1 - 20 of 1525 Works in What We Do in the Shadows (TV)

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Guillermo and Nandor depart on their trip to see the world and visit Nandor's homeland of Al-Quolindar. Unfortunately, things don't always go as planned as they find themselves caught up in the middle of yet another scheme and they find they only have each other to depend on.

    Set immediately after the season 3 finale.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,944
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    58
    Kudos:
    183
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    2470
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Jenna never left the house. She’s been invisible the whole time—and she has seen things.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,240
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    24
    Hits:
    79
  3. Tags
    Summary

    takes place immediately after the s3 finale. Now that they're stuck together with a one way ticket to London, Guillermo and Nadja are forced to bond, and Guillermo must impersonate a vampire to get Nadja in good with the Worldwide Vampiric Council.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,432
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    435
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Abraham van Helsing is yet to decide if he wants to kill the infamous count Dracula or fuck him first. Possibly both.

    Vlad Tepes, aka the infamous count Dracula, is yet to decide if he's terrified of the stakes that jab his clothes and pin him to the wall – or extremely aroused by the same things. Possibly both.

    👀
    Or how a famous, if eccentric, academic becomes an even more famous vampire-hunter(/fucker).

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,278
    Chapters:
    9/12
    Comments:
    39
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    690
  5. Tags
    Summary

    " Guillermo met his eyes across the courtyard, and for a moment the human was grave and resolute as a warrior in battle, resigned to his fate yet defiant to its circumstances. For a moment Nandor imagined this meeting as the start of a war rather than a courtship, and for that moment he felt as if he'd found his footing again.

    But then the human had done something outrageous.

    Then the human had smiled. "

    In the end, when all was said and done, the marriage of Nandor the Relentless and Guillermo de la Cruz would be remembered as a pivotal and defining moment in the history of human and vampiric society alike.

    In the beginning, however, it was mostly just a mess.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    114,714
    Chapters:
    58/?
    Comments:
    2265
    Kudos:
    1814
    Bookmarks:
    370
    Hits:
    39506
  6. Tags
    Summary

    We catch up with the gang sometime during the Soil Incident. Except after all that international travel Guillermo is definitely going to need a raise. And to have a talk with Nandor.

    A vampire bodyguard and his vampire continuing their painfully slow waltz towards romance.

    (in other words, these two are getting together whether the universe likes it or not)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,602
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    139
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1288
  7. Tags
    Summary

    “Come on, roomies,” Colin Robinson interjects. “You’re just gonna keep having this argument over and over again — and believe me, I don’t really mind for now, it’s delicious, but eventually it will start to go stale. You really gotta get to the root of the problem.”

    “And what is that, Colin Robinson?”

    “You two just need to bone.”

    (Or, resolved sexual tension in the workplace.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,512
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    80
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    323
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Guillermo emerges from nine days of forced confinement at sea, only to find that Nandor has gone missing somewhere in Europe. Unknown dangers lurk around every corner, and now, Guillermo will have to rely on his wits, his slayer skills, and help from his dumbass roommates to track Nandor down. What could go wrong?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,741
    Chapters:
    2/21
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    256
  9. Tags
    Summary

    It had taken only a few days of skipping meals and sleeping until sundown and, yes, okay, draining the blood of a few insignificant servants, for his wives to start looking at him askance.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,315
    Chapters:
    1/6
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    64
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Nandor's acting a bit strange. Lucky for Guillermo, he's used to Nandor acting strange. And besides, this type of strange is rather... Cute.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,718
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    62
    Kudos:
    112
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1058
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “I’ll source blood for you. I-I’ll find blood for you, and in return, you won’t feed on anyone in Pearlwick. And you’ll keep telling this vampiric council that the blood here isn’t any good.”

    Nandor hums, deeply considering the proposition before giving Guillermo a fanged grin.

    “Very well, little human. We have a deal.”


    Guillermo is perfectly happy with his life. He's skilled in his magic classification, using his magic to run his own little cafe and help out the locals. He gets a bit lonely at times, rarely finding the time to take a break, but he doesn't mind. He likes his life just how it is, he keeps telling himself, in hopes that he'll convince himself it's true. Though, he supposes, a little break in routine might be nice...

    He's not sure how to feel when that break in routine takes the form of a very handsome vampire feeding on the locals.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,530
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    498
  12. Tags
    Summary

    "Owning a familiar is already a great deal more complicated than it once was," says Nandor. "There are so many rules! I mean, you don't even get to fuck them anymore because apparently that's just not appropriate behaviour for the workplace or something. But we follow all the rules, because..."

    He trails off as a loud scuffling noise comes from the open doorway. Guillermo's head pokes around the frame, one earbud hanging loose on its string. "Wait... what was that last bit?"

    Nandor sighs in exaggerated exasperation. "I was just telling the nice camera people all about how I've never fucked you, Guillermo! This cannot be news to you! Have you not noticed all the amazing restraint I have shown on your account? Have I ever fucked you? No! You'd remember if I had! My fucks are not forgettable!"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,564
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    238
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    1369
  13. Tags
    Summary

    “You’re the new blacksmith, right?” The baker says, stepping back behind the counter. Nandor dumbly follows him, watches rapt as he leans on an elbow, face turning in his palm. Coy.

    “Yes. You stopped by last week, I remember.” Nandor fumbles with his hands, looking around the little cafe. There’s barely anyone here. They can talk.

    “What did you think?”

    ========

    A new blacksmith comes to the pier, and Guillermo doesn't know what to do with himself. They take up a whirlwind situationship that gets complicated when he finds out the man is a vampire. Maybe it would be easier if Guillermo didn't want to be one so bad. Maybe it would be easier if they weren't falling in love with each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,751
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    76
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    628
  14. Tags
    Summary

    While on their excursion to the UK, Guillermo finds himself with an injury that can't be fixed with a bandage and an ice-pack. A stay in hospital confirms the diagnosis of both a concussion and temporary amnesia. Consequently shipped back to the Staten Island home by Nadja, Nandor finds a dazed and confused Guillermo on his doorstep.
    _

    "So, where do I sleep? Can I crash on a couch or something?”

    “Don't be silly, you have a bedroom, Guillermo. It is a little sad but I did not think that you would forget it… it is behind you, obscured by the curtain, there.” Nandor points to the open space under the stairs, fabric half-drawn to reveal a small desk and trunk bed. There are funny paintings pinned to the wall.

    “That’s very funny, Nandor, but even I can tell that’s just a closet."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,594
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    88
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    330
  15. Tags
    Summary

    A Van Helsing by birth, Guillermo has plenty of experience playing the innocent virgin as bait. But it's not like that's his only skill. It's not like he wants to be bitten or anything. He definitely doesn't have anything to fear from a vampire as hopelessly inept as Nandor the Relentless, his family's latest capture. Right?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,783
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    101
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    398
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Nandor is a vampire who’s been the pet (good for hunting and, well, sometimes other things) of a family of slayers for 170 years. Guillermo’s the talented but lonely slayer who ends up with Nandor when Nandor’s master decides he doesn’t want him anymore. There are some ups and downs.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,364
    Chapters:
    3/10
    Comments:
    65
    Kudos:
    104
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    821
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Guillermo remembers his own turning like it was yesterday. He doesn’t understand, sometimes, why Laszlo and Nadja seem to have vague memories of the past. He supposes, one hundred, two hundred, three hundred years in the future he’ll be the same way.

    Companion piece to Baked Into The Crust, which is recommended reading prior to this.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,222
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    29
    Hits:
    101
  18. Tags
    Summary

    The Staten Island Documentary Film Crew have returned: how is Laszlo holding up now that he's a dad?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    659
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    42
  19. Tags
    Summary

    “I knew from the moment I saw that fucking baby we were going to have a massive fucking problem. I mean, look at it.” Laszlo gestured to the deranged baby in the corner of the basement and the cameras followed, showcasing the little horror.

    An extrapolation on what Laszlo was thinking in the season 3 finale.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    513
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    15
    Hits:
    117
  20. Tags
    Summary

    A broken heart can be a dangerous weapon in the right hands.

    Nadja-centric, a bit of Nadja/Guillermo friendship, Nadja/Laszlo in later chapters. Runs in parallel to "Blessed with Beauty and Rage".

    ~ Dedicated to all the peasant girls out there. ~

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,757
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    256

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