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It's Okay

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The Green Paladin was the physical manifestation and representation of the Green Lion, the Guardian of Life. But what was life? Life was movement and joy and pain and sadness and laughter and freedom. He had been full of life. 


Pidge didn't know if she was worthy of being a paladin anymore, let alone the Green Paladin. What was the point of anything anymore when you couldn’t protect those you love? When everyone died or left her behind regardless.


She knew the others were worried about her but she struggled to bring herself to care. Yes, Shiro, she was aware she was being aloof and shying away from touch… but no more so than before right? Mourning wasn’t going to solve anything nor bring him back (that would make it real) . The safest and most logical (cowardly) course of action was to devote herself to the constant stream of coding and technology. Definitely not avoiding the rest of the team (family) - because look where that had gotten her! Mother abandoned, father and brother missing but presumed dead; her foolish quest to find them was ridiculous and now her self-indulgence had cost Lance his life. Stupid stupid alien surveillance footage. 


“Pidge?” Quiznak. Hunk. How long had it been this time? “Pidge c’mon please, you need to eat something and get some rest. It’s been three quintants now.” Oh yeah, no wonder why the worry shone so clearly through his voice.


Lance would be ashamed of me, wouldn’t he? Pidge, c’mon give yourself a break, let us in. His voice inside her head was crystal clear, cutting through her excuses and self-pity faster than Keith slicing droids. Because no, he wouldn’t be ashamed, he would be concerned. And caring and understanding and loving. Because he was her brother , who had held her together when she needed to fall apart. And now, she realised why, because he understood, his wisdom light-years beyond anything anyone credited him for. Family wasn’t a weakness, but laughter, tears and cuddles.


The Blue Paladin was the physical manifestation of the Blue Lion, the Guardian of Water. Water was what connected all life forms; it was the glue, the foundation, the leg, the lifeblood. It was clean and resurrection and purity and grief and tears. It was family.


Pidge opened the door.