Work Header

You Have 487 New Messages (Or, In Which Sherlock Holmes Starts a Grouptext)

Chapter Text

15 March 2018

GL: Sherlock, pick up your mobile

GL: I’ve got a case for you

GL: It’s a good one

GL: John, trying you too

GL: Since His Majesty is ignoring me

GL: Where are you two???

MrsH: I’m out shopping haven’t seen them all day xx

MoH: I picked Rosie up from Baker Street about an hour ago

MoH: We’re having a girls night in!

MoH: They didn’t say they were going anywhere

MoH: Is it really a good case?

GL: [Photo - CrimeScene1.jpg -  15.3.2018 18:39]

MrsH: Well that’s certainly something

MrsH: How do you think he got up there?

GL: No idea

GL: That’s why I’m trying to get Sherlock to come take a look

GL:Take a look at the photo, Sherlock!  It’s a 7 at least!

MoH: Looks like he bled for quite a while

MoH: From this angle at least

GL: Yes I thought so too

MoH: He must have been up there for some time!  And nobody noticed?

GL: [Photo - CrimeScene2.jpg -  15.3.2018 18:44]

MrsH: So you think he came through the window then?

GL: What?  No, the door

GL: Seems unlikely that he’d have climbed up the side of the building in that state

MoH: Is there blood by the door, though?  Looks clean to me

MrsH: Yes that’s exactly what I thought

GL: [Photo - CrimeScene3.jpg -  15.3.2018 18:49]

GL: Nope not that I can see

GL: All right we’re checking the footage

GL: And I was wondering how nobody noticed a man bleeding to death wandering around the building

GL: But the window?  Really?

MrsH: Well as Sherlock always says

MrsH: When the impossible has been eliminated and so on

MH: Might I suggest checking the ground floor on the other side of the building?

MH: It may provide additional information about the likelihood of his having made the climb before his untimely death.

GL: [Photo - CrimeScene4.jpg -  15.3.2018 19:02]

GL: This is the other side of the building - same as the one he’s on

MoH: Hang on

MoH: It’s not exactly the same

MoH: Is that a window washing setup near the roof?

MrsH: Of course!  He was a window washer!

MrsH: We should have known!

GL: Really?  You think so?

MH: It would explain his unlikely ascent.

GL: Christ

GL: All right

GL: We’re contacting the window washing company now

GL: Update: two of their employees never brought their van back to HQ today

GL: We’re searching for the other now - he’s probably the killer.

GL: Thanks for your help everyone!

GL: I’m going to sack Sherlock and replace him with this grouptext

MrsH: Haha!  He won’t like that


JW: Lots of excitement here this evening, sorry we missed it

SH: Yes, it’s reassuring, as a citizen of London, to hear that a high-ranking detective, a medical examiner, a government official, and a drug lord’s widow can together solve one simple murder.

MoH: Oh hush you

GL: Yeah, no giving us a hard time when you were MIA

GL has changed Baker Street Tech Help Line to Sherlock Holmes: Not Quite The World’s ONLY Consulting Detective

GL: Where were you two anyway?  I must’ve rung you ten times

SH: Dinner

JW: Client

JW: That is

JW: We had dinner with a client

MrsH: Dinner with a client?

MrsH: Really?

JW: Yeah we do that

JW: Sometimes

MH: How interesting.

JW: Well done solving the case everyone!