“So … you’re saying … you like me. That’s … that’s what I got.” She said, still a bit dazed from the kiss, making Maggie chuckle.
“Of course, you're not gonna go crazy on me, are you?”
“Yeah.” And with that she pulled the detective in for another, more passionate kiss. She was sure she would never get tired of kissing Maggie who tasted so sweet and smelled like chocolate for some reason. They stood in the middle of the apartment, kissing for what seemed like hours, finally Maggie pulled away resting her forehead on Alex’s smiling gently.
“Pizza’s getting cold.” She looked up at the taller woman who still had her eyes closed, her face holding an expression that could only be described as disbelief.
“Hmm?” She finally let her eyes open and looked at the detective in pure adoration.
“And the beer’s getting warm. You were hungry, remember?”
“Hmm…yeah hungry…” Alex’s response drew a giggle from Maggie who moved to get the pizza from the counter and brought it to the coffee table and made herself comfortable on the couch. She looked back ad the DEO agent who stood frozen in her spot with the dreamy look still on her face.
“Wanna bring that beer over?” Maggie’s voice brought her back to reality which she was still doubting was actually real but she was going to go with it.
“Beer yeah…” She got the previously opened beers and stumbled her way to the couch.
“You okay there?” The detective gave her a curious look while helping herself to a piece of pizza.
“Yeah I just … I.” She let out a breath of frustration. She didn't know how to explain what she was feeling, she had never felt like this. How was she supposed to explain something she had spent her whole life believing it wasn't real. Before Maggie had walked into her life Alex felt isolated from the world. Yes she had friends and Kara but she had always felt like there was a part missing from her life and so she felt like she didn't really fit in the puzzle. She had thought that the lack of emotion and personal attachment would make her a better agent but now sitting across from Maggie, knowing that she could kiss her whenever she wanted to made her realise what she had been missing.
Maggie tilted her head, smiling, understandingly encouraging her continue but to take her time with processing her feelings. Alex took a few deep breaths trying to calm her erratically beating heart.
“I’m kind of overwhelmed.” She finally breathed out, letting out a soft laugh with the admission.
“You praising my kissing skills, Danvers?” At that Alex blushed and launched herself in a stuttered explanation of the jumbled ball of emotions she was trying to make sense of.
“Hey I’m kidding. I know. It’s a lot. It’s a lot for me too and I’m not here to judge you for your feelings, I’m here to tell you that they're real and valid, okay? You don’t have to explain yourself to me if you don’t want to. Now eat before I inhale the whole pizza.” Alex let out a breath and relaxed a bit into the couch. She nodded as she chewed on her newly acquired piece of pizza.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Why now? I mean it took you getting shot to get you to admit that I’m the girl you want to kiss?” It wasn't an accusation it was a simple question that didn't hold any anger or judgement. She wasn’t angry with the detective for rejecting her. She was hurt and at first had blamed herself, then she had felt embarrassed and had taken it out on Maggie but eventually she’d understood where the brunette had been coming from so she had taken her pain and and had stuck it in deep for the sake of their friendship.
“Alex I …” The detective started with a sigh but was immediately cut off by the other woman.
“I’m not angry or trying to blame you. Just curious.” The soft smile and the gentle tone of Alex’s voice helped reassure Maggie that the taller woman wasn't going to throw her out of her apartment.
“I uh…. I like you, Alex. I have ever since you forced me out of my crime scene…”
“You mean my crime scene.”
“Sure. But first you were straight and then you weren’t, wait this is a mean thing to say you were never straight you just hadn't figured it out yet, and I was in a relationship and then I wasn’t.” She was rambling nervously, a habit which seemed she had picked up from Alex, “Everything was happening so fast and then you kissed me and I said all those things which were stupid but I still kind of mean because I like you too much to be just your first experience.” She paused to look at the agent who was looking at her intensely. She took a deep breath and continued,“I’m scared that you'll realise that I’m not the one for you, that you'll get tired of me and you'll move on. You terrify me Alex Danvers. But getting shot, made me realise that I’m more terrified of not having at least given us a chance. I’m terrified of you but I'm also terrified of not having you in my life, Alex.”
She stared back at the redhead, who put her pizza and beer down, wiped her hands with a napkin and turned to the detective, taking her face in her hands and bringing their lips together. She kissed Maggie with everything she had, and for a person who’d never particularly enjoyed kissing before, it was a lot.
“You terrify me too, Maggie Sawyer. And I don't think I’ll ever get tired of you. Or kissing you.” To make her point Alex dropped another kiss to the detective’s lips, “And I would never hurt you and if I ever did I’ll make sure Supergirl throws me into space.” Maggie laughed breathlessly and nodded moving closer to cuddle the badass agent. They stayed close, leaning on one another and long after the pizza and the beer were gone and they were watching old Friends reruns Maggie nudged Alex.
“You know, it wasn’t getting shot. I knew you were the girl I wanted to kiss since you waltzed in on my crime scene.”
“Hmm…” Alex hummed as she tried to decide if she should engage Maggie in the discussion of whose crime scene it was.
“Remember when I said I didn't like being intimate? I don't know about other kinds of intimate and I’m sure we’ll talk about it later but…” She paused to take a breath then whispered softly, “I’m pretty sure I like this kind of intimate.”