1 - 20 of 29 Works in Evan "Buck" Buckley Has PTSD

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    Summary

    Something about the new guy irked Eddie. Something familiar about him that Eddie couldn’t place. He was an enigma, secrets hidden in that blank stare. Who was this mysterious man, and where did he learn to do those things? Where had Eddie seen him before?

    “You can have my back any day.” Eddie offered, silently willing Buck to read between the lines and hear Eddie really saying that he knew. That Eddie wanted to trust him.

    Bobby returned before Buck could reply. “Nice work, fellas. Glad you both made it out of there.”
     
    “Guy’s a professional, sir. Was never really worried.” Buck smiled.
     
    He could see Bobby about to nag Buck about the honorifics when the grenade detonated, still in the ambulance. Bobby startled and whirled around to face the explosion. Eddie had barely flinched, but Buck hadn’t so much as twitched - just watched the wreckage burn with a far off look in his eyes.

     
    In which Buck joined the 118 after transferring to the Navy Reserves and struggled with becoming a civilian. Eddie showed him how to feel worthy again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,071
    Chapters:
    8/10
    Comments:
    133
    Kudos:
    1040
    Bookmarks:
    338
    Hits:
    21889
  2. Tags
    Summary

    When Buck left the Navy Seals he went to Chicago and became a firefighter. While in Chicago, Buck started at FireHouse 51 where he met Kelly Severide and fell in love with him. Two years after asking out Severide, Andy Darden dies and Kelly gets hurt and goes off the deep end but they get through it. A lot happened Buck and Kelly got married but when Shay dies everything changes. Kelly goes off the deep end again but it's worse this time. Buck tries to help but Kelly keeps pushing him away so one day Buck goes to Cheif Wallace Boden and asked to be transferred to another station in LA. When he tells Kelly to see if he will stop him, he doesn't. Kelly lets the love of his life and husband walk out the door with his wedding ring in Kelly's hand. When Buck gets to LA he joins FireHouse 118 and changes himself.
    This is the Story of how Evan "Buck" Buckley-Severide became Evan "Buck" Buckley

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,959
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    207
    Bookmarks:
    64
    Hits:
    7140
  3. Tags
    Summary

    On the fourth day of Whumpmas, my whumper gave to me...

    Four triggers tripped...


    Whumpmas Day 4: Muzzled | Memories/Flashbacks

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,933
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    227
    Bookmarks:
    30
    Hits:
    2007
  4. Tags
    Summary

    After Eddie breaks the news of his departure from the 118, Buck isn't sure where to turn. The only constant he still has is his work, so he throws himself all in. Evidently, he doesn't know when to stop throwing. With talks far overdue and distance growing, will Buck and Eddie be able to mend what seems to have been broken for a while now?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,510
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    134
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1673
  5. Tags
    Summary

    It was pretty common knowledge that Evan Buckley was never entirely ‘ok’. It had been since he was a child. There were times when he was happy, or peaceful. There were times where he was safe and responsible. There were never times he was ok. But he managed it. He contained it, as well as he could anyway. He lived with it.

    Buck begins to become unraveled, but is guilt-ridden and desperate for nobody to find out this time. Eddie is desperate to find answers, and save his best friend before it's too late.

    hi :) i've been writing for a while, but this is the first fanfic i ever published, and i'm really nervous lmao :,) i myself live with BPD and OCD, and this story explores Buck as a person struggling with BPD, ADHD and PTSD. this story will contain discussions of physical and emotional child abuse. self-harm, suicide and disordered eating, along with the symptoms of the above illnesses. please proceed with caution if these topics are sensitive to you. happy reading, i hope you enjoy :))

    story titile: that funny feeling, bo burnham

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,164
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    82
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    867
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Eddie doesn't know how to handle all of this. His dad was always this stoic, unfeeling man. He doesn't want to be the same way anymore and Buck's there to make sure it doesn't happen.

    Aka I refuse to acknowledge the end of last night's episode.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,943
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    289
    Bookmarks:
    39
    Hits:
    2267
  7. Tags
    Summary

    After losing someone on a call, Buck's mind and memories play cruel tricks on him, leaving him at the mercy of his PTSD. Eddie is there to pick up the pieces and carefully put them back together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,713
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    274
    Bookmarks:
    44
    Hits:
    2555
  8. Tags
    Summary

    I always liked the rain.
    as a kid I’d go out and jump in the puddles, I loved running around in it.
    And when I got sick and got to skip school that wasn’t so bad either.

    When I would lay in my bed at night feeling so small and alone the sound of the rain was comforting.

    Then I got older, and I became a firefighter I found another reason to love the rain.

    Then the tsunami happened, and the rain was the background noise to the worst night of my life.

    I never thought I would hate the rain.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,340
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    56
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    1860
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Saying he wore his heart on his sleeve was accurate. But he kept things hidden. He told people enough so that they thought he was being honest. They wouldn’t ask questions if they thought he had already told them everything.

    But anyways.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,962
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    225
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    1635
  10. Tags
    Summary

    (I changed the name)
    the dizziness, the bruises, the faint spells. it all makes sense to Maddie. she's seen it all before, and her blood runs cold every time that Buck becomes slightly unsteady.
    ----
    Buck knows about Daniel, Buck is sick like Daniel. Maddie doesn't know what Buck does. and it all tumbles when his parents come to town.
    ----
    I fully blame an edit I found on TikTok for this. Dont read this if you don't like topics like religious trauma, or death, or other triggering topics like blood, bruising, sexual assault, or cancer.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,382
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    197
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    5825
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Evan Buckley had become used to the sound of sirens. A sound many people feared hearing, a sound literally designed to trigger one’s fight or flight, had become a source of comfort.

    The tsunami, the calls, the parents and the goddamn pressure. He couldn't take it, not like this. But he knew how to. Nobody can ever find out this time, not Maddie, and especially not Eddie.

    TW for this fic. Please read tags people. Take care of yourselves.

    Also slightly inspired by the song Touch by Sleeping at Last. References throughout the story. Please go listen to Sleeping at Last, they're so underrated omgg my lovessss

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    607
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    83
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1237
  12. Tags
    Summary

    “Hey, hey look at me, Evan,” he said, following Buck’s eye movement until they were locked on his. “What’s going on?”
    The question was a lot easier to ask than to answer because Buck didn’t truly know. The embarrassment and the fear were so evident on his face, the way his brow furrowed, the way his lips pressed into a thin line. What is wrong with me? Buck thought. I guess you never get used to seeing the person you care most about in the world almost die. When I heard the gunshot fire in the ambulance my feet were moving before I could even process what was happening. I had to get to him. I had to protect him. I had to be better than the last time. I couldn’t lose him. He could’ve died and I don’t think I could survive that.

    Where Buck gets triggered after a gun goes off in a movie and Eddie comforts him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,107
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    115
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    1233
  13. Tags
    Summary

    After thinking he'd escaped captivity, Buck finds himself right back in that hellhole and struggling to survive...except he can hear Christopher screaming for him as he drowns in the barrel...and Trevor's face flickers to Eddie's as a copper tang floods his mouth—

    Buck wakes up from one of the worst night terrors he's had in years and he calls the one person he knows can help.


    Bingo Square: Jolting awake after a nightmare and being comforted.

    Whumptober Day 28: It's Not Just In Your Head | "Good. You're Finally Awake." | nightmares | panicked

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,832
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    222
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    2690
  14. Tags
    Summary

    After the dreaded mission that takes the lives of Buck’s teammates, he is honorably discharged. After somewhat recovering, he goes on a mission to deliver his teammates last letters to their families. He also needs to find out what he’s going to do with the rest of his life...

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    51,180
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    93
    Kudos:
    347
    Bookmarks:
    73
    Hits:
    8332
  15. Tags
    Summary

    The body moves, and the-body-who-is-the-man stops moving. He is looking for someone, someone important. But he can't quite... was the shirt yellow or green? blonde hair or brown? he was wearing glasses, wasn't he? The man just knows he has to find a little boy, keep him safe, it's his job to keep that kid safe.

    Christopher looks at his dad and asks, "have you seen Buck?" and Eddie's heart falls to the floor.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    562
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    149
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    2194
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Buck and Eddie go out on their very first date, but afterwards doesn't go the way either of them thought it would.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,681
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    176
    Bookmarks:
    28
    Hits:
    1297
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Buck has gone through extensive therapy to be in the place that he is currently. Dr Copeland has helped, Eddie’s occasional (now permanent) comfort helped. He’s gone through a lot, he knows that. He knows that his childhood was not normal, by any means. He knows, logically, that he is worth something.

    It’s just sometimes, he doesn’t quite believe that. And he needs Eddie to understand that.

    And Eddie? Eddie doesn’t need help, despite everything that’s happened. He’s perfect a-o-fucking-kay

    Or

    Buck talks and explains his childhood, he tells Eddie everything that’s going on

    and

    In which Eddie tells Buck all

    Bingo Slot : Childhood Trauma, Flashbacks

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,271
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    296
    Bookmarks:
    51
    Hits:
    5443
  18. Tags
    Summary

    “Wow. So you and Buck are…?” He trails off. And that. That is the comment that causes Eddie’s face to turn bright red. He knows how his spiel sounded, knows what Michael is implying.

    “We’re uh,” he clears his throat, “We’re just friends. He has a girlfriend.”

    Michael hums, tilts his head a bit, and then says, “but is that all you want to be?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,679
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    233
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    1918
  19. Tags
    Summary

    It's been one year since the awful ladder truck bombing incident, and everything that followed after. Buck would rather crawl back into bed and forget the whole thing, but he trudges through it, nearly making it through the day until a loud sound throws him off. Eddie is there to take care of him, just like always.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,430
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    273
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    3862
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Buck knew Eddie was a wolf from the minute he caught his scent. Now, if anyone asks, the reason he was being a dick was exactly the reason he gave to Eddie. It was not because he was insecure, or, even worse, because Eddie is a wolf and Buck is a cat (a big cat, but still). Buck has minimal issues with dogs, but Eddie was also an unknown were on his territory.

    Buck’s a werecreature but the rest of the 118 thinks he’s a clueless human.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,790
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    54
    Kudos:
    895
    Bookmarks:
    85
    Hits:
    9725

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