Comment on Hide Your Love Away

  1. Sheron

    Main event: I LOVED the dynamic between Steve & Tony in this. It felt like the start of the story followed a familiar horrifying realization from Tony that he's lost the one he loved, and then when Steve's back things shift. I liked the way you've written the team formation scene, with Tony slowly realizing how uncomfortable Steve is with everything, even if he completely misattributes the reasons. And then finally we get to the discovery of the soulmark after Tony gets his second (!) amnesia.

    Steve's horrified reaction? MY HEART. I just... adore it! I kind of felt like he was already horrified by something more than just the discovery that Tony is truly his soulmate (and horrified is perhaps not the right word here, because you seamlessly make it obvious to the reader that there's something that Steve is absolutely freaked out about even while he's also confirming the meaning of his soulmark via Tony's RT.) His "Oh, no. And I-- oh, God." just stuck in my brain to the point that I can find that place in the story just by searching for "And I-- oh,". (I may have read this story five times. To the point of starting to memorize certain lines. I was obsessed. XD)

    And Tony of course can't possibly imagine what's going on with Steve, utterly convinced as he is that Steve can't be his. (His whole train of thought about Steve and Sharon fucking because they muuuuust be each other's soulmates is just so cynically heartbrokenly him.)

    [Steve shakes his head. The rest of him is shaking, too, trembling with something that might be anger and might be-- ]

    I love the way you can draw your own conclusions about Steve's state of mind here. <333

    And then, one of the most amazing analogies I've read in this fandom: [Tony's been preparing for amnesia his entire life, really.] The way he feels like he'd been blackout drunk for two years. That was amazingly done! Wow. I had never thought of it like that but as soon as I read that scene I thought it was just perfect. The way he doesn't quite know what he's apologizing for but wants to apologize and feels like such a failure. Guh! I just love the way you write Tony, and the insights into his character that you bring out here are simply stunningly on point.

    And then, to top it off, the insight into Steve's state of mind that you show with such a simple little moment:

    ["Are you a superhero too?"
    The man -- Steve -- looks even more sad. He's gazing off into the middle distance. "Sort of," he says. He makes a noise that's not exactly a laugh. "I used to be."]

    WOW. I.. can't even begin to describe my feelings about it. Somewhere between screaming YESSS and OMGGGG and AHHHH. Because Steve has stopped feeling like a superhero, thanks to the job, thanks to everything that he's been doing and not being on the Avengers -- and it's so clearly crushing him, but Tony has no context for what being Cap even means to Steve. GUH. I will carry this perfect moment in my memories.


    I also want to say that rather than being total angstfest the story had that wonderful flow of humour and candor interspersing the painful scenes. Like the scene with Tony thinking Bucky is his soulmate is that right blend of hilarity and sweetness (because Bucky is kind to him, and I never felt a sense of second hand embarrassment for Tony thanks to the way you handle this potentially monumentally awkward moment when people other than Steve and Tony start to find out). (Also Tony's sheer happiness and recognition of Steve as a person and then as his soulmate was so sweet and so honest and just earnestly Tony Stark. *flails*)

    And also the bit where Tony is so himself in this story!
    ["You're wrong," Tony says.
    Steve laughs, a sad, harsh bark of a sound. "Christ, you didn't even remember your own name yesterday morning and you're still fighting me.]

    I kind of had a similar reaction to Steve here. *hearts*

    Comment Actions