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You Have 487 New Messages (Or, In Which Sherlock Holmes Starts a Grouptext)

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8 August 2017

GL: So what ever happened to last week’s date, John?  Another date anytime soon???

JW: You do know you can just text me things like this directly

GL: Yeah, but then you’d have to have the same conversation with everybody

GL: Waste of time

GL: I’m looking out for you, really

JW: Lucky me

GL has changed The Bachelor Viewing Party to The Bachelor Recaps

MrsH: Ooh do tell!

MoH: Yes, we all want to hear!  

SH: Frankly I’m more interested in the liver waiting for me in the freezer.

GL: Well you don’t have to read along then

JW: There’s nothing to tell really

JW: It was nice to catch up with her

JW: And to get out a bit

SH: You get out all the time.  We went out today.

JW: We went to the morgue

JW: Bit different

JW: No offense Molly

MoH: Oh none taken!

MoH: So are you seeing her again?  

SH: Our trip to the morgue was very satisfactory.  I got my liver after all.

JW: She lives in Yorkshire  

JW: So I don’t think so

MrsH: Too bad dear

MrsH: Someone closer to home next time perhaps?

SH: It’s a particularly diseased one which is always quite useful.  

JW: Perhaps

GL: Ah well, better luck next time

SH: The liver’s owner clearly had a gambling problem.

MoH: How could you possibly know that from his liver?

GL: There’s a new social worker my department’s liaising with who you might like

GL: Want an introduction?

SH: [Photo - Liver 1 of 6.jpg -  8.8.2017 17:19]

MrsH: Oh Sherlock you’ve put me right off my tea with that

JW: Thanks for the offer, Greg, but I don’t have much time for dating anyway

JW: Sherlock please tell me you’re not going to send five more photos of that liver

SH: [Photo - Liver 2 of 6.jpg -  8.8.2017 17:22]

JW: Right, I’m going to go take away his phone

GL: Much appreciated mate