qirezade

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  1. Public Bookmark 66

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    Summary

    Nie Huaisang develops a crush on Lan Xichen when he's studying at the Cloud Recesses, just like every other disciple his age. As the years pass, no matter what he goes through, he can't seem to shake his feelings. Fortunately, he's been able to keep it a secret, so at least Lan Xichen will never find out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,917
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    43
    Kudos:
    322
    Bookmarks:
    66
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    1824

    17 Jul 2020

    Bookmarker's Notes

    He thinks of how it feels to hold Nie Huaisang, how good it is to have his uninhibited trust when he lets himself fall apart in Lan Xichen’s arms. He imagines what it would be like to steal him away from the Unclean Realm and all his duties, to bring him back to the Cloud Recesses and dote on him like he’s a treasured pet. He likes the idea of pulling Nie Huaisang into his lap, of scenting the cologne he wears, of pressing his mouth to Nie Huaisang’s throat and hearing the shaky little exhales he would make. The same ones he makes sometimes when he is very drunk and Lan Xichen strokes his hair. Lan Xichen feels a fresh pulse of heat as he realizes that if Jin Guangyao is right, maybe those sounds aren’t completely innocent.

    He realizes he is trembling and he tries to take deep, calming breaths. What he needs is a long soak in the cold spring. After that…well, he can think about that later.

  2. Public Bookmark 8

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    Summary

    Miya Osamu grows up in the company of background noise.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,231
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    73
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    541

    21 Jun 2020

    Bookmarker's Notes

    In the end, it is you and him against the entire world, even when you are not standing beside him as you conquer it together. But like you said, it is for the best. Here is you, trying your hardest to be the happier one. Here are both of you, Osamu and Atsumu, happier.

  3. Public Bookmark 8

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    Summary

    Song Lan is not sentimental.

    or, what happens, afterwards.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,378
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    177

    20 Jun 2020

    Bookmarker's Notes

    But all scars fade. He’s hoping the memory of the four faded lines on his cheek won’t, not just yet, please.

    +

    It had been a genuine query in the first few years, but thirty five years makes rice into wine and makes little questions like are you going to leave, and roam the world again into inside jokes shared between two out-of-place people. He expects Song Lan to laugh mutely, or shake his head, but it does not feel right on this nice night. 
    He flicks the words off the talisman. The moon is huge and round above their heads. 
    Perhaps I shall. 
    It is a nice night, after all. 

  4. Public Bookmark 5

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    Summary

    Song Lan reflects on what Xiao Xingchen is, what he feels like to him and how - despite his best hopes - an ending always looms on sight.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,759
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    141

    13 Jun 2020

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Sincerity was a commodity in the politics of the Cultivation world but Xiao Xingchen shared his generously, unthinking of the consequences.

  5. Public Bookmark 4

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    Summary

    Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen think about what they have lost. Also, a memory.

    Set post-Baixue temple massacre.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,498
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    91

    13 Jun 2020

    Bookmarker's Notes

    He pinched his eyes shut as they began to well with tears. He cried. It hurt. He felt his sobs echo throughout his entire body. He buried his face deep in his arms as he felt his body tense and shake, warm tears made cool on his face by the occasional breeze.

    He missed his friend. He missed his master. He missed and he missed and he missed. Where was he to put all this ache? This loneliness? It leaked out of him, unable to be held inside.

    Biting his lower lip, he lifted his head again. The moon’s rays seemed blurry through his wet eyes. He blinked them over, and it was clear again.