1 - 20 of 653 Works in Female Hawke/Varric Tethras

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    It was well into the early hours of the morning and all was not quiet in the bedroom of the Champion.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    221
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    33
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Flemythal was terrible at due diligence and now Farrah was paying with her identity. The old witch ripped her body apart and put her back together again in a new reality. Again. And Again. Now she’s got this old god hitching a ride in her, she’s stolen some chicks identity, and if she’s not careful she just might start an arms race in Thedas.

    Join Farrah lose her identity, experience several existential breakdowns, have sex with Thedas (so much smut), make lasting friendships, and ride a horse named Dogg to death. No worries, he becomes the best undead horse ever.

    No beta reader. All the triggers. Graphic, explicit, a bit vulgar (a lot). Crackfic, so much crack it’s illegal.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    227,404
    Chapters:
    55/?
    Comments:
    339
    Kudos:
    76
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    3271
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Pockets, an orphan boy, lives a pretty simple life working at a shop and wooing every girl he comes across. He also tends to get in trouble with the law a lot, but that doesn't really matter when the Viscountess of Kirkwall is suddenly on your side, right?

    [aka, i'm bad at summaries and Eden Hawke adopts a child]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,491
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    22
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Viscount Varric and Viscountess Eden Hawke are bored out of their minds with all of their duties. Fortunately for them, they know a certain pirate who can distract Bran long enough to have fun. Chaos ensues (aka Kirkwall residents are crazy).

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,245
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    32
  5. Tags
    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    612
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    17
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Hawke provides a well-needed distraction during one of the Viscount's boring meetings. By which, distraction means she hides under Varric's desk and gives him a blowjob.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,054
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    13
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    204
  7. Tags
    Summary

    After Hawke and Varric have finally settled down, an old friend makes an unexpected appearance.

     

    I recommend reading Reuniting and Scars first, but it's not necessary.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,512
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    14
    Hits:
    55
  8. Tags
    Summary

    The love story of Eden Hawke and Varric Tethras, extremely oversimplified and summarized, from Varric's POV.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,669
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    93
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Hawke laughs, so long and so loud that he worries they’ll wake up the castle. The tendons in her throat stretch and the hollow of her collarbone fills with candlelight as she leans her head back, her skull making a soft thud against the stone wall. “You bastard,” she says, though he doesn’t know what he’s being scolded for.

    “I aim to please,” he replies, vague. Outside, he’s only just noticing, there are crickets chirping.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,354
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    110
  10. Tags
    Summary

    After the events at Adamant, Hawke and Varric are interrupted during an inopportune moment. It leads to a discussion on what their relationship means to them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,556
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    22
    Hits:
    128
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Varric and Hawke had been a thorn in Bran's side back when they were just scrappy ne'er-do-wells. Now that they're the Viscount and Viscountess of Kirkwall? They really won't let him catch a break. On the bright side, the two of them are having the time of their lives!

    Hawke and Varric ruin an otherwise lovely Orlesian salon. Bran ages ten years in five minutes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,269
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    73
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Hawke gives Anders a cat and an existential crisis, not in that order. Pour one out for Act I Anders, we hardly knew thee.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,093
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    106
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Varric Tethras, successful smut-peddler and true idiot, has been nominated for a prestigious literary award given by the most important critic in Thedas: The Randy Dowager. Worried that the dazzling dwarf of the flowing chest hair on his book jackets will not match the flannel-wearer that he is, he must tote along his smoke show best friend, Marian Hawke, in the guise of his lover to keep up appearances as erotica's favorite sybarite. This plan would be a hell of a lot easier to pull off if he wasn't head over tit in love with her.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,675
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    48
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    416
  14. Tags
    Summary

    It is harder to be a Red Jenny while also being the Viscountess but if anyone can make it work, its Rose.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    511
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    19
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Famed Kirkwall Author Varric Tethras, known for his works 'Hard in Hightown', 'The Tale of the Champion' and many more, returns this year with a sequel to his latest work, 'All This Shit is Weird'. The true story of Inquisitor Edie Lavellan: The Tale of the Outsider. Read the story of the otherworldy woman behind the Inquisitor, and discover how an immortal witch's visit to another world changed her life - and restored reality as we know it.

    Critics have called this tale of worlds beyond the Fade "frankly unbelievable", "utter tosh", "the only story about the Inquisition that's ever made sense", and "the greatest love story ever told". Reader, we implore you to join us for a tale that is certain to shock you to your core.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,268
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    191
  16. Tags
    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    285
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    24
  17. Tags
    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    181
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    23
  18. Tags
    Summary

    What happens when the ever-joking Eden Hawke can't find the joke anymore? Varric visits her home in hopes of a warm night; he instead finds her in the worst state he's ever seen her in.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,123
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    137
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Varric Tethras is a good man, even if he's a really, really dumb one. The story of one Varricmancing Hawke who waits for 14 years for her best friend to get his head out of his ass and ask her on a date, told in one-shots and drabbles as they come to me.

     

    Rating for future sexual content and may be bumped up to explicit.


    "You aren't saving yourself for who?"

     

    The voice from behind her makes her blood run cold and she freezes, hand clenching the tankard of ale so tightly her knuckles turn red. She is sure her eyes are nearly popping out of her head as they met Fenris' across from her, silently pleading for help. It isn't Fenris who comes to her rescue, however, as Merrill squeaks out from beside her, "Sebastian!"

     


    Right. Perfect.

     

    "Choir Boy?" Varric laughs as he pulls out the chair beside her and sits between her and Merrill. "Oh, this I've got to hear."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,733
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    59
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    398
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Varric debates bringing a tranquil Hawke to Skyhold.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    62,702
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    71
    Kudos:
    145
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    2198

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