Recent works
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a round trip ticket to a blue planet by confused_android
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
01 Jan 2021
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Todd thinks he gets Mona, just a little bit.
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amuse-bouche by confused_android
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
27 Nov 2020
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The smoke detector goes off when Todd is in the shower.
"Shit," he curses, fumbling for the faucet. There's still conditioner in his hair and soap running down his chest, but he doesn't want to let the apartment catch fire just to rinse off. He snags the towel on the way out the bathroom door, and slides into the kitchen.
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boys, what you're hopin' for will come true by confused_android
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
21 Nov 2020
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"We need a group costume," Tina says, leaning close to the camera and pointing menacingly at all three of the folks on the Seattle end. "If I'm flying all the way out to you guys for one lousy party, we need a theme."
"Muppets?" Dirk suggests. He'd just discovered them a few weeks earlier, and feels very confident in his ability to sew felt.
"No," Farah says. "Absolutely not."
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honey, the look of it was as sweet as the sound by confused_android
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
25 Sep 2020
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Todd is an asshole, he knows this about himself – even with Dirk's pep talk in the woods more than a year ago, all he can do is to try his best to suppress his natural asshole-ish instincts. He knows he's going to fuck up eventually, and hates that he knows that Dirk will forgive him when he does. His first response to every tough situation is to lash out or walk away; it's only with great effort that he makes the right decision, continues to support Dirk, works the cases until their close. He's an asshole.
Dirk knows this about Todd, and knows that it makes Todd an incredibly good and brave person.
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red and yellow and green and brown and blue by confused_android
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
13 Aug 2020
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"They're lovely," Dirk says simply, his fingers skimming over the garments. Some have bows, some have lace; some are sheer, and others are more practical. There are pairs of all colors of the rainbow – a few are all colors at once (and one of those says 'PRIDE' on the back in glittery letters). "I didn't know they made pants in so many – so many options!"
"Uh, do you mean panties?"
"No," he replies, horrified. "I hate that word. They're 'pants'."---
Dirk discovers the power of a good pair of underwear and a healthy sense of self-esteem.
Recent bookmarks
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Team Building Exercises For a Harmonious Workplace by Prim_the_Amazing for aunt_zelda
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
16 Nov 2020
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“Oh, no,” Sasha says, in a horrified, delighted sort of way.
“Okay, now I’ve gotta see this,” Tim says, getting up as well.
Martin gets close enough to see the title printed out on the cover in big, blocky text. Team Building Exercises For a Harmonious Workplace.
Tim lets out a bark of laughter as soon as he comes close enough to see it. Jon is holding the book like it’s a piece of garbage he’d very much like to drop into the bin before going to wash his hands, touching it as little as possible.
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The Archives crew stumble across a Leitner.
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Bookmarked by confused_android
16 Jan 2021
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"I'm out of your life" doesn't happen, but it works out for the best.
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- English
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- 4,279
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Bookmarked by confused_android
15 Jan 2021
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The circumstances are these: Newt maybe fucked around with drift tech he found in (stole from) the trash that he shouldn’t have been fucking around with, and maybe things went a little haywire and Hermann, poor Hermann, who only wanted to check up on Newt when Newt didn’t meet him for dinner like they’d planned, got caught in the crossfire when things went from haywire to red alert crisis, and atoms or brainwaves or souls or something got scrambled and now Newt’s Hermann and Hermann’s Newt and they are, without a doubt, the only human beings alive this has ever happened to.
How fucking cool.
(or: newt and hermann get a little freaky friday and then have some fun with it)
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- English
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- 5,954
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Bookmarked by confused_android
01 Jan 2021
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5 Times the Raptors Tried to Kill Miriam, and 1 Time They Didn’t by JulisCaesar
Fandoms: Jurassic Park (Movies)
12 Nov 2015
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Miriam thought the job working for InGen sounded perfect. Tropical island, good pay, first dibs on publications… At least, she thought so until she found out that she was the only behaviorist on staff. Once the eggs hatched, it became all she could do to keep up–with the dinosaurs, the science, and her health.
- Language:
- English
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- 22,937
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- 6/6
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- 3
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Bookmarked by confused_android
22 Dec 2020
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When They Said Repent (I Wonder What They Meant). by Lanna Michaels (lannamichaels)
Fandoms: Welcome to Night Vale
26 Aug 2013
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Night Vale, have you ever felt deeply that everyone around you was wrong and should feel terrible for it?
- Language:
- English
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- 1,118
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- 1/1
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- 1
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- 10
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- 120
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- 12
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- 1943
Bookmarked by confused_android
13 Dec 2020