roguecryptid



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Nervous about the mechanics of blowing off steam with a human, Garrus seeks advice about the bane of xeno-loving turians throughout the galaxy— how is this kissing thing supposed to work, especially when you’ve got no lips?

    Language:
    English
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    3,854
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    25 May 2022

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Truth is, the first time Shepard gets Garrus's clothes off, she's not quite sure how to react. Written for the ME Kinkmeme.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    637
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    75
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    24 May 2022

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    "Hey." Ed reaches across because it's the only thing that feels right. He grasps Stede's wrist and smoothes the pad of his thumb across his knuckles. Stede stops fiddling with his ring and looks up at him, wide-eyed. "This isn't Captain shit. This is God shit. Are you God?"

    The room is blank with silence.

    Gently, Ed repeats, "Are you God, Stede?"

    Stede's voice is thin and high when he answers, "I'm not God."

    "And is God here, in this room?"

    Comically, Stede looks around like he might find God perched on the edge of his desk, or pulling books from his shelves to examine the spines.

    "He's not," Stede concedes.

    "That's right, mate. Stupid bugger doesn't associate himself with pirates."

     

    Or: The Revenge has been becalmed for six days. Ed has bigger things to worry about, like sharks and being in love.

    Language:
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    268
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    04 Apr 2022

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “The fuck?” Ed manages, instantly getting his foot stuck in a nearby bucket.

    “Sh-shh!” Stede pushes two fingers against his lips to shut him up.

    Ed goes still and a bit cross-eyed, staring down at the hand on his mouth. Stede moves it away, with a mouthed “sorry!” focusing intently on the sounds outside the shed instead.

    In the alley, hurried steps and shouting voices rush past; they catch fragments of: “Where the fuck did they go then?” or “Keep looking!” and even “The short one looks like a bloody birthday cake, how do you lose that—”

    Language:
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    4,236
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    1/1
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    768
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    01 Apr 2022

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    After Izzy leaves, and Stede gets patched up, Ed uses the bathtub for something other than a nervous breakdown.

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    2,365
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    24 Mar 2022