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Undyne Babysits

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Undyne is sitting on baby powder playing with her purple thing.

"Wow!", the one eyed fish lady exclaimed. "This has to be more fun than that one time I potato hunted with Will Ferrell!"

Undyne starts to have a flashback of that time when she and Will Ferrell were potato hunting, where she screamed at Will Ferrell, "Will, quit dicking around and help me shoot these potatos!"

That however, is a story for another day, because the writer of this story does not want to explain the whole flashback.

Just then, Undyne gets a call from her cheesecake phone that she keeps hidden in her underwear for emergencies. She picks the phone up rigorously and yells in a Scottish accent, "STAY OUT OF MY SWAMP!"

The person answers back in a poorly done Irish accent, "Guten tag fellas! This is Shaun Morgan! You might know me from Seether. I got this farting kid and I need some dumb bitch to babysit him. Do you have any experience with farting kids?"

Undyne thinks hard and says, "Well, the only job I had before was a member of the Royal Guard. Sure, I"ll watch over your kid. By the way, I love your music!"

Shaun Morgan answers back, "Great! I'll be there in 17 seconds, you hot potato! By the way, thanks for he compliment."

Undyne decides to pass the time by doing curling naked. She then hears a ring at the door, and puts her clothes back on and fingers over to the door.
Undyne opens the door to see Shaun Morgan's kid standing there all alone.

"Put your money in the back, put it in!" The kid greets Undyne as they lick a frozen taco on stick.

Undyne looks fabulous and asks, "Where's your mom?"

The kid answers, "She was late for her job at the banana factory. Can I come in?"

Undyne sets the kid on her tripod stand gives them a glass of her favorite drink, a milky milk shake. The kid spat it out on Undyne's face and says, "This tastes like blue waffle! I'm hungry! Make me a saaaaaaaaaaaalaaaaad!!"

Undyne looked at them weird and said, "Really, punk? You want a salad? I know how to make a really good retarded strawberry pop tart."

The kid started to cry out like a dying seal. It got so loud and annoying that's Undyne's Fins and vagina started bleeding, which caused her to scream like hell and escape to the kitchen.

Undyne asked herself in the kitchen, "How will I ever shut this little douchebag up?"

Then that gave her an idea. She decided to make a salad out of her esophagus, a blood covered chainsaw, and a tiny hooligan. She gave this salad to the kid and it finally shut them up.

Just then, Shaun Morgan finally showed up, only to find his child eating Undyne's "salad".

The child says in blood covered lips, "Mmmm. Best babysitter ever."

Undyne is scared and Shaun Morgan yells, "You little fat tomato! You're the worst baby sitter in the world!"

Undyne tries to explain herself and apologize but it was too late. Shaun Morgan kicks Undyne into space where she hits her left fin on Sandra Bullock. She then dies, but not before uttering her final word,

"Dickballs"

 

THE END