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take me out (the date way or the assassination way)

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the first time yoongi sees him, he nearly takes yoongi’s eye out. not intentionally, although an assassination attempt wouldn’t be the most surprising thing in the world at this point. he’s catching a stray football, and yoongi just happens to be in the way.

he’s minding his own business, on his way to his apartment after his last afternoon class, a little bit groggy because he spent the latter half of the class asleep. he’s got his earphones in, and doesn’t even notice the figure hurtling towards him until a shadow settles over him, like a meteor heading for yoongi. he turns, and barely dodges an elbow to the face.

the meteor, which is actually a boy, almost falls into yoongi, but manages to both catch the ball and keep his balance.

“oh! sorry. totally didn’t see you.”

“thanks,” yoongi says, taking out one earbud but not bothering to let it drop, holding it close to his ear, “i was looking to die before midterms.”

yoongi’s not that pissed; but he thinks his naturally monotonous voice and affinity for sarcasm as well as the way he has to narrow his eyes against the sun might be making him seem angrier than he is, because the guy looks sort of taken aback. it happens more often than you’d think. it’s just how his face looks.

yoongi can’t see him all that well because he has to squint, but he can make out wide shoulders, athletic build, an unzipped varsity jacket. probably some sort of a sports major, then. yoongi doesn’t think much of sports majors. not to reinforce stereotypes, but they are usually full of themselves. and loudly heterosexual. yoongi doesn’t fuck with that. the loudly heterosexual type used to give yoongi a lot of trouble during his freshman year. or yoongi gave them trouble. he’s not really sure which way it went. usually both sides ended up with some bruises and cuts.

someone shouts in the distance. yoongi can’t make out what, but probably Athletic Guy’s name, because he perks up, blinks, like he was having some sort of a waking dream.

“ah, sorry again,” he says, and takes off.

yoongi watches his back for no apparent reason. then he raises his eyebrows, puts the earphone back in, and continues walking. he digs out his phone and opens a group chat titled HellTM. it blew up when he was in class, once again. from the looks of it, it’s one of taehyung’s daily crises. he scrolls past the eighty new messages. he’d read them later.

 yoongi [4:21]
i just had an attempt made on my life

namjoon [4:22]

jin [4:22]
it was just a question of time

jimin [4:23]
why didnt they finish the job

yoongi [4:23]
why am i friends with you




he doesn’t think about it again - why would he, it was just an unfamiliar sports major with a nice back. that is, until three days later, when he runs into him again. or rather, the guy falls out of a tree and nearly knocks yoongi out. it’s less like falling and more like landing on his feet gracefully, but it scares the shit out of him nonetheless. what are the odds of nearly getting hospitalized by the same fucking guy for the second time this week.

leaves are falling around them like slow, green rain. the guy is standing inches from yoongi, wiping bark and leaves off his clothes, head bowed, cursing under his breath. yoongi is too dumbfounded to speak.

“um,” he says.

the guy seems to finally notice he’s even there. he raises his head, eyes wide.

“shit, i’m so sorry. i nearly hit you, didn’t i?”

it’s most definitely the athletic guy from three days ago - yoongi can tell by his voice, his figure, and he’s also pretty sure he’s wearing the same white t-shirt - only the impression yoongi is getting from him now is completely different. he looks younger than yoongi would’ve thought. there are leaves stuck in his tousled hair. the collar of his shirt is stretched and hanging so low it’s bordering inappropriate. there are scratches on his toned arms. there’s a camera hanging around his neck. the guy notices him staring at it, because he hesitantly touches it, like he’s self-conscious.

“i was in the tree taking pictures,” he says, and when yoongi looks at him blankly, he hurries to add, “nothing weird. it’s for a project. the subject is campus, but it’s so generic that i wanted to do something different. i’m doing sort of, like, pictures from the perspective of a bird. that’s why i’m climbing high places.”

yoongi doesn’t know what to think. the guy who’s nearly killed him twice now is talking to him about birds and photography and yoongi keeps thinking about how much better he looks without the stupid varsity jacket. how much better he looks now that yoongi can actually see him, period.

“i didn’t ask,” he blurts, and okay, that’s what he’s doing then, being an asshole.

apparently, being an asshole is a defining trait of his, because the guy frowns, slowly, and says,

“have we met?”

“no,” yoongi says, “i have class.”

which is actually true, and he’s twenty minutes late, and he pretends to care about that as he promptly walks past Athletic Guy.

okay, so maybe he could’ve handled that a little bit better. he could’ve tried a little bit harder to not come off as an asshole. he was just... surprised. Athletic Guy was supposed to be a one-dimensional jock, at least in yoongi’s mind, possibly loudly heterosexual. but Athletic Guy takes a photography class and is also the most attractive person yoongi has seen on this campus in all of the three years he’s been here.




yoongi tries very hard to forget about Athletic Guy and the whole tree incident. the chances of meeting him again are very slim, anyway, when yoongi doesn’t even know his name or his year or his major.

but it’s like the stars keep aligning or some shit. to put it more morbidly, it’s like god keeps sending an angel of death to strike him down but yoongi keeps avoiding death, just barely. in other words, he runs into Athletic Guy again just over a week later, or his foot nearly runs into yoongi’s face, at the end of what seems to be a series of butterfly kicks.

Athletic Guy does martial arts, too. that’s great to know, he’s just going to jot that down. who the hell is this kid, he thinks to himself, watching as the guy straightens up, breathing hard, the white shirt sticking to his skin in places.

“i’m sorry,” the guy says to yoongi, and fucking pushes back his hair, damp with sweat, like he doesn’t have any idea how disrespectful he’s currently being. “did i hurt you?”

their brief interactions have all been ninety-five percent Athletic Guy almost giving him a blunt head trauma and apologizing for it. five percent yoongi being an asshole. deeply aware of this, he actually tries to act like a human being, this time.

“no, i’m fine,” he says, and mentally cringes at how unnatural the polite tone sounds, deciding it’s perhaps time to reflect on some of his life choices.

but then the guy tilts his head, looking at yoongi curiously, bites at his lip, and says, “you’re the one from under the tree”, and yoongi’s brain goes NOPE and sets off a bunch of alarms. he’s not going to get into a conversation with a gorgeous guy and have false hope just because he remembers nearly killing yoongi that one time. he’s done that before, had hope, and most of the time, the guy turned out to be straight, or just having a whole bunch of personal problems for which they expected yoongi to be the temporary solution. the last time yoongi kissed someone, he ended up never hearing from him again. a seventeen-year-old yoongi would’ve cried to namjoon about it. a twenty-two-year old yoongi didn’t cry, but he did go to namjoon, and sat curled up against his side as they watched reruns of say yes to the dress and namjoon combed his fingers through yoongi’s hair wordlessly.

so he leaves, again, the excuse of being late to class more feeble this time because he did stop to get coffee on his way despite already being five minutes late by then.




“i keep running into this guy on campus,” yoongi says. the composition homework he’s not even pretending to do anymore lies abandoned on the couch next to him. “every time i do, he tries to kill me.”

“none of my business, but sounds like you should call the cops,” seokjin comments from the floor without looking up from his history of theatre reading.

yoongi merely tilts his head in thought.

“do you think someone’s actually trying to assassinate me?”

namjoon flops down on the couch next to him, effectively crushing some of yoongi’s homework, which he doesn’t seem to care about at all.

“if anyone out of this group was going to get assassinated,” he says around a mouthful of morning roll, “it would be you.”

“thanks,” yoongi says.

“you’re welcome,” namjoon says and pats him on the shoulder.




the next time he sees him, the attempt on his life is very near fatal. it’s late and the hallways in the music building are empty. yoongi stayed late, so late the doors have already been locked, because he’s more diligent than most people give him credit for, and he actually wants to do good on his midterms. when he gets to the first floor, he hears singing. at first yoongi thinks it’s coming from a classroom; maybe someone else stayed after class, too. but it gets closer, and when yoongi turns the next corner, he’s met with the most surreal sight.

he should’ve recognized the voice sooner. he just wasn’t expecting Athletic Guy to be such a good singer, but apparently he’s on some kind of a mission to prove yoongi that he’s good at everything. he’s not only singing - he’s straight up performing, complete with emotion and choreography, feeling it like he’s on stage in front of hundreds of people instead of a dark school hallway. he has his earphones in, the phone clutched in one hand, and yoongi doesn’t know the song, but he sounds fucking amazing. he’s wearing that fucking loose-fitting white shirt again. yoongi doesn’t know what the fuck he’s supposed to do. should he turn back? he’s pretty sure the only exit that isn’t locked is up ahead. should he wait? but the guy isn’t showing any signs of slowing down.

Athletic Guy still hasn’t noticed yoongi as he walks towards him, sticking as close to the wall as possible. he gets into the chorus, doing some sort of a body roll that is already highly inappropriate for campus grounds, in yoongi’s humble opinion, but then he follows with a hip thrust that has yoongi choking on thin air. he trips on a chair that was definitely not there a moment ago. the chair makes an ungodly screeching noise. yoongi curses. the singing stops. yoongi is afraid to look up, but he does, anyway, slowly. it’s the most painful eight seconds of his life, during which they just stare at each other, both of them probably looking like deer caught in headlights.

“let me just say,” the guy says, “i thought i was alone.”

“what song was that?” yoongi voices the first coherent thought in his head.

“i need you,” the guy says, biting at his lip.

yoongi runs away.

 yoongi [7:58]

jimin [7:59]

jin [7:59]
you say that at least three times a week

namjoon [7:59]
is this about the guy you keep running into

tae [8:00]
what guy?????? are u keeping tea from me????????

jin [8:01]
theres a mysterious hot guy on campus that yoongi keeps running into like a damn romantic drama but every time they meet he ends up nearly killing yoongi

tae [8:01]

jimin [8:01]
who knew yoongi had it in him

hobi [8:02]
i did

jimin [8:02]

hobi [8:02]
not like that
im just familiar with yoongis kinks

namjoon [8:03]
that doesnt sound any better hoseok

tae [8:03]
why havent u talked to him yoongi


yoongi [8:03]

namjoon [8:04]

jin [8:04]
uh because you think hes hot? 

yoongi [8:04]
i’ll just die. thanks

tae [8:04]
stop being dramatic 

yoongi [8:05]
i dont want to hear that from a theatre major

namjoon [8:05]
for real i wanna know who he is
youve been talking about this guy for a month
just talk to him yoongi

namjoon [8:07]

namjoon [8:09]

jin [8:10]
he has the most selective ability to read ive ever seen




namjoon [11:03]
hey yoongi
answer please

 yoongi [11:06]

namjoon [11:07]
i know what youve been through and i know its hard for you to trust people because of it. i know you rarely feel like you have a real shot because of the people who fucked you over in the past, but those people were fucking assholes, you deserve better than that. you deserve to be happy and anyone would be lucky to know you. if they dont think that, they can go to hell and youre better off without them

 yoongi [11:09]
you wrote that way too fast
you wrote that beforehand and copy pasted it didnt you

namjoon [11:09]
the guy youve been talking about for a month would be lucky to know you

yoongi [11:10]

namjoon [11:11]
and im always here if you need me

yoongi [11:11]
i know 

namjoon [11:12]
love you

yoongi [11:12]
love you 2 

namjoon [11:12]
love you 3

yoongi [11:12]
go to sleep namjoon




argument: kim namjoon is simultaneously the best and the worst friend anyone could have. yoongi has endless evidence to back up the first part of the argument; their private chat history, for starters; and to prove the second part, one only has to look at the HellTM group chat after one disastrous friday night near the end of the semester.

midterms are over, and aside from jimin, all of them passed all of their exams, which is a reason enough to get drunk - if you are still young and naïve enough to think you need a reason - but yoongi has another reason called Athletic Guy, also known as It’s Been Two Months And I Still Don’t Know His Fucking Name.

“every time i see him, he’s doing something different,” yoongi complains, “who the fuck is he?”

“that is usual for people who do stuff,” namjoon says.

this is round two; they already drank to the end of midterms when they were all here, before seokjin and jimin went home for the break, hoseok went to attend his cousin’s wedding, and taehyung went to ibiza with his parents. now it’s just him and namjoon in namjoon and seokjin’s apartment. round two is definitely lamer and arguably more pathetic. it’s the dwell-in-your-regrets and cry-at-pictures-of-baby-pandas kind of a party. yoongi does mostly the first one, namjoon does the second.

there are six empty bottles of soju scattered across the table. yoongi is not sure how many of them are his and how many are namjoon’s.

“describe him again,” namjoon says, “maybe someone knows him.”

“he’s a fucking... piece of shit,” yoongi struggles to put his words together. “he’s good at everything. he dances in empty school hallways. he does martial arts on the courtyard. who does that. he climbs trees to take pictures of... birds or whatever. he’s always wearing that fucking... namjoon, that fucking white t-shirt. doesn’t he have other clothes? i’ll buy him clothes. let’s go... let’s go shopping tomorrow.”

he suddenly feels the need to lay his head on the table, for no apparent reason, so he does. yeah. that’s better.

“why is he so fine, namjoon,” he sighs, “why.”

“you could ask him,” namjoon says.

“what did i do to deserve this.” yoongi thinks it would be even better to just lie down on the table completely. he clambers up with only a little bit of difficulty. namjoon stops a bottle from rolling off the table. namjoon looks funny with his face sideways. “he’s literally trying to kill me. he’s so fucking fine. he’s trying to kill me.”

he doesn’t remember anything beyond that. he wakes up in namjoon and seokjin’s bed, fully clothed and with the headache of the century. it takes him a while to process that his phone is ringing, and it’s not just his head. he fumbles for the phone blindly, hits some part of namjoon, who momentarily stops snoring to make an uuf sound, and finally finds his phone under the blankets. he answers it just to silence it, holding it onto his ear without saying a word.

“how was last night,” comes park jimin’s way too chirpy voice.

“can’t tell.” yoongi rubs at his temples with his free hand. namjoon has gone back to snoring.

“try to remember,” jimin says, and yoongi is pretty sure he can hear a giggle. “are you going shopping today?”

“why,” yoongi frowns, “what?”

jimin laughs fully, this time.

“alright, i’m going to tell you, since you’ll see it anyway when you go on the group chat. last night, i think you had some four bottles of soju, ranted about Athletic Guy for fifteen minutes straight, and crawled onto the table and passed out. it was incredible. a masterpiece. i watched it twice.”

what,” yoongi repeats.

“the group chat,” jimin only says chirpily, “say hi to namjoon. and drink lots of water. namjoon said he left painkillers on the nightstand. bye!”

the line goes dead. yoongi lifts the phone in front of his face and looks at the notifications. one hundred and twenty new messages in HellTM. yoongi is in pain on more than one level. the first new message is a video namjoon sent last night around two a.m. it has yoongi with his head against the kitchen table as the thumbnail. it’s fourteen minutes long. the rest are messages from people he’ll be unfriending in a minute.

jimin [2:17]

jin [2:18]

jimin [2:18]

jin [2:18]
why did he climb nto the table im can;t
is he ok

namjoon [2:19]
yes hes fine i cArried him to bed
he kept repeating “hes trying to kill me”

jimin [2:20]
its a shame taes across the globe rn

hobi [2:20]
boi has it bad
like damn

jimin [2:21]

hobi [2:21]
im yoongi climbing onto the table to die

jimin [2:21]

jin [2:21]

jimin [2:22]
im yoongi volunteering as a sugar daddy

jin [2:22]
thanks joonie for documenting this important moment for posterity
youre going to die by yoongis hand but your sacrifice was worth it

namjoon [2:23]
i knw
im leaving painkillers for him on th enightstand jsyk

the conversation slows down after that and dies for a few hours, until taehyung got wifi and spammed the chat. yoongi is grateful for namjoon’s impressive consideration to prepare the painkillers, but it doesn’t save him from getting a pillow to the face as hard as yoongi can manage in his hungover state.




yoongi knows namjoon was trying to make him Realize Shit with the video, give him a push forward, but the only thing yoongi realizes is that he hates his friends. he also hates Athletic Guy and all the times he sees him around the campus. sometimes he tries to kill yoongi. sometimes he’s just standing there, either talking to someone or on his phone, earphones in and in his own world, but yoongi feels attacked either way. he thinks back to the first time he saw him, at the edge of the grass, when his elbow almost connected with his face with force that really would’ve been enough to knock him out cold.

“he should’ve killed me when he had the chance,” yoongi mutters, aware of how dramatic he sounds and not giving a shit.

“i think you should’ve been the theatre major instead of jin and taehyung,” hoseok says. yoongi was supposed to meet up with him and jimin after their dance class, but jimin’s nowhere to be seen, so it’s just him and hoseok at their go-to café on campus.

“i was, remember?” yoongi says, absently eyeing the coffee menu. “second year.”

“oh yeah.” hoseok gives a laugh. “that was a weird time. it was also when taehyung had that lizard for like two weeks and jimin shaved off most of his hair. huh. doesn’t it feel like that period was a weird, collective hallucination?”

“it does,” yoongi agrees, “why are you looking at the menu? you’re just going to get the white chocolate strawberry cheesecake.”

“you don’t know that,” hoseok narrows his eyes at yoongi before turning to the girl at the counter. “a white chocolate strawberry cheesecake, please.”

“anyway,” yoongi says as they sit at their usual table in the corner. “he was wearing a fucking beanie, hoseok. you don’t understand.”

“let me guess,” hoseok says, digging into his cake, “he looked good.”

“he looked so fucking good,” yoongi sighs, laying his arms on the table and his head on his arms. hoseok purses his lips.

“why won’t you talk to him? the semester is almost over, you know.”

“he’s straight,” yoongi mumbles. hoseok reaches over to flick his forehead. “ow.”

“you don’t know that. you thought jin was straight when you met him and now him and namjoon are dating.”

“but,” yoongi frowns, and doesn’t know how to continue. he raises his head to send hoseok a glare. hoseok only grins and shoves a spoonful of cake at yoongi.

“you know i’m right.”




his phone dings when he’s on his way home. it’s jimin in HellTM

yoongi [5:14]
where were you jimin you ditched us 

jimin [5:14]
doing the lords work
guess what

yoongi [5:15]
youre tiny 

jimin [5:15]

yoongi [5:15]
im dead serious. youre really small 

jimin [5:16]
wow. the utter disrespect. and here i am trying to help you. why do i even bother

jin [5:16]
does it have to do with dance class

jimin [5:16]
sort of!!!!!!!!!

yoongi [5:17]
you failed something 

jimin [5:17]
fine im just gonna tell u before yoongi makes me not want to tell him at all
tae and i were talking

hobi [5:18]
sounds bad

jimin [5:18]
and we agreed that based on yoongis description there is only one person we know who fits it
we only know one person who does all the things yoongis mentioned
plus hes hot so 1+1?????? its gotta be yoongis guy

yoongi stops dead in his tracks.

“are you shitting me,” he says out loud.

yoongi [5:20]
are you shitting me

jimin [5:20]
look at this pic
[image attached]
is ur guy the one in the middle

yoongi stares at the picture. it’s fairly recent judging by jimin’s hair. hoseok is in the picture, too, along with three other people. it’s taken against a mirror at a dance studio. yoongi crouches down, vaguely aware he’s just squatting in the middle of the sidewalk right now, because the one in the middle, in a light grey t-shirt and throwing up a peace sign, is Athletic Guy.

noooooooo,” he says at his phone, not sure if he wants to die or jump up and down, or jump up and down and then die.

yoongi [5:22]
whath the fuckc 

jimin [5:23]
hes in dance class with me n hoseok, only different group
BAM youre welcome

tae [5:23]
yeah thats jungkook he helps out with theatre productions sometimes

jin [5:24]
oh yeah weve hung out a few times

yoongi [5:24]
whth hf

namjoon [5:24]
yall i know jk i tutor him in english
dammit yoongi

yoongi [5:25]
WHat is happening rihgt now currently

hobi [5:25]
i cant believe youve been pining over jeon jungkook this whole time

jimin [5:25]

yoongi [5:26]

tae [5:26]
oh shit i just realized sth

jimin [5:27]

jin [5:27]
its all coming together 

jimin [5:28]

hobi [5:28]
he called u cute yoongi!!!!!
u have to go for it

jin [5:28]
i always thought me or tae would be the ones to play the lead in a romantic drama one day but little do you know its yoongi

namjoon [5:29]
yoongi are you alive




jeon jungkook is an art major. he is a freshman, which explains why yoongi hasn’t seen him around until this semester. he’s nineteen, which makes him three years younger than yoongi.

“he’s the best dancer in his group,” jimin says from where he’s lying down on yoongi’s couch, “i have a video of him covering a girl’s generation song. i can show it to you.”

“no thanks,” yoongi says weakly. he’s been lying on the floor in the same position for fifteen minutes.

“he’s a good singer,” taehyung continues, jimins feet in his lap, “he’s funny. he’s good-looking. he has nice arms. seriously, if you don’t go for it, i might snatch him.”

“you don’t have a chance,” jimin says, and laughs as taehyung shoves at him.

“why are you telling me all this,” yoongi says, “it’s not like i didn’t know. i know.”

he feels namjoon’s fingertips against his. he doesn’t see him, but he knows it’s namjoon.

“he’s a good kid,” namjoon says, in his calm, even tone, “ask him for a coffee. give it a try.”

“ah,” yoongi says, and stares at the cracks in the ceiling.




he’s been staring at his phone screen for at least five minutes straight. namjoon had jungkook’s contact information because he tutors him, and he saved it into yoongi’s phone when he wasn’t looking. jeon jungkook, it reads above his number. not Athletic Guy. not Guy Who’s Trying To Kill Me. his name is jeon jungkook. does he even know yoongi’s name? have his friends mentioned yoongi to him? does he even remember yoongi anymore?

yoongi supposes there’s only one way to find out. he types, hey, i don’t know if you remember me, but i’m the guy you’ve nearly killed on numerous occasions on campus, and i was thinking that you should finally own up to it, and then erases it and retypes the same thing. he stares at the message for one more minute. quick and painless, he thinks, hits send, and then promptly throws his phone across the room. luckily, it hits his bed, bounces but doesn’t fall off. a second later, it dings.

yoongi would be lying if he said he’s not nervous at all as he opens the message from jungkook.

jeon jungkook [7:38]
let me get this straight - are you actually mad at me? ;;

yoongi’s coming off as an asshole again, but what else is new.

“come on,” he says to himself, biting at his lower lip as he types a reply. 

yoongi [7:40]
no, i’m really not 

jeon jungkook [7:41]
oh, whew
i was thinking you weren’t but i wanted to make sure
i’m not intentionally trying to take you out, hahaha
at least not the assassination way

yoongi’s breath hitches. he reads the text multiple times. either there’s the implication he wants to take yoongi out on a date, or yoongi’s crazy. 

yoongi [7:43]
that means you remember me? 

jeon jungkook [7:44]
you’re the cute black-haired guy from under the tree
and the music building amongst other places
god that was embarrassing i’m so sorry

yoongi feels a smile tug at his lips.

yoongi [7:44]
it was good
i mean yeah it was embarrassing but you’re also good 

jeon jungkook [7:45]
i’m so embarrassed ;;;; but thank you hahaha
i didn’t get your name?
oh and how did you get my number

yoongi [7:45]
i’m friends with namjoon, he tutors you? anyway, he gave it to me, i hope you don’t mind
my name is yoongi 

jeon jungkook [7:46]
hi yoongi!
my name is jungkook
and i don’t mind at all
i’m glad

yoongi lets out a long breath. he’s feeling giddy in a way he hasn’t felt in years. false hope, he reminds himself, but right now, he can’t stop smiling.

jeon jungkook [7:48]
so how can i make up for all the times i nearly killed you?

yoongi [7:49]

jeon jungkook [7:49]
deal. tomorrow?

yoongi [7:49]
i’m free after 3 

jeon jungkook [7:50]
at 3:30 then, at holmen?

yoongi [7:50]
sounds great 

jeon jungkook [7:51]
see you then :)




yoongi [8:30]

hobi [8:30]
holy shit i have never seen yoongi use an exclamation mark

jimin [8:30]

tae [8:30]

jin [8:31]
excited yoongi that is so cute my heart is melting AH

jimin [8:31]

tae [8:31]

hobi [8:31]
i bet hes got a date

jimin [8:31]

tae [8:31]

jin [8:31]




namjoon [8:52]
you asked him out?

yoongi [8:53]
we’re meeting for coffee
not a date namjoon 

namjoon [8:53]
not a date got it
hey im proud of you

yoongi [8:54]
he might not even like me 

namjoon [8:54]
he’ll like you
you know why?
because youre the best person i know



yoongi [8:55]

namjoon [8:55]
love you too

yoongi [8:55]
yeah yeah love you




it’s not a date. he’s just finally properly meeting someone he’s been running into for the past three months in a series of near-death experiences. it’s just manners that they should at least properly introduce themselves.

yoongi arrives at the café at 3:25. he’s trying to decide whether he should wait outside or inside, when he hears his name being called.

“yoongi?” he turns, and jungkook is standing in front of him. he really is. right there. the guy yoongi has been, in hoseok’s words, pining over for months. looking more nervous than yoongi has ever seen him. wearing the damn beanie again.

jungkook bites at his lip, his face lighting up as he looks at yoongi. yoongi’s heart sort of, maybe, skips a beat.

“hi,” he says, “um.”

“hi, i’m jungkook,” jungkook says, even though yoongi already knew that, and then sort of hurries forward to stick his hand out to yoongi. it’s formal and needlessly polite and yoongi emits a surprised laugh, but takes it. jungkook squeezes tight.

“i feel like we’re sort of past this stage,” yoongi says, “given the amount of times you’ve almost knocked me out.”

jungkook gives a breathy laugh. there’s a pink tint high on his cheeks.

“you’re right. let’s just go in. i’m buying since this is my chance at making up.”

yoongi is going to order a normal hot coffee, but jungkook urges him to get something fancier, so he orders off the christmas flavor menu, if only to make him happy. he likes the way jungkook’s grin is wide and open.

“yoongi?” jungkook says once they are sat at the table. he looks comfy, nestled against the wall in his big, thick hoodie, hands wrapped around the hot drink. “tell me about yourself?”

and yoongi’s not good at talking about himself, but he tries, and jungkook listens intently, like he’s trying to press it all into his memory. yoongi finds himself stumbling with his words in places; sometimes he gets distracted by some detail he hasn’t noticed before because he usually tactically retreats after two minutes of proximity, like how long his eyelashes are, or the barely-there scar on his cheek, or the small noise he makes after taking a sip of his coffee.

jungkook wants to know about how yoongi came to contact him, so yoongi tells him; tells him most of it, omitting the part where he complained to his friends about how attractive jungkook was for three months straight and had a breakdown at namjoon’s kitchen table.

“turns out you already know all my friends,” he says, grimacing, “they’ll definitely try to tell you stuff about me. i want you to remember that they are liars.”

“got it,” jungkook laughs. then he quietens down, biting at his lip through his grin. “if you were to meet yugyeom, he’d tell you all the embarrassing things i’ve said to him about you. he wouldn’t even hesitate.”

“what kind of things?” yoongi asks against his better judgement.

“don’t laugh,” jungkook says. “he, uh. he knows you as Cute Bedhead Guy.”

jungkook looks as red as yoongi probably is. he attempts to casually cover his face with his sleeves. jungkook laughs softly. it sounds nice, it sounds right in yoongi’s ears.




“so tell me,” yoongi says as they are leaving the café what must be some two hours later, “how come you’re good at everything?”

“not everything,” jungkook says, “just the things i have worked for.”

it’s an honest answer and yoongi realizes he probably gets it a lot. people dismissing his hard work and chalking it up to natural talent or luck.

“it’s really admirable,” he says, and jungkook looks genuinely happy, ducking his face shyly and smiling down at his feet, and yoongi is a little bit in love.

the back of his mind is going off about false hope again, but yoongi pushes it back, this time, letting himself just feel happy, feel comfortable in jungkook’s company, because jungkook seems happy to be with yoongi, too.

“i don’t really... want to go home yet,” jungkook says as they walk. yoongi doesn’t miss the way he glances at him. “are you busy?”

“no,” yoongi says so quickly he very nearly cringes at himself. when he looks at jungkook, he’s smiling at him.

“let’s just walk?”

it’s getting darker and the streetlights are lit. there might actually be snow soon. although it’s gradually getting colder, yoongi doesn’t mind. he keeps stealing glances at jungkook under the streetlights. the lighting suits him. yoongi’s pretty sure every lighting suits him.

“three hours into the date and i haven’t accidentally almost killed you once,” jungkook muses, “i think it’s going well.”

yoongi feels actual fucking butterflies in his stomach at the word date.

“you just jinxed it,” he manages, and that’s the exact moment when jungkook trips, his hands flying up, his arm connecting with yoongi’s face.

in the end, jungkook doesn’t even fall, but he spins around to face yoongi, looking absolutely panicked, and at first yoongi doesn’t get why. he hit yoongi in the face, but yoongi’s so numb from the cold he barely even felt anything.

“i’m so sorry,” jungkook’s saying, “yoongi, shit. are you okay? fuck, i’m so sorry.”

yoongi doesn’t get why jungkook’s so freaked out.

“i’m fine,” he says, and then he finally feels something drip down his chin. he tastes blood. he brings a hand to his chin, and it comes off wet with blood. oh.

“shit, shit,” jungkook keeps saying, looking through his pockets frantically, “i jinxed it. shit.”

“it’s just a nosebleed,” yoongi says, and then has a tissue shoved into his face. jungkook leans in close, his other hand coming up to the side of yoongi’s face as he tries to wipe off the blood, cold fingertips gentle against his skin. his eyes are big and wide with worry, and he’s biting at his lip so hard it looks like it hurts.

“i’m so - fuck, don’t hate me,” he says, and yoongi doesn’t. what he does is this:

he closes a hand around jungkook’s wrist, the one holding the tissue, pulls it away from his face, leans forward, and kisses him.

jungkook freezes. with half-lidded eyes, yoongi sees jungkook’s eyes flutter shut. it’s chaste, just the brief touch of their lips, but yoongi’s heart is pounding in his chest. when they pull apart, jungkook opens his eyes slowly.

“you taste like blood,” he says, looking a little bit dazed.

“sorry,” yoongi says, and then doesn’t say any more, because jungkook leans in and kisses him again.




yoongi [10:49]
[image attached] 

jin [10:50]
wtf yoongi did you get into a fight

jimin [10:50]
omfg what happened
he tried to kill you again didnt he

hobi [10:50]
you both look so happy even with all that blood on your face

yoongi [10:51]
he punched me in the face 

jin [10:51]

tae [10:51]
but youre happy about it?

yoongi [10:52]
then we kissed 

jimin [10:52]

tae [10:52]

jin [10:52]

hobi [10:52]
how was the date!!!!!!
is it over

yoongi [10:53]
hes still at my apartment
we came back here because he wanted to take care of the nosebleed
we watched a movie and now hes asleep on the couch 

tae [10:54]

jimin [10:54]
taehyung is broken

jin [10:54]
yoongi and jungkook are a thing!!!!!!

jimin [10:55]
i knew it from the start

hobi [10:55]
congrats yoongi!!!

yoongi [10:56]
he is so

jin [10:56]
i mgoing to cry

hobi [10:56]
im so happy for u guys

jimin [10:57]
im so fond

jin [10:57]

tae [10:57]




namjoon [11:13]

yoongi [11:15]

namjoon [11:15]

yoongi [11:15]

namjoon [11:15]

yoongi [11:16]




yoongi’s not actually strong enough to carry jungkook to the bed, and he doesn’t want to risk waking him up, so he drags a blanket and pillows from the bedroom and tries to make him comfortable on the couch. then he lies awake in bed until two a.m. and thinks about how surreal today was. the date started with coffee and ended with jungkook shoving rolled up tissue up his nose and laughing at him. they kissed again during the movie, and yoongi felt like he was floating. jungkook fell asleep against his shoulder before the credits rolled. despite getting excessive nosebleed halfway through it, it was the best date yoongi has ever had, and technically, it’s still not over. it’s harder to fall asleep when he knows jungkook’s sleeping in the living room, but he does, eventually.

“yoongi?” he blinks his eyes open at the sound of the voice and knuckles against the doorframe. he yawns, stretches.

“what time is it?” he asks, his state of consciousness lying somewhere between sleep and awake.

“it’s early. i’m sorry i just fell asleep last night, but thanks for letting me stay over, anyway.” yoongi manages to focus his eyes. jungkook is standing in the doorway, clad in a white t-shirt that has a speck of yoongi’s blood on the collar from last night. jungkook looks sleepy, his hair messy.

because yoongi is still half-asleep and feeling bold, he reaches past the edge of the bed, his fingers curling lazily, and says,

“come here."

“huh?” jungkook blinks.

“’s too early to wake up. you can fit in the bed. if you want.”

he blinks sleepily, watches as jungkook draws in a breath and bites at his lip. hopes that he wants.

“yeah,” jungkook says, stepping into the room. he walks around the bed, and yoongi feels it dip under his weight. there’s rustling as jungkook settles under the blanket. their feet touch, and neither of them moves away. yoongi’s eyes close involuntarily.

“hey,” he murmurs, “this has been one long ass date.”

behind him, jungkook laughs softly.


“i don’t mind, though,” yoongi says. he feels jungkook settling closer, his body heat ghosting against yoongi’s back. jungkook hums and presses his forehead against the nape of yoongi’s neck.

“me neither.”




tae [5:13]
hey i realized yoongi and jungkook have been dating for a month and kooks still not in this gc
im gonna add him

[tae has added jungkook to the group chat]

jimin [5:14]
hey kookie!!!!!!!!

jungkook [5:15]
hey guys!!!!!!!!

namjoon [5:15]
welcome to HellTM

jungkook [5:15]
thanks im glad to be here
in hell i guess

jin [5:15]
hey kook come over this weekend we can make food and tell stories

yoongi [5:16]
excuse me why are you immediately asking my boyfriend to come over wtf 

jin [5:16]
i just think there are a lot of stories to share here
lots of things he should know about you

jungkook [5:17]
yes i want to know

yoongi [5:17]
dont trust them 

hobi [5:18]
trust us :)

namjoon [5:18]
that smiley face is terrifying hoseok

tae [5:19]
hey jungkook theres this one video of yoongi you should see

[yoongi has deleted tae from the group]