probablynothuman
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And Other Fun Free Time Activities: A Memoir by Dirk Strider
The game's over. Universe created, quest completed, mortal vessel resoundingly sublimated—time to figure out what to do with the rest of his life. Get his shit together and start making smart, rational decisions? Hopefully. Maybe. If he really puts his heart and soul into it.
Oh, who is he kidding. He's a fucking disaster.
(Or, the one in which Dirk and John fall in love and nobody is straight, ever.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 59,531
- Chapters:
- 15/18
- Comments:
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- Kudos:
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- Bookmarks:
- 265
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Bookmarked by probablynothuman
15 May 2017
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Karkat is planning the proposal to end all proposals, but a clueless Dave has plans of his own.
Series
- Part 4 of Choose your own Epilogue
Bookmarked by probablynothuman
15 May 2017
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TT: Wait a moment.
TT: Dave, what’s that on your face?
TG: what are you talking about
EB: uh wow now that you mention it.
EB: dave is that… blood?Rose starts taking notice of Dave’s questionable home environment. Dave wishes she would stop blowing things out of proportion.
Bookmarked by probablynothuman
13 May 2017
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- Words:
- 2,294
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 7
Bookmarked by probablynothuman
05 May 2017
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not good
How do you tell your childhood best friend that you like to take it in the ass and bathe in rivers of alien ejaculate? Not, like, in a gay way, but like. In a bisexual way. But not like in the bisexual way where you like dicks and you like vaginas, but more in the bisexual way where you’re happy with whatever’s down there but are now incredibly, incredibly attached to a specific particularly ineffable set of wriggly alien genitals? You know, like, in a way that involves absolutely none of those actual words for the easy digestion of a simple not-a-homosexual?
Bookmarked by probablynothuman
03 May 2017