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A bad wolf running beside the storm

Chapter Text

 

Timelessness

Once she had been very young, so young that she saw the beginning of the explosion, no, she herself had been part of that explosion, she had seen her own expansion and growth, coming to undulate the currents of time and space.

Each concept was new, as new as his new consciousness.

He had seen universes and stars born. From the smallest star to the largest universe, she had seen things that, like her, had been part of the explosion, fighting and convulsing everything in its path; she herself had not been in the beginning, because before time and space exploded, it had only been that, that before time, and it was fine, because when those unnameable things returned to their original state, they brought life and death to everything, she began to live, observing, absorbing every ounce of information, and inevitably living and going in all directions of life.

Because she had never lived. But now she was not alone, she was divided into three and scattered in time, there was the oldest of her, who had kept the first memory and very far, gathering everything she herself saw in the present, but capitulating in the past. And when he stretched to the end, the future, because everything had an end and a beginning, he appreciated the light there and longed for the darkness, because it had been his home long before the explosion occurred.

And it was never boring again. Life brought a lot of fun, a lot of light and many flashes of darkness, life had inevitably become the only thing new. He played and walked in many places, space needed time to grow and time needed space to exist, one could not exist without the other and they were terribly dependent.

Like her with others.

But once there was a thing, as smart as her, about to die, that dying thing only asked for something, small and sad: it asked for life, and he gave it to her, he didn't know how, but she gave it, and that thing in exchange for the small gift, he offered his heart.

He had never had a heart in his hands before. The pain and happiness were indescribable, and she went everywhere to disappear, but she never found a place deep enough, far enough away to take that thing away from her. She was known by many names in all universes, in all languages, life had taken it upon herself, but she felt pain and learned that life was not only playing and having fun, but also feeling bitter.

He had learned a new feeling. She was pleased.

There was one name in particular that she had clung to, attached to the heart that had given her, that name had a great connection like her, not as great as the full total it represented, but close.

The heart became much more painful to be around the child, and that is why I plan, plan together with the original owner of the heart for that son of time, take his numb conscience and wake up, making sure of the events of that thing planned during centuries, they will take the right course to settle carefully.

 

DOCTOR WHO DOCTOR WHO 

 

 


If human organisms had as good a memory as the Time Lords, they would know that the first thing was always the egg. But we all know that our ancestors were part-time lords, therefore we can argue that perhaps one or two propellers were lost during the first human age. But you must remember that good human memory amounts to thousands of wars and deaths over time, the brightest lives consumed by destruction. Maybe she hadn't been human for a long time, but she herself always knew she had been the Bad Wolf first, and then Rose Tyler. But nobody remembered that old story, his own human memory had not been able to remember until he had looked at the heart of the TARDIS and its song echoed in his mind.

If only children were still children forever, they would have remembered it, because children always remembered good stories.

If that were the case, she would have allowed herself to love the man in front of her purely forever. That man she had missed with every part of her existence and seeing him now caused a bittersweet wave of everything bad and good.

His voice, used after many years in silence, was heard hoarse in his own ears, but that name, that name that the stars had once written, that name that once caused entire civilizations to kneel and cringe in fear, a name he had always carried the promise of life and death had been a name he had wanted to pronounce aloud for a long time, so much so that he had lost count.

When she landed again in her home universe, her TARDIS, so young and inexperienced, had come very close to falling into a black hole, so close that the event horizon of that hole had kept her gravitating around 2,667 billion years. Her TARDIS had burned her core, almost her entire heart, just at the exact moment that the black hole had finished absorbing the last star that was in that instance of the universe in order to leave. She was almost dead, as was her TARDIS.

 

But no, the explosion of the black hole had thrown it at a speed compared to light, leaving it at a point in the universe and the time where everything was still young and new, because all the Artron energy that had been swallowed had altered it, to the point of having turned it into a built-in time travel black hole, where the Time War had not yet happened and the Gallyfreyan was still learning how to use the fourth dimension, her body had been on the verge of collapse and the Bad Wolf saved her by joining another being like her in destruction, the Moment had been called.

He had been in a lethargic state, watching the suns and Mondays rise and fall, until a curious and fantastic boy saw the Desenfrana Schism, where he could see the Time Vortex and ran towards it and had remembered everything.

Herself, being Rose Tyler.

I could never leave it again. Although some of his memories were fragmented, he used telepathic ability and joined the TARDIS, which was once stolen and turned into a blue police box.

But there were failures. Because technically it was linked to the Moment, which was the most dangerous weapon created, but it was also linked to the TARDIS, to the two TARDIS, which existed in all time and space.

Something like that shouldn't have existed, the Guardians of the Universe were horrified with her, she was in her most sublime essence, an abomination, but before being part of the Moment and after that, they had hit the clamor of the stars when they saw that she could give all that power to that boy, his lonely little boy, to end everything, and only if he decided. None of them had understood the importance of that child so early in time.

And after waiting almost three thousand years, it is not necessarily linear time, because his sense of time was dissociated with his real sense of his own life, he got closer, much more than before. Because she wanted to, she needed to see him, she wanted him to see her eyes and know she would do anything for him.

From destroying itself, to destroying the entire universe, just to keep it safe.

Her eyes widened, just a little more than normal and she felt her heart beat faster, but the surprise was masked by that grumpy face. And since she loved that new face, well, she loved all faces, because she had known all the doctors, from the abrasive young man with his granddaughter, then with the lively and scruffy man, with his flute making music in the corners of the TARDIS, and while it was true that when he was exiled on earth he had become much more affable, that Doctor had also had a more paternalistic and authoritarian air, much faster to challenge his superiors than his two previous bodies, to the point that he tended to get angry when his patience reached its limit.

He had loved the first two, but the third, oh, with the third of him his rebellious personality was born, and she had loved it. He had always been a rebel, he had never fit into the Academy, but since he had come to earth his personality had been shown in all its glory. And that other Doctor with dark curls, so tall and with that multicolored scarf had been her greatest enigma, going from zero to one hundred like her previous predecessor with dizzying speed that had left her wanting to run on more than one occasion, but no Because together with Sarah Jane Smith they had been fantastic.

And when he died, he had left a great mark, so large that his next body had been vulnerable with a sensitivity that she had only seen when she was a child, and more than ever she had tried to protect him, she had tried to speak to him for the first time. While he still had that face but his voice had only echoed in the corridors of the TARDIS. She herself had thought that perhaps Peri, the brilliant Peri Brown, could see or hear her, but no, before she could prove it, the Doctor had sacrificed her life to save her.

To think that with all her power she could avoid their deaths, because she never stopped being painful, but she knew there was a course to follow.

And when the Doctor had his next face, for the first time in centuries, he found mixed feelings regarding this new personality. He had been smug and cocky, his ego so big, bigger than TARDIS herself, and she once thought that had been impossible, but no, he too had become too manic, volatile towards everyone, with an imperturbable and simplistic wit shown on the outside, but to the point that his own personality was a fatalistic boil.

Meeting each doctor was always especially fantastic and wonderful, each different but always the same. It was like going into an ice cream parlor, without thinking especially about what ice cream to eat and then you see one, perhaps the color or its name were the ones that most caught your attention and tells the person at the counter to give it to you. You do not know what you are facing, you have no idea if you end up hating or enjoying that ice cream that you have never tried before, but you still risk it, because you love ice cream.

It had been that simple to love him. Loving him was like loving ice cream and she had always been a risky consumer, well, maybe not her, but Rose Tyler had been. And by knowing that personality of his, so obsessed with morals and his battle against evil, spending all his empathy mistakes, he had revealed a side of the Doctor that he had never thought to visualize. She had loved him, but for the first time in a long time she had felt a resentment towards him that she never thought she had harbored.

And it did not diminish with his next face. Always with nervous energy during her first steps, she had to follow this Doctor very closely. A combination of his past and future, at least those that Rose Tyler knew personally, this new face with an umbrella had been clumsy, still curious and charming, but with no sense of preservation and over time, when he began to choose his battles and keeping his secrets, he continued advancing to a calm, too serious and contemplative at the same time, sometimes leading to malice and manipulation that he had not seen in a long time.

His plans had become erratic, even the planned ones and this Doctor, with that face he had begun to lie much more frequently and easily to his companions, oh and the things he had done to the wonderful Ace, she had understood, yes, he had always done it, but this time she couldn't stop the resentment from growing, until it became ugly and dark.

Now a hatred was born in her that she had never thought of feeling for the man she loved before, but she did. Because seeing him with Ace had made her remember herself with her first and second Doctor. This umbrella doctor had been especially fond of chess and she had stopped seeing him at some point. Unwilling to keep track of his games and manipulations, he had consciously lost himself in the TARDIS and had not appeared until he heard the disturbance in the TARDIS and the shooting.

With curious eyes he saw the new Doctor enter with Grace Holloway. And this as it had been different, and she did not exaggerate. This Doctor in his Mr. Darcy dress, and she had searched very hard in his memory to make comparisons, had been almost innocent. Not vulnerable as his exiled Doctor, no, more like ... calm, without that storm inside him like the others, with his desire to do good and encourage the beings around him to do better.

She had been attracted once again to her natural charm and had watched all her first steps and her fight with the Master, and if she had been the human teenager she once was, jealousy had taken a toll on her in seeing him so interested in Grace, but no, because she had seen him be a father, grandfather, friend, mentor, scientist, philosopher and a Doctor, always a Doctor, but very rarely had he been a man, a man in the romantic sense, of course.

And he had understood a little later that part of this new Doctor had a lot of influence from Grace Holloway and he knew that she had broken both hearts a bit when she had not wanted to go with him to the TARDIS. She had fallen in love with this new Doctor again, because his freshness had been so good for her that she felt young again and eager to discover all that he could show her.

Everything went dark with the War of Time until his conscience and it was not until he put his hands on the Moment, that everything had been illuminated about future events and she was happy, because if anything was certain it was that in the end, everything would be fine.

The memories of her next Doctors, her first two, were a bit fragmented, because TARDIS had closed all ties with her, for three hundred years alone, wandering in the entire TARDIS, until that face with a big chin and green eyes he made his appearance, and yet it had been an echo, almost like River Song.

It was not correct until this grumpy face with a northern accent and she had studied it, this new he, all these thousands of years before and after Clara Oswin Oswald, because she had snooped a little in her future and this new man was the totality of all his lived experiences, was the sum of thousands of years of battles and pain, of his greatest congratulations and losses, this Doctor, old and moody, was his Doctor.

Taking it to that beach by opening a temporary loop had been a risky bet, but TARDIS had made the decision for it by sliding too easily into the parallel universe.

Now was the moment of truth. He opened his mouth again to speak but this new Doctor raised his hand, with the universal stop sign, that more his cold look made her close her mouth suddenly, feeling the change in the environment.

"No, don't talk." Voz her voice was hard, with the heavy accent between her words and the repetitive sound of the waves in the background, she thought without a doubt that it was a good way to meet him. Clara Oswin Oswald looked at her uncertainly and she smiled at him amicably, or what at least she thought was friendly. His interactions with humans had become reduced to observation alone.

 He approached her, slowly but decisively, and in a matter of a tenth of a second, she knew why she was always counted, took out the sonic screwdriver and directed it towards her. She let out a laugh and he froze, his knuckles had turned white in his grip on the screwdriver and his frown had deepened further. She smiled at him even more, making a movement with her tongue that she hadn't done in ... a long time, and the storm in her blue eyes returned.

“ What. Are. You? ”

She does not doubt. “Ros ...” her scream made her shut up and her smile slipped, losing her. Something was not quite right. But what could have been wrong?

"You are not her." he growled under his breath "Then you can never pronounce that name. Do you understand me?" He approached, dragging sand in his path, and with only a space of two centimeters away, he brought the sonic screwdriver directly to his face, he felt something cold move near his heart.

They were looking me straight in the eye. He must have recognized her, it was impossible not to, she always knew it was him with a look in her eyes, no matter what face they were on, she always knew when she was her Doctor.

Making a bold move: she took his face in her hands and slowly watched the fight in her blue eyes freeze, giving way to a mixture of feelings, but absolute terror was the predominant one. He couldn't bear it, so he smoothed the skin over the edge of his eyes, tenderly touched his cheekbones and pulled him closer, nose to nose.

“Hello, look at me, Doctor, it's me. It really is me. "

And something happened that he had rarely seen and never, never in this new Doctor, his old eyes crystallized. This grumpy doctor with so much fire inside let out a small tear and slid down his left cheek, moistening his own thumb that was on the way.

The sonic screwdriver fell into the sand and broke her heart when he looked at her with utter desolation through those tired eyes.