kurotsuru



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    "What?" says Shang Qinghua. "No, he's not. Why would he court me? He thinks I'm like, a hamster."

    "Okay, then why is he dropping like, monsters and shit at your door?" says Cucumber-bro. "That's how they like, show people they can provide for them or whatever."

    "Why would they do that!" shrieks Shang Qinghua. "I never --"

    "It was a plot point, dude," says Cucumber-bro, in the slow, patient voice of someone speaking to a stupid dog. "It was an actual, literal plot point you typed in with your own like, sinful hands."

    "No it wasn't," says Shang Qinghua immediately. "I think I would like, fucking remember writing a scene where some chick gets an actual fucking dragon corpse dropped on her door and immediately gives it up for the person who brought it!"

    Series
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    09 Dec 2019

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  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Mobei Jun doesn't understand Youtube, but ends up famous on it anyway.

    Or: Shang Qinghua is a paranormal Youtuber, and the most infamous cryptid of them all keeps showing up in the background of his shots.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,237
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    09 Dec 2019

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    It was almost as if Mobei Jun, Lord of the Northern Demon Realm and right-hand man to Demon King Luo Binghe, was trying to — no! Absolutely not! It couldn’t be!

    If Shang Qinghua didn’t know any better, he would think this was Mobei Jun trying to gain his favor!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,903
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    1/1
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    Comments:
    39
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    248
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    09 Dec 2019

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  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Stroke of Midnight is a hero run company that manufactures sex toys made from casts of the appendages of heroes.

    Deku is a hero lover who posts videos of himself masturbating with said sex toys.

    Ground Zero is a hero obsessed with said videos.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,512
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    189
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    3805
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    04 Dec 2019

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  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “Sometimes when Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu make love-” Shang Qinghua thinks of the right way to phrase it, drawing on his extensive experience- “Shen Qingqiu’s heavenly pillar descends to Luo Binghe’s ravine, if you understand me,” he says, moving his eyebrows in a way that is meant to convey deep meaning.

    Mobei-Jun does not make an expression of understanding, but he’s watching Shang Qinghua very, very closely.

    “Shang Qinghua,” he says. “You want to be inside me?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,373
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    814
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    137
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    29 Nov 2019

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