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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Here we go again!

    I have no idea how long this one will be, but you know I'll keep writing until it's done.

    I wanted to do a fake dating AU, and this seemed like the perfect series to do it in.

    Hope you all like it!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,762
    Chapters:
    29/?
    Comments:
    480
    Kudos:
    389
    Bookmarks:
    40
    Hits:
    15339
  2. Tags
    Summary

    David Rose is a straight-laced business major and former heir to the Rose Empire. He’s licking his wounds in Schitt’s Creek after dumping his long-term fiancee and allowing his father’s business manager to run off with all their money.
    Patrick Brewer is a college dropout with a string of ex-boyfriends and a history of running away from his problems. He enrols in Elmdale College to finally finish his business degree and get his life on track.
    You can guess what happens next…

    It's a role reversal combined with a butterfly effect type thingy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,992
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    674
  3. Tags
    Summary

    New season, new ficlet collection! The goal is one short stand alone fall themed ficlet each day for the month of September. Most will be rated G or T with more mature ficlets tagged in the chapter titles and notes. Honestly just another excuse to write tooth-rotting fluff!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,817
    Chapters:
    19/30
    Comments:
    225
    Kudos:
    125
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    4000
  4. Tags
    Summary

    An alternate engagement story for David & Patrick.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,102
    Chapters:
    2/6
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    53
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    866
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Five years after David and Patrick’s wedding, Clint and Marcy decide to move to Schitt’s Creek. This time, David's not the only one who has to come to terms with his family.

    Story is complete, updates will be posted on Tuesdays and Saturdays

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    144,867
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    659
    Kudos:
    356
    Bookmarks:
    81
    Hits:
    9206
  6. Tags
    Summary

    The year is 2170. For two generations North America has been governed by a totalitarian regime that exercises its power through fear and violence. Most people live as Citizens who adhere to the law in order to survive, but an underground network of saboteurs also lives in hiding "off the grid."

    Patrick Brewer, model citizen, must decide which world he belongs to.

     

    Or: David and Patrick fall in love and save the world.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,795
    Chapters:
    7/12
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    30
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    497
  7. Tags
    Summary

    David and Patrick's relationship, as told by texts between David and Stevie. And sometimes as told by texts between Stevie and Patrick, as a treat.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,512
    Chapters:
    28/?
    Comments:
    288
    Kudos:
    414
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    10554
  8. Tags
    Summary

    They've been married for six years when Patrick asks for a divorce.

    "We're both miserable, David," he says with a sigh as he leans against the kitchen counter in the dark. "I love you, so much, but... I don't know how to make you happy anymore."

    David blinks at him, the alcohol still coursing through his system making it hard for him to absorb the words right away. "I'm happy," he mumbles.

    Patrick shakes his head. "No, you're not."

    ---

    One thing, David didn’t do one thing, and moved them to New York and let their marriage fall apart.

    But that wasn't supposed to happen.

    So Fate intervenes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,967
    Chapters:
    2/4
    Comments:
    94
    Kudos:
    104
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    1142
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Tragedy strikes the Roses. Patrick struggles to be there for David and his family, while giving them—and himself—the freedom to mourn in their own way. A story of grief, resilience, and the healing power of love.

    Warning for Major Character Death.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    909
    Chapters:
    1/10
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    55
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    486
  10. Tags
    Summary

    “Hi,”

    “Hi, my, my sister’s not here…” David said automatically, still trying to figure out the cash register. His response was based on past experience in general and the first time Patrick had stopped by the Apothecary, where Alexis had unashamedly thrown herself at Patrick and he had not seemed in the least bit interested but David was sure this was because he wash shy around women, although very confident generally.

    “I’m not here for your sister.” Patrick looked straight into David’s eyes and David almost felt as though it was into his soul.

    What was it about this guy that unnerved him so much? He felt as though no-one had ever looked at him like that before, he didn’t know what to make of Patrick Brewer.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,147
    Chapters:
    3/17
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    756
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “So Mutt dated both Twyla and Alexis?” Patrick asks, picking up the thread of their conversation.

    “Mmhmm,” David hums. “I think his type is just ‘chatty enough that I don’t have to talk’. Although,” he says, “Alexis turned out to be more than he bargained for. Which is kind of a family trait.”

    Patrick peers over at him and raises an eyebrow. “I don’t think you’re too much, David.”

    “Well,” David says, taking a gulp of his wine, “we are on day zero-point-five of fourteen, so you might want to withhold judgment for a few more days.”

    Or: The fluffy dystopian pandemic AU that precisely nobody asked for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,916
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    68
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    568
  12. Tags
    Summary

    David escapes to the Schitt family cabin for the weekend to spend his birthday popping a pill and crying himself to sleep after a Sandra and Julia marathon. He expects wine, crying, and getting mad at his family for inevitably forgetting his birthday. What he doesn't expect is meeting a disarmingly charming man camping up the road. Maybe it won't be such a bad birthday after all. There is some canon dialogue and some canon adjacent'ish things.

    This fic is complete and is rated E for Eventual Explicit Exploits in later chapters. I hope you enjoyed that alliteration as much as I did. I'll be posting a chapter a day until it's done.

    This fic was inspired by a photo of Noah Reid released a week or two ago from a film set. .

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,220
    Chapters:
    13/13
    Comments:
    390
    Kudos:
    284
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    6453
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Patrick Brewer has been in love with Alexis Rose since he was a kid. The son of the Roses' chauffeur and personal cook, Patrick has returned to the Rose estate, Rosebud Manor, after years of living abroad and may have finally caught the eye of the object of his obsession. That is, until David Rose makes an appearance and changes everything.

    An AU based on Sabrina.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,015
    Chapters:
    5/10
    Comments:
    124
    Kudos:
    92
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    1319
  14. Tags
    Summary

    When Eli had ruined his family’s life, leaving them essentially penniless, forcing them to move to Schitt’s Creek, David assumed he and Alexis would be sent to some respectable boarding school or one of those schools that had students sit in beanbags and gave grades in sticker form. So when they had been dropped off in front of Schitt’s Creek High School armed with tacky binders and canvas backpacks, he was mortified.

     

    The Roses wound up in Schitt's Creek when David and Alexis were in high school. They must now face the perils of public school and homecoming dances.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,971
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    56
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    352
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Eyes on the empty space where all the bars he’s ever been in keep their taps, he gives voice to something he’s been too afraid to say. Something he couldn’t even tell Rachel. “I don’t know what I want.”

    Patrick looks at David again. His gaze keeps returning to him, like he’s magnetized or something. He’s never watched someone this closely. When they made a drink, that is. At his old bar, the one a few blocks from their old apartment, most of the mixed drinks were half rum, half Coke.

    David slides the drink across the bar. “Then it might be time to find out.”

    ***

    Or, Patrick runs away to Toronto. David is the bartender--ahem, mixologist--at the bar he finds nearby.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,379
    Chapters:
    4/8
    Comments:
    156
    Kudos:
    140
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    2147
  16. Tags
    Summary

    David Rose insists he is done letting baseball players into his bed and his life.

    Of course, it would be easier to believe him if he could stop thinking about the cute but cocky catcher he met at his parents’ annual All-Star party.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,553
    Chapters:
    5/11
    Comments:
    219
    Kudos:
    216
    Bookmarks:
    60
    Hits:
    4442
  17. Tags
    Summary

    After 20 years in Schitt’s Creek, David Rose is practically native. The Roses had long ago lost hope that anyone vaguely resembling themselves would ever come to town…cue Patrick Brewer. Overachiever, Harvard MBA graduate, and one of the youngest business moguls Wall Street has ever seen. Well, before everything came crashing down.

    A role reversal AU, of sorts.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,398
    Chapters:
    2/12
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    564
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Stevie speaks first after she lets out a low whistle. “Wow. Do I want to know how that happened?”

    “How what happened, Stevie?”

    “How that happened, David. He was clearly on a date with you and you messed it all up being, you know, you!”

    What if Patrick panicked and bolted when Stevie joined their date?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    994
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    84
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    592
  19. Tags
    Summary

    After a hiking accident, David does his best to take care of Patrick and not let his anxiety get the best of him.

     

    -----------

    Can be read as a stand alone.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,036
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    100
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    658
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Welcome to Big Brother! 16 contestants must compete against each other for a chance to win $500,000 in a house wired with cameras and microphones, capturing their every move for a TV and Internet audience. The twist? They all already know someone else in the house; exes, family members, old friends, enemies. Who will make it to the end?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    57,735
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    71
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1853

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