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Tight Spaces

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"Rodney? Rodney, speak to me."

"Sheppard? Oh, thank God. Get me out of here!"

"Don't worry. We've got your lifesign; we're on the way."

"They Buried. Me. Alive! They freakin' – ."

"McKay, stay with me here. We're coming to get you. Just hang tight."

"Hang tight? That's a joke right? Funny, ha ha? Forgive the concussed man here, but drooling cavemen bashed me on the head – unprovoked, mind you - and buried me in a six-foot box! Believe me, it's TIGHT!"

"Dr. McKay, you must calm down. Remember the breathing exercises I taught you."

"Breathing… right. I can breathe. Sure. Buried underground - tight space – makes for a limited air supply. Just, just got to breathe, and stop talking."

"We're almost there, McKay; you'll have enough air to talk all you want. Just picture those nice, clear blue skies. Wide open spaces."

"Oh, you and your stupid blue skies! Not all of us are pilots!"


"Right, right. Wide open spaces. Wide open spaces. Oh my god, I'm going to die. I haven't even won the Nobel yet. I've got experiments - "

"Shut up, McKay. We're here."

"If you say so, seeing as how I can't see anything. Honestly, what kind of torture is it to bury a man alive with his radio?"

"We can stop talking if that is what you prefer?"

"What? Who said that? No, no – talking is good. Okay, calm down. Wide open spaces. You know, I've never been very good with tight spaces. I know, you'd be surprised. Claustrophobia – it's a very unpleasant experience. Jeannie used to lock me up in closets when we were little and she wanted to play with my chemistry sets. Of course I always got out. What's a lock when you're a genius, right? Right? Oh, God, I'm going to die."

"You're not going to die, McKay."

"No, of course not, because you're going to get me out of here. As in now, right? Seriously, tell me you're going to get here soon, because – ah, what was that?!"

"What, that?"

"Yes, that, Sheppard. Stop messing around!"

"That, McKay, is the sound of shovels removing the dirt over your head. We're right above you. You'll be free soon."

"Oh, that's good. Much better than the ground caving in and burying me further. Hey, wait, where'd you get the shovels?"

"Bad guys left them after I scared them off."

"Oh. Good...?"

"Sheppard wouldn't let me kill them for you."

"Sheppard… what? Look, I don't care! Just get me out of here! Oh, God, I can feel something moving on my leg. Get off! You stupid – get me out of here! SHEPPARD!"

"We're almost there. Just hold on!"

"Oh God. I can't breathe. I can't – "

"Rodney, you must remain calm."

"I can't. I can't."

"McKay, talk to me buddy… dammit McKay, talk to me! We can see the box; just hold on another minute. Hold on."


"I see him!"


"I got you, buddy."