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I'd Like To (Put My Fingers On You) by colonel_bastard for brodinsons (aeon_entwined)
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
01 Sep 2015
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Illya has a jealous streak. Napoleon encourages him.
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All You Need is Love (and Chocolate Cake) by fallingintodivinity
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015), The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
23 Mar 2016
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The way to an U.N.C.L.E. agent’s heart is through his stomach; or: how to cook for – and fall in love with – your partner in ten easy steps.
- Language:
- English
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- 6,064
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- 1/1
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- 1
- Comments:
- 109
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- 2038
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- 519
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- Words:
- 120,732
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 32
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The coffee machine is broken.
Illya stares at the piece of paper stuck over the front of it, the smiley face drawn underneath the damming Out of Order as if it somehow helps. The little touch display on the top refuses to light up, no matter how many times he pokes it.
Illya stares longingly at the broken machine, and then does what he normally does when he finds a problem he can’t immediately fix.
There’s a freshly painted sign over the café opposite as they jimmy the back door open and slip outside, elegant cursive that’s only just readable. “Solo’s,” Gaby reads aloud. “Well, let’s see what they’ve got.”
Series
- Part 1 of lay down my heavy load
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“Cowboy, hold still—”
“Shut up—”
With a resounding snap that echoed off the trees, the ice gave way. Illya barely had time to shout and see Napoleon’s startled expression before he vanished into the water.
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The UNCLE team goes on a mission to Norway, and things go sideways when Napoleon falls into a frozen lake. Illya has to save his partner, keep him alive, and hopefully finish their mission—and keep up pretending he's not in love with his favorite American spy. Only some of those objectives go the way he intends them to.Series
- Part 1 of Cowboy and Peril
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Illya kills an American spy in Zurich.
Three days later, he’s staring into the face of a dead man standing in his hotel room.
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You Must Be A Christmas Tree (You Light Up The Room) by chamel for Nixie_DeAngel
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
24 Dec 2020
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“So?” Napoleon says through a mouthful of cornbread. “You don’t have one, unless you’re secretly dating someone without me knowing?”
Illya winces and stares fixedly into his bowl. “They think I do.”
There’s a beat, and Napoleon swallows. “Ah. Anyone in particular, or…?”
Even as he asks, he suddenly knows that he does not want to know the answer to that question. Not really. There is no circumstance in which it is a good idea for him to find out the kind of person that his roommate would serve up as some idealized partner when lying to his coworkers. Probably said person is entirely made up, probably some equally tall and beautiful Russian, maybe even still back in Russia, which would make the most sense, honestly, and—
“It’s you, Cowboy.”
(Surely nothing could go wrong with attending holiday parties posing as the boyfriend of your Russian roommate who you're secretly in love with, right? Right??)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,287
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 50
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- 154
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- 26
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- 1010
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Since they're stuck in a safe house in the middle of nowhere at the end of November anyways, Napoleon figures he'll introduce another good old-fashioned American tradition to Illya and Gaby.
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hung up high in the gallery by inmoonlightigetseasick
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
11 Feb 2020
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It hits him, all at once, just how bad this has gotten. How he doesn’t know what he will do if Napoleon leaves him, how useless, how inconsolable it all feels. He thinks about Napoleon constantly, misses him like a limb when he’s gone, worries about him more than he worries about his own life. For the first time in his life, he thinks about retirement, about that possibility, of being together as long as Napoleon will let him stay, let him follow. He thinks about an end that isn’t death. It hits him, that’s all he wants, maybe, all he’s ever wanted, but never dreamed.
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What happens after Rome, and what happened long before. How Illya has staved off the push and pull that has always been inevitable. Regardless of how slow he's been to admit it.
Series
- Part 2 of where you always go
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maybe i'm fooling myself (and you're already gone) by sergeant_smudge
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
06 Oct 2017
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Napoleon is shot. It's Illya's fault.
He'll tear the world apart before he leaves him behind.
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all the minutes by Atanau, el3anorrigby, kaijusizefeels for the_worrying_kind
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
25 Jan 2019
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Five times Napoleon returned Illya's watch, and the one time he kept it.
OR
That fic I started based on the_worrying_kind's comment 6 MONTHS ago.
Update: added new chapter written by el3anorrigby and images by Atanau
Series
- Part 1 of If You Love Something Set It Free
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Negotiating with an escaped felon like Edith Partridge is always tricky, especially when she sends the sweetest letters.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,039
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 7
- Kudos:
- 19
- Bookmarks:
- 3
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- 391
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This is just fucking bonkers, I LOVE IT.
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They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing and expecting a different result.
Or, Illya gets stuck in a very whumpy time loop
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- Part 2 of Whumptober 2020 Prompt Fills
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pursuit of happiness by mitzvahmelting for kaijusizefeels
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
20 Jun 2018
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Illya flirts with Napoleon, and Napoleon's reaction is... not at all what Illya expected.
Written for the prompt, "Illya comes into the kitchen and sees Napoleon wearing nothing but an apron." Then it got away from me, because it's Pride Month, so it ended up ruminating a lot on cold war homophobia, the "lavender scare," and all the gay British spies.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,981
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 39
- Kudos:
- 414
- Bookmarks:
- 89
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- 3492
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Probably my favourite Napoleon x Illya fic ever
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"So congratulations, Peril," Napoleon drawled, looking so amused that he could see it was literally setting Illya's teeth on edge. "You have the supreme good fortune of getting to kiss me senseless. Now be a good sport and put your hands on my backside, would you? I'm beginning to feel neglected."
In which the boys have to go undercover as a couple, with Napoleon having a whale of a time while Illya isn't sure whether to knock Napoleon's teeth out or kiss him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,108
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 465
- Kudos:
- 6464
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- 1605
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- 70497
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Five times Illya tries to figure out what Napoleon’s kisses mean, and the one time he gets it and responds in kind.
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The CIA wants Napoleon back. So it's only natural for him to confess everything to Illya before he leaves UNCLE because he might not see the Russian again, or so he thinks.
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Catering by riverbed
Fandoms: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015), The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
21 Dec 2015
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Illya should be used to being taken care of by now.
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Napoleon and Illya go to ground in different ways.
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Napoleon accidentally stumbles upon one of Illya's secrets: he writes poetry. At first, he thinks this will be great fodder to tease his partner, but soon he finds he can't get the poems out of his head. They are erotic and romantic, two things he'd never thought to associate with Illya, but now he is seeing his partner in a new light and doesn't know what to do about it.
AKA the one where Illya writes erotic love poems, Napoleon finds them, and it starts to change their relationship.