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the old king is dead (long live the king)

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king_allie entered the chat at 3:49 am

king_allie : is anyone on?

king_allie : tonight was...rough

king_allie : ......marco i can see your little green light i know you're on

evil_stepbrother : sorry my king

king_allie : marco you don't have to call me that you know

evil_stepbrother : i know

evil_stepbrother : but yeah, you're right, tonight was bad

evil_stepbrother : he found me first

evil_stepbrother : told me he was going to kill all of you slowly and i couldn't do anything about it

evil_stepbrother : and then he killed me

king_allie : wait marco you speak french

evil_stepbrother : a little

evil_stepbrother : figured it'd come in handy one of these days

king_allie : what can't you do?

evil_stepbrother : write in french lmao

evil_stepbrother : so how'd he do it?

king_allie : i knew what he was saying then, but it faded when i woke up and i don't speak french so i don't really know what he said but

king_allie : he killed me after he revealed that lance and jen were having an affair.

king_allie : and i was crushed. not literally but you know.

king_allie : miles tried. he tried to stop him but. mordred stabbed him. he just lay there bleeding out. eventually mordred knew he wasn't going to get anything else out of me so he just. beheaded me.

king_allie : i wasn't even that important of a member of french royalty why couldn't he leave me alone i was too crushed to do anything then

king_allie : i guess it's okay. that version of me wanted to die

king_allie : sucks that i have to experience it now though

irl_merlin : i'm sorry, allie

king_allie : it's okay

king_allie : we got it right this time

jenuivere : did we?

king_allie : mordred's gone, isn't he?

jenuivere : he's gone, but. i almost ruined it. i almost ruined it again. just like last time. i knew he was coming, allie. i didn't say anything because he knew about me and lance and he'd tell you if i warned you he was coming. i'm sorry

king_allie : jen it's okay

king_allie : i swear

king_allie : you light up my life, and i love you and we've got it all worked out, right? you're dating lance and will and me and it's okay.

irl_merlin : allie and jen in a tree

evil_stepbrother : k i s s i n g

irl_merlin : thanks bro

evil_stepbrother : no problem bro

king_allie : you know we're literally dating, right?

evil_stepbrother : yes but this is fun

morgan_le_fuck_you : yeesh

king_allie : you okay morrie?

morgan_le_fuck_you : i mean, besides being killed by mordred in my dreams and being up at three am so i don't have memories of my own deaths as dreams?

morgan_le_fuck_you : i'm great, thanks for fucking asking

irl_merlin : what'd he do?

morgan_le_fuck_you : he beheaded me. which like. wouldn't have hurt much god fucking knows we've had bloodier deaths but i had to watch elaine die beforehand and it hurt so fucking much

morgan_le_fuck_you : i miss her

will_wagner : i know

morgan_le_fuck_you : oh shut the fuck up

morgan_le_fuck_you : you're literally dating three people as we speak, you don't know what the fuck it's like

king_allie : we're doing our best to find her, morrie, you know that right?

morgan_le_fuck_you : i know

morgan_le_fuck_you : it's just shitty

lancelot_85 : and at last, the prodigal knight returns

lancelot_85 : he beheaded me last of all of us on purpose

lancelot_85 : he told me

lancelot_85 : it was so i could suffer

lancelot_85 : he said if i wasn't so lustful towards jen

lancelot_85 : this never would've happened

irl_merlin : how do you know?

lancelot_85 : i'm in french two

jenuivere : fuck that shit

jenuivere : i was just as complicit in it

king_allie : it's neither of your faults

king_allie : it's mine. i should've known jen wasn't happy.

irl_merlin : like, maybe we should consider that this is all the fault of the evil dude who was prophesied to be evil instead of blaming ourselves?

will_wagner : you tell them miles

will_wagner : <3 i love him so much

morgan_le_fuck_you : this is what i mean

evil_stepbrother : as the only other single person in this chat, i gotta say

evil_stepbrother : sucks to suck

morgan_le_fuck_you : oh fuck off

irl_merlin : please don't fight guys

morgan_le_fuck_you : we're not fighting. i love him. he's my best friend

evil_stepbrother : likewise, morrie.

king_allie : i don't understand you two

evil_stepbrother : that's fair

lancelot_85 : i have a question

lancelot_85 : why's arthur a dude in every reincarnation except this one?

irl_merlin : luck of the draw?

king_allie : no miles it's okay

king_allie : guys i gotta tell you something, and i need you all to not hate me

will_wagner : i can't hate you

evil_stepbrother : you're our king, al

king_allie : listen, marco, don't call me al, okay?

king_allie : but i wanted to tell you all. i'm transgender. i've always been a girl but i just. i was born wrong. as a guy.

king_allie : so to answer your question, lance, arthur was born a dude. i just. knew that wasn't me.

evil_stepbrother : i'll never respect you any less, allie. does calling you my king bother you? should i start calling you my queen? sorry for calling you al, by the way.

king_allie : no, being called a king doesn't bother me. i am a king, after all. thank you for asking though.

morgan_le_fuck_you : if you need anyone hexed for doing anything to you hmu

morgan_le_fuck_you : i just learned a spell that makes blood leak out of people's ears from their brain

irl_merlin : doesn't that kill people?

morgan_le_fuck_you : yes

morgan_le_fuck_you : that's the point miles

irl_merlin : if you need anyone spelled a little less fatally for you i've got you

lancelot_85 : and if you want a non-magical solution to your problems, will and i can physically fight anyone who says anything to you

king_allie : thanks guys

will_wagner : no problem allie

irl_merlin : we got your back <3

jenuivere : and you know i'll fight anyone for you, babe

king_allie : i know ily babe <3

evil_stepbrother : you guys are so cute it makes me wanna vomit sometimes

will_wagner : and morrie, i think i have an idea as to who elaine might be

will_wagner : there's a girl on the props team for the play. which makes sense because of where we found the sword. so if she was the one to, you know, make it,

will_wagner : her name is elaine but everyone calls her ellie

morgan_le_fuck_you : thank you, will

morgan_le_fuck_you : it means a lot

jenuivere : and guys

jenuivere : thank you for getting on this chat after the dreams

jenuivere : i always feel so bad afterwards, like it's my fault

jenuivere : i know it isn't, but it. it always feels like it is

jenuivere : and this helps

lancelot_85 : it really does help

lancelot_85 : so thank you guys

king_allie : i think i speak for all of us when i say that this chat helps everyone. talking it out always helps. and if you ever don't want to say something here, you can pm me.

king_allie : you all know that, right?

evil_stepbrother : we know.

irl_merlin : thanks, allie

irl_merlin : we have school in two hours, and we should all get to bed.

evil_stepbrother : goodnight, nerd.

will_wagner : night, miles.

irl_merlin : goodnight everyone <3

lancelot_85 : goodnight

morgan_le_fuck_you : night fuckers

jenuivere : night!

king_allie : goodnight <3

evil_stepbrother, will_wagner, irl_merlin, lancelot_85, morgan_le_fuck_you, jenuivere, and king_allie left the chat at 4:56 am