legs. Turning around you noticed Yoongi sitting up on the bed. You nod and finish pulling up your pants then fling yourself into Yoongi’s arms. His hugs were legendary and you needed the comfort. “What happened?”

Therefore you proceed to tell Yoongi all the problems that occurred throughout your day. He listened to everything that happened as you cried into his shirt, sniffling in his unique scent. The scent of him that made everything alright, which is why you decided from this time forward that no matter what you would bring a sweatshirt of his with you at all times.

“I’m sorry you had a bad day,” Yoongi said sympathetically. “How about we watch movies and eat some chocolate, yeah?”

With tear tracks down your face you nod and let him get up and get your favorite movies from the living room. He comes back with a pound of assorted chocolates and the movies. Then you both settle onto your bed, your head cushioned onto his chest as the movies begin. Yoongi begins to feed you different chocolates – your favorite game. Each of you eat half and decide which one was good.

You both fall asleep, stomachs full of chocolate and the movie still blaring. The next morning you get up and decide to make your wonderful boyfriend a nice cooked breakfast, which consisted of orange juice, pancakes, eggs, and bacon.

“Thank you, love,” Yoongi said smiling as you came into your bedroom with the tray balanced between your hands.

“No thank you Min Yoongi,” you say and set the tray on the nightstand.

“Let’s eat this, yeah?”

Chapter Text

A/N: So in this one Taehyung doesn't lose his girlfriend. Enjoy!

 

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It had been a long stressful day for you. First you were nearly an hour late for work since the alarm hadn’t gone off, then you forgot your wallet on the coffee table so you had no money for food or drink, therefore, there was no money for a cab. As you were walking home Taehyung texted you and asked if you could pick up some groceries for dinner tonight with the guys. Heaving a sigh, you picked up your pace in order to reach the flat and then grab your wallet and go to the store.

Unfortunately fate was not going to let that happen. First off a cabbie splashed you with dirty water completely ruining your outfit and caking mud onto your glasses. Then when you were three blocks away from the flat your left heel broke and your ankle twisted.

Frustrated you drop your keys three or four times, not able to see with the limited vision. Finally once the key unlocks the door you storm into the flat and throw the keys onto the end table. Limping into the house you go up the stairs, leaving a trail of muddy water behind you.

Your ankle was nearly double the size and you let out a frustrated yell as you get underneath the hot water streaming out of the faucet. The tears stream down your face as you hurriedly scrub the muddy water from your hair and body. Finally finished you grab a towel and clean off before grabbing a pair of galaxy leggings and Taehyung’s Gucci sweater.

Going down the stairs you walk into the kitchen and avoiding the trails of muddy water open up the freezer. Grabbing the carton of double chocolate ice cream you dig in, wishing that it would change the day that you just had. Suddenly the door opens and seven guys come in as you are still stuffing your face with the carton of ice cream.

“Y/N?” Taehyung calls seeing the trail of water and the broken heels laying in the entry of the flat. The other guys become quiet when they witness the scene and realize that something is wrong.

“Love?” Jin called out walking into the kitchen, Taehyung not far behind. Instantly your eyes begin to tear as you realize that you forgot about the groceries.

“I’m so sorry!” You cry, throwing the spoon into the sink and slamming the ice cream into the freezer. “I totally forgot! I’ll go get it now . . .”

“Get what?” Taehyung asks you in the slow and deep voice of his. Your knees melt with the need to just bury your head in his chest and rant about the absolutely crappy day that you just had.

“The groceries!” You sigh and shake your head before steeling yourself to go outside. Tae catches a hold of you before you can walk past him.

“Jin-hyung why don’t you and the others figure out what to order for dinner. I’m going to take Y/N upstairs,” Tae said to his eldest hyung. Jin nodded and Tae escorted you up the stairs to your shared room. He sat down on the bed and pulled you down on his lap. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you say, attempting not to let him know the real source of the problem. He has enough of his own problems to stress about - no need for you to add to it. Tae shakes his head and runs his hands over your hair. Finally you let out a sob and continue to cry as he holds you, pressing kisses to your head. You release the entirety of your day through your sobs and Taehyung just continues to rub circles onto your back as your sobs turn into hiccups.

“It’s alright love,” Taehyung says soothingly as he hums to you. “If you want you can just stay here. Go to university and don’t worry about having to go back to work for that man.”

“TaeTae,” you whine and he laughs.

“I know, I know!” Playfully he puts his hands up in the air. Laughing softly you kiss him gently before leaning your head against his collarbone. “C’mon. The guys probably have inhaled the majority of the food by now. Plus we need to reassure them that you’re not dying. I mean you left a huge mess in the entry.”

Going downstairs you noticed with a smile that the guys had cleaned up the entry way, leaving only the trail to the bathroom for you to clean later. Tae put a comforting hand on your lower back and leads you into the living room.

“Thanks guys,” you say as they look up from the couch. Hobi notices your red-rimmed eyes and opens his arms allowing you to let him comfort you as well.

“It was nothing, Y/N,” Namjoon says with a smile.

“Come eat!” Jin chirps, making all of those assembled laugh. “It always makes me happier!”

Chapter Text

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 It had been a horrid day at work – first you nearly got hit by a car as you tried to cross the traffic filled Seoul streets which was something you were definitely not going to tell Jimin, you dropped the last tea bag of your favorite tea onto the floor in the break room, you ended up written up for a verbal statement that had gotten taken out of context, and to top it off you tripped and fell on the way home. Now your knees were bloody, scrapped, and hurt so badly as you limped all the way to your flat.

Then you realized that you left the keys in your office and so therefore you sat there on the stoop waiting for Jimin or someone to come home. You didn’t even bother to knock as you knew that the guys had an interview at 4:30 and probably wouldn’t even be home until well after 6 pm.

Therefore you had nearly a full hour to sit on the stoop in the cold and wait for your adorable boyfriend and possibly his hyungs to stop at your house. You didn't want to bother him during his interview; he would just worry about you the entire time. You started to shiver and regretted having to wear this dumb pencil skirt, thin green top, and blazer. You should be able to wear thick slacks or trousers during the winter months, but your employer doesn’t think that represents the magazine in which you work.

Curling up into a ball, attempting to conserve body heat, you pull the blazer tighter against your torso. Your hands and feet were now numb as well as your nose and lips. Your breath was puffing out in front of you in a white cloud as you breathed in and out. Sighing you waited for over an hour and still no sign of Jimin or any of the guys. Rolling your eyes, knowing that they probably went out for dinner, you leaned your head against the railing and closed your eyes.

“Princess?” Jimin asked, gently shaking your shoulder. Blearily you tried to open your eyes, but you were too cold to do so. You merely hummed a little. Jimin picked you up off the stoop and instructed whoever was with him to open the door.

“She's cold,” you thought that sounded like Yoongi, but you weren’t sure at this point.

“Why was she out on the stoop?” Namjoon asked sounding perplexed.

“Maybe she forgot her keys?” Hobi, definitely Hobi replied.

“I need to get her warmed up,” Jimin said to his hyungs and took you up the stairs. He gently laid you on the bed and began to pull the clothes off your body before picking you up and setting you into warm water. It hurt your cold limbs as well as the scrapes on your knees, so you tried to protest. “Sh, princess. It’s going to be alright. Just let the water warm you up, alright?”

He drained the water from the tub and then put in some more water that was hotter this time. It was soo soothing that you finally fell asleep. The next morning you woke in Jimin’s arms, wrapped in three comforters and encased in his warm clothes.

“Minnie?” You ask sounding confused. He stirred and looked down at you, his dyed blond hair a mess and eyes sleepy.

“Princess!” Jimin quickly woke up and looked concerned. “How are you feeling? You’re finally awake!”

“I feel fine. A little gross as Taehyung would say,” you say sniffling a little.

“What happened?” Jimin asked. You suddenly remembered the events of yesterday and spilled them in one huge breath to Jimin who ran his hand up and down your side. “Aw Princess you could have called me!”

“I didn’t want to disturb you in the middle of your interview,” you admitted and turned your eyes down to the sheets. Jimin brought his small hand up and turned your chin to face him.

“I could have told you where the extra key was located, princess,” Jimin said with a smirk. You laugh a little, which turns into a coughing fit as you realize the error of your mistake.

“Well for future reference let me know ahead of time so that way I don’t freeze on the stoop,” you tease and Jimin winks at you.

“I dunno. It was pretty interesting to get to change you,” your cheeks heat up and your mouth opens in disbelief. Then Chim starts to laugh and you smack him.

“That wasn’t nice Minnie!” You shriek and he gets off the bed. “Make me breakfast!”

“As you wish,” Jimin said with a huge grin on his face.

“Don’t start quoting the Princess Bride Jimin!” You say blushing. He laughs and kisses your cheek.

“Well I think you’d make a wonderful Buttercup,” he says before heading out the door.

“And you a perfect Westley,” you mutter, not realizing that he heard you.

Chapter Text

A/N: I know these are getting repetitive. Sorry. Working on fixing the sequel for Min Yoongi #1. . . . .

 

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Your father had died a few weeks prior, therefore it had been very stressful for you the past few weeks. Your work had been so stressful, trying to meet the deadline for the book you were in the middle of writing. Namjoon was supportive of you, but you had lost your zeal and inspiration for the continuation of the book.

Therefore you were sitting there staring at the screen. Joonie had gone out with the guys in order to give you some space as well as quiet. Little did he actually know, but you were blaring the music through your headset. Rolling your eyes at the screen blinking Chapter 41, you get up and go into the kitchen.

As the tea kettle whistles you pour a cup, only to accidentally overflow the mug. Letting out a yell, you instantly run cold water over the extremity – to be left with a blistering red mark all over your left hand and wrist. Sighing you go back into the living room and stare at the blank screen once more.

After another couple of hours pass you continue to stare at the blank screen. Finally inspiration begins to flow through your fingers and you spend nearly two and a half hours typing madly. However, you forget to plug in the laptop and in the middle of your sentence the computer screen goes black.

“URGH!” You scream just as Namjoon comes through the front door. Yoongi was behind him, but he just backed out of the doorway quietly and told Namjoon he’d see him tomorrow. Joon nodded and quietly put his packages down.

“What’s wrong baby?” Joon asked. You turn to him with wild, tear filled eyes and throw yourself into his arms.

“It was so close, Joonie!” You cry into his jumper. “First I got burnt by the tea, then the stupid computer screen goes black because I forgot to power it! Oh God Joon, I have to send it into my editor tonight by midnight or else I lose the money and the deal!”

“Shh, it’s alright babe,” Namjoon says soothingly running a hand through your long hair. You shiver and lean more into his strong frame, hoping that some of his strength will run into your own body. However, this proves to be a moot point and too soon Joon is pulling away. “Why don’t we go upstairs?”

Meekly you follow him up the stairs and into your room. He goes into the bathroom and begins to run the bath. Joon steers you into the bathroom where you get undressed and slid into the water.

Namjoon had made sure that the water was warm and that your favorite scent – vanilla – was permeated throughout the room. He dimmed the lights and gave you a kiss before leaving you alone in the warm water.

About ten minutes later Namjoon came back upstairs and joined you in the bath. He moved you up so that when you laid down your head was on his chest. He began humming and you fell into a light doze.

“C’mon baby,” Namjoon says, trying to coax you out of the tub to which you sleepily hold up your arms. He chuckles and pulls you up like a child, wrapping a towel around your body. He dries you off and then grabs a pair of his boxers and a tee to clothe you in before tucking you into bed.
Sleepily you fell asleep to Namjoon wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you closer to his body. The next morning you woke up with a start, also waking up Joon who looked at you sleepily.

“What’s wrong?” Namjoon asked sleepily.

“My book!” You exclaim. “I wasn’t able to send it to my editor and now I’m done! My career is over before it even began.” You start to cry and Joon wraps you in his warm arms.

“Hush, baby,” he said into your hair. “Don’t worry. Your book was sent to the editor.”

“How Joon?” You ask tearfully.

“Last night when you were in the bath I took the opportunity to send it in to your editor with a note about what happened,” Namjoon explained. You hug Joon tightly and kiss him excitedly.

“Thank you so much Joon!”

“It’s nothing, babe,” Namjoon says with a smile and a chuckle.

“I love you so much,” you gush feeling lucky to have such a boyfriend like Namjoon.

“I love you too. I couldn’t bear for you to lose sight of your dream,” Namjoon says kissing your head.

Chapter Text

Jungkook called and told me he thought he had a case I might be interested in. I agreed to meet him and that is how I found myself at the scene of a brutal murder at about 2 AM in the middle of February. I had stopped at an open diner and got a hot coffee, which I was sipping as I walked towards the caution tape. I spotted Jungkook and Taehyung, so I increased my pace in order to reach the only two people I was familiar with. I was ten yards from them when a short officer barred my path.

"What do you think you're doing?" He screeched at me. "This is a crime scene! No civilians allowed to get through!" I tried to dodge him, but she quickly stepped in my way again. "If you continue to persist, I will have no choice but to place you under arrest!" My cheeks were burning with embarrassment as well as restrained anger.

"Park, she's with me." Jungkook said from directly beside the evil cop. In his voice I could detect an undertone of coldness, which made this Park cop flinch.

"Who would be with you?" He sneered nastily at him. "You are such a freak!" I saw red at his belittling of Jungkook.

"Hey! He's not a freak." I growled at him through my teeth as I walked underneath the tape. "So if I were you I'd shut up and keep your thoughts to yourself, before I make you. And I can bet you that there will be irreparable damage done to your face." With that I went around him, and stopped directly beside Jungkook and Taehyung.

"You alright?" Taehyung asked me, having noted my embarrassment, as we started to move towards the little home in which the murder had been committed. I laughed a little and nodded my head.

"So why have you called me here?" I asked as we passed other police officials. I noticed a man being taken to a car in cuffs.

"I didn't do it!" The man was screaming. "I would never have killed her!" My skin crawled as I looked at the business man. Honestly I couldn't picture him committing an act of murder. Maybe embezzling but not murder.

"Brutal murder." Jungkook informed me. "Seokjin only called me to see if I could figure out what his motive was."

"A motive?" I asked him, my brow furrowing in confusion. Jungkook wasn't here to catch the killer, which was obvious as they already had the man arrested. So why had Seokjin called him?

"Yeah. The husband is - "

"I don't want my crime scene contaminated!" The nasally voice of Jung Hoseok, head of the NSY forensics division interrupted Jungkook's sentence. We merely ignored him, as usual, but at the last minute I gave him a one finger salute.

Stepping inside the house, I could see the brutality of the murder, it was quite literally painted on the walls. Blood covered the majority of the house, dripping off picture frames, light switches, etc. Luckily I had a pretty thick constitution, and had exhumed bodies before, or else I probably would have vomited. Taehyung inhaled sharply, and looked sick, while Jungkook looked around like he amazed by the sheer quantity of the blood.

"Ahh… Miss Winchester." Seokjin came into the room. The last time we had met had been over eight months ago, when I had impersonated a federal agent. The perks of having a powerful boyfriend, included the smoothing over of my discretions. Seokjin had been informed that the entire matter had been taken care of, so I didn't have to worry about any police matters, or such punishments.

"Detective Kim Seokjin." I greeted him with a slight smile.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, still a little suspicious of me. Which I couldn't blame him for. I didn't exactly give him a great first impression.

"I invited her Seokjin," Jungkook interrupted with a bored tone. He strode forward looking at the blood painted walls of the house.

"What happened?" I asked the Detective as I looked down the hall, noting the hand prints, startling red against the white paint of the hallway.

"The wife was murdered. Tortured by the looks of it." I glanced over at him. He had a sickened look on his face. "Her husband bound her to a chair and using various instruments began to slowly kill her."

"What's wrong?" I asked him, beginning to move down the hallway, following the handprint trail.

"What do you mean?" Seokjin asked, sounding confused at my question. Yeah, I get it, a stupid question while standing in the middle of a murder scene.

"I mean, if the husband did it – it would be considered solved. Shut and close."

"You wouldn't have found the need to call me." Jungkook finished for me. I shot him a glare, before disappearing into the bedroom the wife had been murdered in. There was the chair, in the middle of the floor, with the woman still tied to it. To the side, there was a moved nightstand with several pairs of scissors and knives which had clearly been used tonight.

"Apparently the husband was coming home. From Jeju at 10:30 P.M. when we have estimated the time of death." Seokjin said from the doorway allowing Jungkook and Taehyung to pass through the doorway and enter the room.

"And?" I asked, looking directly at Seokjin.

"The security tapes show him entering the home at 10:07 P.M."

"Yet the husband says he came home at what time?" I asked Seokjin, while Jungkook looked at us both interested.

"12:58 A.M." Seokjin said after looking down at his notepad. I nodded already thinking through the possibilities which could have done this. Demon, ghost, wraith, ghoul, pretty much anything.

"Interesting." Jungkook muttered, still examining the body of the woman.

"Can I get the security tapes?" I asked, standing up, moving out of the way of Jungkook and Taehyung. Seokjin looked torn.

"I can't just give a civilian - " I rolled my eyes and pulled out my phone. Yoongi had still been awake when I left the house, so I didn't feel too guilty about calling him at this hour. Dialing him, I spoke with him briefly and then passed the phone to Yoongi. In twenty minutes, I had a copy of the security footage.

"Satisfied?" Jungkook asked me, once we were all in the back of the cab. I nodded, leaning back in my seat.

"Yeah. I've totally got to get your brother to make me a badge. One that gets me anywhere." I grinned at Jungkook. "One that opens any door I want it to."

"Just pickpocket him. That's what I do." Jungkook said, totally serious. I burst out laughing at this statement.

"You're flat or back to my house?" I asked, stifling a yawn. It was bloody late at night or early in the morning, whichever you want to use.

"Yours." Jungkook said and then was quiet the trip. We finally pulled up in front of the imposing house. Yoongi was still working, I noted as Taehyung paid the cabbie. His study light was still on.

"He's always been like that." Jungkook said to me, before we made our way to the front door. I let us in with the key and we stopped in the hall. I took their coats and hung them with my own on the old-fashioned coat rack before leading them into the living room.

"Wow." Taehyung whistled, looking all around him at the beautifully decorated room. "Nice place."

"Thanks Taehyung." I gave him a smile as I put the DVD into the machine.

"You changed some of the decorations." Jungkook hummed, noting all the changes I had made, sitting on the beautiful black leather sofa.

"Yeah." I smiled, grabbing the remote before perching on the arm of the couch and flicking the tape on. I fast-forwarded the first six hours of surveillance, stopping when we reached 10:05 pm. Looking at the footage, I stopped it when I noticed something very unusual.

"What is it Lia?" Taehyung asked, as I rewound the surveillance footage.

"Look." The husband was seen walking towards the house when he turned and noticed the camera. That wasn't what I was pointing out – it was the silver the eyes shone for several seconds. Taehyung whistled in amazement.

"What is that?" Yoongi's voice startled me. I jumped and nearly fell off the arm of the couch in my haste to look at Yoongi.

"Uh, a shape-shifter." I said, turning to glare at the snickering Jeon Jungkook. He was only snickering at my apparent jumpiness.

"A shape-shifter?" Taehyung sounded skeptical.

"Yeah, a shape-shifter. There's tons of lore on shifters, werewolves are the most popular but there are also skinwalkers." I told him. Yoongi walked away, at my explanation. I just shrugged at this action, as he usually tried to care what I was working on.

"Right so this thing just impersonates husbands to kill their wives?" Taehyung raised an eyebrow at how ludicrous this sounded.

"Perfect way to commit a crime. Pin it on a person everyone would suspect. The husband's targeting their wives is really ingenious," I admitted.

"Huh." Jungkook said. "Why'd his eyes glow silver?"

"People believe that the eyes are the window to your soul. That's probably why. Showing off the inhumane side of the person." At that point I yawned. I mean it was like three in the morning.

"Well, we'll be off then." Taehyung said, getting up. Jungkook opened his mouth, but Taehyung stopped him quickly. Taehyung forcibly pulled a pouting Jungkook to the front door, where after retrieving their coats, they left. I locked the door behind them, before checking that the salt line wasn't broken. Then I shut off everything on the lower level.

I stopped at Yoongi's study, where he had sequestered himself again, after wandering out of the living room, once he had heard what the creature was. I knocked on the impressive oak door and waited for Yoongi's disembodied voice to give me the ok. Finally he did and I walked into his clean and spacious office area.

His study was painted a beige color with all wood furnishings. His huge desk was positioned in much the same way as the United State's President's desk, in front of the huge plate glass window. There was a large stone fireplace in the corner. Ceiling to floor bookcases on the wall opposite the fireplace with two huge leather chairs in front of his desk.

"Helia." Yoongi said looking up from a document he was in the process of writing.

"Yoongi." I greeted, walking across the hardwood floor to perch on the edge of the large leather chair. He looked at me for a moment before giving me a smile.

"What can I help you with?" Yoongi finally asked, setting down his real silver fountain pen, capping it so it didn't leak onto his document.

"Nothing." I replied, stifling a yawn. "I didn't come for you to give me help. I just came to talk to you.” The yawn I had been stifling during our conversation came out.

"Oh?" Yoongi asked amused, leaning back in his chair. "You don't need a badge? One that will unlock any door?" I frowned at him, not amused. Jungkook must have told him.

"Well, yeah, but that wasn't why I came in here!" My frustration was starting to show. Yoongi smiled at me gently, before he got up from his chair.

"No. I wouldn't insult you by saying that, my dear." Yoongi came to a stop beside my chair, and looked down at me. "You're tired."

"Yeah," I agreed, allowing my tiredness to show.

"Go to bed, darling." Yoongi urged me gently.

"Are you coming?" I asked him. He shook his head in denial. "Why not?" I demanded, not liking how he wasn't going to get any rest before tomorrow.

"There's been a situation in Hong Kong." Yoongi said, before turning to look into the fireplace, like it was an interesting piece of art.

"Oh." I blinked. "I understand. They need you to put out a fire." I got up from my chair. "Save the world Yoongi." I had my hand on the doorknob when Yoongi's voice stopped me, dead in my tracks.

"Wait, Helia." I froze, but refused to turn around. "I'll be done in about ten minutes." I turned to face him. I had understood about him needing to put out a fire, but sometimes I needed Yoongi as much as the government did.

"Promise?" I asked him, not daring to hold out hope for such a small favor. He nodded and crossed the room to gently kiss me.

"See you in ten, Helia." Yoongi gave me a smile before disappearing behind his desk once again. With a smile gracing my own lips, I went to his, no our bedroom now. Going into my closet I chose the teal blue silk short pajamas Yoongi had gifted me for Christmas. Then I did my nightly routine, for the second time, and washed my face, brushed my teeth and then my hair.

Leaving on Yoongi's bedside lamp I slipped underneath the black and blue comforter and the fur sheets. Once Yoongi had found out how cold I could get, he ensured that Eva, the housekeeper, buy only fur sheets for winter. He also made sure another blanket was always folded at the foot of the bed. Looking at the clock on Yoongi's nightstand – 4:34 A.M. – I groaned and pulled Yoongi's pillow towards me before falling into a light doze.

"Good night love," Yoongi's voice invaded my drowsiness and I felt a pair of warm lips on my forehead.

"Gi?" I stirred a little and he shushed me before pulling me towards him. I hmmed and rested my head on his arm before falling back asleep.

"DEAN!" I screamed, sitting bolt upright. Yoongi turned to face me from the desk he had in our bedroom.

"Helia?" He put down the file he was reading. I looked up at him with fear evident in my eyes. I felt the burn of tears as the memories of Dean, Lilith, and the hellhounds burned into my mind. "Oh Helia!"

With a sob, I got out of bed and snuggled into Yoongi's lap and his able embrace. He rocked me back and forth on his lap, while my tears stained his dress shirt. After a while, my sobs dissolved, but Yoongi still held me, running his hands over my air, as he knew that I needed the small amount of comfort that he could offer right now.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled into his chest, feeling much like a child due to my outburst. But this case was bringing back memories.

"Sh, it's alright Lia." Yoongi gently soothed me, still stroking my luxurious mane of brown hair.

"It's stupid though." I lifted my head up enough, so that I could look at him. His hands stilled in my hair as I looked into his grey eyes. He was waiting for me to voice my reasoning. "Dean's alive. I know that, yet I'm still haunted by the memories of Dean being torn apart!"

"Helia, it isn't stupid." Yoongi said. "Even though Jungkook isn't particularly fond of me, if something would befall him, it would break my heart." Yoongi looked so vulnerable in that moment, admitting that, that my own heart bled for him.

"Gi," I said softly, raising a hand to his cheek. At that moment Yoongi pulled into a kiss. This one we both tried to battle for dominance. In the end, with a sharp nip to my bottom lip, Yoongi won the battle. I didn't mind though and accepted this defeat, letting him rush my senses, effectively overwhelming me.

"You do things to me, things that I never thought would happen to me," Yoongi said, leading his forehead on mine after our kiss. When he exhaled, I inhaled, which made our closeness seem a little more intimate.

"Well I do seem to have that effect on people," I teased him, feeling breathless. He chuckled before sitting upright.

"Jungkook called me a few hours ago. Wanted me to wake you up so that he could take you to the crime scene again."

"Why?" I asked, my back resting on the unyielding arm of his chair.

"He simply told me to tell you that he said 'think!'." Yoongi raised an eyebrow at me. I laughed at that oh-so-typical Jungkookian statement, before I began to contemplate what he said and what he could mean. Then it clicked.

"OH!" I cried out, getting off Yoongi's lap. "I have to go look at the surveillance tapes again!" With a quick kiss, I bounced out of the room, and ran to the living room where I watched the footage again. Suddenly it all made sense, and I was texting Jungkook before I could even say surveillance.

"Jeon Jungkook."

"Hey, I figured out what you meant." I told him as I walked through the house.

"Oh. That was faster than I anticipated." Jungkook admitted. I felt a little insulted, but shrugged it off as a typical Jungkook thing to say.

"Yeah. I just watched the footage, like fifteen minutes ago, for the second time. So I just need to get a shower, get dressed and eat." I told him, walking up the huge staircase.

"So I'll meet you there in about an hour and a half?" Jungkook asked. I nodded in agreement before realizing he couldn't see me and that I had to verbalize my thoughts.

"Yeah. Meet you at the scene." With that I hung up before trotting into our bedroom. Yoongi paid me no mind as he continued his conversation in some other Asian language I didn’t know. I got into my closet and pulled out a pair of black slacks, a form fitting red top, and a black blazer.

After showering, I dressed, added some light make-up before walking out of the bathroom. I picked a pair of black and red heels, slipping them on before turning to look at the silent Yoongi. He looked highly interested, as his eyes raked over my form appreciatively. I could feel the heat from his stare sinking into my bones.

"You look amazing." Yoongi said, before getting to his feet, and grabbing my hips in his hands.

"Thanks." I grinned at him cheekily. He just gave me his look. "A little different from what I'm used to, but this business look, I think it's working well for me."

"What time do you have to meet Jungkook?" Yoongi asked, giving a soft groan at my words. I smiled wickedly.

"One-thirty. Which is in like forty-five minutes." I replied. "So I have to grab a quick bite to eat, then quickly catch a cab and pray for no traffic."

"Well you have fun." He gave me a quick kiss before releasing me. "I'm going to the office, so I'll be home late, once I finish the meeting I have with the leader of the UN. Be safe, and please do try to be careful."

I nodded before running off in order to raid the kitchen for a quick meal. It ended up being an apple, a couple packages of single serve trail mix, and a bottle of grape juice. I ate on my way to the crime scene, before stuffing the snacks into my purse.

When the taxi reached the scene, I looked out of the window to see Jungkook pacing in his large, black overcoat. Shaking my head I got out of the taxi and gave the man a twenty note. Then I turned and walked to Jungkook. He gave me a look, before turning on his heel to join Taehyung.

"Right on time." Jungkook announced before striding towards the back of the building. Taehyung rolled his eyes at me, before following Jungkook.

"Jungkook found the trail," Taehyung said, once I had caught up to his pace. Looking around I saw the bloody handprint on the bricks.

"Where does it go?" Jungkook demanded, looking around frustrated as we came to a standstill. "It can't just disappear!"

"I dunno Jungkook." I sighed, a little frustrated myself. He looked agitated as Taehyung suggested that we go to Baker Street to think things through. In the end though we all went to Baker Street and pooled out notes, to come up with nothing.

Two days later, I was roused from sleep by my cell phone. Yoongi groaned in annoyance as I flipped the lamp on. He had just gotten to sleep an hour ago after taking a call from the French Prime Minister. I just sighed as I answered Jungkook's phone call. He had quickly learned that he needed to call me at night instead of texting me, as I was less apt to answer a message. I ended the quick call and rolled out of bed, fumbling to find a pair of clothes in the still dark room.

"Where are you going?" Yoongi grumbled, from his side of the bed.

"There's been another murder. Identical to the other one. I'm needed." I shimmied into my jeans, pulling a soft black undershirt of Yoongi's on.

"Be safe my dear," Yoongi finally said, sitting upright.

"I will. And you, go back to sleep." I scolded as Yoongi hadn't been sleeping a lot. He acquiesced, with a nod, before turning over in bed. I quietly slipped out of our house, making the trek to another house, in Gangnam.

London was strangely dead sounding this early in the morning. Not a lot of traffic. I found myself just breathing in the cool February air as I walked the distance to Gangnam. Maybe I could find a cab somewhere, but I knew that none would be on our street just yet. Yoongi would have had the chauffeur out, but he had come home with Yoongi a few hours earlier. I just didn't want to disturb the poor man.

Sixteen hours later, Taehyung brought me another coffee. It was the only thing keeping me awake. Jungkook was pacing after discarding the case files on the desk.

"I can't figure it out!" Jungkook bit out, a little agitated. I rolled my eyes as I retrieved the cell phone Jungkook had given me, out of my pocket. Yoongi had texted me five times in eight hours. A record for He-Who-Does-Not-Like-To-Text.

~How's things going? – YG

~Don't let Jungkook annoy you. – YG

~Please be careful. You always seem to end up injured. – YG

~Is everything all right? I haven't heard from you in a few hours. – YG

~Call me. I knew the man who murdered his wife. – YG

My eyebrows furrowed as I read and reread his last text several times. My hand shot forward and snatched the files on the desk. The first suspect, Mr. Kim Kibum. Occupied a small position in the government as an assistant to a high ranking official. Name undisclosed. The most recent suspect, Mr. Lee Sungyeol, occupied a position in government, rank considered classified.

All of a sudden everything click as I threw the files down, capturing the interest of Taehyung and Jungkook. I pulled my jacket on and fetched one of the bags of weapons I had. One was here in Jungkook's flat, another was in the house, another was hidden in the Diogene's Club, and the final bag was located in Yoongi's office. They got up, but I shook my head.

"No. Stay here." I told them, leaving. "Look for me if I'm not back in two hours." With that I left the flat, and went back to the first scene of the crime. Walking around to the back of the building, I found what I was looking for. Catching another cab to Gangnam, I walked to the back of the sandstone building and found the thing that connected both of these cases.

Picking up the sewer grate, which took a lot of my strength, I dropped down into the sewer system. Clicking on my flashlight, I started moving down the tunnel. I found a pile of goo, which was the creatures shed skin. I dry-heaved, but reminded myself that I had to do this job. I mean really who else was going to? Plus, Yoongi's life may be on the line.

I passed another pile, and then another. Sending off a quick text, I looked behind me to find a man. I was convinced that I was closer to the thing's nest, and seeing it made me recoil. I couldn't quite get my gun aimed in time, shooting only to lose the creature. I flashed the light all around me, only to have a pipe hit me in the head from behind. I hit the slimy and filthy floor like a load of bricks.

"Ah, good you're awake." My vision was blurry as I finally woke. I blinked rapidly to clear it, and finally I was able to focus on what was in front of me. A mirror image of myself. "Poor Helia Winchester. Mummy died when all three of us were little. Daddy was always hardest on us. He didn't tolerate anything less than perfection from you. Some nights he would strike you in anger, but you never complained. You never hated him for it. Never ratted him out to Uncle Bobby or Dean did you? Never wanted to make him less than proud of you."

"What the-" My mind was blown. This thing downloaded all of my memories like Sam said that it had done in St. Louis. I had spent much of the time tied in the sewer with that thing, unconscious so I only had what Sam said to go on.

"No you are friends with Jeon Jungkook and Dr. Kim Taehyung. To top it off, you are being cared for by the Korean Government. Dean came back from the dead and Sam is to become Lucifer."

"How do you know that?" I asked, stunned by it's intimate knowledge of my life.

"Because I am you." The other me grinned. "Now you are going to sit there, until I finish my plans."

"What plans?" I asked, trying desperately to loosen the knots on my wrists.

"My plans to take over the government. Your boyfriend, Min Yoongi, is the piece of the puzzle. So influential. And you will stay by my side," It/me said. I glared at the creature.

"And I will-"

"Will what?" It/me sneered. "Tell people I'm not Yoongi? Who would believe you? They would cart you off to a mental institution. That being said, be a good girl and stay here until I have a need for you."

With that statement it/me left the concrete prison in which I was tied. I struggled violently, feeling the skin begin to tear from my efforts. The knots weren't loosening at all, but I refused to cry.

"Helia?" A voice called out. A familiar voice. My head perked up. Dr. Kim Taehyung to the rescue. With Jeon Jungkook probably.

"Taehyung?" I called out, allowing my body to sag appreciatively against the pole I was tied against.

"Hey." Taehyung suddenly appeared in my vantage point. He knelt down in front of me, running his eyes over my frame, checking for injuries. "You alright?"

"Yeah. Just get me out of here." I pleaded. All of a sudden I felt my ropes being cut. Jungkook ran a hand over my exposed wrists before inhaling.

"Taehyung you need to check her hands." Jungkook said from behind me. Taehyung frowned and went to grab for my hands, but I pulled back from him.

"No!" I cried out, pushing myself to my feet.

"Helia!" Taehyung admonished, reaching out to grab ahold of me.

"No Taehyung!" I protested, dancing out of his grasp. "He's going after Yoongi next!"

"Are you sure?" Jungkook asked, a note of concern filtering into his voice. I nodded as he moved towards the exit.

"He told me so." I cried out. "Taehyung if you really must examine me, please do it in the taxi."

That's exactly what Taehyung did once we got to the cab. He pulled my wrists in front of his face and snapped on one of the back lights. He began to look over the raw, bloody strips of missing skin that were on my wrists. Luckily Taehyung kept a roll of gauze in his inner pocket, and I always had a couple medical bandages in my bag as well.

By the time we had reached the government building in which Yoongi had an office, my wrists were beautifully wrapped. Jungkook paid the cabbie. I didn't stop for a moment, concerned about Yoongi. I hefted my heavy bag over my shoulder, before quietly opening the door to the government building.

It was open, which wasn't exactly surprising. These government officials came into their offices at all hours. They kept odd hours as well. Yoongi, for example, was usually gone before I awoke at 6:30 A.M. and never in bed before 1 A.M.

"Where's his office?" Taehyung asked me, quietly.

"Follow me." I whispered, before leading the way to his office. We all had to zigzag through the halls which seemed to be mazelike. Finally I reached the door of Yoongi's office and put my hands out, in an effort to stop the two determined men.

"Helia!" Taehyung hissed, quietly. I just put a finger to my mouth in a plea for silence. Jungkook nudged Taehyung's arm, before pointing out the cracked door.

Silently I reached into my bag, pulling out a Browning, a Colt, and a Glock, all three loaded with silver bullets, as well as three silver knives. I gave the Browning to Taehyung and a knife, then handed Jungkook the Glock and a knife, and kept the Colt and a knife. Dean and I had always felt more comfortable with Colts, but Sammy had a chromed Beretta.

Motioning to the two men, I tiptoed to the door, indicating for the other two to be silent. I even slowed and quieted my breathing as I leaned against the door jamb. The gun was held in front of me as I patiently waited.

"You won't be able to get away with this." Yoongi's voice wafted out into the hallway, telling me/it.

"Oh, but I will." Me/it said. I peered into the room, through the crack in the door. It/me was facing Yoongi on the chair. "You see, I want to change things for my people. And you are my way to do that."

With a snarl I threw open the door and rushed into the room. Surprising Taehyung and Jungkook stayed behind heeding my silent instructions. I, however, was fueled by my emotions and didn't think as I held the gun on the creature.

"Oh, look," It/me greeted me, rising from the chair gracefully. "Helia."

"Leave him alone." I said, keeping the gun trained on the shape-shifter.

"Oh, I can't do that." It/me practically purred. "You see, Yoongi here, is the key to my plans."

"Helia," Yoongi said softly, from his place behind his desk. I ignored his plea and kept my full attention on the creature I was hunting.

"So you want to use Yoongi's position in order to help you." I stated blandly, not at all surprised by his plans.

"Of course. With Yoongi's power I can do anything I want." The shifter smirked. "I can finally change the laws and let my fellow shifters become a part of society for a change."

"That's not going to happen." I snapped, shifting my weight subtly onto my right leg.

"Oh, I think it will. You see, if I become Yoongi I can have you discredited and removed if you try to say anything." It/me said, before it shed its skin, leaving an oozing pile of goo on the floor. "Kill me now."

The shifter changed its skin to mimic that of Yoongi. I had to swallow as I realized what I being forced to do. My hands started to sweat and tremble from this unexpected event.

I remembered how I had frozen when Sam and I came across both Dean's in St. Louis. I couldn't pull the trigger then, and to be honest, I wasn't entirely sure if I could pull the trigger now.

"Ah Taehyung, Jungkook, so nice of you both to join us." I turned to look at the two men in surprise. That hadn't been a part of the plan.

Taehyung fired a shot at the creature, which ducked, and it went crazy. The creature hit Jungkook, throwing him into the opposite wall, where he lay unmoving. Then it turned to Taehyung and threw him into the desk, where his head collided with the edge of the desk. He went still.

Yoongi had started to struggle against his bonds as the creature tossed Jungkook and then Taehyung around his office. The creature turned to me. I felt paralyzed with fear as it moved towards me. It/Yoongi grabbed a hold of my hair and chucked me into the wall where a lone bookcase stood. I slammed into it headfirst, feeling the disassociation of a head injury, but still managing to keep a grip on my gun.

"Now my little Helia, I don't want to have to torture you." It/Yoongi gently ran his hand over my cheek down to my neck.

"Leave her alone!" Yoongi roared from his seat, shifting the creature's attention from me to him.

"I don't think so." It/Yoongi practically purred. "You see once you are gone, it will only be us two. And I can do whatever I want to Helia."

"You are wrong." I said feeling dizzy but pointing the gun at It/Yoongi.

"Are you going to shoot me Helia? Remember how you froze when you had to shoot one of my brother's who looked like Dean?"

"Yeah, but not this time." Without thinking of it, I pulled the trigger. It/Yoongi fell to the floor, not going to impersonate anyone else after this.

"Helia." Yoongi breathed out in relief. I stumbled to the desk and used the silver knife to cut his bonds. "Are you alright?" Yoongi caught my chin in his hand, running a finger over the tender area on the left side of my head. I winced. "Sorry, love." Yoongi brushed his lips over that piece of my skull.

"Jjjun-ungkoook." I mumbled beginning to slur my words. "Taehyung."

"Shh." Yoongi shushed me, gently pushing me into his plush leather chair. "I'll go check on Taehyung and Jungkook." I hummed in response and sank back in his chair. Yoongi gently uncurled my fingers from the gun, locking it into a desk drawer before going over to the rousing men on the floor of his office.

An ambulance was called and the three of us were rushed to hospital. Jungkook and Taehyung were discharged after getting examinations, but I was kept overnight for observation with my concussion. My wrists were properly cleaned and bandaged and the doctor determined the wound on my head didn't need staples or stitches.

The next morning, Yoongi and I were waiting for the discharge papers. Yoongi had continuously asked me how I felt for almost an hour until I couldn't take it anymore. I snapped at him. For the past forty odd minutes he had been quiet, though he kept throwing me concerned looks. In order to fight the awkwardness, I flipped on the television, flipping past stations. The majority of it was junk, all stupid shows, but I finally settled on a news channel. I figured both Yoongi and I would like that, Mr. Korean Government and all, but he would probably tell me he already knew what was on the news.

"Lee Eunhee reporting for the KBS news. We have just gotten an update on the story we have been following all night. It appears there is still no trace of the mysterious man who assaulted a high-ranking government official last night in his office. The police are baffled by this case, although there were three other witnesses. Apparently the man's brother, a friend, and his fiancée were all involved." With a click I shut off the television, trying to digest what I had just heard.

"If that was a Min Yoongi way of a proposal, you'll have to try again." I told Yoongi, not looking at him. Yoongi didn't have a chance to answer before the doctor came in and gave me my instructions for discharge.

 

Chapter Text

A/N: Thank you everyone for enjoying these one-shots. I'm glad that they are relate-able. I write them due to my own emotions and how I feel at the time. Please enjoy.

 

Warning! Possibly triggering. Eating disorders and Self-harm

 

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I always wondered how I, of all people, ended up with such a beautiful, caring, and happy man such as Jung Hoseok. By all rights and all human laws Hoseok should have been disgusted, not giving me the time of day. But he didn’t I mused, a ghost of a smile on my lips as I entered our shared apartment.

Hosoek and I had created this sanctuary together – spent hours trying to compromise on decorating the studio apartment. At first I told Hoseok that I couldn’t care less about how the studio was decorated, but he persisted. Hoseok threated if I didn’t choose something, we would live in an empty apartment. I scowled, but after helped Hoseok in decorating.

That was one of the ways Hoseok helped. By forcing me to things I would be complacent about. But he never persisted if it became a larger problem or pushed me too far out of my comfort zone. On the opposite hand, he would lend a helping hand, reassuring me no matter what.

I had several issues. One being the fear of making decisions. Not because I didn’t want to be an adult, I was scared of the consequences of making a wrong decision, which would in turn affect Hoseok in a negative manner. Like with decorating, every time I suggested something I wondered if Hoseok would hate it, by extension hate me as well for making the suggestion. He never wavered, helping me when I felt like it was too much and had anxiety attacks over this.

Another issue was my need to be perfect. For years I had held onto the belief that this was the only way I could be loved. This stemmed in many ways. From self harming, eating disorders, and low self-esteem. Hoseok was patient and reassured me everyday that I was beautiful, perfect, and most important able to be loved. He even made appointments with a counselor since he couldn’t be with me all the time, which I went to at least twice a week.

However, I did learn of an underlying cause – Bipolar Disorder. There are multiple types of this illness and mine wasn’t severe, however, I id have noticeable mood swings. Certain statements shifted my moods either for the better or worse. Hoseok was always patient and understanding; he took the time to catalogue what made me tick, what made me shift my mood, and also body language.

Hoseok was an angel, never demanding and always there for me. He knew my anxieties with meeting the people most important in his life, so he never pushed. He would talk about them all the time. We would sit on our couch, a cup of coffee or tea held between our hands as we talked about anything and everything. Those days were rare though, as Hoseok was a busy man, an idol, and had to go on tours and to practice.

Hosoek had been hesitant about leaving me alone, but I assured him I would be fine. Although my brain prickled with the sense of abandonment again, I tried not to act upon my destructive coping methods. I saw the counselor and distracted myself with independent studies and work. If it got too much, I could call the psychologist for a crisis intervention which happened twice when I succumbed to the monsters in my head.

But Hoseok came back, he always came back. He made sure to assure me that he didn’t care if I relapsed. I was beautiful and perfect. Hoseok murmured these words as he kissed every mark, new or old on my body. He worshipped me, put me back together piece by piece. Which led us to the present day. I still hadn’t met the other members of his group as I was uneasy.

What if they hated me? What if they thought I was too much trouble and work? They were more Hoseok’s family than his mother and father. Even though Hoseok reassured me they would love me, how could they not, I stil had that lingering fear. Hoseok was kind enough to abide by my irrational fears and never forced me to meet them.

Now I shrugged off my coat and made sure it was put away inside the closet before making sure my shoes were in a line right inside the door. I passed by the room, and turned on the heat, which informed me that Hoseok was not yet home. I dressed in my pink nightgown, with my silk robe overtop. It was much too cold to wander about with bare legs so I slipped on a pair of thigh highs adorned with ruffles and a black bow. https://www.polyvore.com/hope/set?id=227223579

 

I then padded into the kitchen where I made a bowl of ramen for dinner. Once I ate about half of the noodles and sauce, I returned to our bedroom and started the homework and assigned readings for my Master’s class.

“Jagi! I’m home!” Hoseok’s voice rang through the house after an hour of studying. I smiled and rushed to greet him. But I stopped dead, once I noticed he wasn’t alone.

“Hello!” The man who spoke had a boxy grin and a deep voice. I whimpered and grabbed a hold of Hoseok who let out a soft sigh.

“I’m sorry Jagi, but they were curious,” Hoseok rubbed my back in a soothing manner. “None of them will hurt you.”

“Of course we won’t!” One of them spoke up, sounding offended and I shrank back trying to hide.

“Jin-hyung, please,” Hoseok sighed. “Come on, love. You can’t be terrified of people. Let me say if my friends can accept Yoongi-hyung, they’ll accept you as well.”

“Yah!” Yoongi exclaimed and I giggled, missing this interaction with other humans who weren’t Hoseok.

“Promise,” I looked up at Hoseok with large eyes full of hope, which Hoseok was happy to see after so much agony.

“Promise,” Hobi kissed the top of my head. “guys, please, make yourselves comfortable. We’ll be in. Just give us a moment.”

“You should have warned me,” I whined, face hidden in his chest.

“I couldn’t,” Hoseok replied, hand stroking my hair as his group members shuffled past. “You would have run far away.”

“Oh God, Hobi, look at what I’m wearing!” I backed away, heat in my face.

“You look hot,” Hoseok agreed, stealing a kiss.

“Hoseok!” I complained, but he shook his head.

“They don’t care. Now come on.”

Hoseok wrapped his large warm hand around mine as we made our way into the living room. Four of his members lounged on our leather couch, while one sat on the recliner and the sixth looked at the books on our wall to floor bookshelf. One of them – he had gray hair, met my eyes. I wanted to run, to tell Hoseok to let me go as I looked at him. He seemed cold, stoic, as he gazed at us, his face betraying none of his thoughts.

“Can I borrow some of these?” A tall man with silver hair asked.

“You’ll have to ask Gemma,” Hoseok replied, easy in conversation with them. “They are all hers.”

“Really?” He seemed surprised. “You have good taste in reading,” the man complimented. “I’m Namjoon, but my stage name is Rap Monster.”

“Hi,” my voice was a mere whisper. “I’m Gemma.”

I scratched at my arms, already feeling the anxiety of being judged as an awkward silence filled the room. I wondered why no one said anything – I must disgust them from sight alone. Was it due to the weight I had gained? My unattractive features? Was I not good enough to even known them? My scratching was becoming more frantic and Hoseok stopped my hands.

“Jagi stop!” He said in a firm voice and with his free hand turned my head to face him.

“They don’t – they don’t like me,” I panted, not in a good head space at the moment.

“Look at me,” Hoseok said, keeping calm, but offering a smile. “Did they say that?”

“No,” I shook my head.

“Then how do you know my friends dislike you?”

“No one likes me Hobi,” I whimpered and his eyes turned sad. It made me hate myself even more, for I was such a burden.

“I like you and I know my friends will like you. Just give them a chance, okay?” Hoseok soothed.

“Namjoon-ah was nice to you,” Hobi grinned at me as I nodded. “See. Nothing to worry about.”

“Yeah,” I agreed and calmed down after a few moments with Hoseok’s assistance.

“You’ve met Namjoon-ah. This is Jin-hyung,” Hoseok pointed to a guy sitting on the couch. He had blonde hair and a nice smile.

“Hello. Gemma right?” Jin spoke in a soothing tone, like a mother. I felt myself relax a little more, as he just exuded a presence that was gentle.

“Yes,” I shifted a little and ducked my head, hair falling forward. I was embarrassed that they witnessed that.

“Hoseok talks about you all the time. I almost feel like I knew you months ago,” I relaxed with his words though I was still tense. What if Hoseok complained about me all the time and they knew it?

“Jimin!” A cute guy with puffier cheeks smiled at me.

“You can also call him Chim Chim,” Hoseok teased his dongsaeng.

“Please, noona, don’t!” Jimin begged, doing aegyo. I let out a soft puff of laughter.

“I won’t,” I breathed and he looked satisfied.

“Hey Noona!” A guy with reddish hair, the one from the hallway waved. “I’m Taehyung, but call me Tae or even TaeTae.” I gave a shy wave in response.

“Jungkook,” the one sitting on the arm of the couch mumbled, his expression cold. He didn’t like me, I could tell. I just inclined my head.

“Min Yoongi,” the cold man stated, eyes calculating but at the same time warm.

Those two intimidated me the most. Their auras were in reality threatening and it didn’t seem like they enjoyed my company. But four others did, at least it seemed that way, which is more than I could have wished for. I assumed that once I met them, I would have been packing my bags and left on my own in a strange city.

“Is that your real hair color?” Jimin’s cheerful voice broke me out of my musings. I focused back on him.

“Huh?” I was surprised they would even talk to me. I was ready to slip away to my bedroom and continue reading. “Oh, yes.”

“It almost matches my own hair,” Taehyung came out of nowhere, which startled me.

“Everything alright?” Hoseok looked up from where he had move to stand beside Yoongi with Namjoon joining them.

“Yeah,” I said a bit uncertain but didn’t want to ruin his conversation. Hoseok had already given up enough for stupid and useless me. I couldn’t afford for him to give up anything more. I dug my fingernails into my hand, forcing the tears back. I wasn’t going to show weakness in front of them. They probably already thought that I was a basket case. I waited until everyone was distracted when I took the chance and slipped out of the room.

I crept into the bathroom, locked the door before the ugly sobs ripped out of my body. Oh God, why couldn’t I be normal? I would do anything to live a normal life again, not be scared of the unknown. I held onto the sink, avoiding looking at my reflection in the mirror which only further served to prove my point. Hoseok and his friends were so beautiful, and I looked like a mushroom compared to them.

I wanted to scream, to grab hold of the mirror and bathe in the shards. I wanted to die something fierce in that moment, so when I caught sight of Hoseok’s razor, it was only reaction to break it and remove the blades. I hiccupped as I pulled my silk robe sleeve up towards my elbow. This bared my scarred forearm to the cool air. I had so many scars that the skin was raised and therer was no room for anything else. I smiled as the razor sliced through the skin and leftover scars. It had been too long since I felt this euphoric. I lost track of time, lost track of how many times I sliced into my skin.

Once I stopped, I gasped. There were too many cuts and blood was dripping everywhere. I dropped the razor and rushed to staunch the bleeding. I cleaned up the bathroom and wrapped my arm. It had been too long since I last lost control. Then I thought of what Hoseok would say, how disappointed he would be. I just had to keep it quiet until my arm healed. But then again, Hoseok had a busy schedule coming up so he wouldn’t notice. Probably.

I exited the bathroom and rejoined the others in the living room. Hoseok looked worried when he saw my face – no doubt swollen from crying, but I gave him a quick smile. He seemed to relax as he saw my smile. I sat down at an isolated chair and grabbed a few books Namjoon had looked at. I put a post it note inside asking him to inform me of his favorite parts once he was finished – if he had time to do so.

“Hey!” Seokjin crept towards me, making sure I was able to see his approach. “What do you like to do?”

“Um, read,” I said unsure. I didn’t know if that was the right answer or not, even though it was supposed to be my own hobby.

“What do you like to read?” Jin was talking as though I was a scared child, but I didn’t mind. My eyes grew wide as I thought of what to say.

“Anything other than romance and comics,” I blinked at him. He hummed thoughtful.

“Any recommendations?”

“What do you like to read?” I asked, hoping he wouldn’t hate something that I had to offer. Then I thought perhaps I would be too forward and pushy with Namjoon, so I just shifted the books off to the side. He had a busy schedule anyway.

“I’m usually busy as I haven’t had time to enjoy a good book. But I liked action books,” Jin said. I nodded and thought he might fare better with Young Adult as they were a little shorter and easier to read.

“Young Adult might be easier?” I kind of squeaked out. “Not saying you can’t read, but with your busy schedule - ”

“It’s okay,” Jin interrupted and I breathed out easier. “I’m not offended. I’m actually touched that you took into consideration our busy lives. So what are your suggestions?”

I rose from my seat and looked at the hundreds of books littering the bookshelves. I decided on three and pulled them, with care, from their places and took them over to Jin who showed great interest in the books. He chose one, but asked me to set aside the others for later. I gave him the other two instead, and he promised to treat them with the utmost respect.

 

Across the room, Yoongi observed his dongsaeng who was nervous as soon as he noticed the absence of Gemma. Yoongi wasn’t stupid – far from it in fact. He might not have his IQ published like Namjoon’s, but his was close in number

. He also may come off as cold and detached, but he analyzed and observed the situation.

“What’s up with her?” Yoongi interrupted Namjoon who looked upset for a moment, before he too looked to Hoseok for answers.

“What do you mean?” Hoseok was nervous.

“What is the issue with her? People don’t have panic attacks just when meeting others.”

“Um,” Hoseok fidgeted. “She’s had it rough. Gemma has low self-esteem. Her life has been difficult. I’m really hoping you guys can help break her out of her shell.”

“We’ll certainly help Hoseok,” Namjoon stated. He relaxed a little while they continued their conversation. Yoongi noticed when she slunk into the room, keeping unwanted attention off of her. She sat down away from them. Yoongi made to get up, but Jin beat him to it. The three watched as Jin seemed to reassure the startled and jumpy girl. Yoongi caught sight of Jungkook’s scowl and glare, which he filed away as well. For now, it seemed to be harmless, however he would have to keep an eye on their maknae just in case.

 

One Week Later

https://www.polyvore.com/school_time/set?id=224106615

I arrived home, exhausted from a long day at work and a lengthy lecture. I wasn’t expecting to see either Hoseok or Jimin at the house. They were working on their comeback so Hoseok was always running around. He would arrive home at like 1 or 2 in the morning and be gone by 6. This was both a blessing and a curse as it meant he didn’t notice my arms, but I felt so alone.

“Hey, jagi!” Hoseok greeted me as I walked into the kitchen. I greeted him with a shy hello and a nod towards Jimin, not the usual hug and kiss.

“I just came in to grab a cup of tea. Sorry to bother,” my voice wouldn’t have been audible if any noise occurred in the cramped kitchen.

“Stay!” Jimin grinned, holding his excitement back. “You weren’t bothering us.”

“I told you jagi, you are never a bother,” Hoseok said, eyes sad.

“Yeah, Hoseok’s boring,” Jimin stuck his tongue out at his hyung who feigned hurt at his dongsaeng’s words.

“I never thought so,” I disagreed, but then tensed as though waiting for some repercussion.

“Hah!” Hoseok was a bit loud and sudden with his crowing, but he was happy for two reasons. One, I was starting to open up, and two, I was defending him.

It was at this moment that I realized how much I meant to Hoseok, how much he had given up for me. I also started to realize that most of what I believed about myself was wrong, and Hoseok was speaking the truth.

It was hard to socialize with his friends, especially since Jungkook seemed to dislike me all the time, but as time passed I fell into easy patterns with them. Jin and Namjoon discussed literature with me, Tae and Jimin were warm – often times chatting about things I didn’t know or understand, Yoongi would talk about music – cadences and have me listen to his unfinished work, but Jungkook was slower to warm. We finally bonded over his love for Piano Tiles when he caught sight of me trying to play, and failing miserably.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Text

Yoongi: https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/animal-jam-clans-1/images/0/0c/Db6f0cf9f7d3575ffde8534fd2fa6167--brown-wolf-black-wolf.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20170628162241

Y/N: https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/fallout/images/b/bb/White_wolf.png/revision/latest?cb=20130714041758

Hobi: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/content/dam/animals/thumbs/rights-exempt/mammals/g/gray-wolf_thumb.JPG

Namjoon:

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/animal-jam-clans-1/images/d/d2/Gray-Wolf-9.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20160524152532

Jimin: https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/animal-jam-clans-1/images/d/d9/Red_timber_wolf.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20170109222154

Jin: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/ea/f1/dc/eaf1dcc08751150331bb11ad5db41782.jpg

Taehyung: http://www.l-ateliergourmand.com/images/www.alaskabearsandwolves.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/wolf.jpg

Jungkook: https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_j4NKuHgFDE/V0nqQeQ9UII/AAAAAAABBZk/ROT1usqKXRwqdVV-MhiwcEUbavSPyJtQQCLcB/s1600/ScreenShot6861.jpg

My café was a hit in the Gangnam area. I had a nice selection of flavors, pastries, and a small lending library in the corner. The library wasn’t one in which an individual needed a card or had a deadline in which to return, it was simply leave a book when you take one.

Some patrons would donate a large sum of books to the café without taking any. It was interesting to see the hodgepodge of books that accumulated over the months. Foreign books in every language, travel, romance, horror, manga, coffee table books -  you name it I had it.

It was in the middle of May when I noticed a peculiar patron who would wander inside around 3 pm and stay until around 7 pm. He was tall, thin, and had an innocent face. The boy couldn’t have been more than seventeen years old at the maximum. I felt a pull to him, a pull I hadn’t felt in years since Taehyung joined the pack.

This particular kid would wander in and ask for a cup of hot water. I would drop a lemon slice into it for free before sliding the cup towards him. He would take it, grateful, before scurrying over to the bookcase and taking out a book. I found him curled into the same spot day after day. When it was time for him to go home, he would press a piece of paper into the book and slide it back onto the shelf.

One day I was ready for the boy. I had a cup of hot lemon water which I handed to him once he came to the counter. I smiled at him, but he was nervous. I couldn’t smell anything on him, which was odd and alarming, but the kid didn’t pose any kind of threat.

At 7 pm when he made to leave, going to put the book back I called out to him. He startled, which made my mind prickle with unease, as he turned to look at me, wide eyed.

“You can take the book with you,” I said to him, a faint smile tugging at the corner of my lips as I wiped the counter.

“No, ajumma, I couldn’t,” he protested.

“I insist. You have been so reverent, and no one has taken an interest in Ursula Le Guin’s short stories for ages. I am glad you have,” I said to him, handing over a small take away cup filled with hot chocolate. “Enjoy the book. Come back when you’ve finished and tell me about it.”

“Thank you,” he bowed, before rushing out of the door. I chuckled and began the nightly tasks of cleaning up, when the bell dinged to inform me of another customer.

“Hobi!” I exclaimed when I turned around to meet the eyes of one Jung Hoseok. He chuckled and wrapped me in his embrace, kissing my lips, while the air swirled with his scent. Hobi smelled like Christmas, like home – pine and spices.

“I’ve come to walk this pretty woman home,” he said, releasing me from his grip. I smiled as I finished the remaining chores before we locked the doors.

“Thanks, Hobi,” our hands were entwined, swinging in the darkening night. It wasn’t dangerous to walk home, but they worried.

“Hyungs, Tae, Jimin, we’re home!” Hobi called out as he unlocked the door. I had time to take off my shoes before being ambushed by the maknae.

“Noona, I’m so glad your home!” Taehyung said, bending his head down to sniff at my scent gland. He scented me before kissing my lips and then pulling me into the kitchen.

“Jin-hyung made dinner!” Jimin said, taking me into his arms. I was sat onto his lap while Taehyung went to bother the professional chef.

“I made your favorites,” Jin promised me, curling a hand around my neck in an affectionate manner before demanding that Namjoon be kept out of the kitchen.

Namjoon started whining that he only wanted to greet me properly. Then I heard the sound of skin hitting skin and a whine that only the clumsy alpha could emit. Those of us in the kitchen snickered and shook our heads while we listened to Namjoon whine to the pack alpha about how unfair it was.

Finally, dinner was ready and the table was set. Jin started to call out for everyone to assemble and the other two members of our pack slunk into the room. Yoongi sat down beside me, making sure to scent and check for injuries.

It was an instinct thing. When I came home, or when Yoongi came home he would check to make sure that I wasn’t injured. Then came the scenting. Most of the time I was fine with it, but sometimes when I was irritated it irked me the lack of control we had over our animal side.

“This is so good,” Hobi exclaimed, making the beta smile at the smiley alpha.

“Tae, can you get the chocolate sauce from the fridge?” I asked the only other beta in our pack. He raised an eyebrow but nodded, going to retrieve the item.

“Something wrong?” Jin asked, blinking in shock at the strange item that I wanted. I shook my head, taking the bottle and then squirting the chocolate goodness all over the plate of kimchi.

“Y/N,” Jimin started to protest, but Yoongi sent him a look. The alpha maknae shut up, content with his own dinner.

“This is so good,” I hummed around the mouthful of chocolate kimchi. Jin just nodded, not understanding the appeal. “Want some?”

“No, love,” Yoongi said with a gentle smile. “I’m fine, thanks for the offer.”

I was nuzzled in the side of my head by the seemingly cold alpha. I purred in content before shoveling another pile of the kimchi in my mouth. I made a mental note to eat that more often.

After dinner we all gathered into the living room to watch the latest episode of the current drama playing for the night. I was cuddled into Namjoon’s side, Hobi’s hand resting on my stomach.

“How was your day sweetheart? You never said,” Jin asked during a commercial break.

“Good!” I smiled, sitting up a little. “I had one of my regulars today. He’s so cute, yet I’m worried.”

“Why is that?” Yoongi asked after seeing the frown on my face.

“Something is off Yoongi. I cannot detect a scent, but I want to be near him, and he seems so - ” I paused searching for the word. “Not right? Um I don’t know this word in Korean.”

“What is the word in English?” Namjoon asked.

“Dejected.”

“Nagsim han,” Namjoon supplied. I nodded and tried the word out myself.

“So yeah that!” I gave up after my tongue tied and I sounded like an idiot.

“You can’t smell him?” Yoongi snarled, concerned over my welfare.

“Yoongi, babe, it’s okay,” I tried to soothe the pack alpha – he was emitting a ton of pheromones and scents into the air. My omega was reacting by cowering back. “He hasn’t done anything to be harmful or anything like that.”

“Yoongi!” Hoseok snapped, curling around me in a protective manner. He was the protector, second alpha of the pack. His job was to protect the omega and beta’s from the alpha’s if anything were to happen.

“Sorry,” Yoongi calmed down, coming closer to me as I whined. I shifted and so did Yoongi, the two of us curling around each other once I forgave the head alpha.

The rest of the pack shifted as well as we laid in the living room, grooming one another. Yoongi put his head on top of mine, his legs over mine as he groomed my ears.

https://kiza.eu/media/wolfpaper/Peyto_and_Cheza_C24S3255.jpg

We stayed in our wolf forms for a while. It was relaxing and we all needed to shift. I knew in a month or two I would shift until the end of the next three months. I would also not be able to run the café, which Taehyung and Jimin both promised to do in my absence.

“So, about this guy. I want to meet him,” Yoongi said later as I padded into the bedroom. I whined as I jumped onto the bed, licking at his hand. “Y/N.”

I shifted back into my human form. I curled up underneath the covers and looked up at my pack alpha. Jimin came into the room, curling up around my back as well.

“Okay. Tomorrow?” I asked. Yoongi nodded.

 

A week passed without the presence of the young teen. I was anxious and a wreck since I only had three weeks left before Yoongi expected me to leave the café. Yoongi would sit in the café between the hours I informed him, laptop in hand, while we waited. It was later than normal on Friday when I saw the boy. I perked up and whined before starting on his usual order.

“Hey ajumma,” the boy came into the store, hands in his pocket looking awkward. I grinned.

“Call me Noona, or Y/N,” I said to him, handing over the paper cup of hot lemon water.

“I finished the book!” He sounded excited, taking the hot water.

“Oh? And did you enjoy it?” I asked him. Yoongi came over to sit at the counter. He took a discrete sniff of the boy before giving me another look. The boy proceeded to talk about the book, his favorite was the short story The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas. That night he took another book before leaving the café.

“So?” I demanded of Yoongi as I flipped the sign to closed. He shut his laptop.

“I feel that need as well, Y/N,” he stated in his deep voice. “The only issue is the scent. Why would he cover it up?”

“You think so?” I asked, a frown gracing my face.

“Yeah it isn’t an uncommon practice in more traditional households,” Yoongi hummed, assisting in the cleaning process.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I mean that if the father or mother is conventional they might require their kid or kids to block their scent,” Yoongi sighed. “One alpha headed pack. That’s why some alpha males will kill the kids – no one to challenge them.”

“People still live like that?” I asked, frightened, and saddened at the possibility.

“Unfortunately,” Yoongi shifted, looking uncomfortable. “My father was the same.”

“Yoongi,” I gasped, shocked at this admission.

“No worries, baby,” Yoongi pulled me to him, placing a kiss on my lips. “We’ve got our own pack, now. Let’s go home, yeah?”

 

Over the course of the next two weeks one of the pack would be at the café during the times that the teen frequented. We learned his name, Jungkook, and that he was a senior at the local academy. Namjoon went digging, trying to find out more about the boy. He was a teacher at the high school in the area. We talked about books, which Taehyung and I were passionate about.

Then came the day when I woke up shifted into my wolf state. I whined and whimpered, not wanting to be confined like this since Jungkook wasn’t a part of our pack yet. I padded into the kitchen where the oldest beta was making breakfast. I nosed the back of his warm calves, which made him jump.

“Aww, honey.” Seokjin turned to reprimand me but noticed how dejected I looked, so then he started to soothe instead. “It’s only for a few months.”

I showed him my canines in a dog grimace. He chuckled before handing me a piece of bacon. I whimpered and wagged my tail, licking his hand free of all the grease left over.

“Morning Jin-hyung. Have you seen Y/N?” Namjoon came into the dining room after it was set, scratching at his neck. I poked my head out from underneath the table and yipped a greeting before laying down by Jin’s feet. “There she is. A bit early, don’t you think?”

“No. We generalized the conception date,” Jin disagreed just as Jimin, Hobi, and Taehyung came into the room. “Is Yoongi up?”

“I didn’t try,” Tae shivered, a bit dramatic. I rolled my eyes and got to my feet.

“Are you going to wake him up?” Jin asked as I nudged past him. I sniffed and pranced out of the room. I neared the nesting room where Yoongi was still somewhat asleep, where I began to lick all over his face.

“Yuck!” Yoongi pushed me away. “Tae I swear to God - ” My tail wagged as I sat down on my haunches. “Y/N?”

Woof! I let out a small bark of confirmation as I watched him stand. Yoongi was beautiful. His skin looked like porcelain, unmarred by anything but the marks of our teeth. He might be short and slight, but his demeanor was anything but. Yoongi was a force to be reckoned with, which is why he was the pack alpha. Not to mention the oldest alpha, but he had a way about him. He never lost a fight, but he didn’t provoke fights either like many alpha’s.

“Come on,” Yoongi motioned as he moved towards the door. I wagged and my tongue lolled as I raced towards him and the food. He chuckled, following behind at a more leisurely pace.

“Hey beautiful!” Jimin chuckled as I barreled into his side.

“I wish you could stay like that,” Hobi sighed, handing me a sausage. I whined and pinned my head back after I ate the sausage. I didn’t want to be stuck in my wolf’s body.

“You are beautiful,” Namjoon soothed, petting down my back. I whimpered and curled onto the floor, head on his shoes. Namjoon just grinned as they continued to eat.

“Well it looks like I will be opening the café today,” Taehyung said. I groaned, which sounded like I was dying. Jimin chuckled.

“School lets out around noon, so I will be able to assist over the afternoons,” Jimin agreed. He was a preschool teacher. Taehyung was a YouTuber, gaming and reading were his specialty, so therefore he usually did his videos and livestreams at night.

“I can pop in during the mornings to make sure Taehyung and the employees are surviving,” Jin stated, eating a bit more.

“I can go in during the afternoons as long as we don’t have meetings,” Namjoon motioned to Yoongi and himself.

“And I can help out whenever classes are slow,” Hobi offered.

“We’ll be fine,” Jimin urged his hyung. “You have that competition coming up. Y/N would want you to practice.” I barked and sat up. “See?”

“Fine!” Hobi exclaimed. “It just feels strange not to assist you guys though.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Yoongi sighed, drinking his coffee. “Plus, someone has to keep Y/N occupied as well.”

“She can come to school with me!” Jimin offered. I wagged in excitement.

“Nothing too strenuous,” Jin warned as we finished breakfast and went on our ways. “I mean it! Jimin, Y/N!”

“Jimin, Y/N,” Yoongi cautioned us to answer. I whined low in my throat, slinking down close to the ground in front of Jin. The pack could smell the scent of my apology in the air.

“I’m not mad,” Jin assured me as I turned over onto my back, stomach in the air.

“I’ll watch her Hyung. She’s going to be with two and three-year olds, not prisoners,” Jimin said with his cute little smile. Yoongi snorted but said nothing further.

 

 

Taehyung kept me updated with the Jungkook situation whenever he could. Most of my information came from Namjoon, Yoongi, and sometimes from Hobi who would come to the café in the evenings to get a cup of coffee. Apparently, Jungkook missed me. He was always asking where I was, but at the same time getting closer with my packmates.

I was happy, but now Jin had me kept to the house. I wasn’t happy about this new development. He said it was due to being more vulnerable at this point as well as going to be uncomfortable.

He wasn’t lying. I could feel the pups moving in my gut. It was hard to walk around and lay comfortably. I had to stretch out fully, lying on my side with my legs extended. I whined whenever I needed something and one of my mates would come running.

Jimin and Yoongi left large pillows on the floor so that my body would be cushioned. It helped, but I was still so uncomfortable that all I did was whine most of the time. My mates would spend as much time as possible ensuring that I was safe, comfortable, and as happy as I could be. After Hoseok’s dance competition, he had more time to spend at home, so I usually had a companion.

Jin was adamant that I was not to be left alone as the final month approached. As he stated, they generalized the conception date, therefore, the due date would definitely be sooner than what they estimated. He didn’t want me to go through labor by myself, even though it was normal for an Omega to birth the pups themselves.

My stomach was close to bursting – about two weeks to go now, when the door flung open and I saw the pack Alpha along with Taehyung supporting a semi-conscious Jungkook between them. I struggled to my feet as they brought the teen into the room and eased him onto the couch.

“Y/N, stay here,” Hoseok tried to keep me, but I fought against his hold. I snapped and snarled, trying to get closer to the boy, who had a faint Alpha scent wafting into the room. He smelled like cinnamon and smoke.

“Y/N!” Yoongi snapped, and I immediately reacted. I went lax in Hoseok’s hold and whined, showing my neck to the head alpha. He just snorted and ignored my attempts at an apology.

“Hyung?” Jungkook’s voice broke through the silence, while I lay head still tipped, listless on my cushions. Yoongi still hadn’t forgiven me, and it was evident that he had forgotten with everything going on.

This was the bad thing for wolves. If we weren’t forgiven, the guilt and instincts bound us until we were.

“Jungkook-ah,” Yoongi greeted the boy, running a hand through his chocolate brown locks. “How are you feeling?”

“It hurts,” the boy whimpered and Jin looked up from where he was binding a bandage around his leg.

“Where, Jungkook-ssi?” Jin asked.

“Everywhere,” he moaned, tears in his eyes.

“It’ll be okay,” Yoongi soothed. “Was it your pack alpha?”

“Yes,” Jungkook stated. “My scent blockers wore off, they’ve never done that before.”

“I’m sorry,” Jin stated, sympathy etched deep into his face. He came from a good pack, like Namjoon and Taehyung. The rest were all running from their packs, which is how we all met. Luckily our wolves recognized each other as mates, and we formed a pack. It took a while before we had enough money to settle into this apartment, but the ones who came from good packs had their parent’s support.

“Noona!” Jungkook took one look at me, before his face twisted. “What’s wrong, noona?”

“Y/N?” Yoongi twisted in his seat, while I whined and curled my tail closer between my legs. “Sorry, baby. You’re forgiven.”

Yoongi shifted into his wolf form before nuzzling my neck and licking all over my face in a form of an apology. My tail thumped as I leaned into the touch. He huffed, puffing air over the side of my face before curling around me alongside Hoseok.

“It’s fine, Jungkook-ssi,” Jin patted the younger on his shoulder while he watched the display. “Y/N is closer to her due date.”

“That’s why I haven’t seen Noona in a while?” Jungkook asked and Jin nodded. “Poor noona!” Jungkook shuffled off the couch and came closer to me. Yoongi let out a small growl, since he wasn’t part of the pack yet, but allowed him to reach out a hand and stroke my ears.

I’m not sure if Yoongi saw him as a pup more than an Alpha or since Jin and his own scents were covering up more of the Alpha scent. I licked at his hand, which caused Jungkook to giggle a bit. There was a meeting and Jungkook was allowed to stay, on the condition that he join our pack. Jungkook agreed, having met most of the pack and feeling the pull. Yoongi bit him right away, sealing his fate.

It was a week and a half later. Most of the pack were gone, except for Jungkook. This was rare as the Alpha’s and Beta’s had taken to staying at home since the due date was so close. But I guess there was something unavoidable so they had to leave Jungkook in charge.

I was sitting in the nest, well lying if you want to be technical. Jungkook had just left the room in order to grab a few snacks for himself and some food for me. Jungkook though had to go to the store as we were out of meat. He had just left when I felt the first contraction. I whined and tried to relax a bit.

Even though I was half human and half wolf, the delivery would be wolflike. I licked by my hind legs, and tensed my body ready for the birth of one of the pups. I howled a few times, before one of the pups came out. I immediately, turned, grabbed the sac covering the pup and began to eat it, allowing the pup to breathe. I licked the wet body, and it clamored closer in order to start suckling milk.

I could feel another pup coming and I huffed trying not to displace the first pup. Just then the door opened and Jungkook came back. He opened the nesting room door, only to hear me whine at him, looking pathetic.

“Oh man, holy shit,” he muttered before rushing to call the other’s. I whined and continued to attempt birthing the second pup. It felt like forever, but finally the second pup was born. This time though, as I went to clean the pup, another snout pushed me away. It was pure black and I looked into the eyes of my head Alpha. I put my head back down and he began the process of cleaning the pup.

Jin came over in human form, but Yoongi did not growl at him. He knew this was part of his pack. Jin began to soothe me, patting my head and feeling my stomach.

“Yoongi there’s at least one more pup,” Jin told his Alpha who paused in cleaning the pups to give a rumble of acknowledgement.

“Hey, beautiful,” Jimin came over, to shift into his wolf form. He started to lick all over my muzzle, which I leaned into with a petulant and tired whine. I let out a yelp as the pain started again. My paws searched for purchase, only to flail in the air.

“You are doing well,” Jin stated, running a hand down my tense and tight stomach. “Good girl.” I whined and tried to relax enough to pass the pup, but fell back panting. I had no more energy to give. Yoongi stopped his grooming for a moment to nudge at my head. It was his way of giving me strength. I closed my eyes, and started the process of birthing the third pup. Did I ever hope that this was the last pup. After about ten minutes, the third pup was birthed.

I whined as Jimin lavished my head with licks as Yoongi took care of the pups. The pups started to suckle, the newest addition starting a few moments later. Jin ran a hand down my stomach and seemed satisfied with how it calmed down.

“I think that’s the last one,” Jin stated and I huffed in relief. The rest of the pack all came in and shifted into wolf form. Yoongi snapped a lot, but calmed down as he curled around my form. I remained awake as the pups wiggled around, grabbing one when it was close to being lost. They yipped but settled down, as my tail curled over them.

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The alpha’s kept watch, never leaving the nest alone. This would happen for the next few months until the wolves could shift into their human skins. As such I remained in my wolf form, since they required sustenance whenever they awoke.

Pups brought a pack together, making them more protective. Alpha’s were more protective in this time, growling at anyone and everyone. This could include members of the pack if they were too forceful or threatening. As an omega, I was expected to bear with this, let them do everything. I wasn’t complaining, it took a lot of energy to feed the pups.

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Chapter Text

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Seokjin and I had been together for nearly eight months. He knew about my issue because it wasn’t that easy to conceal. I mean I had a dog that I had to have follow me around every minute of every day.

At the beginning when he had no idea why I was taking my dog everywhere – including restaurants. When they allowed my dog into the restaurant with no questions asked, I had to explain to him the purpose of my dog. This was when I expected him to run away, screaming that he couldn’t handle this, but Jin didn’t.

He listened to what the triggers were of my condition and listened to the signs as well as what to do if it were to occur. Jin was perfect about the entire situation. I was so happy to have him.

Suki and I moved into his apartment after we had been dating for several months. It seemed like the next logical step, so we took it. It didn’t mean that we were that intimate together – I wasn’t ready now and Seokjin respected that.

It just meant that Jin didn’t have to leave his sugar gliders with his mother, and we would save on rent. It was a win-win.

“Good morning,” I greeted Jin with a kiss, not even noticing the other guys who were seated at the table. Taehyung and Jungkook started to gag and I just rolled my eyes at their overexaggerating.

“You are just jealous,” Jin said to his dongsaengs who scoffed.

“Yeah, totally hyung,” Tae rolled his eyeballs and I got offended.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I put a hand on my hip. I started to smell something sharp like nail polish remover. I shook my head a little but continued to focus on Tae.

“It means that I’m not stuck with one girl,” Tae smirked. “I can go out and have fun.”

“Jin can go out and have fun too,” I was confused as to their reasoning.

“Thanks, baby, but I don’t think you mean the same fun as he does,” Jin kissed the side of my head. I felt the pins and needles start in my hands and fingers.

I didn’t want to have a seizure here and now. I prayed that it was just tired limbs, but then Suki lifted her head up. Now that I started to lose consciousness I felt something soft behind me.

**************************BTS*****************************

“Solemn?” Jin called out, his voice in a panic as he watched his girlfriend hit the floor. He didn’t make it to her side from where he had moved to lean against the counter, but Suki did.

Suki broke her fall like she had been trained to do, while Jin hurried to pull Solemn off the back of her companion. He laid her on the ground, counting the minutes until she started to convulse.

It took approximately another few seconds before Solemn’s limbs started to seize up and jerk in uncoordinated movements. Jin put her head in his lap and tried to hold her as still as possible.

“Hyung what can we do?” Jungkook asked, his eyes wide in his fear about Solemn. The boys had no idea about her seizure disorder; both Solemn and Jin had never thought that it was information that the guys needed to know.

“Can you go get the couch ready? She’s going to need to rest when it’s done,” Jin gritted out through his teeth as he used all of his strength to hold his flailing girlfriend.

He rolled her onto her side once the convulsing was subsiding. Not a moment too soon either as sick poured out of her mouth and onto the kitchen floor. Namjoon was quick to help Jin move Solemn so she didn’t have to lay in the pile of her own sick-up.

“Jimin, Yoongi can you get me a towel?” Jin asked his friends, not once looking up from his girlfriend. Suki whined and moved her head to lay on Solemn’s knees.

“What’s wrong with her?” Jungkook asked from the doorway. Jin sighed as he wiped her face after Jimin handed him the wet towel. Once she was cleaned off, Jin picked up her limp body and carried her into the living room where he saw the nest Namjoon and Hoseok had built.

Jin gently placed her down, in the recovery position. He knelt beside her as she was completely out of it and brushed her hair away from her face.

“Jin, hyung, what is going on?” Yoongi spoke up, looking confused. Suki had been following along behind her and laid down, being very protective over her owner.

“Solemn has a disorder,” Jin started running a hand through his dyed hair.

“Why didn’t you say that before?” Namjoon asked curiously, not looking angry but more curious.

“Solemn didn’t want for anyone to look at her different,” Jin sighed.

“We wouldn’t!” The maknaes protested. Jin raised both of his hands in the air as if in surrender.

“She didn’t tell me either until I questioned why her dog was allowed in this upscale restaurant,” Jin laughed weakly.

“Oh,” Namjoon nodded his head before sitting down beside Solemn and petting her hair back from her eyes. “I do apologize Jin-hyung.”

“Nah, man it’s cool. It’s a small price to pay when I have Solemn,” Jin smiled and his group members all gooed at him. Jin rolled his eyes before grinning.

“So like how often does this happen?” Taehyung asked, curious and peering over the back of the couch at Solemn’s resting body.

“Not too often – but often enough for her to have to take medicine. Sometimes lights can cause her to have a seizure,” Jin said as she started to stir a little.

“Hey baby,” Jin greeted her gently as she lifted her head off the nest of blankets.

“Jinnie?” Solemn’s eyes filled with tears as she couldn’t remember what had happened or why she was here. Jin also knew that having a seizure always made her very emotional so he just gathered her up in his arms and started to comfort her.

“Hoseok can you get me a bottle of water?” Jin asked his friend, rubbing comforting circles on his girlfriend’s back. Hoseok nodded his head and went off to get a water bottle. Solemn just continued to cry. “Come on baby, don’t cry.”

“I can’t stop!” Solemn wailed, her fists clutching the black band tee fabric as she buried her face into his chest.

“It’s okay Solemn,” Jin soothed, pulling her closer to him. She just continued to cry, a normal response once she was in recovery from her seizure.

“I did it again, didn’t I?” Solemn finally calmed down enough to sniffles. Jin nodded his head. “In front of everyone too?”

“It’s okay,” Namjoon was the first to speak up and Solemn jumped which caused Jin to chuckle a little bit. “We don’t think of you any differently.”

“Everyone always treats me differently,” Solemn pouted as she moved her head away from Jin’s chest. “People treat me like I’m a glass doll once they find out.”

“I don’t,” Jin protested but Solemn shook her head.

“You do treat me differently. I mean I like it, don’t get me wrong, but I know that you are treating me differently than you would normally treat any other girl. You constantly make sure that I am alright, even going so far as to text me!” Solemn burst out but then her face looked stricken as she stared up at Jin.

“I didn’t - ”

“No, Jin! I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it like that! I love that you take care of me, I just get moody after my episodes,” she whispered playing with her fingers. The guys all smiled as they could see some of Jin’s nervous habits rubbing off on Solemn.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Jin was quick to reassure her. “I can stop texting you all the time  - “

“No!” Solemn was quick to stop him. “I like it I do! I just - ”

“Wonder if he’s treating you differently,” Yoongi piped up and Solemn nodded before resting her tired head on Jin’s chest once more. “Trust us, he’s just as clingy with them.”

Solemn laughed as Jin gasped in mock denial. Jin knew that he was clingy, but even more protective over Solemn as he didn’t want anything to happen to her.

“Yeah Solemn, don’t worry. This is Jin-hyung’s normal way of being in a relationship,” Hoseok winked playfully.  Solemn just blushed and continued to cling to Jin who didn’t mind at all.

Free cuddles!

 

************************Solemn***************************

Three months later and the guys were leaving for tour. Jin was hesitant to leave me by myself as the seizures had been getting worse and worse. I assured Jin that he was fine to go – I had been living with seizures for much of my life.

He was hesitant though – I couldn’t blame him – but he had fans and a life to lead. I could only kiss him on the cheek and promise to keep in touch with him. Jin also made sure that his mother or one of his family members would come around the house during the day to check up on me.

Suki and I got along great – we made a great team. She would keep me from getting injured and I made sure to reassure Jin and his family that I was alright.

I had multiple appointments with neurologists who wanted to do some type of experimental surgery on my brain. I didn’t want to do it, since the potential risks outweighed the chance of my being better.

They told me that if I didn’t do this, my life expectancy wasn’t very high. Even with the surgery I was only expected to live for a few more years at the most due to the brain damage I was incurring.

I guess I should rephrase that – I would live, just not as I was today. It would be more difficult for everyone involved. Jin would have to either put me in a home or have a 24/7 care nurse. That wouldn’t be good for anyone and I don’t want him to have to go through that. I wouldn’t want him to have to deal with that now, or then.

I decided that it was time to call my best friend Mercy and see what she advised me to do. I had no idea – I didn’t want to put Jin through anymore grief than I already was putting him in.

That’s why I decided it would be for the best to just distance myself from him. I started responding to his texts less and less. I kept our conversations short and to the point while I feverishly searched for another house.

~Baby did I do something wrong?

~Are you alright?

~Baby talk to me

~Solemn

~Solemn I need to know that u r alright

~I’m going to send my mother over to check on u

~Solemn?

 

~Hey Solemn, Jin is worrying his head off. Plz answer his texts . . . . Namjoon

~Sol Jin-hyung is panicking. Noona respond . . . . Jungkook

~Solemn what’s wrong? R u sick? Do u need us? . . . Jimin

~ Solemn if we find out you are ignoring us. . . .  Yoongi

~Solemn text us back! ~Hoseokie

~Solemn, noona, Jin’s killing us with dad jokes . . . Taehyung

 

~Solemn, baby, please don’t ignore me.

~I’m beggin u, baby, plz answer me

~Eomma is going there

 

I turned off my phone and left it on the small bed in the dingy apartment that I could afford. It was small, in a bad area of town, but this way I wouldn’t have to worry about Jin.

Jin would be able to get over me. He had hundreds of thousands of Jin girls that would die for the chance to be with him. Girls who do not have as many problems as I do, so he would be able to live his life in happiness.

Suki whined on the bed as we lounged in the dark room. There was mold covering the walls and I thought that I saw a cockroach in the corner. It was disgusting here, but I wouldn’t be around long enough to actually enjoy it. At least that is if the surgery goes south.

If I actually survive it, which takes about two months to recover, then I can surprise Jin by being healed! That is if he wants to talk to me ever again.

My plan failed when that night I had a massive seizure and fell onto the floor of the grocery store. Suki whined as my blood pooled around my head and the manager shouted for an ambulance.

I woke up in the hospital, surrounded by machines and my head bandaged. I was groggy and tried to sit up, but the pain made my whole body throb. I groaned and sank back down on the soft mattress and hit the call button for the nurse.

“You are finally awake,” the nurse said with a smile as she came in with a clipboard. She looked at me, and redressed the bandages.

“Where am I?” I asked a little dazed.

“Seoul General Hospital,” she replied. “You have been unconscious for the past four days. We contacted your ICE; he’s in the waiting room with six other guys.”

“What?” I gasped, sitting upright. She nodded and gently pushed me back down.

“I’ll let them in,” the nurse smiled and walked out the doors. I groaned and sank back into the warm pillows.

“Hi,” Jin’s blond hair peeked through the door first, followed by his tall body.

“Jin,” I said quietly as the rest of the group trooped inside. Jin came over to my right side and grabbed my hand.

“How are you feeling?” I blinked a little, still feeling out of it.

“My head hurts,” I mumbled as I squeezed onto his hand.

“We brought you this,” Jungkook mumbled, holding up a large teddy bear. I smiled weakly and let Namjoon place it beside me.

“Baby, how are you doing?” Jin asked, concern in his eyes.

“Um,” I was confused over why he was asking me this.  “Why?” I asked him, scrunching up my brow.

“What’s the last thing you remember?” Jin asked, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on the back of my hand.

“Going to my doctor’s visit. He told me about the new surgery. It was the first time I had heard of it,” I said, bewildered. “You shouldn’t be here! You all are supposed to be on tour! Thailand isn’t that right?”

“I’m going to go get the doctor,” Namjoon said after a brief moment of silence.

“Baby what is the date?” Jin asked me.

“May 22nd,” I replied. “But she said I was asleep for four days. Is it the 26th?”

“Oh, baby no,” Jin looked pained.

“It is July 31st,” Yoongi interjected. Jin shot him a look as did Jimin and Hoseok looked upset.

“I’ve lost two months?” I asked them and they all nodded. Just then Namjoon came in with the doctor who sighed as he looked over my chart and test results.

“Solemn I told you this would happen about a month and a half ago,” the doctor said shaking his head.

“What?” Jin asked, his brows furrowing in his confusion at this bit of information.

“She didn’t tell you?” The doctor raised an eyebrow. “I offered Solemn a chance at a surgery – the success rate is small but the price is high if it works. Otherwise her body is failing – Solemn is already experiencing brain damage. That is why she cannot remember what the date is right now.”

“Is that why she stopped texting me?” Jin asked.

“What do you mean?” I asked, butting in. “I always text you!”

“Baby, no offense but you can’t remember the last two months,” Jin said in a gentle, yet admonishing tone. I instantly quieted and tried to concentrate on remembering what had happened.

The only thing that happened was my headache increased. I groaned and put a hand to my head. The doctor noticed and gave me some pain killers.

“What about this surgery?” Jin asked. The doctor sighed and shrugged his shoulders.

“We should talk in the hallway,” the doctor motioned to Jin who dutifully followed the doctor out the doors. I was left with the other six who talked with me about what they had been doing during the past few weeks.

“Guys can I talk with Solemn alone?” Jin asked as he came back inside. They all nodded and wished that I would feel better soon.

“Honey, we need to talk,” Jin breathed. I stared up at him with my green eyes. “Solemn the doctor explained to me the surgery. I think you should give it a try.”

“But!” I protested. “He said that the chance for survival is low!”

“Solemn, the doctor explained everything to me. I wish you would have, but I respect why you didn’t in the months previous,” Jin took in a deep breath before clutching at his head. “Look, if you don’t get this surgery the doctor said that the damage is progressing rapidly, more so than he thought a few months ago. Either way, this could end in your not - ”

“Living, breathing?” I finished for him. He nodded and I noticed how red his eyes were. “All right Jin. I’ll try it.”

“Oh, thank god,” Jin breathed and went to pull me in for a kiss.

“Jin! I’ve been unconscious for four days! I probably smell really bad! And my breath!” I pulled away from him, but he just rolled his eyes and kissed me anyway.

“I love you so much,” Jin said with a grin.

“When is the surgery?”

“Well the guys and I pushed the tour back two weeks due to personal problems. The fans understood – their tickets are still valid, just for a later viewing of the show,” Jin said with a grin.

“How did you manage that one? I mean I thought the venues were booked in advance?” I asked him, curious over how they managed to get through it.

“Because people think we’re handsome!” Jin grinned as the other boys came inside the room. “Ow!”

“Shut up JIN!” Hoseok screamed and we all started to mess around.

“All right, Solemn,” the doctor came in. “I can schedule the surgery in two days.”

“Okay,” I looked over at Jin and the other guys who all looked worried about the surgery that was going to take place.

 

Two Days Later

The guys and I had gone home – they stayed at our house, but last night they had left to go out to a club. Jin and I stayed home.

That night I was ready to go the next step with Jin. Jin was extremely worried about this, but I assured him that I wanted to do this. I wanted to spend my potentially last night with him as I have wanted to do for ages.

Jin was gentle, caring, and very sweet. I had honestly no idea that this is what love was. I craved his touch and responded to every caress. Once we were done, we lay there in the quiet, just being together.

“I love you,” I finally said, rolling over to rest my head on his broad shoulder.

“I love you too Solemn,” Jin said with a smile before he brushed a kiss to my forehead. Before I fell asleep I felt like my feet were going numb.

 

****************************BTS****************************

Jin woke up with a jerk as the bed started to shake violently. He was quick to grab a hold of Solemn and try to keep her still. It didn’t work so he screamed for the others to come.

“Hyung, what’s wrong?” Namjoon was the first in the room. He went silent when he saw the scene in front of him.

“Joonie!” Jin was sobbing as he kept his girlfriend pinned down.

“Yoongi-hyung call 119!” Namjoon called before walking over to his friend and helping him keep his girlfriend steady. She wasn’t stopping this seizure any time soon.

“It should be over by now!” Jin was panicking, and sobbing at the moment.

“Hyung!” Namjoon snapped, trying to get the boy to stop his panicking.

“What the hell - ” Yoongi stopped what he was saying before he gasped and his phone dropped out of his hand. Jimin was quick to pick it up the phone and continue to wildly talk with the dispatch.

“Medics will be here in a few hyungs,” Taehyung spoke up from the doorway before grabbing Hoseok.

Suddenly blood started to pour from Solemn’s nose as well as her mouth from her bitten tongue. Jin started to sob harder as Namjoon tried to comfort him, but at the same time make sure that Solemn didn’t hit her head on anything.

“How long?” The paramedics rushed into the room as she was slowing down her seizing.

“Um,” Jin was still crying so Joon motioned to Jimin who looked at the phone.

“Um, the phone call was placed 12 minutes ago, and it was before that,” Jimin said and the paramedics tried to hide the panic on their faces.

“Okay,” the paramedics said before they started to remove the girl from the house.

“Wait!” Jin called out, grabbing a pair of sweatpants and a band tee, rushing after them.

“We’ll meet you at the hospital hyung,” Hoseok said as they all scrambled to get ready. Jin was crying as the paramedic started an IV line and took the vitals. They called into the emergency room with a stat.

As they got into the emergency room the wrist monitor started to beep alarmingly. The nurses and doctors crowded around, pushing Jin to the side as his friends got there.

“Get the AED!” The doctor yelled and a nurse handed it to him as they wheeled the sick girl into an empty OR room. They worked on her, doing the AED, but she remained flatlined.

“Mr. Kim?” The doctor emerged from the room about an hour later; he looked exhausted. The four guys in the waiting room looked up, their eyes red and swollen.

“Is she?”

“I’m afraid that Solemn Rose has passed on this evening,” Doctor Ahn told the young guys in the lobby. Kim Seokjin fell to his knees and started to sob as the other members of the group looked at the doctor in disbelief. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

A nurse came around the corner and pulled Namjoon and Yoongi aside. She handed them a bunch of pamphlets as well as recommendations about where the guys could go in order to get help and therapy. Namjoon thanked her and they all went into the room – with the permission of the doctor to say their goodbyes, privately.

 

The day of the funeral dawned and everyone was somber, a fragment of their normal selves. The boys’ mothers all attended the funeral as well as Mercy, Solemn’s friend. Mercy had explained to Jin why Solemn had decided to leave Jin and handed him a letter that she had written in the month prior to her death.

Jin and the boys all wore their usual black skinnies and nice black button-ups. It’s what Solemn would have wanted them to wear. She was dressed in a beautiful silver sheath dress, with silver heels that Jin had found in the back of her closet.

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Before the sermon, Jin had walked over to her side and stuck an empty ring box beside her, a chain around his neck which bore the weight of the engagement ring that he was going to give to her at the end of the tour.

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No one said anything, Namjoon and Yoongi both had a hand on Jin to help comfort him as the body was lowered into the Seoul ground. Jin placed a bouquet of lilies on her casket – they were her favorite in the world.

All around twitter the hashtag #RIPSolemn, #PrayersforKimSeokjin, #WemissyouSolemn, and #BTSneedscomfort were trending for the next few weeks. The fans knew that their heroes needed some time to grieve so they started a petition to let the boys have the next few months off.

Jin visited Solemn’s grave every day over the course of the next six months until the beginning of their next tour. Then he had florists deliver a fresh bouquet of lilies every week – fans sent flowers every day for Solemn. The crowd cried whenever Jin would say something sweet and reminiscent about Solemn – This one’s for you. Or Those who mean the most are taken the fastest. They also brought Jin gifts – his favorite coffee, his favorite candy, some even brought him food.

All in all, the support Jin received from his family, friends, and fans helped him in the long run. He wasn’t over Solemn by a long shot, but he was beginning to move on. Though twenty years later, he would have to explain to his children why he wore that ring around his neck. And the pain would shadow his brown eyes, darkening them to a black while he spoke about Solemn and her dog Suki.

 

 

Chapter Text

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It was during VidCon that one of my fans came up to me with the idea that I prank Jeon Jungkook, my boyfriend. He had been with me through thick and thin, through the death of my parents, and kept me alive through my depression. I grinned as she came up with an excellent idea for a prank.

That night I set up a camera in my room with the help of my best friends, Jack and Finn Harries who hurried to help me set everything up. Some of my fans thought that I should be with Finn Harries, but Jungkook, Jack and Finn, and I knew that there was no way that I would ever cheat on Jungkook with either one of them.

“Hello! How are my best people in the world doing? This is me! Of course, it is!” I giggled. “I’m joined today by JacksGap channel – Jack and Finn!”

They popped out from off the floor into the view of the camera, Jack hitting me in the head. I groaned and clutched dramatically at my head as did Jack, while Finn was in hysterics. Finally, Finn calmed down and asked if we were alright.

“Just great Finn,” I moaned.

“I think you’re going to have quite the shiner!” Finn moved my hand to see the damage. I scowled at him as he left his brother to fend for himself.

“Anyway, Jack and Finn are here!” I grinned. “Round of applause for Finn Harries, please!”

“What about me?” Jack protested.

“Not a round of applause for someone who literally gave me a black eye!” I scowled at him. “What is Jungkook going to think?”

“I’ll explain it to him. Don’t worry, love!” Jack grinned and I rolled my eyes.

“You can’t speak Korean? Anyway, we are here at VidCon and I have JacksGap here to help me film this little video. One of my fans asked me to do it, so here I am! I am fulfilling requests. The SONG TEXT PRANK! On Jeon Jungkook! So I am going to do Cleopatra by the Lumineers because I don’t think that he knows this song, and it actually really matches us quite well.”

“I can’t wait to see the responses!” Finn waggled his eyebrow and I shoved him playfully.

“Alright, and we begin!” I giggled. “First line Jack!”

 

I was Cleopatra, I was young and an actress

 

“Guys I just thought what if he’s busy? He doesn’t text me back?” I asked them.

“Then text Dan or something!” Finn suggested.

“Then I’d have to find a new song, Finn!” I said before Jack interrupted my little fit.

“He’s typing.”

“Oh thank God,” I muttered as we watched until he finally answered, which I translated to English.

 

You definitely rival Cleopatra, my queen!

 

“How cheesy!” Jack grinned and my cheeks turned red.

“Alright. Next line, Finn.”

 

When you knelt by my mattress, and asked for my hand

 

“Well that’s an interesting line,” Jack commented.

“Would you shut up?” I asked him as we waited for the response.

“Seriously, though, did he ask for your hand?”

“Would you both be quiet JacksGap?” I asked them. “He’s typing back.”

 

Honey, are you feeling okay? I don’t remember this.

 

“Gotta love Jungkook!” Jack laughed as I went to go to type another line but then noticed Jungkook was typing something back again.

 

This would have been a monumental time in my life. I know I would remember a proposal.

 

“Aww,” Finn nudged me.

“Next line guys!”

 

But I was sad you asked it, as I laid in a black dress

With my father in a casket, I had no plans, yeah

 

“Well that’s depressing,” Jack stated and I rolled my eyes.

“Jungkook was with me when my parents died, so,” I said to them and they both grinned. They knew this already, but they were cheeky guys.

 

Baby, are you feeling okay? I can Skype or Facetime you. Are you feeling sad?

And we made plans, yeah?

 

“See this is the perfect boyfriend, girls!” I said into the camera and the twins both rolled their eyes at me.  “Next line British Gents!”

 

And I left the footprints, the mud-stained on the carpet

And it hardened like my heart did when you left town

 

“Wow. Way to rip out his heart there, Aria,” Finn commented reading the lines out loud.

 

Baby if you’re feeling that sad, you know I’d fly you out here.

Let me know if you want to come out.

I’m sure the hyungs wouldn’t mind.

They love you like a sister.

 

“Awww,” Jack cooed at the messages. I felt bad.

“Guys I feel so bad that I’m doing this to him,” I stated.

“Come on, YouTube Girl. Let’s get it done!” Finn stated.

“Next lines please.”

 

But I must admit it, htat I would marry you in an instant

Damn your wife, I’d be your mistress just to have you around

*that

 

What?

Do you think I’m cheating?

I don’t have a wife.

If I did, it would be you, so you would never be my mistress J

 

“Wow,” Jack and Finn both gasped as they read the texts. I rolled my eyes at them. “How is he?”

“So perfect? Wonderful? Kind?” I asked them filling in the blanks. “Next lines please!”

 

But I was late for this, late for that, late for the love of my life

And when I die alone, when I die alone, when I die I’ll be on time

 

Aw baby. You won’t die alone

I’ll be with you every step of the way.

Seriously, though, do I need to call you?

 

“Wow,” Jack and Finn were still amazed at Jungkook’s responses.

“I know right. He literally thinks that I am being serious. . . Oh boy,” I sighed. Jack provided me with the next two lines.

 

While the church discouraged, any lust that burned within me

Yes my flesh, it was currency, but I held true

 

Whoa! You should slow down!

You know how you get me ;)

 

“That’s just disgusting!” Finn exclaimed and I rolled my eyes.

“Shut up Finn,” I sighed. “We’ve been together for like five years!”

“Yeah, it’s bound to happen,” Jack stated cheekily at his brother. 

 

So I drive a taxi, and the traffic distracts me

From the strangers in my backseat, they remind me of you

 

“What is Jungkook going to think?” Finn giggled at these lines. My door opened and Dan Howell walked in.

“What’s Jungkook going to think about what?” Dan asked, and we all started to laugh.

“We are in the middle of doing a SONG TEXT Prank on Jeon Jungkook! Say hello Dan!”

“Hello, Dan!” Daniel waved cheekily at the camera.

“You know what I meant!” I sighed. “Everyone, here at VidCon there is no privacy! Whoop!”

“I see how it is,” Dan sighed as he sat down behind me on the hotel bed.

“Can we continue onward? The video is going to be like an hour long!” They all nodded and we continued to do the prank.

 

I was taller than the rafters

But that’s all in the past now, gone with the wind

 

“Now what?” Dan whispered loudly. I rolled my eyes and groaned at them all.

“We wait for Jungkook to reply!” Finn, Jack, and I all hushed him as we watched the dots blink on the bottom of the screen, signaling that Jungkook was typing a reply.

 

You said it not me J

We all know who the shorty is.

Are you sure everything is alright?

 

“Next lines, hurry up!” I hissed to them. Jack and Finn recited off the lines and I texted them to Jungkook.

 

Now a nurse in white shoes leads me back to my guestroom

It’s a bed and a bathroom

And a place for the end

 

“He’s going to think that you are going to commit suicide, you know that right?” Dan sighed, rolling his eyes at my stupidity.

 

Alright. I’m going to call you.

Right now.

 

“Guy’s he’s calling!” I whispered as the ringtone rebounded around the room – it was Jungkook’s favorite BTS song – No More Dream. Well technically, Jungkook picked it and I was just too lazy to change it to another ringtone.

“Hello?” I answered the call and motioned for everyone to be quiet as I put him on speaker. His Korean accented English filtered through the room.

“Hey, Aria. What’s going on?”

“Nothing, why do you ask?” I asked, trying to keep my humor out of my voice.

“You’ve been sending me all of these texts, Aria. Do you want to come out and see us? After VidCon?” Jungkook asked, changing to Korean and I couldn’t take it anymore. I started to laugh.

“I would love to Kookie, but I got you!” I high-fived Jack and Finn.

“We got you!” Finn interjected in his British accent. I rolled my eyes.

“Wait Finn and Jack are there?” Jungkook asked.

“And Dan!” I interjected quickly.

“Whoa! I didn’t help out at all! I’m just an unwilling passenger!” Dan was quick to say.

“We all know that you were interested!” I giggled. “Anyway Kook, guess who got Song Text Pranked! You!”

“I’m going to get you back!” Jungkook sounded amused and devious. I gulped, a little afraid of what he could possibly do.

“What are you going to do?”

“You’ll see, love, you’ll see,” Jungkook promised.

“Well, that was a wrap! Guys go check out the links in the description, like, subscribe, and comment down below about whether or not you liked this video. I have three man-children to take care of, and a boyfriend to talk to! See ya next time!” And with that, I cut the video.

“Jungkook!” I complained and he had to be smiling.

“Watch your back, love. Have a great couple of days guys. See you soon!” Jungkook said before chuckling gleefully and yelling ‘Taehyung!’ before ending the call.

“Guys, I’m so dead.”

 

Chapter Text

http://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s480x480/e35/11925847_945324025505548_216235218_n.jpg?ig_cache_key=MTA2NjYxNTAxMjM4MDk4NjM4Mg%3D%3D.2

“Are you done yet?” I yelled, as we all assembled around the television. The show I was modeling for was going to be on, it was a major job for me. I hadn’t even told Taehyung, my boyfriend, the name of the modeling show I was going to be on. I wanted it to be a complete surprise.

“Why do I have to watch you prance down the runway?” Jungkook complained, coming out of the kitchen with an armful of snacks.

“The same reason why I have to tolerate and watch you in the mv’s and concerts,” I retorted as I took the remote from Hoseok. The hyungs all laughed at Jungkook who pouted and plopped down on the floor, sharing his snacks with Jimin.

“Why are you putting on the Victoria’s Secret show?” Seokjin asked when I turned on the show.

“Just watch,” I sighed and set the remote down, before reaching out for the carrot sticks that I was snacking on that night. Just because I had gotten my taste of being a famous model, didn’t mean I could just go off my diet. Everyone was quiet until I came out onto the runway.

“Noona!” Jungkook exclaimed, shocked at the fact that I was modeling lingerie for the world to see. Taehyung’s hand tightened and then slipped from mine.

https://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/thumbor/snkZpXtcIubld04SjtL1MbyAM5E/fit-in/1024x1024/filters:format_auto-!!-:strip_icc-!!-/2017/11/20/565/n/4981322/0b2eff53be8bc6c2_GettyImages-876613454/i/Victoria-Secret-Fashion-Show-China-2017-Pictures.jpg

“Did you know about this Tae?” Yoongi asked his dongsaeng whose jaw tightened in response.

“No, why didn’t you tell me?” Taehyung asked, and I turned the volume down.

“Tell you what?” I asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion. “I thought you would be happy for me. I mean it’s not everyday that a model gets to walk down the runway with the Angels,” I said, putting down my carrot sticks. “This is a big step in my career. I made a breakthrough. I’m creating a name for myself!”

“And you have to do it dressed like that,” Taehyung stood up.

“Taehyung, look at Miranda Kerr! You always used to exclaim over her,” I was confused over why he was reacting in this manner.

“But I didn’t mean for you to go out and get a job modeling like that!” Taehyung spat. “Not a ssibal geollenyeon!”

“What?” I gasped, the air leaving my lungs like a punch to my gut.

“No girlfriend of mine would ever do such a thing. I’d never date a ssibal geollenyeon!” He spat back, which made the other members gasp.

“Tae, please,” Jimin tried to intervene.

“Yah! Watch your language!” Seokjin said. I blinked back tears at this statement.

“I understand,” I said, voice surprisingly steady. “It’s fine Jimin, guys. At least he spoke his mind.”

“Whatever,” Taehyung snapped before leaving the room.

“Noona,” Jungkook stated as I stared down the hallway for a moment.

“No worries. I’m going to go,” I said, walking towards the door with a heavy heart.

“Aria, he didn’t mean it,” Namjoon tried to state.

“Namjoon-ah, honestly it’s fine,” I smiled, but it came off a bit wooden. “I have to go. Thanks for having me over.”

“Aria, please don’t leave like this,” Hoseok implored while I shrugged on my coat and shoes.

“I have a shoot in the morning,” I lied to the cheery one of the group. “It’s best if I leave now. Again, thanks for everything guys. I appreciate it.”

With this statement I left the dorm. I didn’t look back – I had said my goodbyes. It was time to leave and go to my apartment. As well as contact my manager and let him know that I would accept the position after all. I had asked for time to think it over, but with this, there was no way that I could remain. Nothing to keep me here, anyway.

I was numb the entire time back to my apartment. I didn’t even feel the tears sliding down my cheeks as I set the keys in the little glass bowl which usually held two sets. I couldn’t think as I saw the numerous texts blowing up my phone, only using it to tell my agent to book me for that job. He told me to be ready and packed tomorrow since the plane would leave at noon.

I had way to much to do at this point than to sleep, so I changed my outfit and packed the belongings I would need. By the time I was done, and showered, it was already 6 in the morning. I put the bags by the door and left. I had to visit the local Samsung store where I added another line for my new phone, before I shut down the other one. I called my manager on the new phone, stating that I dropped the other one.

By 8:30 am I was in the car on the way to Incheon airport. I didn’t have to think of anything as I stared out the window at the passing scenery. The check-in was silent, and my manager was worried. He kept asking me how I was doing. Then he asked if Taehyung knew.

“We don’t have to worry about that any longer,” I stated, voice as cold as Min Yoongi’s when he is woken. “He’s made it abundantly clear what he thinks of me.”

With that said we left for Paris. I slept the duration of the flight, only getting up to use the bathroom. We landed in Paris and we were met with the Karin individuals meeting us and taking us to our new place. I was happy each of us would live separately.

Thus, began my life as a model in Paris. I made new friends, friends who I wouldn’t have deemed worth my time if it weren’t for Kim Taehyung. He wanted to think of me as a ssibal geollenyeon when I wasn’t, then might as well live up to that reputation.

I partied every night. Most days I was hungover until the evening when I would go out to clubs and drink way too much. Sometimes I would wake up with a person in my bed who I had no idea their name. I would weep bitter tears as I thought of the person I was becoming, only to numb myself with the next shot of liquor.

I tried drugs too, but mostly stuck with the effects of alcohol. I made the tabloids, this time not for my modeling but for my partying. My fanbase was blowing up with the negative comments, which only caused me to party and drink more. At first they were sympathetic, knowing that I was going through a difficult breakup, but as the months wore on the fans were no longer putting up with my behavior.

**************************************BTS********************************************

“Taehyung oppa, have you seen the tabloids lately?” A fan asked during one of their fanmeets.

“No, I haven’t,” he professed to which the young fan frowned. Jimin turned his head to listen in on what had her so distressed.

“Oh. I thought you would have known. I guess it’s really over between unni and you,” the fan sighed.

“Known what?” Taehyung was confused so the fan fished her phone out of her pocket. She typed for a moment before pulling up a news article and showing Taehyung who paled. “No, I haven’t seen it.”

“Guess you never know a person,” the fan sighed and left the fanmeet since Taehyung was the last person at the table.

“What was that?” Jimin asked, voice quiet.

“Just google her name,” Taehyung’s voice was tight, before he broke out into a smile for the next fan. That night while Taehyung was in the shower Jimin googled Kim Aria in the news. He was shocked at the rapid deterioration as well as her new habits.

The news showed the articles of her being drunk to the point where she was stumbling, puking on the sidewalks as bodyguards drug her out of the clubs and into cars to be taken back to her apartment. One interview stated that she was never sober – always showing up to photo shoots hungover, and drunk before the clock stuck 8 pm. Karin was not considering another contract with her, since Aria was acting this unprofessionally.

Another article showed the press interviewing her parents. They stated that once her contract was done they were putting her into a rehab facility. They had attempted to get her out of the contract earlier, but they would have to wait the extra two months.

“Whatcha doing?” Hoseok asked, making Jimin jump.

“Hyung! Aish! Don’t sneak up on people like that,” Jimin sighed.

“Whatcha looking at that makes you all jumpy Jiminnie?” Hobi cooed, taking the phone from his dongsaengs hands. He froze after looking at the articles. “Who else knows?”

“I don’t know,” Jimin sighed. “I only sort of knew since a fan mentioned it to Tae today at the signing.”

“Jaenjang, this is bad,” Hobi sighed, running a hand through his damp locks of hair.

“What’s bad?” Yoongi crept out into the living room, scaring both inhabitants. He raised an eyebrow at them.

“We just found out something,” Jimin said, voice shaky. Yoongi nodded, expectant of being filled in to whatever it was that they were discussing.

“It’s Aria,” Hobi supplied and Yoongi scoffed, plopping down into his arm chair.

“You all finally found out?” Yoongi sighed, holding his head up with his hand.

“What do you mean?” Jimin asked.

“I’ve been keep track of her. It’s been a mess,” Yoongi sighed.

 

**********************************PARIS************************************

The girls and I went out on a final night before my contract ended. We were smashed, dancing with men, taking shots. It was wild, and probably around 4 am before I made it back to my apartment. It seemed like I had just stumbled onto my large bed, before I was being roused by my agent. He gave me a disapproving glance before demanding that I utilize the shower before our flight leaves.

I rolled my eyes as I did as I was told, stopping to vomit into the toilet, and trying to dull the pounding inside my skull with about six ibuprofens. I dressed in a pair of comfortable jeggings with a loose sweatshirt. My agent sighed as I stumbled into the living room with my belongings strewn into a carry-on. The ones that hadn’t been sent to Korea already.

“Let’s get going,” he snapped, texting on his phone.

“Whatever,” I muttered, and we left the place I had called home for the past hour. It was a silent flight, after I accepted a few drinks from the flight attendant. When we landed, my parents were there, waiting. I was given no choice, before being manhandled into the large, black Mercedes.

“Do you know how disappointed we are with you?” My mother said, my father reading his newspaper.

“What do you want me to say?” I asked them, twisting my fingers together, feeling the headache start to magnify.

“Don’t use that tone of voice with us!” My father thundered. “We want what’s best for you, and this is how you repay us?”

“I’m sorry,” I sniffed. “Nothing I say will matter anyway.”

“You’re lucky we are planning on sending you to the best rehab facility in the nation,” my mother scolded. “Act grateful.”

After that the drive to this remarkable rehab facility was silent. The only noise in the car was the sound of my mother’s fingers tapping on the screen and my father’s newspaper crinkling. I desperately wanted to ask for a drink but figured with that comment I would receive another lecture.

We pulled into the rehab facility, where I was checked in and given a private room. My parents waved and talked with the doctors, before leaving me all alone. I knew I wouldn’t see them again for weeks, months, until I was discharged. They would contact the doctors for status updates, but other than that, they wouldn’t come and visit their disgrace of a daughter.

The first few weeks were spent much like normal. A sullen individual not wanting to speak to their counselor. Someone who didn’t think that there was anything to change. Of course, deep down, I understood that I needed help, that I wasn’t this person. That the only reason why I was like this was due to what Taehyung had stated. How much that hurt me, but I wasn’t willing to address that. My counselor and I spent hours discussing benign topics which included everything from k-dramas to favorite colors.

It wasn’t until the counselor brought up music and mentioned BTS that I clammed up for the first time. That’s when she started to pry into my former relationship with vocalist Kim Taehyung. It was five weeks after I had been admitted, that I broke down. I supplied the counselor with what happened during our breakup, what hurtful words that he had thrown my way after seeing me on the Victoria’s Secret runway.

It was only after this, that I began to immerse myself in my treatments. That I had a zest for wanting to get better, to heal the wound that Taehyung had inflicted upon my heart. I was inside the facility for seven months. By the time I was released, I was back to my normal self.

My parents left me in my apartment, after ensuring that I had no alcohol, which I didn’t. They also hired a person and a new manager, who would check up on me whenever they could. I wanted to roll my eyes, but understood that I didn’t have the right to their trust at the moment. I just smiled and endured their overbearingness.

When I was left alone I just stood there. I remembered all the good times that I had within the four walls of my apartment with my ex-boyfriend and his friends. I took my phone from my luggage, my original cell-phone, and turned it on for the first time in almost two years. I was flooded with messages from all of BTS, even Taehyung. I noticed that Jimin, Hoseok, and Yoongi kept a constant stream of correspondence even if I didn’t answer.

It took me a moment before I composed a message and put it into the group chat, praying that their numbers stayed the same. I knew that Jimin, Hoseok, and Yoongi were all the same, but had no idea about the others. It didn’t take more than ten minutes when the phone blew up once more. I chatted with them for a while, until I received a private message – from Taehyung.

~ I wanted to apologize for what I said all those nights ago. I didn’t mean it, I was just upset and I hurt you. I can never forgive myself for what you went through. TT

~ Taehyung-ssi, please forgive yourself. I’m doing better now. It’s all in the past.

~ Aria-ssi, it was stupid and you suffered because of my jealousy. It’s not okay. TT

~ Taehyung-ssi, it’s fine. I should have known you wouldn’t say that kind of stuff.

~ Aria-ssi, please. Let me take you out to coffee. TT

~ Coffee huh? Sounds like a date. ^|^

~ Date? Good or bad thing? TT

~ It depends

~ How scandalous! TT

~ Sure. Let’s catch up. Our usual spot?

~ Yeah. I’ll meet you there, tomorrow at what 2? TT

~ In the afternoon?

~ Yeah, is it too late? TT

~ It’s just perfect.

https://tse2.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.cvF5L_2tyGG4IECUvlyrjAHaLH&pid=Api

The next day we met for coffee in the little café where we met initially. Our coffee preferences hadn’t changed in the months – years apart. We sat down and talked for hours, Taehyung turning off his phone when it started to vibrate every three seconds. I missed this, missed being with Taehyung who was so happy normally.

“Aria?” Taehyung asked, nervous as we stood outside the café.

“Huh?” I asked him, looking over at the man.

“I really liked this. Can we do it again?” Taehyung stated, looking hopeful.

“I missed this too Tae. I’d love to do it again,” I entwined our fingers together and he smiled, big and boxy. Then he dipped his head and captured my lips in a chaste kiss. I felt the warmth and tingling in my fingers as I looked into his eyes.

“I missed that too,” Taehyung said, breathless.

“Kiss me again, you fool,” I pulled him back down, our lips meeting again. This was what I was missing, what I had been yearning for. Taehyung learned that I would model for companies that he might not agree with, but he also understood that it was part of my job. I tried not to take jobs in which I was too exposed, but sometimes I would model lingerie and bathing suits.

Chapter Text

A/N: Sorry for the long update time - in the middle of finals and its been insane. Plus I am writing more of my original works for next semester and hopefully to finish writing my book. Enjoy!

 

Yoongi had been distant since the shape-shifter incident two days ago. Whenever I would try to talk with him, he would make his excuses and leave the room. I was becoming more and more frustrated as well as angry with him as he distanced himself. I also had a hard time sleeping, and this made my emotions unstable. So I took to attempting to sleep in my old room, as he wasn't sleeping in his anymore.

"You can't kill me Helia." I looked to see two Yoongi's in front of me. "How do you know which one is really your Yoongi?"

"Helia, love," the other Yoongi pleaded with me, causing me to point the gun I was holding at the first one.

"You can't shoot me Helia!" the first one protested. "I love you! I'm not the fake one, he is!"

I kept switching the gun around, trying to mentally figure out which one was which. Which one was the real Yoongi and which one was the fake. The only thing was, I couldn't tell.

"Do you know?" Yoongi number two taunted me. I shook my head frantically, trying to figure it out. "You'll kill the wrong one! I'm telling you, he's the fake!"

"The real Yoongi, Helia. Come on, shoot one of us. Which one is it?" Yoongi number one sneered at me. Shaking my head, I raised the gun at the second Yoongi and fired. He fell to the floor. Looking at the first one, he shifted, leaving his skin, Yoongi's skin, oozing everywhere. "Now you are mine." I screamed, realization setting in, as to what I had done.

"HELIA!" I woke up screaming and thrashing. I looked up at Yoongi who was sitting on the edge of my bed. "Sh. You're alright." Yoongi pulled me into his arms in an attempt to soothe me. I started to sob, pressing my head into his throat. "Shh."

"I killed you, Gi. You instead of it." I managed after several moments of being held in Yoongi's arms. My hot tears were streaking down my face, soaking into his crisp white dress shirt. He hummed, the vibration soothing as I could feel it running through my own body.

"I'm right here, love. You didn't kill me." Yoongi soothed, stroking my hair with his hand. My sobs began to lessen, until they stopped completely, leaving me hiccupping.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled into his chest.

"Don't be. It's alright." Yoongi said softly. "You've had a few stressful days."

"Why were you avoiding me?" I asked, making light doodles on his arm, which was exposed as he had rolled up his sleeves. He shivered at the motions.

"I wasn't trying to." Yoongi finally said. "It definitely wasn't intentional on my part. I had no wish to make you feel like I was avoiding you."

"But why did you?" I asked, my fingers still making their circles on his arm.

"I didn't want to upset you," Yoongi admitted, after a few moments of silence. "You killed the shifter who looked like me. I didn't wish to upset you further by reminding you of that."

"Gi." I sighed, grateful for his explanation. His fingers curled in my hair, stilling for a few moments.

"I didn't want to remind you of what you had to do," Yoongi said, resting his chin on my head. We sat there in one another's embrace for a while, until I broke the calming silence with a yawn.

"I better go," Yoongi said, shifting me off his lap and getting up. My breath hitched and I was like a little kid, not wanting my source of comfort to leave me.

"Yoongi, please," I pleaded in a small voice. "Stay?" Yoongi finally acquiesced and slid underneath the covers with me after he kicked off his shoes. I sighed and snuggled into his chest as he wrapped an arm around my waist.

The next morning,g I was awoken by Yoongi's slow and exaggerated movements. Opening my eyes, I was greeted with the sight of Yoongi, in his now crumpled dress shirt and pants, sitting on the edge of the bed. He was rubbing his back. I giggled which caused him to turn and look at me.

"I thought I was being quiet Helia." Yoongi said, while frowning at me good-naturedly.

"And you forget my father was marine. I am also a Hunter so light sleeping is kinda what I do." I grinned up at Yoongi who nodded at his information.

"Well tonight we are not sleeping on this mattress." Yoongi announced, wincing as his back popped quite loudly. "Actually, I will contact a company and get a new mattress. Dear God, I don't know how you've been able to sleep on it!"

"Uh, well, you've seen the kind of hotels that I used to sleep at." I stated, sitting up and letting the covers pool at my waist. I yawned and stretched, my red tank riding up as I did so, exposing my stomach.

"Unfortunately," Yoongi said dryly, standing up, after he grabbed his shoes from the side of the bed.

"So where are we sleeping tonight?" I asked innocently, raising my eyebrows at Yoongi. He swallowed nervously.

"Uh, well, my room I suppose, that is if you want to move back in." Yoongi said. I smiled widely at him.

"As long as you sleep in it." I fixed him with a pointed look.

"Anything for you, Helia," Yoongi smiled, finally relieved that the tension was gone. "However, you know that I won't be able to sleep all the time with you." I nodded, eager to continue the life we had before the skin-walker incident. He kissed me before exiting the room, to get ready for work.

I laid back on the bed and smiled widely. Finally, I felt like smiling after all the stress of the last few days. Now that Yoongi's distance had been explained, my whole body felt lighter. My cheeks were hurting by the time I joined Yoongi in the dining room for breakfast.

"Ugh! They are all idiots!" Yoongi snarled, snapping his newspaper down. By now I had gotten used to both Yoongi and Jungkook's random outbursts, so I didn't even flinch, just took another sip of my orange juice.

"Who are Gi?" I asked, setting the flute down.

"Parliament!" He snapped, eating his grapefruit and eggs.

"What have they done now?" I asked, before lifting the forkful of eggs to my mouth.

"I have to talk with a friend about this situation." Yoongi shot up from his chair. "Don't wait up for me tonight. Inform Eva to have a plate put up for me." He kissed me roughly before I could reply.

"Alright - " By this time Yoongi was gone. I blinked before finishing my breakfast. Then I informed Eva of Yoongi's wishes. She nodded.

"Miss Winchester?" She called from the foyer as I ascended the staircase.

"Helia, preferably Lia, Eva," I teased as I stopped and turned around to face her. She smiled.

"Mr. Min requested me to alert you to an envelope that is on the bedroom desk, specifically for you." I nodded before rushing up the stairs, wondering what was in the envelope.

All but running to the desk, I looked at the wooden surface. Yoongi had laid two white roses tied with a velvet ribbon on top of the envelope. I smiled as I opened the envelope, using not my finger but the cleverly laid silver and gold inlaid letter opener. It sliced right through the crisp, expensive paper.

My dear Helia,

I am leaving you a credit card. No limit so buy anything your heart desires, my dear. The only thing I request is that you buy an outfit for our date on Friday at the Landmark on the Marylebone Road. Please pick out a dinner dress my dear, as well as the necessary accessories, however, I will provide the jewelry.

Apologies on my behalf for not being able to spend the day with you, as well as being unable to tell you of our engagement on Friday in person.

All my love,

I smiled as a black credit card fell into my hands. I went into the bathroom, applied my make-up and brushed my teeth, before choosing an outfit. Deciding I needed to dress in something more than my jeans and cropped band tee, I opted for something a little different.

I chose a flowy black and white dress. I paired it with a pair of black wedges, added a blazer and an onyx necklace and bracelet. I smirked as I looked at my reflection in the mirror; Yoongi constantly complained about my lack of wearing the clothes he bought for me.

I snapped a quick picture of myself with the cell phone and sent it to Yoongi. Then I picked up the letter, credit card, and my knife, before shoving it all into a black clutch along with my phone. I took off down the stairs to have Eva there, at the door, waiting for me.

"Miss Winchester, there is a driver waiting to take you whenever you please." I nodded at her, this whole concept of a driver and housekeeper still so foreign to me.

"Eva, don't bother preparing lunch for me, as I probably won't be back to enjoy it." I smiled at her before getting into the waiting black Mercedes.

"Are you ready Miss Winchester?" The driver asked once we were underway.

"Yes, sir," I said before my phone alerted me to a new message. I pulled it out of the clutch to find a message from Jungkook.

~If you need help, let me know. – JK

"We're here." The driver announced before opening his door and making his way to open mine. Dropping the phone back into my clutch, not having answered the text, I got gracefully out of the sleek machine. Directly in front of Versace and other such designer stores; I looked back at the driver panicked.

"Why did you bring me here?" I asked him, feeling my heart beat wildly. This wasn't a store a Winchester dreamt of entering, let alone buy clothes in. This was a seriously expensive store!

"Mr. Min specifically requested it," the driver said, looking confused as to why I was reacting that way. My phone rang, and I numbly picked it up.

"Helia, what seems to be the problem?" Yoongi's soothing voice asked me.

"Yoongi this is Versace! I was expecting like a Topshop or Macy's, not this store! This is like the holy grail of expensive!" I hissed at my boyfriend, still standing on the sidewalk.

"Well the restaurant we are going to, requires fancy dress. Go into the shops and find a dress!" Yoongi told me in his firm voice. I shook my head frantically, knowing that he probably had his cameras on me so he could see. "Go on Helia."

"Yoongi I can't!" I pleaded with him, desperately.

"And why ever not?"

"Because I'm me. And I don't have the money to go buy a dress in a place like this." I sighed. "Especially not in Versace."

"Helia, you don't have to have the money. I do, which is why you have the unlimited credit card on your person. Plus, you are mine, so go into Versace." Yoongi reasoned with me, he was being gentle. "Go on now Helia. Try at least for me?"

"Alright." I assented to this request.

"And no sales rack. Don't pay attention to the prices. If you do I will have to have Anthea visit you." Yoongi said sternly.

"That's not a bad idea." I told him before hesitating in front of the doors. "A woman's opinion would be nice."

"I'll see what I can do." Yoongi said warmly. "Have fun and by the way you look lovely."

My experience at Harrod's wasn't as daunting as I expected. Anthea showed after I had been there for about an hour. Choosing a dress was harder than I anticipated. Finally, I was down to a red and clear gown, a short black and purple gown, a blue bandage gown, a satin or silk and velvet gown, a beautiful blue gown, and of course a short black dress.

"Which do you like best?" Anthea asked me after writing something on a piece of paper.

"The black and purple dress as well as the black dress." I told her. She nodded.

"Get them both." Anthea said as if that finalized everything. I shook my head.

"And that's over at least a million won just in two dresses!" I disagreed. "That's not even adding in purses, shoes, etc!" I cried out.

"And that's why you have the credit card." She gave me a smirk before handing both to the salesclerk who had followed us around. Our own personal shopper. The girl took them along with the name to the front desk, where they would be waiting for me to pay once I was through shopping.

Anthea took me to the shoes departments, amongst other departments, where I found a gorgeous pair of purple heels to match the dress. I added those without looking at the price tag, before making a detour to the men's department. Browsing through the dress shirts I found a deep purple for Jungkook and a royal blue one for Yoongi.

Finally I was done there, with plans to visit a shoe store named Office in Hongdae. I ended up spending almost five million won, but I just smiled and handed the clerk the card, while inwardly I was panicking. Then we were taken to Office where I found Rough Diamond black and green heels. There was only one pair of those left which I got along with a couple other pairs of shoes.

After paying for the whole ensemble, we left, Anthea to return to the office and I was carted back to the Manor. I thanked Anthea for her assistance as we all loaded up the bags into the boot of the car.

The next day I was reading a book, when my phone rang. It was a lovely day, no rain, so I was lounging by the pool. Yoongi had left early this morning, so I was all on my own.

"Hello?" I ground out, flipping another page in my book. It was brother Dean. "Alright. See you Friday." I went back to reading my book.

"Helia?" A shadow fell across me. Looking up I saw my boyfriend in just a checked dress shirt and his trousers, standing beside me. "How long have you been in the sun?"

"Like you don't already know, Gi," I teased my stoic boyfriend.

"Four hours." He admitted, sitting down beside me. Thankfully, Yoongi had enclosed the pool in a glass building which was heated. This way I could enjoy swimming and sun bathing year round. Granted Yoongi did have it put in before he knew me, but he didn't have much leisure time to enjoy it.

"Spot on," I smiled, before closing my book. "You're home early."

"I was able to conclude the majority of the crisis' and work from home." Yoongi kissed me gently. I stretched feeling much like a cat. His eyes eagerly roved over my bathing suit clad body.

I was wearing a red bikini. It had extra straps though that drew attention to my smallish waist. One of the other things I had splurged on while Anthea and I had shopped at those ridiculous priced stores.

"I knew you'd like it." I grinned at Yoongi. He snorted and shook his head. "Anyway my brothers are coming."

"Oh?" Yoongi quirked an eyebrow, obviously interested in this answer.

"Yeah. I told them they could stay here?" I said, more questioning than telling Yoongi that.

"Are you asking or telling me, dear?" Yoongi was clearly amused. I blushed and fought back the urge to hit him with my book.

"Yoongi!" I hissed to my impossible boyfriend. He shook his head before putting a hand on my stomach.

"It's fine Helia. Just fine." I tried to focus on anything but his warm hand. I failed miserably and then he began to stroke the skin. I swear I purred just like a car. "Looks like my girlfriend is a cat though." I blushed and batten him away before getting up from my spot.

"So, did Anthea already tell you the colors of my dress, so you could co-ordinate your outfit?"

"Yes, she did. Plus, I have some item to get for you, so - " I laughed.

"Of course, Yoongi. Of course."

I was a nervous wreck by Thursday. Yoongi noticed when he came home from the office. I paced the whole of his study until dinner. And at dinner I tapped my fork as well as fidgeted in my seat.

"Whatever is the matter?" Yoongi finally asked, before taking a sip of Claret.

"I'm just nervous, I guess. I mean I want you to hit it off with my brothers. And I want them to like you as well!" I ground out, stabbing the chicken cutlet on my plate with more force than necessary. Yoongi winced at the resulting sound but stayed silent.

"My dear, I'm sure I will get along with your brothers - ' I never found out what he was going to say because Castiel chose that moment to interrupt our little heart-to-heart.

"Cas?" I looked at him flabbergasted. Yoongi had no idea what to make of him either and just stayed silent.

"Helia. Good." He strode around the table and grabbed my arm. In a flash of light, we were gone and then in the middle of a dark, dimly lit kitchen. Hoping not to hurl, I closed my eyes for a moment.

"Cas?" My brother's voice rang through the kitchen. "What are you doing here?"

"Dean?" I asked quietly. Opening my eyes, I met the green eyes of my older brother, who was seated at the table.

"Helia!" I threw myself into his arms. Sobs wracked my body. Dean just soothed me, running a hand down my hair. "I'm here now. Shh."

"So, you didn't do too bad." Looking over Dean's shoulder I saw Sam with another guy.

"Sam," I breathed. My little brother looked up, his face serious until they caught my eyes and then his face lit up.

"Helia!" I broke away from Dean to find myself in the tight embrace of my little brother. Well he towered over me by like a foot, but he was still my little brother. I breathed in his scent which smelt like musk, cinnamon, and citrus. Dean always smelled like musk, grease, gunpowder, leather, and pine.

"How'd you get here?" Sam asked, leaning back to look me over. I blushed under his intense gaze. I was wearing a blue dress with jean leggings and a pair of steel toed black boots.

"Cas, brought me. I thought y'all were coming tomorrow?" I raised an eyebrow at my brothers, not paying mind to the unidentified male in the room.

"Yeah well a - " Dean stopped and grimaced before continuing. "A situation came up."

"What kind of situation?"

"Uh." Sam looked as helpless as Dean right about now. "Uh – let me introduce you to Adam."

"Our half-brother." Dean finished. I just stood there gaping at my brother. I felt like I had been socked in the stomach. All my air was gone.

Meanwhile in Seoul, Yoongi was a figure of controlled rage. His eyes glittered like sharp shards of ice as he paced the whole of the dining room. He took a deep breath before striding out of the room.

He made his way down the hallway to his office where he made a call to his personal assistant Anthea. She was quick to give him the answers he sought and even quicker to stay silent after he snapped at her. Disconnecting the call, he had to steady himself before making an important call to someone he was sure would have the answers he sought.

"Agent Willis," the man answered on the fourth ring.

"Let's not start with lies. Both you and I know you are not a real member of an intelligence agency, so please spare me." Yoongi said coldly to Bobby Singer, who sat stunned for a moment.

"Now wait just a damned - "

"Robert Singer, just answer my question. Where is Helia?"

"How do you know my name?" Bobby sputtered.

"Forget that. Where is she?" Yoongi hissed. Bobby sighed.

"Now look here. I don't know who you are or why you think I have that information- "

"Stop playing games." Yoongi desperately wanted to bang his head off his desk. Now he was not quite as keen to meet his girlfriend's family if this truly infuriating man had helped raise her. "My name is Min Yoongi and I am the bleeding South Korean Government. Now give me the common courtesy and let me know where I can find my girlfriend at?" Yoongi's face was an interesting shad of purple by the time he was finished. Some might say it was puce.

What everyone knew was that Yoongi's doctor would not have been pleased. His blood pressure was elevated, he was shaking, and on top of all that Min Yoongi had a pounding headache.

"Alright ." Bobby said after a few moments of contemplative silence on his end. "Did you call her?" Min Yoongi exhaled audibly and fought the urge to have bodily harm done to this man. As it was Bobby Singer would find a visit from one of Yoongi's personal acquaintances in the near future. Though he knew how much his girlfriend was attached to this man.

"Do you not think that I would have done that if Helia had not left her cell phone on the table in the living room?" Yoongi sneered at this man whom he considered to be mentally incompetent. Well he deemed everyone a goldfish, but this man seemed to be exceptionally dim.

"Ah, that idjit!" Bobby Singer sighed and Yoongi could hear the sounds of him sitting down. "Why don't ya start at the beginning? Then we can figure out what happened and where she may be at."

Yoongi agreed and began the story of meeting Helia from the beginning. He even included their plans for tomorrow. Then he finally concluded with the arrival of a strange man in a trench coat. He added Helia seemed to know the man and called him Cas.

Bobby was silent on the other end for a moment before letting out a stream of colorful curses. Yoongi simply shuddered at the coarseness of this man but tolerated him because he was Helia's family. And Bobby would help him find Helia and hopefully bring her home.

"Damn those boys." Yoongi perked up. "What have they got themselves in to?" And dragging her into it as well. Give me your number and I'll call you back."

"82 5555555556." Yoongi intoned.

"Alright. Look I can't promise I'll find out what's going on, but I'll try alright?" Bobby sounded tired as he told Yoongi this.

"That's fine. Let me know what you find out." Yoongi said just before the line went dead. He set the phone back before getting up from his chair. Min Yoongi stared out onto the lawn of his house, before turning and pouring a glass of scotch.

"What?" I looked between my brother's hoping that this wasn't some kind of practical joke they were trying to pull on me.

"Yeah. Apparently, Dad took him to baseball games, fishing, and even got him birthday gifts." Dean said bitterly.

A cold, hollow feeling was steadily growing inside of me. I felt sick, and like I wanted to run from this situation. I was in shock and I felt a pair of hands lower me into a chair. Then that person knelt in front of me.

"Helia?" I felt like I was listening through water. Everything was going in and out of focus, but I was quickly grounded when someone forced whiskey, from the taste, down my throat. I coughed, feeling the liquid fire burn through my whole body.

Everything became clearer and Dean's worried face came into focus. I quickly assessed myself and pressed my trembling hands together. But that was for nothing as my whole body was shaking.

"Helia? You ok?" Dean's hand tightened on my shoulder. I forced myself to nod before my focus turned to my newfound brother.

"Lia, I know it's a shock - " Sam began before I began to laugh blandly at his choice of words.

"A shock?" I raised an eyebrow at my brother. I barked out another laugh. "Aish Sam. I'd say a little more than a shock. Another brother I didn't even know about?"

"Spending a little too much time in Seoul, sis?" Dean smirked, sitting back on his heels.

"And you!" I rounded on Dean. "Don't even get me started on you." I turned my green-eyed gaze onto the guy that was the newest member of my family. "So, what makes you so special?"

"Huh?" Adam blinked at me, bemused. "I don't understand."

"Well it's just that the dad who was around for us, wasn't very often a father." I stated coldly. "He left Dean in charge of us, and if I'm going to be honest, I'm the person I am today because of Dean."

"Chick flick moment, Helia." Dean complained, but he looked touched at my comment.

"Shut up Dean. And I am a chick!" I looked back at Adam. "Dad treated us like soldiers. We were expected to do as he bid. Dad never once showed up for one of Sam's school functions, never cared about an interest of mine, and always placed the blame on Dean."

"Dad was never like that - "

"Well the man you knew of as Dad, is a delusional version of the strict Marine who ran our lives." I shot the kid a glare. "I lived in terror of disappointing the man or receiving another punishment. But in this lifestyle, you have to be willing to sacrifice your own happiness."

"What punishments?" Dean looked at me sharply. Sam seemed interested as well, but Adam was looking at the ground. I just shook my head. Dean dropped it but murmured 'later' at me.

"So why am I here?" I asked, just as Dean was about to answer, his phone rang. Holding up a finger he moved out of the room, talking animatedly to whoever was on the other end.

Bobby Singer sighed as he hung the phone back up. He wondered what those crazy kids of his were doing now. Since John's death, Bobby had taken on a more central figure in the Winchester offspring's lives.

He had been happy when Helia informed him of her new life in Seoul. Although she was still hunting, she had a life outside of the supernatural. For that, Bobby was happy. As well as what help she was to the hunters of the South Korea.

So that made him pause as to what had happened. Obviously Castiel had come to retrieve Lia, but why? What purpose did he have in taking her to her brothers?

His frown grew deeper as he thought of all the reasons Castiel would have in order to rip Helia from her life. He grabbed his cell phone off the desk and rolled down his list of contacts. Pausing at Dean Wincheser, he let out a sigh and pressed the green button to connect with Dean.

"Dean Winchester," Dean's gruff voice came through. Bobby paused.

"Dean is Helia with you?" Bobby finally asked his young protégé.

"Yeah, Bobby. Cas brought her, so we could have extra help on this case," Dean finally said, his tone screaming reluctance.

"Put your sister on the phone please." Bobby finally said. He listened to the muffled voices.

"Hey Bobby. What's up?" Helia's voice finally came across the line.

"Jesus Christ, Lia, ya idjit! Do you know how worried that Yooi feller is? And how worried I was when he called me?"

"Yoongi Bobby, and I'm extremely sorry for worryin' y'all. Castiel just kinda drug me here, ya know?" Helia's accent became more pronounced as she talked with her mentor.

"My apologies." Bobby spit. "Did ya even think of callin' him? Lettin' him know ya are alright?"

"Well, it crossed my mind, but I've been busy trying to figure out this creature Bobby." She sounded sincere.

"Well never mind that now." Bobby sat back in his chair. "I've promised to give him a call back, so anythan' ya want me to say?"

"Tell him sorry, I'll see him soon, and that this definitely isn't Versace." She said.

"Alright. Ya take care of yaself and those two idjits ya hear?"

"Of course, Bobby, loud and clear. Love ya too." Then the line went dead. Bobby got up and poured another whiskey, before picking up the phone to give a certain Min Yoongi a phone call.

Meanwhile, I hung up on Bobby and handed the mobile back to Dean. He slipped it in his back pocket as I listened to Sam regale Adam with stories of us hunting monsters. I smiled before turning to face my oldest brother, who was scowling.

"What's wrong, Dean?" I asked softly. He shook his head, not wanting to reveal his emotions. He had been convinced via Dad that to do so would be a weakness.

"He shouldn't be like us." Dean finally ground out. "Dad kept him from this life for a reason. I mean Dad even took him to a freakin' baseball game! And now Sammy is just handing him this life on a silver platter!"

"Dean," I attempted to soothe my irritated brother, but he just turned away.

"Nevermind!" He snapped. I went to say something else only to freeze in my seats at my younger brother's next words. It was the same speech my father gave Sam. The same speech that forced Sam to leave and not come back.

"Being a Hunter isn't a job, Adam. It's life. You're pre-med. You've got a girlfriend, friends? Not anymore you don't. If you're really gonna do this, you can't have those kinds of connections – ever. They're weaknesses. You'll just put those people in danger – get them killed. That's the price we pay. You cut 'em out and you don't look back. There's only one thing you can count on – family."

"Sam?" Dean and I both stood up. "Can we talk to you?" Sam got up and left Adam to study the book while following us into the hallway.

"What the hell was that?" I hissed, wondering if my little brother had lost his mind or not.

"What?" Sam looked confused as to why we were so angry.

" 'Hunting is life. You can't have connections'." Dean spit out, looking at Sam as if he had grown another head.

"Dad gave you exact same speech remember Sammy? It was just before you ditched us for Stanford!" I exclaimed.

"You hated dad for saying that stuff, and now you're quoting him?" Dean and I had equal looks of disbelief on our faces.

"Yeah well, turns out Dad was right." Sam said.

"Since when?" We both chorused.

"Since always." Sam stated. "Dean, Helia, when I look at Adam, you know what I see?"

"A normal kid?" Dean snapped.

"An innocent?" I cut in.

"No. Meat." Sam stressed. "Because to all the demon's and monsters out there, that's all he is. I hated Dad for a long time, I did. But now I think I understand. So, we didn't have a dog and a white picket fence. So what? Dad did right by us. He taught us to protect ourselves. Adam deserves the same."

"Listen to yourself, man!" Dean protested.

"You think I'm wrong?" Sam asked. I understood Deans reasoning as well as Sam's. I did the same thing to Minho when I got to Korea. He was normal, even though he had the training. He didn't deserve to spend it as a hunter. Adam though – more difficult. He was a Winchester, so he would need to have the knowledge to protect himself.

"I think its too late for us. This is our life." Dean stated. "This is who we are, okay? And it's fine. I accept that. But with Adam, he's still got a chance man. He can go to school. He could be a doctor."

"What makes Adam so special?" Sam demanded. With a jolt, I realized Sam was jealous. He wasn't jealous per se of Adam, but of his opportunities.

"What, are you jealous?" Dean asked incredulously, finally catching on to Sam's real reason behind turning the kid into a hunter.

In some twisted way, this was Sam's revenge. Revenge on Dad for never allowing him the same opportunities. It had been a bloodbath for Sam to be able to go to college. Dad never went to any of Sam's soccer games. Dean and I had never gotten into the whole extracurricular activities the school had offered. Not enough time, especially having to take care of Sammy. Bobby tried to make the three of us normal.

"Are you? Dean all this, isn't real. The Dad Adam knew, wasn't real. The things out there in the shadows – they are real." Sam stressed. "The world is coming to an end- that's real. Everything else is just part of the crap people tell themselves to get through the day. Dad didn't have a choice with us, but with Adam he did."

"Adam doesn't have to be cursed" Dean said, desperate.

"He's a Winchester. He's already cursed." Sam said.

"No." Dean suddenly exclaimed. "No. Whatever's hunting Adam I'm gonna find it."

"You already looked everywhere Dean!" Said said.

"Dean, please," I begged softly.

"Well then, I'll look again!" Dean snapped.

"Let me come with you." I followed Dean into the kitchen where he grabbed his jacket and gun.

"No. Stay here in case whatever is after Adam comes back." Dean smiled at me, his face softening. "Be careful, alright Lia."

"You too, Dean."

After Dean left the three of us boarded up all the vents and salted the windows and doors of the house. It was hard work, but finally we had finished. We only left the floor vent in the master bedroom, not boarded.

"All right." Sam said. "We've closed off every other way into the house."

"If this whatever it is, is coming, it has to come through here." I stated looking down at the vent. Then we heard a door creak and Adam looked at us.

"You were saying?" Sam and I exchanged looks.

"Adam! Adam! Adam!" I watched as my little brother's face changed to shock.

"Mom?"

"NO!" I cried.

"MOM!" Then he took off.

"ADAM!" Sam primed the shotgun and we followed him down the stairs.

"Mom!"

"Wait!" I cried out, helplessly.

"Adam, wait!" Sam said coming up behind him.

"It took me, but I got away!" Adam embraced the blonde woman from the photographs.

"It's ok." Adam soothed.

"I got away," she sounded slightly hysterical.

"Adam step away from her!" Sam had the shotgun pointed at the both of them.

"Sam what the hell?" Adam looked at the both of us confused.

"She's not your mother!" Adam put some space between them.

"Adam, who – What is going on?" His mother asked confused. At this point, I was confused as well. I had no idea what the creature was. It couldn't be a demon, since it was able to cross over the salt lines. Not a ghost either. I couldn't think of what this creature was. It was so frustrating!

"Get away from him!" Sam yelled.

"What is going on?" His mother demanded.

"You listen to me!" Sam discretely shielded me, as my weapons were not on my person at this time.

"It's really her, okay?"

"There was too much blood!" Sam yelled. "Your mother's dead!" He tried to pull Adam away, but he pulled the shotgun off of Sam. "There was too much blood in the vents!" I put my hands up to show I wasn't a threat.

"Adam!"

"Shoot it!" I screamed.

"He's crazy! It's me!" Adam was panicked, not knowing what to do. "Look! Adam its me!"

"That's not our mother!" Sam yelled.

"Shoot it!"

"It's not human!" Sam insisted.

"I know." Adam said before he slammed the butt of the shotgun into Sam's head. A split second later, it was heading towards my face, and connected.

When I finally regained consciousness, I tested my hands and feet. They were tightly bound. Feeling the warm, hard surface beneath my clothes, I figured that I was bound to a wood table. Turning my head, I saw my brother, tightly bound to a chair. He was still unconscious.

I was struggling against the bonds that held me to the table. Suddenly the faces of Adam and his mother came into view. They were smirking, and I let out a groan at what all Sam had taught Adam. The woman was cleaning her fingers with a silver knife.

"Silver. No wonder my brothers didn't figure out what you were, based off the tests. You're ghouls." She stopped.

"You know, I find that term racist." I let out a low chuckle and my brother began regaining his consciousness. The mother started sniffing me!

"Fresh meat. So much better than what we're used to." She smiled.

"I should have known." Sam groaned.

"Figured it out, brother dear?" I asked.

"Ghouls." Sam grunted. "The fresh kills were what threw me."

"Yeah, confused me as well." I conceded.

"Usually they are just scavengers, going after the already dead."

"Well we wanted revenge for our father." Adam said with a smirk, before he drew a knife across my forearm. I yelped and sucked in my breath before I grit my teeth.

"Leave her alone!" Sam thrashed against his bonds. The woman and Adam both grinned before the lady began to suck the blood from the wounds. "You're monsters!"

"You know you use that word a lot Sam." Adam plunged the knife he was holding into the table by my head. "But I don't think you know what it means. Our father was a monster? Why? Because of what he ate? He never hurt anyone Sam and Helia. Living, anyway."

"No." The woman started as Adam pulled the knife out of the table. "He was no monster. But the thing that killed him was. A monster named John Winchester." I grit my teeth as I felt the edge of the blade run over my chest. Adam suddenly plunged his knife in my side, causing me to cry out.

"Leave her alone! Let me take her place!" Sam insisted. Adam's knife was replaced with his fingers which he began to twist around inside the wound.

"Thanks to your daddy, my brother and I grew up on our own. At least we had each other." I tried to focus on the woman's face, but the pain was blurring it a little.

"Like you and your brothers; inseparable." Adam said, after he sucked my blood off his fingers.

"Actually, it was hard to get the youngest on his own." She sneered at Sam. "So, we had to take the both of you."

"Like you said Sam, the only thing you can count on is family." The woman began to feed on my arm again.

"And for twenty years, we lived like rats - "

"Graveyard after graveyard, all that stinking flesh." Adam and she began circling around me.

"So, we thought, 'hey why not move up to fresher game?'," I was trying to focus, but was failing miserably.

"And we knew just where to start." Adam dug the tip of his knife into the wound he had created earlier. I screamed.

"HELIA!" Sam yelled.

"Revenge – its never over is it?" Adam was still digging in my arm.

"First it was John's cop friend. Then his slut. And then his son." She sneered at us.

"Then I called John, but he was already dead." Adam grinned.

"So I guess Sam and you will have to do instead. Maybe Dean if we get lucky." She ran her hand down my face and I flinched away.

"Dean won't interrupt us this time." Adam leaned over until he was near my face. "We're going to feed on you nice and slow. Like we did with Adam."

"NO!" Sam was fighting against the ropes.

"Oh and by the way, he really was the two of you's brother. You should know that." She sneered. I tensed, trying to fight my bonds.

"He was still alive when we took our first bites."

"And he was a screamer." Then they both drew their knives over my forearms, piercing the maze of arteries and veins beneath the skin. I screamed and then tried to fight.

"Helia, the more you struggle, the faster you're gonna bleed out. So you might as well lie back and relax." Adam gave me a tip. I could hear my blood hit the bowls located on the floor.

"HEY!" Dean came bursting into the room and shot at one of them. I moaned, feeling woozy and seeing blackness on the edge of my vision.

"Dean. . . ghouls!" Sam's voice was floating now. "Come on!" He sounded slightly panicked. "Helia! Don't . . . close . . . me! Come . . . e on!"

"Alright, here we go." The bonds released me and Dean pulled me upright. "Jesus, Lia." I was dazed and swaying. Dean pressed something on my forearms. "Keep . . . on!" Then he got Sam undone and they were helping me out of the room.

When I awoke I was lying on a bed in a familiar black and blue room. I heaved a sigh of relief until I tried to push myself upright. The pain was overbearing and I let out a cry of pain as I collapsed back onto the bed. Within a few moments, the outer door opened and in walked Min Yoongi.

I let my eyes feast on the familiar sight of my boyfriend. The powerful aura surrounded him and I instantly felt just a little bit safer. He looked calm and collected, though I noted the dark circles underneath his eyes and his shirt was slightly wrinkled, as if he had slept in it.

"Helia, thank God you are awake." Yoongi spoke, his voice heavy with emotion. He strode across the room and sat on the side of the bed.

"Yoongi. Am I dreaming?" I asked, taking his hand. He let out a chuckle.

"No, darling. This is no dream." Yoongi raised his free right hand to brush the hair back from my face.

"What happened? How did I get here?" I asked, still confused.

"Your brothers brought you here. You were quite delirious and that angel, Castiel, couldn't stop some of the bleeding or heal you completely." Yoongi kissed me gently.

"Oh." I was getting tired. "Dean and Sam?"

"They will be back. Giving your brother a 'Hunter's Funeral'. They said you would understand." I nodded tiredly, and he noticed. "Sleep Lia. They will be back." He ran his hand through my hair and I felt my eyes drift close.

"Him Sam?" I heard my eldest brother argue.

"Dean, just be happy for our sister. Please?" Sam begged. I stirred a little and immediately all noise ceased in the room.

"Lia?" Dean asked. I opened my eyes and looked at my brothers.

"Dean? Sam?" I asked, my mind still a little groggy.

"We're here baby." Dean's voice was soft as it used to be when I was little and ill. I must have really scared them.

"What happened?" I asked, trying to sit up. Dean gently helped pull me into a sitting position, while Sam adjusted my pillows.

"Do you remember the ghouls?" Sam sat down on the bed. I nodded.

"Things kind of got a little blurry after they cut my arms." I admitted.

"Well, Dean ended up coming in - "

"Guns a blazing!" Dean butted in. Sam gave a faint smile.

"Of course, I forgot that little relevant piece of the story. Anyway I warned Dean that they were ghouls and he took care of them."

"Head shots!" Dean said cheerfully.

"Sounds gruesome." Yoongi's voice came from the doorway. I smiled, though Dean frowned, and Sam looked amused.

“You’re home.”

"Of course, I am Helia." Yoongi stepped into the room. "I'm only here for a few hours. Then I have to return for a meeting I have to have with the leader of South Africa."

"Oh, good!" I exclaimed. "You know my brothers, Sam and Dean?"

"Of course. We've made our acquaintances." Yoongi said quite stiffly. My eyes narrowed, and I had a feeling I missed something very important.

"Hmmmm." I pinned Dean with a stare, when he grimaced. "Well I'm glad you are all getting along."

"Well, I'm finding Yoongi's library very enlightening." Sam grinned, trying to diffuse the tension.

"Figured you would." I smirked at my little brother. "And did you happen to see the books I've been adding?"

"Yeah!" Sam nodded. "A couple of those are out of print and difficult to find."

"Nerds." Dean snorted, but settled back on the bed with a fond smile.

A week later I was feeling loads better. Dean and Sam both were back in the States. I was sitting in the study, reading the newspaper, when Yoongi walked in.

"Ah, Helia." Yoongi gave me a quick kiss before moving to sit at his desk. "How are you feeling?"

"Better. Still getting dizzy, but a lot better than a week ago." I said, fingering the gauze wrapped around my forearms. Yoongi had paid a doctor so he would come to the house as well as keep silent about the manner of the injuries. People would think they were self-inflicted, which was not the truth.

"Good. You are still pale, but that is to be expected. You have lost a substantial amount of blood." Yoongi said thoughtfully. "How would you feel if I took you out to dinner tomorrow?"

"That would be lovely." I said with a soft smile. Yoongi smiled back before he picked up the phone and placed his reservation at the Landmark tomorrow night at 8.

I was ready for our date by 7:00. I was wearing the black and purple dress I had chosen for our original date, almost twelve days ago. I only changed that I was going to wear a cropped, black silk blazer with it, only to cover the noticeable bandages.

Yoongi watched me descend the staircase. He was wearing a black suit and had both the undershirt as well as the handkerchief match my own outfit in purple. I smiled as I took in the sight of him and he stepped forward with two velvet boxes.

"I promised you I would chose the jewelry." I opened the longer box to expose a diamond choker necklace. He put it on then I opened the next box. A diamond bracelet. He as well, fastened that onto my wrist before pressing a kiss to the palm of my right hand.

"It is gorgeous, Yoongi. I don't deserve you." Tears were prickling the back of my eyes. Yoongi shushed me and pulled me into his arms.

"Hush my darling. Do not cry. You will only succeed in ruining your make-up." I laughed and pulled away from Yoongi. He smirked and grabbed my coat from Eva. He helped me into it before slipping on his own coat. Then he led me outside to the car.

"Gi?" I asked hesitantly as we sat in the midst of traffic. He turned towards me.

"What is it, my dear?" Yoongi asked warmly.

"Are you angry with me?" I blurted. He looked bemused.

"Why would I be angry?" Yoongi asked. "Is there a reason that I should be?"

"NO!" I said quickly. I didn't want him to think that I had cheated on him or something like that. "I just wondered if you were because of what happened these past weeks."

"Nonsense! None of what occurred was your fault at any rate." Yoongi hummed then as we pulled up in front of the Landmark. We walked in and the desk clerk took our jackets. "Min. Party of two."

"Right this way, sir." The hostess led us to a seat near a window. They left us with the wine list and I just looked at Yoongi, feeling lost.

"I'll order the wine darling." Yoongi said and when the waiter came back he told him. Saint-Emilion 2001 or something similar. "Helia, I was never mad at you."

"Oh?" I breathed as we continued the conversation from the car. "Somehow, it feels off."

"I know. I was angry when you left with Cas." Yoongi admitted. "Then worried when Bobby Singer had no idea where you were."

"Wait you called Bobby?" I asked incredulous. He nodded and took a sip of the wine he ordered.

"Yes. He is a very interesting person to say the least." Yoongi stated with a look of distaste on his face. I laughed and nodded.

"Yeah Uncle Bobby is definitely interesting." I agreed before taking a sip of the wine. It was divine.

"Then I was concerned when you appeared semi-conscious and blood soaked." Yoongi frowned. "I thought you were dead and that I would never have the opportunity to - "

"Are you ready to order?" A waiter interrupted us. I frowned at him.

"Yeah, dear, do you wish for an appetizer?" Yoongi blinked, frowning due to the interruption. I nodded.

"I'll start off with the broccoli soup."

"And I will have the Orkney Hand Dived Scallops." Yoongi said.

"And do you know the rest of your order?" The waiter asked, pad poised. "So that I might have everything ready when you are finished with the first course."

"Yes, that would be lovely." I smiled at the nervous boy. "I'll have the sirloin."

"And what two sides, madam?"

"The smoked garlic mash and the mustard glaze carrots."

"And for your main dish sir?" He asked Yoongi.

"The Cumbrian Lamb."

"And are you partaking in dessert?" He asked, still writing.

"Why not?" Yoongi exclaimed. I raised an eyebrow – he was always on a new diet.

"Alright." I agreed. "The Opera Gateau for me."

"And I'll take the Hot Blackberry Soufflé." The waiter took the menus and disappeared.

"So, what were you afraid you wouldn't get the opportunity to do?" I asked, sipping the red wine. Yoongi gave a slight quirk of his lips before leaning towards me.

"Helia Winchester, I have never been as close to a person before as I have been with you." Yoongi took a large drink of his wine. "I have never thought it possible to find someone I would be willing to tolerate before."

"Thanks Gi." I gave him a smile. Of course, you had to know Yoongi in order to fully understand his form of a compliment.

"What I'm asking, is if you Helia Winchester will do me the honor of joining me in matrimony?" Yoongi pulled a small velvet box from the confines of his suitcoat. He opened it and I gasped as the reality hit me.

"Yes, Min Yoongi, I will marry you and be forced to put up with you for the rest of our lives." I smirked at him and he slid the ring on my finger.

"Now you understand why I am partaking in dessert?" Yoongi said gravely. Oh how I wanted to hit him at that moment. My fiancée.

"Well, at least you proposed properly this time." I snapped back. He smiled as our appetizers came and we began to enjoy our meal. The beginning of a truly lovely night.

 

Chapter Text

A/N: I'm back! I have a few of these one-shots handwritten, I just need to type them out, as well as a few half-written on my computer. Never fear, I am on break, so I will be able to get these out now. . . .

 

 

“Jagiya, come play,” Yoongi asked, basketball in hand as the rest of BTS waited on the court. I sighed as I set my purse down.

“I don’t know,” my tone wasn’t convinced and Yoongi frowned.

“Please? Play with us,” Yoongi asked, and then the maknae line began their pouting.

“Noona, please!” Jimin begged.

“We’ll be uneven!” Jungkook shouted. “It won’t be fair to the hyungs if they lose.”

“Please, please, please, please?” Taehyung got onto his knees and begged, hands clasped in front of my eyes.

“Okay, enough!” I gave in after extensive whining and pleading. “But no one can complain when their team loses!”

“You aren’t giving yourself enough credit,” Jin said, totally overestimating my abilities.

“There is a reason I do not play sports Jin,” I sighed.

“That’s not true!” Hoseok interjected. “We all know that you play tennis.”

“True, but that’s different!” I tried to worm my way out of this travesty, but no one wanted to hear it. I sighed in defeat, but stepped onto the court after setting my possessions down.

“Thanks Jagi,” Yoongi grinned at me, gums on display. I just rolled my eyes.

“Don’t come crying to me when you see why I didn’t want to play in the first place,” I warned him, to which he huffed a laugh.

“Fair enough,” Yoongi pressed a kiss to my temple before dragging me to join the others.

“How are the teams going to be?” Namjoon asked.

“How about maknaes versus hyungs?” Jimin suggested.

“No!” Yoongi was quick to refute this suggestion. “Then Elle would be on your team.”

“Well she is younger than Namjoon-hyung,” Taehyung nodded. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

“We get Elle!” Jungkook cheered.

“Or we could play rock, paper, scissors,” I suggested trying to ease the tension. “It would leave the teams up to chance?”

“Not fair Noona,” Jungkook pouted, though if asked later he would deny such a suggestion. (I do not pout!).

“Yeah, you always stay neutral,” Jimin pouted, though he would state it was all part of his charm. And he would be correct. Everyone always concedes to Jimin since he uses his advantages correctly. Heaven forbid if he would pout at Yoongi, who would then drop everything he was doing in order to assist Jimin or give him what he wants.

“You don’t want to be on our team?” Taehyung was also trying to guilt trip me into agreeing on the hyungs versus maknaes. I was torn, not wanting any discord, and sent a look towards the hyung line as if for them to save me.

“Well, I for one, think that rock, paper, scissors is the most practical,” Namjoon interjected. “It means that Elle doesn’t have to pick a side, nor does she have to feel guilty for picking one over the other.”

“I concur,” Jin stated, wrapping an arm around me, while Yoongi did the same on my other side.

“You are no fun,” Taehyung whined, before we started on the Rock, paper, scissors game. The first four to lose were one team while the other was the other four.

First out was both Jungkook and Namjoon. Then followed Jimin. And finally to make up the team was Jin. I was left with Yoongi, Hoseok, and Taehyung.

“Are you ready?” Yoongi asked as everyone staked their claim to one end of the court. I nodded.

“Yes, but I wasn’t lying when I said I was abysmal at playing this game,” I informed my boyfriend who only smiled.

“It’ll be fine.”

 

Everything wasn’t fine. The guys soon learned that I may have been too optimistic with my portrayal of my abilities. After missing the hoop by a mile for the twentieth time, I nearly burst into tears at the new wave of laughter by everyone.

“I told you all I wasn’t good at this!” I whined, and Yoongi having dealt with my moods for years knew that I was nearly at my breaking point.

“Jagiya, it’s alright,” he soothed wrapping an arm around me and kissing the crown of my head. He shot glares at everyone and they all quieted down.

“Yoongi-hyung and noona kind of cancel each other out,” Jungkook said, amusement evident as he dribbled the errant basketball he brought back.

“Why don’t I help you?” Yoongi suggested. “Jungkook-ah, give me that basketball.”

The basketball was thrown to Yoongi who caught it with all the prowess of having almost been a star athlete for college. Perhaps even became a national player.

“Look,” Yoongi spun me around and hooked his head over my shoulder. “Feel the weight of the basketball, Jagi.”

“Uh-huh,” I muttered, still clueless over what was happening. Yoongi began to move my limbs into the right position before he used my arm to toss the ball into the net.

“There you go!” Yoongi cheered while the rest of the BTS guys did as well. I blushed, since their cheering was unwarranted. I didn’t make that basket, Yoongi did. I knew they were doing it to make me feel better, but it just reminded me how bad I sucked at sports.

We continued to mess around for a bit. Each time I would get the ball, Yoongi would be there, molding his body against mine while he guided me through the motions to score a basket. No one kept score after that, knowing that it wouldn’t matter anyway. The other side had won.

That evening while we were at home, I thanked Yoongi for his actions. He looked confused over my need to express my gratitude.

“You never have to thank me for things like that, Jagi,” Yoongi stated with a smile.

“Of course I do,” I said, looking down at the dish I was attempting to create. “You didn’t have to do that today.”

“I’m your boyfriend. Of course I would help you,” Yoongi’s answer was simple. Perhaps to him it was, but for years I had been teased and bullied for my lack of athleticism. Tennis was the only sport I was decent at, and that was in part to having a large racquet to hit a small item.

“Thank you for being my boyfriend,” I hugged him, abandoning the pan on the stove in favor of squishing the insides out of my boyfriend.

“I’ll always be here,” Yoongi whispered into my hair while we stood there for a bit. “But, um, jagi? I think your food is burning.”

Chapter Text

A/N: okay, okay. I know it isn't Halloween, I am just inspired. So bear with me, alright?

 

Halloween was a time I adored, due to my Celtic ancestry. My boyfriend and his friends were all having a party, thankful for their hiatus. The only thing that was demanded of me, was to show up in a costume. I laughed as I spent hours of my time on the internet trying to find the perfect costume.

I didn’t let Jimin see what I was purchasing. That would be half of the fun when I showed up on Friday night in the outfit. Of course, Jimin pouted the entire time, threatening to open the package when it arrived on Thursday.

I knew his schedule, and knew that there was no way he would be here – his hiatus didn’t start until Friday afternoon. So I let him rant the entire time about how unfair it was for me to keep secrets from him. He also tried to throw in the matching argument, but I didn’t fold to his whining. I just smiled and ordered the costume when he was in the shower.

When Thursday came, I opened the box and tried on the costume. I wanted to make sure it fit properly, and managed to hide it right before the door opened. Jimin of course tore the apartment apart, looking for the costume, which much to my amusement was hidden in his mound of clothing.

I always hid items in his stuff; he never looked in his own belongings. It was hilarious to watch him run around and snoop through my own stuff. I just let him continue to do so, and focused on my own stuff, which was mainly putting items back in their spots.

When Friday came, I exiled Jimin. I told him to get ready at the dorm, and that if I caught sight of him in our apartment he would be sleeping on the couch or at the dorms for the next month. Jimin whined like a kicked puppy but left. I knew that threat would be enough to keep his curiosity at bay.

Then I got ready after thirty minutes to ensure that he wouldn’t barge into the apartment claiming his forgot an item. I pulled out the purple satin costume and slipped it onto my body after pulling on a pair of underwear and a strapless bra. Thankfully the zipper was on the side, so it was easy to encase myself into the fabric.

I did my makeup, focusing on a natural look with bold eyes and lips. Then I pulled my hair back into a braid which wrapped into a bun.

https://hairstylemonkey.co.in/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/greek-goddess-braided-updo.jpg

The next part of my costume came with the shoes – black heels, and black beads for accessories. Then I was ready to go to the party. I grabbed an overcoat and my purse. I checked the time and found that I had forty minutes to get there. Taking the bus would put me about five minutes early, but there may be traffic. So I left, and got onto the bus, listening to music for the duration of the ride. And responding to Taehyung’s text messages about how Jimin was being his usual self, impatient about my outfit and when I would arrive.

I made it to the dormitory without any mishaps. I did have to snap at an older gentleman who kept trying to sneak a hand into my peacoat. I kept checking behind me, wondering if he would follow me, and in turn ran directly into Yoongi.

“Whoa!” Yoongi grabbed a hold of my arms before I could tumble backwards. I groaned in embarrassment.

“Yoongi-oppa I am so sorry!” I apologized to the Daegu rapper who only smiled in amusement.

“Something keep your attention?” He asked, picking up the bag that he dropped after I plowed into him.

“Yeah, a creep on the bus,” I muttered. Yoongi stiffened before checking our surroundings. After ensuring that we were alone, he wrapped an arm around my waist and steered me towards their dorm. “Oppa!” I tried to protest, but he wouldn’t budge.

That was the thing about Yoongi. Everyone thought he was cold and unemotional, but when he was with someone he cared about, Yoongi was the most protective. Even if it came in small gestures, or like now, escorting me into the dorms to ensure my safety, it portrayed his love.

“Leigh!” Taehyung threw open the dorm door and practically dragged me away from Yoongi who grunted and took the bags into the kitchen.

“Jagi!” Jimin’s voice was loud as he ran around the corner of the hall. “I’ve missed you!”

I sighed at their theatrics before walking towards the living room. Taehyung and Jimin began to protest since I didn’t take off the coat. I raised an eyebrow before walking into the living room where Jin had set up a table of drinks and snacks.

Jimin was dressed like a police officer, Jungkook was dressed like some anime character along with Taehyung, Namjoon was dressed like a college professor, J-Hope went all out and dressed like a Roman gladiator, Jin was dressed like a mobster, and Yoongi was dressed like a pilot.

I waited until everyone was assembled in the living room before announcing that I would take my coat off. I teased them all, by sauntering into the hallway to take off the coat and hang it up on the coat rack. I took my time hanging up the jacket and then came into their viewpoint sans coat.

http://img.costumecraze.com/images/vendors/rubies/889354-Sexy-Heavenly-Body-Fairy-Costume-large.jpg

“Holy shit!” Jungkook yelped as he caught sight of me. Jimin scowled and slapped his dongsaeng in the back of the head.

“Language!” Jin scolded but smiled at my ensemble.

“You look beautiful,” Hoseok smiled at me as I took a seat on the chair.

“Thanks!” I smiled, and Jimin groaned.

“Why didn’t you tell me? I should have been Peter Pan!” We all laughed at Jimin’s frustration. It was a nice night, full of laughter, eating, and watching movies to scare Hoseok. And myself.

Chapter Text

A/N: Sorry about the long wait for new content. I've been really in a bad place - writing these on paper, but never typing them into the computer. I also have a desktop littered with half-finished work, as well as attempting to work on three different pieces myself for contests and publication.

 

 

“Baby, wait!” I huffed and t urned to see Jungkook following me. “It’s not what you think!”

“It’s not what I think?” I repeated incredulous that he would even attempt to do this cliché part. Why couldn’t he have let us both leave this mess with what dignity we have left?

“Yes,” his voice belied his stoic face. The desperation was oozing from his voice, the voice that usually brought other companies to their knees.

“What it looks like to me is that a certain husband forgot about his own anniversary and then showed up with a whore.”

“It was just - ”

“Shut up. I don’t care anymore Jungkook,” I retorted lying through my teeth. “What I do care about is our three-year-old daughter, who night after night asks me the same thing – when is daddy coming home? And I have to lie and make up excuses about why you can’t be bothered with the family you have at home. About why you are so busy you can’t take thirty minutes to read her a bedtime story, tuck her in, or god forbid check for monsters! Why you don’t come to her dance recitals! And now, I find you making time for a whore Jungkook!” I shouted, temper flaring.

“Honey, we can work his out!” Jungkook pleaded, but I just shook my head.

“Not this time, we cannot. I’m going to see a lawyer,” I informed him. “Don’t bother following me home.”

With that I left, my heels clacking against the concrete. I got into my car, leaving behind a broken marriage. Something that hurt worse than any other pain I had endured. Of course, I had my doubts for months but they were never reaffirmed. To see him so happy hurt the most, since my mind went through everything that could have been the cause of his cheating.

That night, after bidding the babysitter – a college student named Taehyung – a good night and providing payment, I agonized for hours. I drove myself crazy with the what-ifs,  until I started my search for lawyers. Taehyung was kind enough to come over on short notice, to watch our daughter while I visited a law office for a consult.

 

BTS

I stood in front of the law offices of Jung and Kim. After my early morning research I found these lawyers who were supposed to be ranked amongst the top. I managed to book a consult with lawyer Jung at 10:40 AM, out of sheer good luck.

The receptionist seated me in his office about five minutes before my scheduled appointment time. She left with a quick “He’ll be here soon” and shut the door. I was left to my own devices, which meant that I glanced around, noticing a lack of personal objects such as photos. However, the room was painted a bright yellow. It reflected a bright personality, as well as an organized person. Nothing seemed out of place and there was no dust gathering on any surface.

“Sorry I’m late!” A guy tumbled through the door, cup of coffee in hand. He had a million watt smile on his face and light brown hair.

“It’s fine,” I stood up as he walked in and set the cup on his desk.

“Please sit, Mrs. Jeon,” the lawyer insisted. I nodded and sank back down onto the leather seat. “My name is Jung Hoseok. I see you are here for a consultation?”

“Yes, Lawyer Jung,” I replied, twisting my hands in ill-concealed anxiety.

“How can I help you today?” He asked, leaning forward, hands clasped together, giving me his undivided attention. I took in a deep breath.

“I’m here to file for a divorce, Lawyer Jung,” I started.

“Oh, I’m really sorry,” he said, face showing his emotion.

“Thank you,” I gave a weak smile.

“May I ask on what grounds?”

“Adultery. I caught my husband with another woman,” I sighed. “I’ve had suspicions, but nothing was ever concrete. Last night was our five year anniversary. I sat at our reserved table for over forty-five minutes when I saw a couple sitting together. I remembered the memories that my husband and I shared when we were on dates and looked happy together. That’s when I noticed the man’s familiar facial structure. It was my husband.”

“I’m sorry you had to experience that,” Lawyer Jung was very empathetic. He offered me a box of tissues seeing the tears forming in my eyes.

“It’s not your fault,” I whispered. “I think the hardest thing about this whole scenario is our daughter. For months, I’ve made excuses about his behavior, thinking he was just working hard. I did have doubts, but to know is like a punch to my gut.”

“I can’t imagine the pain and anguish you’ve experienced due to this,” Lawyer Jung sat back in his chair. “You have a good case though.”

“Can you help me with filing the appropriate forms?” I asked him with hopeful eyes.

“Of course,” his voice was gentle as were his eyes. At this moment, I wished I had met Lawyer Jung first, but tore myself away from those thoughts. “Of course we would have to settle with your husband, including child support, alimony, assets, etc. As long as they agree, it won’t drag out.”

“Of course,” I sighed, knowing that Jungkook’s family would put up a huge fight.

“May I ask who is your husband? So my team and I can reach out to his lawyer as well as draw up the forms regarding his finances.”

“My husband is Jeon Jungkook,” I met the surprised eyes of Lawyer Jung. He was just now realizing what he was stepping in to.

“Okay,” was all he stated after a terse silence. I, myself, was shocked at his reaction to this news.

“You’ll still help me?” I asked him as he looked up from the notes he was writing.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I?” Lawyer Jung looked shocked I would ask such a question. “Whoever your husband is, has no relevance to the divorce or my willingness to assist you. You’ve been wronged, and I will help.”

“Thank you so much! You have no idea how much this means to me,” I was grateful to this man, knowing that other lawyers would have walked away.

“No worries Mrs. Jeon. I’m just doing my job,” Lawyer Jung stated. “What I need to do right now is gather the information needed to draw up the divorce papers. I’ll call you in a few days, so we can go over the information.”

“Thank you, Lawyer Jung. I appreciate your assistance,” I bowed to the lawyer who walked me out after gathering my information. I left the law offices, feeling lighter than I had in a while. My mood wasn’t to last, however, diminishing into anger and despair seeing my in-laws along with Jungkook sitting in our apartment.

BTS

“What is this?” Kim Namjoon dropped a pile of papers onto his partners desk. Jung Hoseok looked over at the paperwork recognizing the forms he had submitted the night before.

“Divorce papers Joonie. Have you lost your eyesight along with your gracefulness?” Hoseok joked, smile wide as he pored over the Jeon family assets. The real assets, not just the ones that they provide to the public.

“No, I have not,” Namjoon disagreed. “What I meant is – Jeon Jungkook?”

“Yes and?” Hoseok raised an eyebrow, unimpressed at his friends hesitance.

“The son of CEO Jeon Junghyuk?”

“The very same,” Hoseok confirmed. “I’m drawing up the settlement now. Turns out the Jeon’s never signed a pre-nup.”

“Hoseok we can’t - ”

“Why can’t we?” Hoseok’s pen stopped writing as he stared up at his best friend and law partner.

“You know as well as I do what is going to happen,” he sighed.

“Then he shouldn’t have been careless,” Hoseok’s tone indicated how upset he was over this whole ordeal. He remembered his own childhood and how his father cheated on his mother. “Or better yet, not cheat in the first place.”

“Hoseok-ah I understand why you want to help, but please think of the consequences,” Namjoon pleaded.

“Why don’t you tell that to the female who sat down across from me, so riddled with anxiety and sadness over her broken marriage? How she didn’t want to believe that her husband was cheating on her, so she made thousands of excuses for his behavior. Not only to herself, but to their daughter, all the while he can make time for another woman.”

“We could end up losing everything,” Namjoon said.

“Or winning,” Hoseok grinned, holding up a flashdrive. “As I said, their heir shouldn’t have been so careless. Adultery is a punishable offense, and I have the proof.”

 

BTS

 

It had been a rough week. I was a nervous wreck as the entire family stated at our penthouse. I couldn’t eat or sleep – even if Jungkook slept on our bedroom couch. His mother always found something to criticize about me, his father not bothering to hide his disdain regarding his son’s foreign wife.

Taehyung stayed away, having faced the wrath of Jeon HyeNa. She had choice words about me abandoning my child to a babysitter. Even though our marriage was rocky, Jungkook said nothing in my defense with every insult his parents threw my way. I was left to flounder on my own, sinking into the dark, cold water of my mind. Each day was becoming more and more difficult not to just let myself drown in my despair.

“Excuse me,”” I whispered, hearing my phone ring while we were eating dinner. I didn’t bother waiting for a response, just fled, hearing the barbs from my mother-in-law cutting into the taut skin of my bony back. “Hello?”

“Mrs. Jeon,” Lawyer Jung was the caller.

“Yes,” I slipped on a pair of shoes and went out the door.

“How are you?” He sounded concerned, which is something I hadn’t experienced in days. I think I was justified to burst into tears on my way down the building stairs. “Mrs. Jeon? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Lawyer Jung,” I composed myself enough to answer him after about five minutes of heart wrenching sobs. “It’s been a long week, though.”

“I’m sorry you’ve had a tough week,” he sounded like he cared. I was surprised at the compassion he had for one client. “I just called to inform you that the papers have been drawn up. I just need your signature so we can send them over to your husband.”

“Lawyer Jung, I don’t know if I can,” I said trying to rush to get out the words. “Can I talk this over with you? Tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Come anytime,” his voice was gentle and soothing. “It will be okay, alright?”

“Thanks,” I hung up the phone with shaking fingers. I wiped at the wetness hiding underneath my swollen and tired eyes before I entered the warzone once more. My stomach was in knots as I removed the pair of shoes.

“I apologize for my abrupt departure,” I bowed to my in-laws before cleaning the table. Jungkook said nothing about my full plate nor commented when I came to bed at 2 in the morning, after cleaning the entire apartment once more since Mrs. Jeon found fault in everything.

 

BTS

 

The next day I managed to leave the penthouse apartment. Of course it was met with snide comments from the Jeons as they kept discussing how unfit of a mother I am. My shaking was more prominent today, noticed only when I tried to hand my ID to the secretary.

“Ma’am are you okay?” I nodded my head as I took back the ID and then we walked towards Lawyer Jung’s office.

“Sir, she’s here,” the secretary announced before allowing me entry. I halted seeing another man in the room. This man had feline-like features, an aura that would cow any man, yet a delicate physique.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t know you were otherwise engaged,” I flinched back, shoulders folding in on myself.

“No, no! This is Yoongi-hyung. He’s a friend,” Jung was quick to jump to his feet. “Come sit.”

“You look terrible,” Yoongi frowned as I sat in the chair.

“Hyung!” Lawyer Jung admonished.

“No, it’s fine. He’s right. I can’t sleep or eat,” I admitted. “My hands won’t quit shaking either.”

“What’s wrong?” Lawyer Jung perched on the desk in front of my chair.

“The Jeons have moved in,” I whispered. “Jungkook told them and now they’ve taken over our apartment.”

“Intimidation,” Yoongi hissed, eyes narrowing. “I hoped they wouldn’t try to pull a stunt like this.”

“Mrs. Jeon - ”

“No! Don’t call me that. My name is Solemn Ellis-Jeon,” I interrupted him, hating that title more than ever. “Mrs. Jeon is my mother-in-law.”

“Okay. Solemn-ssi,” Lawyer Jung started. “I called Yoongi-hyung here because I was concerned about you last night.”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, hanging my head.

“No, don’t be,” Lawyer Jung disagreed. “He is one of Korea’s top investigators. My partner and I had an extensive talk a few days ago. One of the points we were worried about was the tactics that the Jeon’s might use.”

“But why?” I asked, eyes betraying my pain and anguish.

“The Jeons have always been in control,” Yoongi-ssi stated.

“But the real reason would be that you never signed a prenup,” Jung stated, a smug smile on his face.

“And this means?”

“You have the opportunity to take half of everything Jeon Jungkook has and will have,” Lawyer Jung stated. “Plus this publicity - ”

“Would be social suicide for the Jeons,” Yoongi commented. “Their public image would be tarnished. Korea’s heartthrob cheating on his wife, who bore him a child? Korea’s sympathy would be on the young foreign wife and his daughter.”

“Yes,” Lawyer Jung agreed. “Do you want to proceed or stay with Jeon Jungkook?”

“If I decide to proceed?”

“All you need to do is sign the paperwork. Yoongi-hyung’s partner will take them to Jeon Jungkook’s office. Yoongi and I would accompany you back to the apartment so you can pack,” Lawyer Jung recited the plan.

“What about Hyeona?”

“Temporary custody always goes to the mother,” Yoongi announced.

“Where will we go?” I asked, still intimidated by the Jeons.

“To my place,” Lawyer Jung spoke up. “You would be the safest there. Yoongi-hyung lives across the hall.”

“Okay,” I nodded. “Thank you,” I said as I looked over the papers I needed to sign.

“No need to thank us, Solemn-ssi,” Yoongi’s gravelly voice stated.

When the papers were signed and sealed into an envelope, Lawyer Jung called for a Park Jimin. This man was of the same height as Yoongi, but with more muscles. His smile brightened the room along with his red hair.

“Fighting!” He told me, before nodding to his hyungs. The three of us left, thereafter wanting to ensure Jungkook got the paperwork at the same time we reached the penthouse. That way the Jeon’s couldn’t lock me out of the apartment or run off with Hyeona.

“Are you ready?” Yoongi asked as I nodded. I punched in the code for the elevator and scanned the card.

“There you are! Honestly you are such a disgrace to the Jeon name! Being out - ” Mrs. Jeon stopped when she saw the two men accompanying me. “And accusing my son of cheating? You have some nerve to bring two men here!”

“Mrs. Jeon, I advise that you leave my client alone,” Lawyer Jung stepped in, cutting off the emotional tirade and berating. “Solemn-ssi go.”

“Yes,” I left and began to pack my things. Mostly essentials such as electronics, books, and some of my jewelry. When I was done I went to Hyeona’s room and packed her essentials too, before joining the men in the living room.

“All packed?” Yoongi asked. I nodded, and he moved to collect the luggage.

“Come on Hyeona,” I called to my daughter who came over to me. I picked her up just as Mrs. Jeon started to throw a fit.

“No,” Yoongi said, voice colder than his eyes as he looked at Mrs. Jeon. She was spewing such ugly words as well as shouting, that he stepped in. “My name in Min Yoongi – Chief Detective of Korea’s National Investigative Department.”

Mrs. Jeon stepped back once she realized just what and who my new ‘friend’ was. I, myself, was shocked, but managed to keep my thoughts under wraps. It wouldn’t due for her to know that I was surprised by that knowledge myself.

“Very well,” was all Mrs. Jeon stated, backing up in realization at the new implications of the divorce. Like something out of a comedy, my husband rushed into the apartment, eyes wild.

“Jungkook, please refrain,” his mother said, tone tired, as his mouth opened. He looked socked as we all left the apartment. We settled into the lawyer’s apartment.

“Call me Hoseok,” he grinned before disappearing.

 

BTS

 

The Jeons settled outside of court. When they found out Hoseok had evidence of their heirs transgressions, they were silent as they settled. The settlement included Jeon Jungkook paying for healthcare, buying an apartment, school fees, childcare allowance, along with alimony. He agreed to biweekly visits – Hyeona would stay with him every other weekend, and we would both discuss holidays.

After that ordeal, I found myself closer to Hoseok, Jimin, Namjoon, and Yoongi. Taehyung remained as our babysitter throughout the rest of his college days. His brother Seokjin, a Michelin chef would cook for us, which is how he met Namjoon. They clicked – it was almost instanteous.

“Sorry, we’re late!” I apologized rushing into the café with Hyeona. I was meeting Yoongi, Hoseok, Jimin, and Seokjin.

“Not at all!” Seokjin smiled as I settled Hyeona into the seat.

“How have you all been?” I was grateful to whoever decided to order for us already. Hyeona had a hot chocolate and a blueberry muffin. I had a dark roast mocha with a small pastry.

“Good,” Namjoon replied.

“Yoongi-hyung and I just finished a case,” Jimin chirped.

“I will be abducting this princess – she needs to taste test for her Uncle Jin!” Seokjin cooed, pinching her cheeks.

“Just easy ccases,” Hoseok sighed, sipping his Americano. “And you?”

“It’s been insane. My publisher is sorting my book signing dates, readings, and fan meets,” I sighed. “All the while, the publisher wants a sequel.”

“How is that going?” Namjoon asked.

“Touch, but I’m getting there. About halfway through,” I smiled. Hoseok grinned and grabbed my hand under the table.

Everything was as it should be – Jeon Jungkook was remarried and trying to be a better husband. I was able to write books that became a national as well as international bestsellers. Hoseok and Namjoon were still partners, but now billionaires due to their successes. Jimin and Yoongi were being promoted to instructors at the academy for future agents. Seokjin was a renowned chef. And Taehyung opened this café – the same one in which Hoseok asked me out on our first date two years ago and proposed seven months ago.

Chapter Text

A/N: Sorry for the long updates on all of my works. I've been really busy with my promotion, which has been really draining mentally. Tons of verbal abuse, which has done little for my mental state. I hope you all enjoy, and just know that this is a figment of my imagination.

 

Your parents had been furious at you, when ten years ago following your graduation from university, you ended up married. Married to a man who was 4 years your senior, and also the CEO of one of the largest tech companies in the world. You moved to South Korea – the country in which he originated and his business was located.

You didn’t work, just kept the house tidy and wrote during your spare time. It was nice, to be able to fill page after page with your mind’s creations. Not that they would be published – they just continued to stack up in boxes throughout your office.

Hoseok came home every night around 6 or 7, where he would have dinner waiting on him. It was a normal marriage, between two individuals who tied themselves together to portray their love. You attended functions with your husband, making nice with his close friends, also business partners. You went to exotic places on vacations. Often times you felt lonely, but Hoseok made up for it with cute texts, notes, and surprise flowers.

Until the day the romance and feelings started to end. Not on your side, but Hoseok. He would come home later and later, often smelling like sweet perfume. You could see when he would read your messages, but chose not to reply. When he started to pull away from you intimately, no matter what you did.

It hurt, you thought, as your inspiration slowly drained from your mind. When the hours would pass in the blink of an eye, without a single word bleeding onto the crisp white pages. When the gifts stopped arriving at random periods and Hoseok’s friends would hush their conversations whenever you saw them.

You found yourself nursing broken promises and anxiety attacks. You stopped eating, the food sitting heavily in your stomach as you stared at the empty spot your husband used to occupy. His bright smile as he complimented the meal and his laughter as he talked about his day, inquiring about yours with intrigue in his eyes. The way he used to care about your chattering regarding the manuscripts you wrote, urging you to find a publisher.

The sear of heat as his hands caressed your pale flesh, worshipping you as a woman. The way his mouth drank your breath and moans as you kissed, whether it be gentle or rough. The warmth of his body as you both lie beneath the softest sheets, made from the finest cotton and highest thread count. You would curl into him, head pillowed upon his chest finding comfort in his heartbeat and he would write words of love on your naked back.

That was all over, you thought, as you looked at yourself in the mirror. Seeing the shell of the woman you had become. How hollow and gaunt your cheeks were, how lifeless and dull your hair. Your bones were jutting out of the pale flesh, barely housing them as they ached for the open air. Eyes, reddened and swollen from all the tears spent on the marriage that couldn’t last.

You pictured your husband with another woman. A woman ten times more beautiful than you would ever dream to be, with beautiful, shiny blonde hair cascading down her back. Pale skin unblemished by any acne, full lips the color of rubies. She would wear only the best designer clothing money could buy, with hands unmarred from longs days at work. No ink splotches or callouses.

You wondered what you could do to make yourself better in the eyes of your husband. Was it your inexperience? Your shape? You would get plastic surgery, go to the gym, or even visit the spa every day if it made you more desirable.

 

It was a rare night when Hoseok was home for dinner, but the silence was unbearable. You still made dinner every night, ready at 7 when he used to walk in the door. There was no chattering about any of the days topics, inquiries about what I had done, nor insights into his day. He didn’t even meet my eyes as he sat down to the homecooked meal.

You tried to choke down another bite of the vegetables but found your stomach roiling and protesting the few bites you managed to eat. Fork twirling through the food, you decided to ask him.

“What is so wrong about me?”

“Huh?” Hoseok muttered, confusion lacing his words.

“I can change, I promise,” you begged, sounding pathetic to your own ears.  

“Change what?”

“Whatever it is that you find undesirable,” you muttered, tears pooling already. You thought you didn’t have anything left for him to give.

“I don’t find you undesirable,” Hoseok said after a breath, a beat of silence.

“Please, don’t insult me Hoseok. I know I’m not good enough any longer,” you managed, lips trembling like your hands.

“That’s not true,” Hoseok denied.

“Then why?” You asked, wanting to know. “Why do you have her?”

“Her?” He tried to get around it, but the dam had broken. Too much had shifted, leaving the gaping wound exposed and pus festering at the surface.

“Please, Hoseok,” you begged, laughing internally at your pleading. Who would have thought that the tough as nails woman would be pleading with her lover, sounding like a dying woman.

“I’m sorry,” he stated. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” your lips quirked up into a smile. “We can get through this. I’ll work harder to be what you want. I promise.”

“God,” Hoseok’s chair crashed to the floor as he stood up. You jumped, startled and frightened at the sound. “Don’t you get it? I don’t love you any longer.”

“You – you – you don’t love me?” Now came the steady monsoon of tears, the shattering of your heart. You had known it to be true, but you didn’t want to hear the words. You had false hopes of this being okay, of him breaking it off with whoever and returning to you.

“I don’t,” Hoseok said, voice calmer as he took in your state. “I’m sorry. I should have told you this months ago.”

“Please, Hoseok,” you pleaded, body wracking with sobs as you held out a hand to him. “I love you. Come home. We can fix this!”

“We can’t fix this, not this,” Hoseok denied, moving away from you. “I’m sorry. Yoongi and Jimin will be here tomorrow.”

“Hoseok, please!” You wailed, tears falling hot and thick as he left your home, left you broken in a heap on the dining room floor. You felt like your whole body was shutting down, nothing was left for you any longer.

 

After an hour you managed to make it to your bed, where you curled up, breathing in his faint scent on the pillow. Your tears were depleted, throat sore with heaving and crying. Hoseok had taken all of what you were, extinguished your bright flame, you realized. And you were positive that you didn’t mind. You would give it all to him.

Numb and exhausted you walked over to the bathroom, where you stared at yourself for the longest time. You realized with a jolt how much you hated yourself. A fist went through the reflective surface, before you opened the door and gazed at the orange bottles. Triazolem was the bottle you chose, before shuffling to your office.

You sat and wrote. Wrote despite the blood covering your dominant hand, despite the sting of the wounds tugging at each word you wrote. You wrote in a fever, rushed and beautiful needing to get those words immortalized forever. You set down the pen at 7:47 AM before grabbing a sheet of your stationary. You pile the paper together, wrapping a ribbon around the thick manuscript and tying it into a perfect bow.  You quickly scribble a note, fold it and tuck it behind the bow after writing a name onto the page.

In a numb stupor, you make the trek to the dining room, where the meal had gone cold, half eaten. You pick up Hoseok’s chair, hands stroking the back of the polished wood, placing the manuscript in his spot. You give your home one last glance over before taking the bottle out of your pocket.

All twenty-three of the pills went into your stomach, followed by a glass of water. You knew it wouldn’t take long, as you sat on the sofa, a picture of you and your husband in your hands. You loved the way you both were in love at the time. You lay on your side, hands curled around the picture, watching the black begin to appear throughout your sight. You waited for the welcoming darkness to envelop you in the warmth and it did.

 

 

Jimin and Yoongi were muttering together, wondering how Hoseok could have been so stupid. He should have called one of them to come over, to watch over his soon-to-be ex-wife, not left her along when she was mentally unstable. They put the key into the lock, heard the click, and pushed the door open.

The house was too quiet, and their skin prickled as their bodies were overcome with unease. Yoongi stepped into the house first, kicking off his Italian leather shoes, before calling out a quiet greeting. Jimin followed suit and they went into the dining room where the remnants of dinner awaited them. Jimin noticed the bundle, beautifully bound on one side of the table. He picked it up to see – My Darling Hoseok – written in beautiful script.

“Jesus Christ,” Yoongi breathed, face going pale as he caught onto significance of this item. He ducked into the living room to find the beautiful Y/N Jung laying on the couch. Her lips were pale, tinged with blue and she wasn’t breathing any longer. She looked like an angel even in death, even in gory death with the lack of bodily functions.

“Jimin!” Yoongi screamed, tears falling down his face as he fell beside the beautiful woman.

“Hyung?” Jimin asked, gasping when he caught sight of the scene.

“Call an ambulance. Then contact Hoseok,” Yoongi had enough cognitive ability to remain calm and give out the orders while Jimin was shaking contacting the authorities. Then he contacted Hoseok and informed him of the news.

 

Hoseok paid to have her put to rest in a cemetery near her parent’s. He knew they would want to visit her. The manuscript and note remained unopened, locked into his filing cabinet. He felt guilt every time he kissed his wife and held his children, knowing that he failed during his first marriage.

Twelve years after her death, on the anniversary of the day, he took the manuscript and note and went to a park. With shaking hands he pulled the note out first, reading over her sweet words. His first love – he felt his heart warming as he cried at her admissions. Then he pulled the bow and started to read her manuscript.

That night he wrote to Namjoon, his friend, who was willing to print her manuscript. All the money went to her family and Namjoon’s company kept receiving letters and notes from fans asking for more. Asking for more material from their favorite author. Hoseok had boxes after boxes of her manuscripts, which were put into print, posthumously.

Chapter Text

“Jade you promised!” My little sister whined as I got dressed for my next fight.

“What?” I asked her, hiding my outfit with the robe. I didn’t want her to know that I was fighting again just so that I could put food on the table.

I had recently lost my job and fighting provided me with a chance at more money than I would make in a month. So I went back to the illegal fight rings that were notorious in our area.

“You promised that you would buy me tickets to go see BTS!” She whined coming around the corner. I pursed my lips at her as I thought it over.

I had promised her, but that was before I lost my job. I thought about the money I had saved and realized that if this would make her happy I would do it for her.

“You know what?” I said to her with a thoughtful look on my face.

“What?” She asked, being cautious not to get her hopes up.

“Why don’t you go get my purse. I’ll buy us tickets now,” I smiled at her. She grinned and screamed before rushing off to grab my purse. I laughed as she came rushing back and I handed her the card before she ran off to plug in the numbers to TicketMaster.

“When’s the show?” I asked her.

“October 2nd. Chicago,” she replied.

“Okay. I’ll clear my schedule,” I spoke before I got ready. “I’ll be back late tonight. Do your homework, lock the doors.” I kissed her head as I left the house with my outfit covered by a baggy pair of sweats and a sweatshirt.

That night I was in the ring – I fought three fights and received 30k – which after the cuts that were taken, I would receive about half. My head was spinning from a particularly hard knock that I had taken, but I didn’t mind. It meant that we could live comfortably for the next few weeks.

I had to fight again right before the concert that Raine had gotten tickets to. Literally like just a few hours before. Now Raine was panicking because my eye was black and blue, and I had a split lip.
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“Jade I got us back stage passes!” She yelled while we were in the car. I sighed.

“I’m sorry, baby,” I apologized to my sister.

“You promised me! You promised me that you wouldn’t do this anymore!” She yelled as we parked the car.

“I have to Raine!” I shouted back at her, sick and tired of her yelling at me for something that was beyond my control. We had started to walk and never realized that we had stopped right beside a large trailer – that was, you guessed it, filled with the members of BTS!

“You don’t have to!” She shouted back, her face blotchy and red from tears.

“If I don’t, we both starve to death Raine!” I screamed.

“What if you die huh?” She demanded. “What if one of these days they call me to tell me that you died?”

“Don’t be so overdramatic!” I pulled my hands through my hair.

“I’m not being overdramatic!” She screamed back at me. “Have you taken a look at yourself in the mirror?”

“I won, didn’t I?” I didn’t honestly see what the big deal was.

“Just because you won doesn’t make it right!” She yelled back at me. “I don’t want to see my sister beaten up like this.”

“Well I don’t really have a choice now do I?” I shouted back before sinking to my knees on the pavement.

“What do you mean?”

“They fired me at the office. So instead of starving, I decided to go back and do the thing that I am good at. I make way more money that way,” I explained, and she started to cry.

“I’m so sorry Jade. I had no idea,” she hugged me, and I hugged her back. It was like a sappy movie.

“It’s okay, baby,” I muttered into her hair. “Why don’t we just go, enjoy the concert, and have fun, okay?”

“Okay,” Raine agreed as we got to our feet and then walked into the venue.

She enjoyed the concert. So, did I, especially Fake Love and Idol. I felt like the blonde-haired boy was pointing at me throughout the song, but I couldn’t be sure.

“Come on!” Raine pulled me with her to where the crowd was forming for those lucky people who got to go backstage.

There were probably fifty girls there, all scrambling to meet with BTS. I just stayed close to Raine, and didn’t get to a part of the mob, which was a relief.

“Ah man,” she complained after the fact. “I didn’t get Yoongi’s signature!”

“Aw honey,” I ruffled her hair, muffling my pained gasp as she wrapped an arm around my waist. “There will always be another one.”

“I love you so much!” She giggled as she turned to hug me tightly. I gasped and nearly fell to the ground.

“Someone help!” My sister screamed as my knees connected with the arena floor. In a matter of minutes there was a security guard there who scooped me off the floor and carried me back through a labyrinth of dark corridors.

“You’re going to be alright,” my sister tried to soothe as she trotted along beside us to keep up. I closed my eyes for a few moments and then I felt my body being laid down on a leather couch.

I groaned as the pain reverberated through my body. The sounds in the room stopped as a hand was pressed to my forehead.

“She’s so rough and beat up,” Raine whimpered as a hand moved to lift my corset-like top. I slapped it away.

“I’ll be fine,” I groaned and moved to stand up, for a hand to push me back down.

“You collapsed in the arena. You aren’t fine,” Raine argued.

“Ma’am we need to check you over,” I looked up to see the seven members of BTS surrounded by huge guys, that I thought were probably their body guards, and two people in uniform. 4
“I’m fine,” I tried to reassure them all, but Raine shook her head.

“She fights,” she told them and the two in uniform exchanged glances.

“She could have internal - ”

“I don’t,” I interjected. “I do know how to check for that. I had it once.”

“What?” Raine looked stricken.

“Yeah, I don’t have internal bleeding at all. I cracked a few ribs. That’s all,” I lifted up my shirt for them to see the bruised ribs. “It’s fine. I just need to tape them, and I’ll be good to go for the next few weeks until it all heals.”

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“Ma’am this is extremely dangerous,” the female paramedic tried to tell me, but I just rolled my eyes.

“Everything is all good,” I sighed as I got to my feet finally. I fixed the brown leather shorts that had gotten messed up as well as the light brown colored corset-like top. I stumbled on my heels and a pale hand steadied me.

“Thank you,” I had to look up, even with my heels and smiled at the vocalist that I was convinced had been trying to catch my attention all night.

“It’s not a problem,” my eyes trailed up his arm and noticed the smile that graced his face. “I’m Jin.”

“Jade and this is my little sister Raine,” I said to him with a grin. “Oh! You said you needed one more signature, didn’t you?”

“Sis!” Raine’s cheeks blushed. I inwardly cooed. I knew that my barely teenaged sister had a crush on the short rapper.

“What?” I asked with a wink. “How do you know that this wasn’t my evil plan all along? Just pretend to collapse so you can get that last signature?”

“You are awful!” She covered her reddening face with her hands.

“Not what you were saying when I bought you the tickets!” I playfully poked the side of her torso and she jumped before sticking out her tongue.

“I hate you!”

“Wow. I’ll have to get you cool things more often.” I frowned at her before cracking my neck making all the inhabitants in the room cringe. “Sorry, it’s a habit by now.”

“She can crack most of the bones in her body!” Raine stated proudly.

“Weird ability to have,” Kim Namjoon stated and I shrugged.

“I can crack the arch of my foot,” I demonstrated before feeling a sharp pain in my torso which caused me to double over in agony. Then that caused more agony with my ribs.

“Jade,” Raine was quick to be by my side and support my body as I breathed in and out.

“Give me a moment, baby,” I soothed her as I continued to breath until the pain had subsided. In the process, I had bitten my lip, which reopened the split.

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“You’ve got,” Jeon Jungkook motioned towards my lip, so I put a hand up. It came away reddened, as if by magic.

“Sis, you should go to hospital,” Raine whimpered as I kept my hand over the small split in my lip. I rolled my eyes.

“I’ve been through worse, baby. You are just in bed, so you don’t see it,” I mentioned, taking the Kleenex’s that Yoongi handed me.

“I don’t want you to do this anymore,” Raine tried to cry in front of the boys.

“Raine we’ve been over this again and again. If I don’t fight, we go onto the streets. Do you want that?” I asked her, tired from the long day.

“No,” she pouted and sniffled as Jimin wrapped her up in a hug. “I don’t want to lose you like we did Mom and Dad.”

My heart melted at those words that came out of her mouth. I was her age, or at least near her age, when our parents had been robbed at gunpoint and then murdered. I took care of her with the help of our older brother Jackson.

But things quickly turned sour. He got hooked on illegal substances and became angry very quickly. I had taken fight lessons at the local gym, so I tried to protect us the best I could.
It wasn’t a whole lot, but at least I protected Raine from the majority of the damage that was inflicted by our brother. She didn’t like yelling since Jackson always yelled, but that was alright. At least she never had him lay a hand on her. I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if she would have been hurt at the hands of an individual who was supposed to protect her.

“It won’t happen,” I whispered before standing up and leaving the room. I sighed and stood with my back against the hallway bricks and tried to control myself.

“Want one?” I looked up to see Kim Seokjin offering me a pepero.

“Yeah, thanks,” I took the pepero. We stood in companionable silence for the next few moments just letting the chocolate relax us.

“So you don’t have a job?” Seokjin asked and I flushed.

“Technically I do,” I replied and he rolled his eyes.

“Yeah getting the snot beat out of you day after day,” Seokjin hip butted me.

“Hey, you should see the other guy,” I joked and he actually laughed.

“Wow,” he breathed once he had control over his laughter. “Smart, beautiful, and witty!” I blushed at his compliments.

“Shut up,” I turned my head down to the ground.

“Why? It’s all true?” Jin replied and turned my head to face him.

“No, it isn’t,” I denied it and jerked my head away from him. “I’m definitely not beautiful.”

“Oh, honey, you are extremely sexy,” Seokjin purred and I rolled my eyes.

“You keep telling yourself that,” I sighed and tried to walk around him, but Seokjin gently grabbed me, being mindful of my injuries.

“I’ll tell you that every day until you believe it and every day after that,” Jin breathed into my ear. I shuddered and actually liked the sound of that.

“So, what? Are you asking me out, Kim Seokjin, vocalist of BTS?” I turned around in his arms and wrapped my arms around his neck, gingerly.

“Don’t hurt yourself,” Jin grinned before he wrapped his arms around my waist. I winced and inhaled sharply as Seokjin let go.

“I’m sorry,” I whimpered and put my head down.

“No, honey, don’t be sorry,” Jin sighed. “I just wish that you weren’t so bruised at the moment.”

“Me too,” I grinned. He bent down and gave me a gentle kiss on the lips. https://uploads.spiritfanfics.com/fanfics/capitulos/201411/fanfiction-turma-da-monica-jovem-uma-ajudinha-na-materia-2776152,271120141313.jpg As we broke apart we could hear cheering and whistles. I groaned as I turned around to see the other members of BTS and my sister with large grins on their face.

“Get some!” Taehyung leered and I rolled my eyes as Jin wrapped his arms around my waist.

Chapter Text

A/N: Trigger warnings do apply.

“Why can’t you just be grateful for once?” My heart shattered hearing those words leave his mouth. Especially his mouth. He knew how hard I tried to bend over backwards just to help him, dropping everything, but it didn’t seem good enough.

I was never good enough, I had to acknowledge though. I would never be good enough for anyone. Not my family, not for my employer, my professors, and now not for Jungkook.

“Don’t you see how hard I work day after day? And I come home to this shit?” He gestured to the mess in the living room. I had been studying for my finals all day long, having hard exams in literature in a few days.

“I’m sorry, I’ll clean it,” I managed to state.

“No!” He bellowed and I flinched back, tears stinging in my eyes. I blinked them back, willing them not to fall. “I’m going out. To Yoongi’s where his girlfriend actually cleans?”

“What time will you be back?” My voice naught but a whisper.

“Not anytime tonight,” Jungkook didn’t spare me a glance before slamming the door of our apartment shut. I waited a few moments before rushing from the kitchen into the bedroom where I beelined to the closet. I felt around the top of the dresser before my fingers found my small solace.

I broke down in tears as I held my trusted friend in hand. He blew up like I’ve never seen him before. I couldn’t even blame him; it was all my fault. I blew my nose with an old shirt lying in a pile I meant to throw out, and then tracing the blue veins in my arm, sliced.

It was satisfying and my tears began to slow as I watched the blood well and then spill over like the diamonds in my own eyes. It was mesmerizing. I did it multiple times, in a frenzy, until my whole left arm was painted red with blood.

I went into the bathroom and grabbed the gauze. Then I washed the cuts and disinfected them before winding the gauze around my arm in practiced movements. I washed the blade and returned it to its original position. I disregarded the blood on the floor in the closet, opting to clean up my textbooks, empty mugs, and clutter from the living room.

I washed each cup and plate, drying and putting them away. Then I took out the trash. I swept the floor, so it was free of any crumbs before gathering up my school books, stacking them neatly on the desk in the corner.

I had no energy to do anything, least of all look at what started the fight. I gazed out the window, distant and numb to my surroundings. I sniffled every once in a while, feeling the mucus drain down the back of my throat. But I was calm. Perhaps a bit too calm. Perhaps disassociated with my surroundings. It happened every time I got upset. Cutting helped me ground myself, but I floated free afterwards. It felt like I could be part of a dream.

I heard the clock chime, signaling it was already eleven at night. That meant six hours had passed since our fight. Six hours I couldn’t account for. That must be a record, I thought in a dull and slow type of way before shuffling off to bed.

I laid in bed, staring at the wall. No music, no noise. Just me and the room. I felt my tears start to pour again, but I didn’t try to stop them anymore. I let them soak into my pillow, soak into my hair, soak into my skin leaving behind salinity.

At some point during the night I fell asleep, only to wake at five in the morning. I rose and went into the bathroom, changing into a pair of pants and a long-sleeved blouse. I didn’t bother changing the gauze, if I got an infection perhaps, I would die quicker. I left the apartment and blended in with the other Seoul workers who were on their way to their jobs. Some took detours to café’s, some to eateries. Myself, my detour was the Han River.

I spent my day on the shore, watching all the people around me. The mom’s with strollers, the businessmen enjoying their breaks and lunches. The homeless shuffling around for a bite to eat. The world was a loud place when you observe it, I decided. People were noisy, cars were noisy, animals were noisy.

It was all too much. I drifted from the Han River over to Gangnam, where I witnessed the masses spending money lavishly. They wore the best designer brands, ostentatious to the world. Flaunting their wealth to those who spared them a second glance.

That’s how I spent my day, drifting through the world. Wondering what made people be more productive than others. What made people want to stay on this planet? The only hypothesis I could make was greed. Everyone wanted what others had. Whether it was a car, a house, designer clothes, shoes, or food. Everyone wanted something.

Perhaps that was what was wrong with me. I didn’t want any of these things. I just wanted to be loved unconditionally. Somehow as the sun was setting, I found myself at my apartment building. I let myself in and climbed the stairs to the 25th floor. The door was still locked, and no sign of Jungkook anywhere in the apartment.

I let my keys fall into the bowl and walked over to the desk where I began to study the books I had to for my final. Nothing went in. After 6 hours and a few self quizzes I was angry. I slammed the anthology shut and escaped to my closet once more.

Once I was finished, I drew a bath and laid in it for a long time. Tomorrow would be my finals, and I wasn’t prepared. After I stared for a few moments, I drained the water and dried off. Applying my gauze before going to bed.

The next morning, I woke up fairly early after another near sleepless night. I grabbed my books and walked to the campus, knowing I was too early to take any of my exams. I sat outside the exam hall and waited.

“A bit early Lia,” my professor commented as she unlocked the door. I nodded a bit and walked inside, seating myself at the very back. She made no further comment just went about her routine. Eventually, two minutes before the exams started every student was crammed into the lecture hall.

We were given a time limit of three hours. I tried to relax and let the words flow, but my thoughts were too distracted. After fumbling through the exam, two hours and fifty-six minutes later I handed it over to the professor. Then I fled the hall and went to my next exam.

At six I was done with school. I went to the library and made sure to turn in any reference book I had that was loaned, and then went home. The apartment was noisy as I walked towards it and swung the door open.

“Congrats!” Taehyung was the first to speak and pulled me into a hug. I gave him a nod.

“How’d finals go?” Yoongi asked, cup of soju in hand. I shrugged and walked into the living room where they had drinks and snacks set up.

“Tired?” Jin grinned, ruffling my hair as he handed me a plate.

“Yeah,” I muttered, voice dry and raspy from misuse. Jungkook and I barely interacted during that evening, causing his hyungs’ eyebrows to raise in confusion, but they didn’t say anything about it. Jin and Jimin offered to help me clean up, but I refused.

By the time Jungkook came back, the mess had been cleared. I shouldered the trash bag and walked around him. Throwing it into the dumpster, I came back to the apartment only to hear nothing as I closed the door and locked it.

“Lia?” Jungkook called from the bedroom. “Is that blood in the closet?”

My blood ran cold as I remembered that I hadn’t cleaned that up. Jungkook walked over to me and raised the sleeve on my left arm.

“Oh baby. I’m very sorry,” he whispered, eyes wide with remorse.

Chapter Text

A/N: Sorry if this is triggering for anyone. But this is reality. Well except for Hoseok being my boyfriend part. I have struggled with an EDNOS specifically a purging disorder, and these are things said to me by close family members. I have been really stressed recently with a lot of things including work, anxiety, school, and finances, so i have lost about 8 pounds. I am struggling to regain it, but it's hard. And sometimes I feel alone. Anyway, enjoy.

 

Oh my god. You look anorexic. That’s disgusting. Look at how your shoulder blades poke out, that’s so disgusting. I’m not one for counseling. Just put something in your mouth and eat it. It’s not that hard.

That was the last conversation I had with my family before moving in with my boyfriend Jung Hoseok. I never told him why I suddenly texted him to accept his invitation to move into his new apartment. I kept it silent, but the words rang through my mind.

Every time I went to the store and stared longingly at the ice cream display. Every time we went out to eat with the guys who could eat an entire restaurant out. Every time birthdays came around and the rich cake was shared to celebrate their birth.

It wasn’t that I had an eating disorder. I had disordered eating. Things that I deemed safe and things that I deemed out of comfort zone. I wasn’t restricting actively or like only eating 500 calories a day or less. I wasn’t purging my food. I just didn’t feel comfortable with certain foods.

It stemmed from being a thicker child. I had always been bigger than the other kids. One of the first to weigh enough to sit in the front seat of the car. One of the first to hit puberty due to being larger than the rest of the kids. I noticed that went I sat, I had fat rolls when the other girls were thin and didn’t have that issue. I noticed when we were weighed publicly in gym class that I weighed 125 when the rest weighed around 80-100 pounds.

I was one of the heaviest kids in school – save for a few that were grossly obese. I hated myself. I hated my body, I hated everything about myself. The rolls on my stomach, the thick thighs that touched when I walked. The fat that bulged over the waistband of my low-rise jeans.

I did as many exercises as I could, but nothing worked. Sweating until water dripped out of every pore with high intensity cardio workouts. Doing the 300-crunch challenge to get defined abs. Squats and other leg exercises to curb the size of my thighs.

I tried to cut out chunks of fat like other people in the boards I was active upon did. But I wasn’t brave enough. I didn’t go deep enough. Eventually I gave up, until I was asked how pregnant I was. I flipped out and started purging everything that went into my mouth.

Within a year I went from a size 14 down to a size 8. I still hated my body, but I had no choice but to start eating again. Without a stay in a mental hospital came conditions. Keep my body weight at a certain amount. I hated that number. I hated my body still.

I kept my weight a little under. It was a compromise that I didn’t weigh under 130 but didn’t reach 140 either. But I still hated myself. I hated the look of my fatty arms, my grotesque stomach and hips. Even though I wasn’t that fat, I still hid.

Hid behind oversized sweaters, tight jeans to pretend that my thighs weren’t as large as they were and never anything cropped. Unless I was wearing high-rise jeans. Which I preferred as I didn’t have to see the fat jiggling on my hips.

My size and shape was a major issue for me. A sensitive issue. But when I met Jung Hoseok he didn’t care. He looked right past my measurements and saw me for a girl passionate about books and traveling. We would have conversations for hours regarding books and what he had seen on tour.

However, after I lost eight pounds without actively trying and hearing the comments of my family, I accepted the invitation to move in with Hoseok. It angered my family, but I needed a break. A fresh start.

Of course I didn’t recover overnight. But I did gradually gain weight with the help of the other members of BTS. They liked to eat, and since I was around them more often than not, I was also roped into their antics.

Instead of restricting, I started going to with Jungkook to the gym. He helped me build muscle and cardio. I went on runs with Hoseok and Jimin in the morning.

For the first time ever, I stopped being conscientious of my body and just living. The scale went deep into the hall closet, buried underneath linens and other knick-knacks. Hoseok was weighed with the rest of his members at the company. It was more a formality than actually putting their artists on diets any longer.

I found that I could have a piece of cake every once in a while, but not the entire cake and not every day. I could enjoy food, but also still be smart about my health.

I remember going to a shop when the entire group went on a vacation to Jeju. I didn’t have a bathing suit since I disliked showing off my body, so we spent an afternoon shopping for a bathing suit. The guys had fun picking out strange patterns and shoving them over the dressing room door.

Jimin threw a two-piece over the door. I stopped and opened the door handing it back out. He looked confused and made no motion to take the article back.

“Jimin-ah, I cannot wear a bikini.”

“Why not?” Jimin asked, confusion on his face.

“Um, I just can’t!” I couldn’t think of a reason why except for blurting out how awful my body looked. But I knew that wouldn’t go over well, since they were promoting self-love.

“Jagi, just try it,” Hoseok smiled, his lips in the shape of a heart. I inhaled and then nodded, shutting the door.

I let the bathing suit sit in my hands for a moment. Then I removed the one-piece that I was currently wearing, to pull on the bikini. I was stunned as I looked at my reflection in the mirror. It actually looked flattering. High waisted bottoms and a high neck top. I opened the door to the dressing room and stepped out.

“I think that’s the winner,” Hoseok’s voice broke the stunned silence.

“You should show off your body more often,” Jin said. “If you want to model, I’m sure we have a few contacts.”

“Oh no,” I shook my head. “I can’t be a model. Look at my body.”

“I am,” Jin disagreed. “And you look beautiful.”

“Yah! Hyung, she’s my girlfriend!” Hoseok playfully shoved Jin who sputtered in betrayal. I grinned and changed back into my street clothes. We purchased two of the bathing suits and left.

Later that night, I finally told Hoseok about my body struggles. He was furious at my family and understood why I always clammed up when talking about them. I still loved my family, but there was no denying that they did hurt me on more than one occasion.

Chapter Text

I hated the holidays. Not because I hated the holidays or what they represented, but because I had to go home. To listen to my family ridicule me for my life choices or not understand my feelings and urges regarding intimacy.

“It’s going to be fine, baby,” my boyfriend, Min Yoongi, a music producer, successful I should say, tried to ease my panic.

“You don’t understand,” I moaned, head in my hands at the thought of what was about to come. I had stopped in the middle of packing my luggage and went into a panic attack.

“Hyung, what happened?” My second boyfriend, Jeon Jungkook came into the room and sank down in front of where I was sitting on the large bed.

“She’s feeling panicky about going home,” Yoongi educated our youngest boyfriend who nodded his head in understanding. Within seconds, he had peeled off his clothes and shifted, content to comfort me in his natural skin.

Yes, he shifted into a gigantic wolf. Actually, all of my boyfriends were werewolves. All a part of the pack. I was human though, so that meant that I didn’t get to shift. It also meant that I was seen at the bottom of the wolf hierarchy system like Jungkook. With his physique I would have thought he would have been an Alpha, but the maknae of the Korean pack was actually very submissive.

Yoongi was the pack Alpha, followed by his second Jung Hoseok, Park Jimin, and Kim Namjoon. Kim Taehyung and Kim Seokjin were the Betas, the ones who kept everyone calm. Jungkook and I were the Omega’s essentially. The ones who were soft and maternal in a way?

“No tears,” Hoseok came into the room. Soon after, all of the pack were gathered around me, some in their wolf forms to offer comfort. We ended up piling together and falling asleep.

In the morning, it was a rush to get packed since the train left at noon. Due to our pack bonding, Jungkook, Yoongi, and I were scrambling to get packed in time to board the train and then make it to my family’s house.

“I’m scared,” I told Yoongi as we sat in our compartment on the train.

“Don’t be scared, baby,” Yoongi soothed, laying my head over his chest so I could hear his heartbeat. This was proven to help me relax and stop my anxiety attacks.

“We’ll be with you every step of the way,” Jungkook promised, love shining in his round, doe eyes. I reached out a hand and linked our fingers together. “Together always.”

 

The cab ride was silent as I fiddled with the zipper on my coat. Yoongi didn’t like this habit but had to agree it was better than my picking at my head whenever I was nervous. The two wolves didn’t say much, since they really didn’t know how to stay my nerves due to my family.

Yoongi paid the driver as Jungkook got the suitcases from the trunk. I stood looking up at the Victorian mansion right on the outskirts of Boston. It was ostentatious but suited my parent’s image. Old ivy covered much of the front, along with beautifully coiffured landscaping. Although the landscaping was covered by a thick layer of white snow, my parents had still paid to have the holiday decorations done meticulously.

“This is where you grew up?” Yoongi asked, wrapping an arm around my waist. He startled me, being so focused on my inner thoughts. I nodded, knowing that he had grown up in a small apartment. It wasn’t big enough for him, his brother, or his parents to have space to breathe. Jungkook lived in a bigger place, but his parents still weren’t rich like mine, Jin’s, Namjoon’s, and Jimin’s parents are.

“Yeah. This is my house of horrors,” I choked out a teasing laugh. Jungkook snorted along with Yoongi at the description I provided for this house.

“It definitely gives me a Poe-like vibe,” Yoongi nipped at my ear before beginning the walk up to the door, a suitcase in hand.

“Let me help!” I whined, trying to pull one of the suitcases from Jungkook’s grasp. He just shook his head and walked up the sidewalk.

“Y/N!” My mother greeted me, opening the door before we had a chance to get close enough to knock or ring the doorbell. “Come in, come in.” She kissed my cheek before beaming with delight at the sight of my boyfriends.

“Mrs. Y/L/N,” Yoongi greeted her.

“Nonsense! Call me Y/M/N,” she was warm, as was expected. The only thing she ever wanted was for you to have a relationship and to have grandkids. Little did she know; you were never having grandkids as that involved sex. Which you were not comfortable with and have explained that to her on many levels. “I’ve heard so much about you two!”

“Mom,” I tried to corral her as the door was still wide open.

“Oh yes, come in, come in,” with that, you all moved further into the foyer. “Leave the suitcases. Maria will take them to your room.”

“Thanks, Mother,” I sighed, feeling overwhelmed already. She led us into the drawing room where my Father and aunt were seated. They were sipping on brandy and wine but looked up upon our arrival.

“Y/N,” my father was stiff. He didn’t approve of having two boyfriends. He actually called me many names regarding it when I first told them. Luckily, he had no clue that I had seven.

“Father,” I gave a strained smile. Jungkook, smelling my tension, put a hand on my lower back. I relaxed, minutely, and sat down on the sofa beside the two.

“Wine?” She asked. Three glasses were pressed into our hands before we had a chance to decline. Jungkook and I weren’t much of drinkers. Mine was more so due to the anxiety medication I was on, but Jungkook didn’t like being impaired.

Yoongi took a sip of the wine in his hand. He was used to having to drink in a social manner with all the parties he had to attend.

“I hear that you Yoongi are a music producer?” My mother sat down in her chair.

“I am,” Yoongi was proud of his achievements. We all were. From a teen who made a few hundred on selling songs and getting ripped off, to a multibillionaire, he had shown the world he could persevere. “I am a top producer at Universal Records.”

“And you Jungkook?” My father didn’t show if he was impressed by that knowledge.

“I am a movie producer,” Jungkook sat up straighter, setting the wine glass on the side table.

“Oh?” My aunt was being condescending. “Any movies that we might know?”

“It was always my dream to be the executive producer of an Ironman movie. The latest film, I produced,” Jungkook smirked. “We broke box office records, did you hear?”

“I did,” my aunt looked like she had sucked on a sour lemon.

“How did you meet Y/N?” My father asked. “She’s not a music producer nor is she a part of the film industry. In fact, she makes a modest living.”

I shrunk back in my seat due to the reminder how I wasn’t anything special. Yoongi growled a little, while Jungkook curled his hand around my waist, squeezing my hip.

“I’d like to say that it was fate and we are soulmates,” Jungkook’s voice was cold as he informed my father.

“When we saw her at a museum exhibition, we knew that it was fate,” Yoongi said. I even wanted to shiver at the icy answers my father was receiving from my two packmates.

“I for one, think this is a great thing!” My mother gushed. “Y/N always said she wouldn’t have a relationship with anyone. But I told her to give it time and she’d find someone.”

“Mother, we aren’t having sex,” I was blunt as always. My father coughed a bit uncomfortable.

“Nonsense!” My mother grinned. “With these two gorgeous men?”

“I told you I’m asexual,” I stood up, feeling angry. “I don’t want to have sex, I don’t even like kissing.”

“Stop fooling around.”

“I’m not fooling around. My boyfriends love me for who I am, not what I am willing to give them,” I snapped. “And if you don’t mind, I’m going to show them around the house. Dinner is in thirty minutes, right?”

“Yes,” my mother sagged into her seat while I tugged them both up off the sofa. Yoongi and Jungkook were content to follow me outside of the drawing room and up the stairs. I collapsed in my bedroom, with Yoongi catching me.

“It’s alright baby,” Yoongi’s low and comforting voice brushed over my tortured mind. I grasped onto his shirt collar, tears leaking from the corners of my eyes.

“Shh, sweetheart,” Jungkook’s large hands brushed the tears off my face and the hair that was hanging in my eyes.

“Why can’t she understand?” I sobbed, turning my head into Jungkook’s neck. He shushed me but was unable to comfort me in the standard way since we were at my parent’s house.

 

“Tomorrow we leave,” Yoongi decided after a tense dinner that ended with my latest breakdown two days after we arrived. “I’m not putting you through any more emotional and verbal abuse.”

I fell asleep that evening cocooned in between two of my mates, overjoyed by the information that we would be leaving the next day. That plus my exhaustion from the entirety of the trip enabled me to fall into a deep sleep.

I know my mates were loathe to wake me the next morning, but the tickets were for the one o’clock train. We packed and ten informed my parents over a late breakfast that Yoongi’s brother – Jin – had called. There was an emergency in our house and were needed home right away.

They were understanding and handed over a dozen presents before we left. Once we were home, I fully relaxed, sitting on the lap of Jimin. He was concerned over the deep circles under my eyes, but was content to let me unwind.

We spent the next three days before Christmas just relaxing as a pack. They would take turns shifting and comforting anyone. I laughed as I was smothered in a dog pile courtesy of the youngest males – Jimin, taehyung, and Jungkook.

Chapter Text

A/N: Triggering content. Anorexia, self harm. Verbal abuse.

“Do you know what I’ve given up for you?” Jimin roared, his voice bellowing throughout Bangtan’s dormitory. “The sacrifices I’ve made for our relationship?”

I could feel the tears stinging in my eyes. Of course, I knew that my sexuality would come back to be used against me. Like it had time and time again. I told him my preferences, but he accepted it very easily. ‘Of course, baby. I love you for who you are, not what you can give me.’

“Jimin, please,” I tried to soothe, keep my voice and tone neutral. “Let’s just talk this over, have a civil conversation.”

“No!” He snapped, veins obscenely protruding out of the skin in his neck. “I’m done. I’m going to go find a real woman.”

With those words he turned away. My heart shattered at his words – real woman. Real woman. Real woman. It was like a movie reel playing over and over again in my head.

“If you walk out that door, we are over,” I threatened him. “I won’t take you back, ever.”

“It’s been ended for months, Elle,” Jimin laughed and slammed the door of the dormitory.

It was quiet – the rest of the members had left to give us privacy tonight. We were celebrating our year anniversary, when Jimin’s hands wandered and his kisses started to get a bit more searching. I brushed him off and that’s when our fight began.

I waited a few moments to make sure he didn’t walk back in the door, before breaking down in tears. Jimin had known all my insecurities. All the reasons why I hated myself, and he played them all tonight. A Royal Flush, but only with my feelings.

I knew I was broken. I knew I was different. But Jimin had always assured me it was fine. That if someone loved another, they would accept them for what they are. Besides, he’d smile, eyes disappearing in moons, that’s what his hand is for. No biggie.

Once I managed to breath in air without sobbing, I walked to the bathroom. I splashed water on my face, hiccupping as I did so. Then I left the bathroom to clean up the champagne and the broken glass in the living room. Once that was done, I retrieved some of the items that I deemed most important from Jimin’s room, before leaving the key on the entrance table.

“Thanks for the memories,” I murmured, before flicking off the lights and leaving the dormitory. I said goodbye to the door man and left Hannam Hill’s. I wouldn’t be back, at least not in this lifetime.

The next day, I was gone from Seoul. I transferred to Daegu. Teaching English as a Second Language in Korea had some perks. And the school in Daegu was very persistent. Knowing that I was willing to take it, they had train tickets and an apartment open for that same day.

I didn’t have much. I had just brought some of my journals, books, and a bit of clothes to Korea. All in all, I really only had a couple of boxes of things that were very important. The rest the company promised to move to Daegu within the week.

 

Daegu was nothing like what I was picturing. There were little cars in the main downtown district which was amazing. The outskirts looked a bit intimidating with the numerous industrial parks and whatnot, but overall, I found that I rather enjoyed Daegu. It was definitely hotter than Seoul, I thought, as I adjusted my skirt and fanned my face with my other hand.

Within one week of moving into the apartment, I was in the classroom. The kids were nice and friendly. They wanted to learn, to be able to leave Daegu and go to Seoul National University. They always asked me what I thought of Seoul.

However, even though the locals were friendly and nice, my mental health was spiraling out of control. One night I purchased a craft knife and slashed right into my hip bones. Something I hadn’t done in years. Suddenly, I was addicted again.

I couldn’t go one night without needing my knife. I was running out of hip space. My thighs were next. I carved the word broken and worthless into my legs one night. I watched the blood run down my pale and soft thighs. The blood beaded and then ran downwards as gravity dictated. Yet, gravity still couldn’t make my mind turn off. Couldn’t pull the bad thoughts down like the blood streaking my leg.

Following my relapse with the razor blade, came the insomnia. I would cut to sleep, and sleep to cut. Go to school. Come home. Cut. Sleep. Start my day over again and again. Until one night I couldn’t do the latter. My routine graduated to Teach. Come home. Cut. Clean the apartment. And then it would begin again.

I booked an appointment with an endocrinologist. She told me I had nothing wrong. No hormones were off, no medications would give me a libido. I cried, begging her for something to make me normal. She sympathized but could only give me the business card of a psychologist. There was nothing physically wrong with me regarding sex.

I tore up the card to the psychologist. I didn’t want to go. I didn’t need to go. After that doctor’s appointment, my habit got worse. I started not eating.

Nothing was appetizing. It all tasted like sawdust and disappointment. I forced myself to eat every now and again, but it wasn’t like my body was requesting such sustenance.

After four months, my body had deteriorated so much I was unrecognizable. My once thick, lustrous hair was thin and brittle. My clothes hung off my emaciated frame. My cheeks were gaunt and hollow with dark circles around my eyes. I looked gray from loss of blood.

“ELLE!” I heard a voice call out one day as I was wandering the market. I turned to see Min Yoongi. He looked happy until he caught sight of my physical shape. “What the fuck did you do?”

“Nothing,” I denied, staring up at the Daegu rapper. “What are you doing here?”

“Well I was here visiting family, when one of my aunt’s kids mentioned her English teacher’s name. I asked around and found you,” Yoongi led me over to a bench.

“You shouldn’t have found me,” I whispered.

“I should have found you earlier,” Yoongi shook his head. “I can’t believe what an idiot Jimin was.”

 

“How is he?” I asked, burning curiosity over the fate of the man I love.

“Fine. Better than you,” Yoongi’s voice was sharp. “He has a girlfriend.”

“Oh,” I mumbled. “Is she normal?”

“She’s a bitch,” Yoongi stated in his blunt manner. “No one likes her. I don’t know what he sees in her.”

“Sex,” I whispered.

“Jimin is a fool,” Yoongi’s sharp voice rebutted. “If you were mine, you’d never leave.”

“You can’t mean that,” I shook my head. “I can’t give you release Yoongi. Or any man. No one wants me. Jimin said it the best. I’m just not normal.”

“For Chrissakes,” Yoongi swore. “If I wanted sex, I’d pay an escort or a prostitute. Elle, I’ve been in love with you for over two years. But you liked Jimin, so I decided to put my feelings on the backburner.”

“What are you saying?” I whispered.

“I wouldn’t treat you like Jimin did. I would never prey on your feelings and your sexuality,” Yoongi sighed. “Perhaps if I acted when I first saw you, I wouldn’t be looking at such a painful shell.”

“I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship right now,” I let Yoongi lift my chin so I could look him in his molten brown eyes.

“No, you need to learn to love yourself first,” Yoongi agreed. “But I’ll be with you, every step of the way.” With that Yoongi pressed a kiss to my nose. “You won’t ever feel like you did, Elle. I promise you that.”