The problem with roommates, David has decided, is the illusion of privacy.
“Thanks for… checking in.”
“Of course,” Patrick replies as he pulls away from the curb, but his expression softens. “What are business partners for?”
David scrunches his nose and pops another candy in his mouth. “I don’t think it’s cleaning up after non-work-related, near-emotional breakdowns.”
“Well, we’ve been approved, but the grant money hasn’t come through yet, so… we’re technically not business partners,” he murmurs with a crooked smile. “Let’s just say it’s one friend looking out for another.”
Or, what if Patrick had been in 'Sebastien Raine'?
The first thing the internet told Patrick was to go to hospital. He knew he should go. But he also knew he couldn't drive himself, not with something lodged in his ass. And there's no way he's going to involve Ray in this mess. He briefly thought of Stevie, but they'd only met the day before and texting someone you barely know to come help you dislodge something out of your ass isn't exactly a great first impression. Which left... David.
"I can't." Patrick said to the empty room. "David can't know about this."
Patrick got something stuck in his ass one night. He calls on the only person he knows in Schitt's Creek, who happens to also be his new business partner and the man he wants more than anything, David.
Patrick's worried that David will get tired of waiting so long to have "real sex" with him. David has a different definition of "real sex."
“Okay,” David says again, taking a breath and nodding his head quickly as if to reassure himself that they will somehow get through this baffling situation. “Let’s start with the first part of your statement,” he tries, attempting to parse the words in his head as he says them out loud. “You said I could be having real sex, moments after you literally swallowed my dick.”
“Well, not literally…”
Take a deep breath, and start at the beginning. Tell them how we first met. Tell them that this — that this has to be one of the happiest days of my life.
“I’m David Rose, for those that don’t know. I’m Patrick’s best man and um, best friend? Which you may not have guessed due to the fact I nearly missed the ceremony. Um, anyway… this, this is one of the happiest days of my life.”
Bookmarked by oh_precious_love
13 Nov 2021